Disclaimer: I don't own Divergent
Quick A/N: I changed the format of my story, instead of two chapters of the same events in different point of views, they are just combined into longer chapters now, does that make sense? Each chapter now has a Tris and a Tobias POV, it keeps the story from getting too long and from my computer holding too many extra documents :) I think it works out better like this, let me know what you think of the new format in a review. Sorry if there was any confusion :(
Tris POV
"Tris!" Christina shouts from across the hallway the next morning before homeroom. I had not enjoyed getting up this morning, the fact that it is Monday doesn't help.
Christina walks over to my locker where I currently am, and asks, "Where's your man?"
"Christina!" I exclaim, and smack her.
"What!" she shouts back in the same tone.
"I don't know where he is," I say. I haven't talked to Tobias since our date last night, and I don't really feel the need to go and find him right now. I've always despised those girls that just hang over their boyfriend all of the time, it's gross.
"How was your date?" Christina asks, wiggling her eyebrows.
I roll my eyes, and say, "Fine." I am definitely not in the mood to elaborate.
"Okay, I won't demand details of your makeout session," Christina says with a wink.
I feel my face turning red, and mutter, "We weren't making out."
"Sure," Christina says, drawing out the u. She must be suspicious of me, for exactly what, I don't know.
"Seriously Christina," I say, trying to get her to shut up. I'm not exactly the most fond of public affection, it's cute and all but it reminds me of all the times that Robert and Al tried to force themselves onto me. We were in a public place, and no one did anything about it despite my cries for help.
"Ok, ok…" Christina starts, but then Marlene comes up to us.
"Hey guys!" she says enthusiastically.
"Hey," I say, not quite as happily. How can she be so cheery and awake at this hour?
"Woah, what's with her this morning?" Marlene asks Christina.
"I don't know, she won't say," Christina says.
"I'm fine guys, really," I say. I don't know why they suspect something of me, nothing happened. It was just a rough morning, it happens to everyone.
"Okay, well we need to get to homeroom," Christina says.
"Okay, bye guys," Marlene says, and then heads in the opposite direction as us.
As we walk, Christina asks, "Are you sure nothing's up? You seem off."
"I'm fine," I say as we walk into the classroom.
Tobias is already sitting down when we arrive, and I walk over to him. "Hi T-Four," I say, not wanting to mention his real name in front of Christina.
He smiles so wide when he sees me and says, "Good morning, Tris."
"Aw, you two are so cute together!" Christina squeals as she sits down. I glare at her, gosh she is such a girl sometimes.
I look over at Tobias, and his entire demeanor has changed. No longer is he all smiles, but is now looking down, and I can tell that he is a bit sad and confused. I wonder why?
"Are you okay?" I ask him.
"I'm fine, Tris," he snaps at me, my name sounding like venom. I am taken aback, he has never spoken this way to me before. I narrow my eyes at him, but realize that he might've just had a bad morning too, so I turn to my drawing.
I fine-tune some last few details before handing it in to Tori. The drawing isn't due until this Friday, but I had worked on it over the weekend and as a result, finished early. "This looks great, Tris," Tori says when I hand it to her, "You can have a free period for the rest of the week, draw whatever you want."
I take out a new sheet of paper, and draw whatever comes to mind. They're just little sketches, but by the end of the period, I manage to draw a pair of vultures perched on a branch, scouting out food.
The bell rings, and I wait for Tobias before heading off to our next class. We usually aren't silent around each other, but for some reason, today I can't find words to say to him. He doesn't even look at me, his head set straight forward the entire walk. Something must be bothering him, I should ask later. A small voice in the back of my mind is nagging, wondering whether Idid something, but I dismiss it.
We walk into the classroom, and Shauna is already sitting in the back of the room. We walk over to sit down, and I can tell that Shauna is about to greet us when she sees the expression on Tobias's face. She looks between the two of us, then raises her eyebrows at me, as if asking, "What's up with him?"
I shrug my shoulders, telling her, "I don't know."
Class passes by quickly, and every so often I steal glances at Tobias. He seems entirely focused on class, which is odd considering how many times last week Christina told me that all he did was stare at me.
Calculus passes slowly as always, and soon I walk into Spanish. Christina and Marlene are already there, so I sit down by them. They are looking at me, as if waiting for an answer, so I ask, "What?"
"Do you know what's up with Four?" Christina asks me.
I sigh, and say, "No, I don't. He's been acting off since this morning, I don't know why. I've never seen him like this before."
Christina and Marlene exchange a glance, and Marlene says, "I saw him in third period, and it reminds me of…"
"Of what?" I ask her, she didn't finish her statement.
"The old Four," Christina finishes.
"What?" I ask.
"He never smiled before you came here, he was always secluded and distant," she says.
"That's how he is today…" I say, trying to think of why this would happen. It must be something I did, but what did I do wrong? I exchanged two sentences with him this morning before he shut me out.
"Do you know what happened?" Christina asks me.
"No," I say, suddenly feeling distant myself. I'm getting lost in thought, waves of what-ifs crashing over me and I'm finding it hard to resurface. Tobias is all I think about for the entire class, what could I've done?
When class ends, Christina and I walk to Chemistry, and I can't stop thinking about how I am about to see him. How do you talk to someone who is mad at you? Is he even mad? My mind is scattered, thoughts pulling me into different directions.
I walk into the classroom, and Tobias is already sitting down. I sit down next to him, and he doesn't even look up at me. "Four," I say, trying to get his attention. He doesn't respond.
I lean in and whisper into his ear, "Tobias." At this, he glances over at me but looks back immediately. Now I'm starting to get annoyed
"Why are you ignoring me?" I ask him, and again, no answer.
"Look, I don't know why you aren't answering me, and I don't know why you're acting like this, and I'm not going to pretend to know what you're thinking. Listen, I don't want to be mad at you but you are acting like a bit of a jerk right now, and you're shutting me out for no reason. I just need you to talk to me and realize that as your girlfriend, I am trying to help you because I care about you. You don't have to tell me now if you don't want to, but tell me when it kicks in, okay?" I say.
"All the voices in my mind," he says. I smile, realizing where he's getting this from.
I take his hand and squeeze it, saying, "Calling out across the line."
A/N: They are quoting Bloodstream by Ed Sheeran
Class starts, and I can't help but feel somewhat better about the current situation. He might, no, is probably still mad about me, and I still don't know the reason, but at least he can have a sense of humor.
Tobias POV
"What's up, man?" Zeke asks me when I walk into school the next day.
"Not much," I say with a shrug, "Where's Shauna?"
"She texted me, her and Lynn are running late," he explains.
"I see," I say.
"How's Tris?" he asks.
I sigh, I've been thinking about it and I have no clue. "I don't know," I say, "I'm no good with girls, I honestly don't understand the signals she's sending me."
"What happened?" Zeke asks.
"I don't know, I might just be paranoid. She didn't finish some song lyrics, and I don't know why because it's just a game we play with each other and it's driving me insane," I say.
"I think you're over thinking it dude," he says truthfully.
"But am I? I can't really be sure. The lyrics would've had her say that she loves me," I reason.
"Dude, you've known her for less than a week. I doubt she's ready for that yet," he says.
"I know, but what if she is having second thoughts?" I ask.
"It could be possible, but she'd send more signals. Girls do that sort of stuff," Zeke says.
I groan. "Why do girls have to be so difficult to understand?" I ask.
"I don't know dude, just watch for some signs and then talk to me, okay? I have to head to homeroom," he says.
"Okay, see you later," I say, then walk to Tori's class.
I sit down when I walk into her room, and wait for Tris. When she walks in, she says, "Hi T-Four," and just hearing her voice completely brightens my day. I smile bigger than I thought possible.
"Good morning, Tris," I say.
"Aw, you two are so cute together!" Christina exclaims.
I look at Tris lovingly, but she is shooting a glare at Christina. Is that the signal? It must be, it has to be. She must not like me, she must regret kissing me, she must regret everything. I find myself wanting to run out of the room, but I just look down, sad and disappointed. What did I do wrong? Is Zeke right, am I going too fast, is that why?
"Are you okay?" she asks me, and I don't even want to look up at her.
"I'm fine, Tris," I snap, and I automatically wish I hadn't. If she had even the slightest feelings for me, they must be gone now. But she doesn't look angry, she just looks surprised, and focuses on her work for the duration of the class. I focus on mine, I don't look at her.
I don't look at her in the hallway, I don't look at her during Government. I feel myself transforming back into Four, the isolated jock with walls built up. I try to push her out of my mind the whole day, and it all comes back when I see her in Chemistry. She walks in, but I don't look up.
"Four," she says. I don't answer.
Tris leans in, and for a millisecond, I think she is about to kiss me, but she whispers in my ear, "Tobias." No, she can't use my real name. She doesn't even like me.
"Why are you ignoring me?" she asks. It's because you hate me, you regret being with me and I'm really upset about it but I am hiding under a mask, it's all an act because I can't show my true feelings. I don't say that, although that is what I think. I remain silent.
"Look," Tris starts, "I don't know why you aren't answering me, and I don't know why you're acting like this, and I'm not going to pretend to know what you're thinking. Listen, I don't want to be mad at you but you are acting like a bit of a jerk right now, and you're shutting me out for no reason. I just need you to talk to me and realize that as your girlfriend, I am trying to help you because I care about you. You don't have to tell me now if you don't want to, but tell me when it kicks in, okay?"
Then it hits me; how could I be so stupid? I didn't even know anything for sure, and I freaked out and shut down all feelings. It wasn't a sign, it meant nothing, and she's probably the one that should be upset because I haven't looked at her all day. I feel terrible, absolutely terrible, I am an awful boyfriend. I am about to apologize for everything, everything, but then I remember, "All the voices in my mind." I wasn't about to let that one go.
Tris smiles, hopefully that means she's not mad, and says, "Calling out across the line." She takes my hand and squeezes it, does she forgive me?
I spend the entire period thinking about how I can make it up to her, I was so brainless. The walls I had built up slowly start to fade away once more, Tris is mine and all class period I don't deny myself the pleasure of looking at her.