Bruce had to admit, he cheated in the drinking contest. But he couldn't risk losing control of his words and actions around Two-Face and Joker. Those two had really put their whole heart and soul into it, but then they were men who liked to win their challenges, thought Bruce as he sat in the back of the limo much later. Two-Face had passed out and was leaning against the door – Poison Ivy had fallen asleep against the other door. The Joker sat across from Bruce, still conscious but incredibly drunk, with his arm around Harley, who had fallen asleep curled up against his chest.
"You know what, Bruce?" muttered Joker. "For a Rich Boy, you're all right."
"Thank you," said Bruce, nodding at him.
"Surprised you're still conscious, actually," said Joker. "There ain't many guys who can drink that much and not pass out. Clearly Harvey was the lightweight outta the two of you," he muttered, glaring contemptuously at him.
Bruce shrugged. "Maybe he's outta practice. This is my life, after all. Night after night of drinking, dancing, and partying. A never-ending series of fun."
Joker laughed. "Y'know, we're more alike than you think, you and I," he said, grinning at him. "Both guys who just wanna spend our nights having a little fun. Except you ain't got some flying rodent getting in the way of yours."
He started coughing, and Bruce was afraid he was going to vomit, but he held it together, leaning back again. "Just thinking about him makes me wanna puke," he chuckled. "Nah, I'm kidding, I love the guy, really," he muttered, waving his hand. "Y'see, that's the difference between you and me, Brucie. You ain't got no purpose. I got a purpose. I got Bats."
"Batman is…your purpose?" asked Bruce, slowly.
"Sure," said Joker, shrugging. "Doncha get it? It's a great gag, Brucie!" he chuckled. "I live my life trying to kill another guy. But see, I love this guy. He's my nemesis, but I love him. I dunno what I'd do without him. He makes the nights fun, he gives me a challenge, and he's got a really cool cape. Swoosh!" he said, throwing up his arm. "That's the noise it makes. It's just kinda cool."
He gazed into the middle distance for a moment, and Bruce wondered if he was going to pass out - he certainly looked a little out of it, but then that wasn't that unusual for the Joker. "But see, I gotta kill him, Brucie," murmured Joker. "I gotta kill Batsy. That's my purpose. That's what I try to do night after night. But then if I do kill him, if I succeed, if I accomplish what I'm meant to accomplish, then I ain't got no purpose no more. Then my life is just one big empty stretch of nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Kinda funny when you think about it, isn't it? Don't it make you wanna laugh?"
He did laugh. Harley murmured in her sleep and cuddled up closer to him. "That's the gag, Brucie," he murmured. "That's the bitter jest of fate. The day I win is gonna be the worst day of my life. Ain't that a good joke?"
"Well, I guess it's a good thing you'll never win, Joker," murmured Bruce.
Joker stared at him. "We ain't…ever hung out like this before, have we, Brucie?" he murmured.
"No," replied Bruce.
"Cause there's just something really familiar about you," he murmured, shutting his eyes and furrowing his brow. "I can't put my finger on it, but just now and…earlier tonight, you…reminded me of somebody. But I just can't think who. Somebody…else…"
He trailed off and opened his eyes again, and then suddenly smiled. "Got it," he murmured. "You remind me of Bats, Brucie!"
"Oh…yeah?" stammered Bruce, his heart suddenly chilling in fear.
"Yeah," laughed Joker. "There's something distinctly Bat-like about you. I dunno how to describe it exactly, but…I'll tell him when I next see him. Bruce Wayne reminds me a little of you, Batsy," he chuckled.
He leaned back, shutting his eyes again. "Shame he couldn't be here tonight," he murmured. "Would've been fun, sharing a drink with my nemesis. Guess you're the closest I got, though. I ain't complaining. You're all right, Brucie, for a Rich Boy. You're all…right…"
He dropped off to sleep. Bruce stared at him for a moment and then shut his own eyes. "And miraculously, in certain rare moments, so are you, Joker," he murmured.