Disclaimer: I don't own Divergent
Tris POV
I say goodbye to Four when class ends, and before I know it I am walking into Spanish. "Tris!" Christina says as she waves me over. Marlene is in class again today.
"So…" Christina starts as I sit down.
"What?" I ask. I have absolutely no clue what she is referring too.
She and Marlene exchange a look and then Marlene says, "Well, tell us about Four."
"There's nothing to tell, seriously," I say, brushing them off. I don't know why they're making this all such a big deal.
"I don't believe that for a second, Tris. There's definitely something going on between you two," Christina says.
"Look, he's one of my best friends, I can't afford to have any further feelings for him," I say, and it's true. Every time I thought about us being together the past few days, I always push the feelings aside immediately.
"What does that even mean?" Marlene asks. I look to Christina for help.
"Tris, you can't do that anymore, you promised," she says.
"But, it's not that simple, ok?" I say.
"What's not simple?" Marlene asks.
"He could never like me when he finds out!" I nearly shout at Christina.
"You can't let that hold you back!" Christina responds in equal tone.
"Wait, what is this about?" Marlene asks, confused.
I look down, and say, "I don't want to talk about it."
"You have to at least try," Christina says, trying to persuade me.
I can't take it anymore. "Look, I don't know what you two are doing. Everyone has been acting weird around me since I got here, and I don't know why. And you two are so insistent, so adamant about this, I don't understand," I say, trying to control my anger.
"We're just trying to help you," Marlene says, attempting to calm me down.
That's when it all falls together. Of course, now I know why they've been so strange and secretive, they are all conspiring to get Four and I together.
"I'm not going to the party tonight," I say, changing the subject. Or so they think, they must've had something planned and I probably just messed it all up.
"Wait, what! Why?" Christina nearly explodes.
"You have to come, Tris!" Marlene pleads.
I shrug, and say, "Nah." It's fun to mess with them.
"But why?" Christina asks. She is still freaking out.
"I'm not really a party person," I explain. I'm not lying, it's true.
"Just… think about it," Marlene says with a sigh. She and Christina exchange a look, and I know that I have been successful.
It's not that I don't want to be with Four, that's not the problem. I could spend hours with him, just talking and staring into his gorgeous blue eyes and- no, stop it Tris! I don't care what Christina says, there is no way in the world he could like me after he finds out, it isn't even a possibility. I need to continue to push away whatever feelings I have for him.
The bell rings, and I walk with Christina to Chemistry. Four is already there, he smiles when I walk in and sit down. I begin to feel nervous for some reason, I don't know.
Is this "plan" completely the girls? I don't know. Is Four in on it too? I don't know, but now I am suspicious of everyone.
"Are you okay, Tris?" Four asks me. His eyes are filled with concern, he must've noticed that I am a bit on edge.
"I don't know," I reply honestly. I can't lie to Four, I have a hundred emotions running through me and I don't know what to think, I don't know what to do.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Four suggests. I know he is just trying to help, just being a good friend. That's what I keep telling myself.
"I-I can't," I stutter out. I can't tell him what I know, it's all about him. I'd admit that I do have feelings for him too, I would have to explain why we can't be together. I can't to that yet, he still doesn't know. Christina is staring at us intently throughout the whole encounter.
"You know you can tell me anything, right Tris?" Four asks. I stiffen; that's the same thing that Christina said to me yesterday.
"Trust me, you don't want to know," I say, smiling to reassure him. Four still looks worried about me, but slowly lets it go.
Class goes at a snail's pace, it's really annoying. It all just gives me more time to think, and I don't want to think about it. Why does everything have to be so complicated?
Christina pulls me aside after class before we can reach the cafeteria. "What's up with you, Tris?" she asks.
"I'm not an idiot, Christina," I state.
"What are you talking about?" she asks, growing nervous.
"You know exactly what I'm talking about, Christina! I know exactly what you're trying to do, and I don't appreciate it," I say.
Her face changes with realization, and she says, "I'm sorry Tris, I'm just trying to do what's best for you."
I exhale, and say, "Look, I don't want to be mad at you, but I want you to stop meddling and trying to set me up."
"Fine," Christina says reluctantly.
We walk into the cafeteria, I get my lunch and don't say anything for the rest of the period.
Four POV
I see Tris next in Chemistry, I've found myself looking forward to that class immensely every day, although I don't have a particular interest in the actual content. The class means that distance between Tris and I is cut down to the point where I get to sit next to her for 45 minutes straight. I cherish it.
Tris walks into the room, and my face becomes a smile. It is only when she sits down next to me that I get a good look at her face, at her eyes. She looks conflicted about something.
"Are you okay, Tris," I ask her. I'm worried about her, I hate seeing her like this.
"I don't know," she says. There really must be something bothering her.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask. Maybe I can help her, even if I'm just ears it might make her feel better.
"I-I can't," Tris says nervously. This confuses me, what could it be about?
"You know you can tell me anything, right Tris?" I tell her, and it's true. I want her to be comfortable enough to tell me anything, how could she ever like me if she can't trust me?
It's as if her mood completely flips, because she smiles and says, "Trust me, you don't want to know."
I nod slowly, I know that there is still something bothering her. I decide to let it go, I do have to respect her privacy. If she doesn't want to tell me, then she doesn't have to.
At the end of the class period, I walk to the cafeteria. Christina pulls Tris away again. A part of me is hurt and upset, but another part of me is happy for Tris to finally have a good friend.
I sit down, and soon after Christina marches up to our table. "She knows," she says.
"What?" Zeke asks.
"Tris, she knows, she found out about everything," Christina explains. I don't know what to think, I don't know what to feel. What does this mean?
"She wants us to stop trying to set her up, I don't think she understands," Christina continues. At this, my heart literally feels like it has been dropped onto the floor and shattered into a million pieces.
"I keep trying to tell her that it doesn't matter," she says, "But Tris keeps insisting that no one can like her, everything will change if you find out."
"What?" Shauna asks, confused.
"Four knows what I'm talking about," Christina says. I do, she thinks that I won't like her because of her past, and everything she's been through. She doesn't even realize that it all makes her even stronger. I guess that doesn't really mean that she doesn't like me then, she just thinks that she can't. No wonder she looked so conflicted.
"I get it, I understand. I know what to do," I say. I have a plan now, I need to make sure that she knows that I like her so much it hurts, that nothing can change how I feel about her after she tells me the rest of her story tomorrow.
Everyone nods in response, and that's when Tris gets to the table. I spend the entire period thinking about her.
It doesn't matter, nothing that she could say would matter. The past is just that, in the past. No matter what, Tris needs to know that it is okay to put everything that has happened behind her, and continue to move forward.
And I'll be there for her, every step along the way.