Disclaimer: I don't own Divergent
Tris POV
I look up to be met with the deep blue eyes that I have become so familiar with. Any other time I would be so happy to be met with them, but right now I just want to be alone. I look back down as he sits down next to me.
"Tris, talk to me," Tobias pleads.
"I don't know what to say," I reply, choking back tears. I will not cry.
He sighs, and wraps his arm around me, pulling me into a hug. I hug back because I didn't realize how nice it would be to have someone there. Someone who actually cares.
"I'm sorry," I say, trying to pull myself together.
"You have nothing to be sorry for," Tobias says, "They were being inconsiderate."
"But I feel like it's my fault," I say.
"It's not your fault," he replies quickly.
"I should've told them," I say.
"You don't have to tell them, Tris," Tobias says, "Everyone has their secrets, and after that, they don't really deserve to know."
"I just feel like-like they will look at me differently, they won't want to be friends if they know," I explain.
"That's what you thought when you told Christina, and when you told me, but nothing changed," Tobias reasons.
"Then I'll break down and cry and they'll think I'm weak because no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to let go of what has happened," I say.
"You, weak? Tris, you're the strongest person I know," he says.
"No, no, I'm not. I'm weak, I'm undesirable, I" I start.
"You have to stop thinking like that, Tris. You put yourself down for no reason at all, you don't even see all of the wonderful things about you," Tobias says.
"Anything good is overshadowed by all of the bad," I say glumly.
"That's not true, sunlight still manages to make its way through on a cloudy day," he says. God, he always knows exactly what to say.
"I'm sorry you have to deal with me when I'm like this," I say.
"I don't mind, no, I don't mind it," he says.
I smirk, and say, "I would come back 1000 times, but nice try."
A/N: They are quoting 1000 Times by Sara Bareilles (great song, btw)
"I thought I had you for a second," Tobias says, smiling also.
"Nope, you can't win," I say with my grin growing wider.
"I wouldn't want it any other way," Tobias says, leaning over to whisper in my ear.
I look up at him, and get mesmerized by his enchanting deep blue eyes. I used to think that they were mysterious under hidden secrets, but now they feel warm and spine chilling at the same time.
"I could live by the light in your eyes," I say.
"You are everything to me, you know," he says, and I smile slightly. He missed it.
"I'll unfold before what I've strung together," I continue, and his face contorts in realization.
"The very first words of a life long love letter," he finishes.
A/N: I Choose You by Sara Bareilles, sorry I'm listening to The Blessed Unrest album while writing this :P
I look up at him, shocked. Is he saying what I think he is trying to say. Do I feel the same way, do I love him? I haven't given it much thought, any at all actually. But now, in this moment, I couldn't imagine life without him.
I decide to continue the song, speaking in almost a whisper, "Tell the world that we finally got it all right."
His next words surprise me, "I love you, Tris." I stare at him for a second, trying to comprehend that he is speaking them to me. The three words, eight letters repeat in my head for a while and I don't know what to say.
"I-I fall deeper in love with you every single day. I can't stand when we are apart, I am the happiest when we are together. I can't stop thinking about you. I'm sorry, I love everything you hate about yourself. I wish we traded eyes for one day, so you could see how beautiful you are to me. Every time I look at you, I fall in love with you all over again. You are my everything, you are my sun, my moon, and all my stars, and I am hopelessly, desperately in love with you," he says.
At this point, the tears have come silently, but they are the type of tears that I never thought I would encounter. They are the tears that come when you walk into a surprise party, the tears on your wedding day. These tears are happy.
I realize in this moment, how much I care. Neither of us our perfect, but we are perfect together, and I wouldn't want it any other way.
There are a million words on my tongue, waiting to be spoken, but in the moment I am speechless. His soliloquy had touched me in ways I thought impossible, but words can impact us in ways we can never fully believe. He's not faultless, no one is, but he is all that I want.
"You are the silver lining in a world full of darkness," I say when I finally have the sense to speak, "You-you are my world, and I would be lying if I said that this doesn't scare me, but sometimes following your heart means losing your mind, and you make me crazy." He smiles at this, so warm, so sincere.
"With you, the world doesn't seem so bad, and I can't explain these things I feel for you, but I can only conclude that it means I love you too," I say.
"You are my one in seven billion, the entire universe conspired to help me find you," Tobias says.
We are sitting next to each other, his arms around me, but I can't stand the space between us. It hurts in ways unimaginable, I want to be next to him and with him and never have to say goodbye but the thought is terrifying and amazing all at the same time.
I lean closer, our foreheads now touching and our lips millimeters apart. We stay there for a few seconds, breathing the same air. His breath becomes labored; I didn't know I had such an effect on him.
"Seriously, just kiss me," I say after who knows how long, and he gladly obliges. His lips brush mine gently, and that same feeling runs through me, the excitement and electricity sparking something within me. I kiss him more passionately, my hands now on the back of his neck.
He returns with the same love, warm and comforting. The kiss eventually deepens, and I don't pull back. I am afraid, so afraid but I can't let that stop me.
I pull back in time, and melt into his arms. I could live in this moment forever.
Tobias POV
Tris looks up, her eyes meeting mine. They are more grey than blue in this light, stormy and unpredictable. I sit down next to her, but she doesn't say anything. I hate seeing her like this.
"Tris, talk to me," I say finally.
"I don't know what to say," she says.
I sigh, and pull her into a hug. She returns it, and the contact makes me giddy. I have to hide it, ignore it, I have to be there for her right now.
"I'm sorry," she says.
"You have nothing to be sorry for," I say, "They were being inconsiderate."
"But I feel like it's my fault," Tris says.
"It's not your fault," I assure her, but I can tell that she doesn't believe me.
"I should've told them," I say.
"You don't have to tell them, Tris," I say, "Everyone has their secrets, and after that, they don't really deserve to know." They don't, they really don't after how they treated Tris. I am still so angry at them, but I am putting it to the side until later.
"I just feel like-like they will look at me differently, they won't want to be friends if they know," she says, and my heart breaks when I hear those words come out of her mouth because it doesn't matter.
"That's what you thought when you told Christina, and when you told me, but nothing changed," I say.
"Then I'll break down and cry and they'll think I'm weak because no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to let go of what has happened," Tris says, she is so stubborn, and so wrong.
"You, weak? Tris, you're the strongest person I know," I tell her.
She looks up at me in shock, and says, "No, no, I'm not. I'm weak, I'm undesirable, I"
"You have to stop thinking like that, Tris. You put yourself down for no reason at all, you don't even see all of the wonderful things about you," I say. She always had a way with her brokenness. She would take her pieces and make them beautiful.
"Anything good is overshadowed by all of the bad," she says, convincing herself of things that aren't true.
"That's not true, sunlight still manages to make its way through on a cloudy day," I say. It sounded poetic in my head, but out loud it sounds pretty cheesy.
"I'm sorry you have to deal with me when I'm like this," she says.
"I don't mind, no, I don't mind it," I say, trying to lighten the mood.
"I would come back 1000 times, but nice try," she says, smiling. I haven't gotten her yet, but at least she is happier now than she was before.
"I thought I had you for a second," I say jokingly.
"Nope, you can't win," she says. I can't help but be happy because of how happy she looks. Her mood turned a complete 180, and I can only assume it is because of me.
"I wouldn't want it any other way," I whisper into her ear.
She looks me in the eye, her beautiful stormy eyes. I can't help but think about how much she has changed in just two weeks. She was like the moon, part of her was always hidden away. Now, she has opened up to me in ways unimaginable. I realize in this moment, everything I've been contemplating is silly; of course I love her.
"I could live by the light in your eyes," she says romantically.
"You are everything to me, you know," I say, and she smiles.
"I'll unfold before what I've strung together," she says, and I realize that it is from a song. She got me again, but I'm not the least bit upset about it. I'm lost in the moment, I need to tell her right now because I can't stand another minute of her not knowing how much she means to me.
"The very first words of a life long love letter," I say, hopefully that got her thinking. I want us to be forever.
She looks shocked, it must've conveyed what I was aiming for. She speaks in almost a whisper, "Tell the world that we finally got it all right."
Instead of saying "I choose you" as the song would suggest, it is so much more, and I decide that now is the time. "I love you, Tris," I say. She just stares at me, and it makes me nervous, but I relax when I look into her eyes again. It is as if they are reassuring me, so I go on.
"I-I fall deeper in love with you every single day. I can't stand when we are apart, I am the happiest when we are together. I can't stop thinking about you." It's so true, every word I say has been building up inside since we first met, and in a way hearing them in the air relieves me.
"I'm sorry, I love everything you hate about yourself. I wish we traded eyes for one day, so you could see how beautiful you are to me. Every time I look at you, I fall in love with you all over again. You are my everything, you are my sun, my moon, and all my stars, and I am hopelessly, desperately in love with you."
I said it; I can't believe I said it all. I wait for her to laugh, it is so cheesy but entirely true, and I don't care. I look at her, and from her gorgeous fall tears. For a second, I think that I made her upset, but then I realize that I made her unbelievable happy. She probably has never had those words spoken to her before, but she deserves to.
"You are the silver lining in a world full of darkness," she finally says, "You-you are my world, and I would be lying if I said that this doesn't scare me, but sometimes following your heart means losing your mind, and you make me crazy." I smile, love is madness.
"With you, the world doesn't seem so bad, and I can't explain these things I feel for you, but I can only conclude that it means I love you too," she says, and for a second I can't believe that she feels the same way about me.
Tris said it back, she loves me too.
We love each other.
"You are my one in seven billion, the entire universe conspired to help me find you," I say.
She suddenly leans in, and I think she is about to kiss me when she rests her forehead on mine. I don't know how to react, so I sit and anticipate the moment. My breathing becomes arduous, hopefully she doesn't notice. I have been waiting to kiss her all day, but every single time we collide is special.
"Seriously, just kiss me," she whispers, and I snap out of my daze and gladly meet her request. I kiss her gently at first, that is all we have ever done, but she pulls me closer with her hand on my neck, and it becomes more passionate, more than anything I've experienced before.
I hesitantly deepen the kiss, this is the point where Tris usually pulls back, but she continues at full force, and I am surprised yet overjoyed at the same time. It cannot be put into words.
Tris pulls back after some time, and a part of me is disappointed, but I can understand that she doesn't want a full out makeout session in the middle of the park. She leans back into me, I wrap my arms around her and we sit there looking at the night sky.
A/N: Not going to lie, this might be my favorite chapter I've written. It was just fun pulling quotes from different places, I hope it didn't sound too cheesy or cliché. Leave a review, let me know where you want this story to go next!