Sydney POV
Poke.
…
"Poke." I say, poking his ribs again.
Austin barely smiled while emptying his backpack.
"How was the rest of your day?" He asked.
Finally.
I have your attention.
He was pretending not to notice me.
Meanie.
"It was good." I smile. "What about you?"
He suddenly pulled me into his arms and pecked my cheek. "Wonderful. Because I have you right next to me."
I blush and look away.
He's too sweet.
"Thanks. I missed you."
"We saw each other after every period. And were together all sixth hour!"
Stupid geography teacher.
We colored a map.
No…seriously.
It's due in class for a grade. A map of Eastern Europe, that has to be labeled by permanent marker, color coded and come with a separate key.
Busy work sucks hardcore.
At least we got to push our desks together so that when I looked up to check my book to make sure I was right on Estonia and not labeling the capitol of Latvia or some other small country they invented after World War II, I saw my wonderful boyfriend.
I saw him Saturday night too. Mom and Dad bought my "I need to work on a project with a friend" excuse, went to Austin's at 6, met his Mom, watched TV, got dressed up and went on our date.
We went to the Cheesecake Warehouse. It was nice and peaceful, with a table near the window.
After we finished we went to get ice cream, he got me a rose, we kissed some and then I reluctantly drove home at 11.
We stayed up until 4 that night texting.
I wanted to stay with him longer, Mom said I needed to be back by 12, but Austin insisted that I go home early, so I wouldn't arouse suspicion.
"I know. But that doesn't mean I can't miss you." I say.
He shrugged and closed his locker.
"Vending machines?" He asked.
I nod, and he takes my hand.
"So…have you talked to your mom and dad about us?"
Crap.
I…
"I've been trying to think of a way to tell them, but I can't!"
He bites his lip and doesn't say anything.
I know he doesn't like that I haven't told them yet.
"They'll be fine with it Sydney. You're not their little baby anymore. You're 16, and can make decisions on your own now. Including dating someone." He said quietly.
"I know…I'm just still scared how much they trust me."
He looked at me weird as we arrived at the machines.
"Syd, I know I haven't met them, but they trust you. I mean…your dad pulled you aside and told you 100% the truth about what happened when you were born. That requires a lot of trust in you. If I was him, I would have been scared to death."
I bite my lip and go for my billfold.
Lemonade sounds good.
"No no…you know the rule."
I groan.
He pays with his credit card.
He gives kids help in baseball for $15 an hour. That's how he spends a lot of time during the winter.
He's going to start AAU ball soon. Practice for his team starts the same weekend Kevin and Corey have their tryouts.
This weekend.
"Which one?"
"Lemonade please." I say.
"Coming up…"
Thunk.
I bend down and grab it.
Beside me, Austin is pressing buttons on the snack machine.
Granola bar.
He's trying to eat healthy, and has been working out like crazy apparently.
He unwraps it and takes a bite.
"Yum yum." I say flatly.
I hate granola bars.
I'd rather have a salad, which I don't like either.
I like real food.
"C'mon. The meeting is about to start." He said.
I walk with him towards the black box.
Sikowitz scheduled this to announce the cast for the play.
I'm excited.
By the time we get there, he's ready to toss his wrapper in the trash.
"Already?"
He turns to me, blushing and cheeks bulging.
"Boys…" I sigh.
…
"Oh you love me." He smiled, then kissed my hair.
"Hey." I smile at Ellie and sit next to her.
Austin slips by both of us.
"Hey!" Ellie smiles at me. "Hey Austin."
"Hey Ellie. How are you?" He replied, sitting next to me and grabbing my hand.
For good luck hopefully.
"I'm good." Ellie smiled, then looked back to her phone.
We're about 3 rows deep, which is good. Seats are filling up fast.
60 people are involved in this play, including tech people, and everyone was invited.
"Ok students…you know the drill about phones, I don't care that it's after school hours, I don't want to see them, don't want to hear them." Sikowitz entered thru the backdoor.
The room went quiet as he set his bag down, then sat on the stage.
Weird.
There's a chair just to the left of the stage. Just sitting there.
I thought he'd move it.
"So…I assume you all assumed I called this meeting to announce the cast of "Whose whom is who. Well, you thought wrong."
Huh?
"I'm cancelling the play." He said simply and calmly.
WHAT?
"What?" Multiple people yelled.
"Why?" Others asked.
"Settle down. I had no choice. Your auditions were a train wreck to put it kindly. Some of the worst I've ever seen in my time here."
The room was dead silent.
I thought I did good!
I glance at Austin, and he looks embarrassed.
He was so happy because he thought it went perfectly.
I squeeze his hand, and he squeezed back.
Poor baby.
"The people I asked to join me behind the curtain certainly weren't impressed. Which is a shame, because they are the best students I've ever had the privilege to teach. I'm thankful that they agreed to come here today to speak to you all about what I expect and demand in the future."
Then he suddenly pulled out a cellphone and started typing.
Is he…
Is Sikowitz texting?
HE CAN TEXT?
Several of the seniors in the back laugh, and he quickly said "Settle down in the back."
Robbie POV
It's so quiet.
The quiet before the storm.
We're in the auditorium. Just waiting for Sikowitz to text Beck that he's ready for us.
I've been waiting all weekend for this.
I spent most of the weekend at the batting cages with Corey, Matt and Kevin. Watching them hit, talking, being the judge if something was close, etc.
It was relaxing.
Cat was in the studio, and Syd went to a friend's house on Saturday to work on school stuff.
Boring weekend.
The boys are pumped about this coming weekend. Tryouts are this week, and Kevin and Matt are trying to get in a zone.
They want to be on the same team this year, and I can't blame them. It was obvious when they played last year that they weren't comfortable, and it was brother on brother.
Corey is giddy. This is his first year, and I'll be spending most of my time with his group.
I'm trying to keep him grounded and say that he'll be fine. But he's worried nobody will pick him, or that he'll be bad.
In reality, I'm positive he is better than Kevin was at his age, and Kevin tore it UP last year.
He was the first intentional walk I've ever seen live.
Granted I really don't do baseball much.
But for griefs sake he was 11, but he was on such a tear that they gave him 4 balls and loaded it up.
He was so mad after that game because the next guy hit into a game ending double play. He made me promise that I wouldn't tell Mom that he cried he was so frustrated.
The next game in his first at bat he bounced one off the wall, then smacked his gloves together loudly.
He's a bit of a showboat, and we're trying to fix that.
Sorry, back to Corey. I know he's better because he knows what to do basically, which Kevin didn't really know. Kevin learned thru Matt.
Hopefully Corey will get on a team with some of his friends, and he'll be comfortable.
His best aspect is that he can run like the wind. He's super fast for a kid his age.
When we were practicing fielding for Matt and Kevin, with Kevin at third, his natural position.
It was full length for their league, a little long for Corey, but it was more for the other two and not for him. Which he was fine with.
Until he beat out Kevin's throw.
Mind you, Kevin's played third since he was 9. Year 3 at the hot corner. He knows what to do.
But Corey flat beat it out.
I thought it was a coincidence until he did it again.
And again.
AND AGAIN.
He didn't even seem winded. He was actually giggling about it. Which Kevin didn't like and told him to shut up, and made me tell him to settle down.
Kevin hugged him and apologized later, which was good.
But right now we're just…waiting.
"Hey guys look." I hear Jade say.
Andre and Cat, who are looking at pictures on the wall turn to Jade, who is about 10 feet away from them, looking at a certain picture.
I walk over, with Beck and Tori behind me.
It's the cast picture.
The one that made us the "Golden Group".
I forget when we got dubbed that. It was around the time Tori, Jade, Beck, Cat and Andre were all extremely hot and popular. This picture got online, showing we've known each other forever and went to school together.
So we got named the "Golden Group".
I'm always called the least successful one in the media, but a 20 year comedy tour run, with sponsorships by Deka and other name brands doesn't sound like a failure to me.
I'm just not the name that everyone else is.
"I didn't know they kept it up." Tori said.
"Guess they did." Andre said.
"We look so young." I say.
God my hair.
So poofy and untrimmed.
It goes in this order.
Beck, Jade, Tori, Andre, Cat and I.
Ironically, that's how the marriages went too.
Beck and Jade, Tori and Andre, Cat and Me.
"It's a good picture." Beck says.
"Eh. I should have brushed my hair." Jade said.
"We had no time!" Cat piped up. "It was right after the play!"
"I know, but still." Jade said.
Blink.
"Is that him?" Tori asked, as Beck dug in his pocket.
"Yep."
"Okay!" Andre said peppily, as we started towards the door.
We decided to wait in here so nobody would see us.
I follow Cat out the door, and into the deserted hallways.
Everyone talked about this when we arrived.
When we get in there, we aren't parents.
We're professionals, who need to set them straight.
Their effort isn't going to cut it. If they're serious, they need to cut the crap and be serious.
I gently rub Cat's arm as the door to the black box comes into view.
We got this.
It doesn't matter who is in the class, the message is the same.
Beck entered first, and we all followed.
The room burst into noise.
"Oh my god."
"Is that…"
"That's Cat Valentine!"
"Tori Harris!"
"It's the Golden Group."
I easily ignore it all and follow everyone else to the stage.
"Settle down everyone. In your seats." Sikowitz said, standing near a chair to my right.
I glance down to the others.
I think we accidentally did something.
Beck, Jade, Tori, Andre, Cat and me.
We sat in our normal order.
Oops.
The room still is buzzing quietly.
I look up, and see Sydney and Ellie looking borderline frightene…
…
Who's the guy?
And why is he holding Sydney's hand?
They look…together.
I exchange a discreet glance with Cat, and look back to him.
He let go.
As I'm watching, he subtly shifted away from her.
"Alright everyone. This is who was behind the curtain. As I said, they're my best students ever. And they agreed with me that the auditions were terrible."
"Thanks Sikowitz." Beck smiles at him.
Beck's the closest to him. Cat and I are on the other side.
"No problem Beck. I'll go ahead and let you all have the floor." He sat down.
Someone in the back raised their hand.
"Yes?" Sikowitz asked.
"Will there be a autograph session after this?"
My jaw dropped, as Jade and Tori snorted in disbelief.
"You…that right there. There you go." Tori said, gesturing frustration already.
"You clearly don't get it, and no. No autographs." Jade snapped.
"But you're the golden group!" someone else said.
"Don't call us that!" We all say, causing the room to go quiet.
"We don't like that nickname." Beck said.
"Why not?"
"It doesn't matter. Sit down." I say coldly.
"You will address them by their last names. Mr. Oliver, Mrs. Oliver, Mr. and Mrs. Harris, Mrs. Valentine and Mr. Shapiro. Are we clear?" Sikowitz said.
"Valentine? You're Sydney's mo—" A blonde stood up and said.
"SHUT UP!" Ellie yelled, hopping up.
In a flash, she had already whipped her scissors out.
But not fast enough.
Poiiiiiinnnggg….
"What the…?" Ellie said, turning to face the front.
They ended up in the door.
Redirected by Jade's own throw.
Jade is simply smiling and twirling another pair of scissors.
"So…I heard about the scissors." Jade said acidically, smiling devilishly.
"I…" Ellie sputtered.
"Sit down. I know you don't have any more. Just remember that you aren't the master. I am."
Ellie meekly sat down.
Jade kept twirling the scissors.
Beck stood up and clapped his hands once.
"Okay…now that we've gotten the entertainment portion of the show over with, I'm going to talk now. Sikowitz spoke to us about a month ago, expressing frustration about you guys not trying in rehearsals or tryouts. Which I find ridiculous. That's when you get better. That's when you become your role." He said.
Somebody raised their hand in the back.
"Yes." Beck pointed at him.
He stood and said "Honestly sir, those rehearsals are a waste of time and effort for everyone."
"Oh really?" Jade said haughtily.
"You're way wrong." Cat said, making the whole room snap onto her.
In a room of stars, she's the star.
"What's your name man?" Beck asked him.
"David."
"Ok David…" Beck turned to Sikowitz, who was sitting. "Has he gotten any roles? And was he good?"
"No and no." Sikowitz said flatly, not moving and keeping his arms crossed.
"Ok. Then you can sit down, because your opinion frankly doesn't matter." Beck said simply.
"Yeah it does." Someone said.
"No it doesn't." Tori jumped in. "He hasn't done anything, and that makes sense because he thinks doing the work is a waste of time!"
The entire room was silent.
Sydney's friend is still as a board.
"I'll be honest." I say, then clear my throat. "I'm mad about how bad those auditions were. You all should be ashamed. They were horrific."
"Terrible." Andre said.
"Train wreck." Cat added.
Suddenly people really got nervous.
"Out of curiosity, and Sikowitz won't punish you…how many of you think that auditions and rehearsing is a big waste of time?"
More than 75% of the room shot their hands up.
Not Sydney and Ellie and Sydney's boy toy.
I'm not believing that for a second.
I turn to Beck. "I think there are more people, but they're intimidated to say so." I say.
"Agreed." Jade frowned.
"Me too. And that's a shame. It really is. You know why?" Beck said.
…
"Because we're here to help. Sikowitz said he can't find a way to motivate you guys. And I see why. You're all a bunch of complacent kids, coasting."
"Hey!" Several people said, mostly in the back.
Sikowitz jumped in. "Those in the back are mostly seniors."
"Truth hurts guys." Tori said.
"You guys will never amount to anything in theater. I guarantee it." Jade said darkly.
Someone stand up.
"Why do you say that?"
Suddenly Cat stood up and started walking towards the back.
The room turned as she walked.
Then she snapped "Eyes forward!"
The entire class jumped and turned forward.
"The reason she said that, is because you're seniors, and you aren't busting your butts to create a legacy! That's horrible! Unbelievable! And unacceptable! When we were seniors we stayed up late night after night, working here and at each other's houses to make sure that we got the roles we WANTED. So people would remember who we were after we left. We wanted to be the best senior class ever!" Cat yelled.
"And you were." Sikowitz smiled.
Then Cat spoke up again.
"And don't look back here. I'm tired of you guys staring at me and not listening. Grow up." She said bitterly.
Practically every guy gulped nervously.
"Would anyone like to attempt a defense of why they didn't try to impress Sikowitz for this play?" Andre asked.
I let out a breath and stretch my legs out so that I'm basically crouching.
…
"Nobody?" Tori called out.
Silence.
"Geez. I'm sorry. This is pathetic. I was expecting people to be mad. To be upset Sikowitz cancelled your own damn play. You get 4 per year, he takes one away and nobody seems to care. Absolutely pathetic." Beck says, scowling.
He looks like he's playing a role he did in a TV show.
He was always mad and generally the bad guy.
Except this is actually Beck.
And he doesn't pretend to be mad just to do it. If he's fine, he's chill.
But if you piss him off, there is no going back.
"Who is evaluating the talent that gets admitted nowadays Sikowitz?" I ask
Suddenly everyone really tensed up.
"Me, Helen and two outside officials." He replied.
"Do you think you chose wisely?" Andre asked.
"I do. Even though they're all on autopilot."
Suddenly Jade stuck her second pain of scissors into the stage behind us.
"WAKE UP PEOPLE. Geez…"
"You all know that talent alone doesn't cut it right? You have to work hard out in the real world, otherwise they'll have no problem giving your part to somebody else." Tori said.
"How do you think I got all my Oscars? By sitting in my dressing room playing on my phone?" Beck said.
"What about me? I spent thousands of hours in the studio, alone, practicing lines and singing when I could have been with my children. I would have PREFERRED to be with my kids. But I love what I do. I love singing and I love acting. So I made that sacrifice and put in the work." Cat said. "And look at me now."
"Your complacency is ridiculous." Jade said.
"I think it's an insult to the school." I boldly say.
Every eye snaps to me.
"Go on Robbie. You're onto something." Sikowitz said.
"Ok. It's an insult to the school, and to every person that's ever walked thru the front doors of this building. Those lockers? We used those. Everybody has. We knew exactly where to go when Sikowitz said to meet him in the black box. This is OUR school. We killed ourselves for that diploma, and for the recognition and for a future."
I hop up and stride to the back.
"The fact that all of you, but especially the seniors don't seem to care is insulting to me. I'm personally insulted and offended." I say, looking down at them.
None of them are meeting my gaze.
"You're disgracing the reputation of this school, which we all worked to enhance. We are the most famous graduates of Hollywood Arts. And you're hurting all of us by your shameful laziness."
I turn back and sit back on the stage.
"If any of you ever came up to me on the street and said you were a graduate of Hollywood Arts, I honestly wouldn't believe you. You don't look like graduates, you certainly don't act like it, and that drives me CRAZY." Jade said. "Sikowitz is the best theater teacher in the state. He's the best I ever had. The best any of us ever had. He pushes you, which you can hate all you want. I know, and I hate to say this…"
Sikowitz motioned her to continue.
"I know we all basically hated him by the time we graduated. He worked us to death, and wore us down with his constant exercises and drills and rehearsing. But you know what? When we started doing this for a living, it was easier than it was here. And we all realized how lucky we were to have him. That's what makes me so mad. You've got this gold mine right in front of you, and you're throwing it in his face." Jade finished.
Well…
We didn't mean to turn this into an angry rant, but that's what happened.
I know now that everyone is furious.
"I think we've made the point I was hoping to get across here. Your effort won't cut it. It is unacceptable and I'm not going to tolerate it. I've been easy on you guys, certainly easier than I was on them. But I'm going to revert back to how I used to do things. Starting Wednesday I want everyone in here at 6 AM sharp. I lock the doors at 6:01. We work until school starts. Then after school we rehearse from 2:30 to 5. Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. If effort doesn't improve, I'm going to recommend to Helen that we deny scholarships and enrollment spots."
The room is dead silent.
"And for you seniors, don't think I won't make 4 years here totally worthless. I'm not signing a diploma unless I believe you've earned it. Your clock is ticking. I expect better."
"I expect perfection." Cat called out.
"You're all dismissed. See you tomorrow." Sikowitz disdainfully waved them away.
Cat strode to the front as Jade went to the door and wrenched her and Ellie's scissors out of the door, then stuffed them in her purse.
"Let's go home." Cat said.
I nod, and rise.
The class is fleeing as fast as they can.
Andre gave Sikowitz and fist pound, Tori hugged him while Beck and Jade were already out the back door.
"Hope we helped." Cat said.
"I think you did."
"Email if it didn't help. We might be able to drop in." I say.
"I'll make sure I can." Cat said, frowning.
"Thank you. Have an nice night." Sikowitz said.
"You too." I clap his shoulder.
Cat and I quickly get to the SUV, then speed out to the light and beat the student traffic.
Good.
The ride home was silent, mostly narrated by Cat taking deep breaths, trying to calm down.
The boys are with my mom and dad today. We'll get them for dinner later.
"I think Sydney has been hiding something from us." I say.
"The guy?" Cat said. "I agree."
"I…I just asked her a couple of days ago if anything was going on. After I told her about her dad." I say, trying to stay calm.
Can somebody pull the gigantic knife in my back out?
I feel double crossed.
Betrayed by Sydney.
"We'll talk to her. I'm sorry she didn't tell you." She rubbed my leg.
"What's bother me more than that, is the fact that I know she'll take Sikowitz and us serious about the acting. The fact she lied to me, right after I finally told her the biggest secret we had…I don't know."
Cat didn't say anything, but kissed my cheek.
"You think they're dating?" I ask.
"Oh I know they're dating. I think she's lied to me too. I told you how she went out with friends that Saturday you were gone. This one too."
"Ohh…" I gasp.
I get it now.
She's been going and seeing him in secret.
"She could have told us. Right? I have no problem with it." I say, pulling into the neighborhood.
"Absolutely. I don't like it either. And she's two cars behind us." Cat said.
I try to stay calm and park, then walk inside just as she pulled up.
Water.
Get water.
I'm SO…SOOOOOO mad.
I can't believe she'd do this to me.
I…I've always been supportive of the guys she's been interested in the past! I have no problem with her having a boyfriend. Really! There's evidence to back that up!
I hear the door open and close, then a sniffle.
I sip my water at the island in the kitchen as she entered thru the door.
She looks like she's been crying.
"Did you guys have to be so harsh?" She said throatily.
"Yeah. You were terrible." I say coldly.
Sydney looked to her mom, who was getting a wine glass.
It's 5:01.
"Don't look at me. I gave you a 13 out of 40." Cat said simply.
Sydney sniffled and wiped her eyes.
"What was so bad? Can you at least tell me?"
"Sure." Cat said. "No passion, no energy, nothing. It sounded like you were reading out of a book."
Sydney stayed still, and then looked to me.
"Really? Because I was nervous."
"Why were you nervous?' I ask.
"I wasn't 100% familiar with the script."
"That's your fault. I was wondering why you weren't really reading it." I tell her.
Again, Syd appealed to her mom.
"Hey, I can't help you. He's right. Just because you're talented doesn't mean you can just wing it."
"I didn't wing it!"
"Sounded like you did." Cat said simply, with a frown.
Sydney bit down, a clear sign she's angry.
"I think we should talk about something else." I say.
"Yeah…I need to tell you guys something." Sydney said, as I join Cat at the kitchen table.
"About your boyfriend?" Cat got right to the point.
Sydney immediately sputtered and blushed.
"It was obvious."
"When. How long." I say simply.
"A…a month basically…"
"A month?" I gasp out.
"You didn't tell us for a month?" Cat said, stunned.
"I…I didn't know how to say it! It happened on my birthday!" She cried out, wiping away a falling tear.
"That's great baby. I'm happy for you." I smile.
"How'd he ask you out?"
"I…He…" She said, then stopped.
"Sydney…" I say.
"You won't like it."
"There's nothing we can do about it now." I say. "It doesn't matter. Just tell us."
"The truth can't hurt you sweetie." Cat smiled.
"He…he baked me cupcakes and took me to the beach."
…
"The beach?" Cat said.
"During school?" I ask.
She didn't look up from the floor and nodded.
"The…the night I was so late we went to a movie together. That's why we were so late. We didn't eat that night."
I hear Cat sigh, and I bite my lip.
"I'm sorry we yelled at you so much then sweetheart. I hope we didn't ruin anything." I say.
"I…when I called you on my birthday…that was just to buy more time with him. I'm sorry." She apologized.
"It's fine. No problem." Cat smiled.
"I assume you haven't been going out with your friends these last couple of weekends." I say.
She wiped her eyes and nodded.
Cat got up and pulled her into a hug.
"Sydney…we love you. And we're happy for you ok? Very happy. What's his name?"
"…Austin."
Nice name.
"And you like him?"
Sydney just hugged Cat and nodded into her shoulder.
"We're happy Sydney. I'm glad you found a guy that makes you happy." I say.
"Thanks daddy…"
"But…I have to say one thing."
Cat let her go and sat back down.
"What?" She asked me.
"Can you just…explain to me why you didn't tell me last Friday after rehearsals in the park? I know we haven't talked about that as a group, but your mom knows what happened." I say. "I was miserable for weeks before I talked to you. I was scared to death that you'd scream at me that you hated me, and for me to go away and never come back because I'd lied all your life. Ok? I can't stress how important to me that I be honest with you. And like Cat said, we're happy about this. I asked if anything was going on. And you said no."
She's got tears cascading down her face, thru her hands.
"Did I do something wrong Sydney?" I ask. "Are you ok with what I told you? Because right now, I'm scared you don't trust me. And that's a problem." I say.
She let out a strangled cry and sobbed.
Oh crap.
Ohhh…no.
I glance at Cat, who looks sad.
I whisper "Did I go too far?"
She shook her head.
I think I did.
Sydney simply kept crying in the middle of the kitchen.
I bite my lip, and then say "Maybe this was a bad time to bring it up. I'll go get the boys." I tell Cat, then rise and walk to Sydney.
She shielded herself from me and kept crying, leaning on the island.
It's heartbreaking.
Truly heartbreaking.
Sydney POV
Pull it together…
COME ON!
Hug him!
He loves you!
I can't stop crying uncontrollably though.
I hear him stop to grab his keys, and then walk out the door.
Slam.
I let out a wail and dive for mom, who scooped me up.
"Baby…it's ok…"
"I'm sorry mommy…I didn't mean it!" I cry out, still sobbing.
"I know baby…"
"I just didn't know how to say it! You guys have been so busy with Corey and Kevin…and I've been all alone! Driving and doing my license…I…"
I plop back into her shoulder.
And cry.
"It's ok. Sydney. He's just mad."
"Mad?" I cry out.
"Yeah. Because he was torturing himself about lying to you all your life. It was necessary, but he insisted that he tell you alone. He wanted to make sure that you knew he loved you and trusted you. And to him, you threw it in his face."
"AND I DID!" I sob harder than ever.
"Shhh…you meant well baby. It's ok."
"I…"
I gotta ask.
"Yeah Sweetie?" Mom asked.
"It's true? Everything he did for me? All that stuff about Cameron Brooks the star? And his girlfriends?"
I feel mom sigh, then squeeze me.
"Yeah baby. Totally true. You can look it up if you want. Most of it is online. That's why we never said to Google yourself. That and it's not healthy. There are pictures…and proof, and I can always answer questions." Mom hugged me tight. "Do you have anything you want to ask me?"
"Why didn't you say yes to Dad in high school? At Hollywood Arts?" I sob.
I don't get it!
If you love each other, then get together!
"It's complicated…but basically I was naïve and didn't notice how much he cared about me. I broke his heart really bad. But it worked out because your father is an amazing guy. He cares. That's his best skill. He's funny, but he's best at loving and caring about people." She whispered.
"And those girlfriends? He made it sound like I broke up two relationships!" I cry, lifting my head off her shoulder.
"Well…you did. I did too, and I still feel bad, because he was happy."
"As happy as he is now?"
Mom shook her head. "No, but he was happy."
"Why'd he do all that for me? Yeah, he loved me, but he did more than that! It just seems too good to be true!" I say.
Mom suddenly smiled.
"That's who he is sweetie. Jade told me once I woke up in the hospital that when he held you for the first time, you could see him falling for you. He was in and that was that. I should have dumped Cameron then, because I just wasted time. And since he loved you, he did anything for you. He worked tons of graveyard shifts and late nights, just to pay the bills while I was gone."
"You didn't do that?" I ask.
"I tried, but he didn't cash the checks I sent him. He did it on his own for you. Don't underestimate his heart. That's why he's hurt. He put his heart out for you when he broke the news about all that. And you didn't mean it, but it hurt him because he loves you."
"What do I do now?" I ask.
"Talk to him in a day or two. Let him cool off. He's just hurt, but after a day or two, probably Saturday once the boys get done with baseball, you guys can go get ice cream and fix it."
I wipe my eyes as I feel more tears coming on.
"I didn't mean to hurt him…I didn't even know it would! If I had I would have said something! I just didn't know how to say I suddenly have a boyfriend." I say. "That's important! Not something I can just say and move on from."
Mom suddenly hugged me again.
"You fell into the trap I fell into many times. And still do to this day. You mean well, but do bad. You're right, but now you just need to let things relax, take a shower and talk to him Saturday."
I sniffle and climb off her lap.
"Ok. I think I'll take you up on that shower."
I feel icky.
"Ok. Love you."
"Love you mommy."