Epilogue- Years later
Time passes. There are good days. There are bad days. After six months I manage to endure the victory tour. I fulfil my third promise to Fern, both crushed by how her death has devastated her family and a little gratified that they don't blame me at all, but thank me for all I did for her.
Returning to district 8 I try to work out what my future holds, but only come up with the last horror of the Games that lies in my future and not my past- mentoring future district 8 tributes. The Capitol will not allow me a job, so I spend a lot time with nothing to do, which isn't good for my mental state. Neither are the 50th Hunger Games. The twist of the Quarter Quell is that twice as many tributes are reaped, so Woof and I each mentor two tributes. Mine especially will be forever imprinted in my mind. A tough but pleasant sixteen year-old boy called Gray, who I think might have just half a chance is killed in the bloodbath, while the girl, a sweet little thirteen year-old called Elise, manages to escape initially, only to die later on the first day, stabbed through the eyes by a plant muttation.
I sink into a depression after that, but Woof, Kay, mum and dad eventually get me out of it. The next six years after that are the hardest, still struggling yearly with my tributes being killed, none getting close to winning, always filled with the fear Kay will be reaped. But when the reaping passes her by a weight is lifted, on her and my parents too.
Woof turns out to be right. It's a slow process but the pain starts to ease. I find myself able to feel less guilty about Shayla, remember Fern happily, concentrating all my negative thoughts to the Capitol.
I try to move on from Fern, as she wanted, but never manage it. I never marry or have a family of my own. But Kay does, her husband Matthias becomes a good friend of mine, while my little niece, Layla and later nephew, Coady become the main reason for my smiles. I never recover fully, how could I? There are bouts of depression, nightmares, fits of anger and guilt, but I always come back from them. I never turn to alcohol and manage to find ways to occupy my time to keep myself distracted. After drawing, writing and carving fail I fall into old ways, practising with my staff a lot, but that ends when I become unable to stop seeing myself killing Jeremiah. Eventually I find my peace in craftsmanship. I make everything we need and more we don't, all from scratch, which takes plenty of time, which is great. I make cots for Layla and Coady, toys for them, clothes for everyone, household items to replace or duplicate everything that came with the house.
One day, years and years later. Just before my thirtieth birthday in fact, I suddenly realise that I have kept my final promise to Fern and allow myself a little smile. Life goes on as long as you are alive, it's the job of the living to make it worthwhile. Because otherwise, what have we got?
Rory Jordan was killed in the Victor's Purge after the 75th Hunger Games. His parents had already died of natural causes. He was survived by his sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew.
Rory Jordan
Victor of the 49th Hunger Games.
Loving brother, son and uncle.
R.I.P.