In chapter 16 Bella spent the night with Edward, went for a run in the park and was attacked by James, and learned the truth about vampires from Carlisle. Initially a little fearful, she finally let Edward comfort her.

When I awoke some time later, it was light, but the curtains were drawn in the bedroom. My mind swam with the cloudy dregs of slumber, and my face felt puffy and hot. I let my eyes flutter open and relived the moments from last night wondering if it had been a dream. After I had taken Edward's hand, we laid together in the silence for some time. His cool fingers had caressed mine softly, divulging an underlying heat simmering under the surface of words left unsaid and in flashes of heated, passionate memories from several nights before. I had confessed how tired I was even as the room was growing lighter, and Edward encouraged me to sleep, promising to watch over me.

I swallowed thickly and took in the gold bedroom again, remembering I was at the Cullen house and this was not a dream at all. I remained bundled up in the blankets and the silence for several minutes, waking slowly until I spied Edward in my peripheral. I jumped slightly, startled to find him in the in the darkest corner of the room, sitting on a chair, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees.

"Good afternoon," he breathed. His voice was hesitant, and his gold eyes were wide and cautious, afraid of scaring me.

"Hi," I replied, my own voice thick with sleep.

His eyes quickly shifted to the alcove behind the door—the last place I remember being. "I'm sorry. I couldn't bear to see you sleeping on the floor. I moved you to my bed."

I finally had some little tidbit of information about where I was. I felt a comfort in knowing I was in Edward's space, but I felt bad for putting him out.

"Thank you," I issued, rolling onto my side to face him, folding my hands under my head. "I feel bad for stealing your bed. Don't you need to…?"

I paused. Weren't vampires supposed to sleep in coffins or something all night?

He smiled gently, and I seriously doubted his inability to read my thoughts for a moment. "No. I don't sleep at all."

"Oh," I said stupidly. "So are you not a… um… traditional vampire then?"

He smiled a little more genuinely. "There's nothing traditional about me, Bella."

I had no real idea what that meant. I only had stereotypes to go on. "What about garlic, reflections in mirrors, and stakes through the heart?"

"Those are all myths too."

I filed all this info into the 'These-things-are-too-fucked-up-to-think-about' box. I was quickly confused again. If all these stereotypes were myths, how did the stories get started in the first place? Carlisle mentioned hunting animals, is that how vampires… ate? I thought they drank blood. Wasn't that an essential part of being a vampire? "Why you didn't eat breakfast at my apartment Sunday morning? I mean, if all these stories are myths. What do you eat?"

He stared at me for a long moment, gauging my reaction. He was right to. I wasn't sure I wanted to hear his answer. "Your heart is beating too fast. Try to calm down. I promise, I've only had animal blood for longer than you've been alive. I don't eat human food."

The double entendre of his statement wasn't lost on me. I was only mildly relieved to hear him admit it. I was now hung up on another new revelation.

"You can hear my heart over there?" I asked, stunned.

"Every beat," he answered, looking directly in my eyes. "I could probably hear it out on the highway, and Saturday night I picked your rhythm out of the crowded ballroom too. I can smell every response of your body as well."

I mentally cringed as I thought back to every time I'd needed a panty change in his presence and fought down the urge to simply throw him down and molest him. Ugh, I was going to have to exercise supreme control of myself every time I was around him.

We were silent then, but he never ceased his observation of me. I stretched again, raising my hands above my head, pushing against the pillows. "Can I get up for a while? I'm tired of lying here."

He rose from the chair and slowly came around to the other side of the bed. "Please let me help? Carlisle said you'll probably feel weak for a couple days. You need to start eating and drinking on your own or the IV goes back in. Are you hungry, thirsty?"

"Not right now. I could go for a human minute though? And then maybe is it nice enough to step outside? I'd like some fresh air." I gestured outside to the wrap-around patio behind the drawn curtain.

"Okay," he relented, shyly extending a hand to me. He smiled gently, cautiously, all the hope in the world hiding in those shimmering gold eyes.

I tossed the heavy covers back and carefully sat up, not wanting to get lightheaded and end up back in the confines of the bed. I took Edward's hand and returned his smile. I stood up on shaky legs like a newborn fawn, timid, wanting to be ever-nearer to someone I trusted.

Lacing my fingers through Edward's, I slowly shuffled around the end of the bed and let him lead me to the en-suite bathroom. It was horribly embarrassing to know he was outside the door and able to hear everything, but when you've gotta go, you've gotta go. They had been kind enough to leave out some toiletries, for which I was grateful. I brushed my teeth and hair, and finally I took a moment to splash some cold water on my face. It helped to clear away some of the cobwebs from my mind. Only hours ago I learned the man I'd slept with was a vampire, but the more I thought about it, the less it seemed to matter. We had forged a connection upon our first meeting. Before a word had ever been exchanged between us, his smile had captured my heart. Although I didn't fully understand the world he was a part of, it didn't change the fact of who Edward was. I felt safe, happy, and cared for in his presence, and even now that I knew the truth about him, I wanted to be with him. There would be more truths to reveal but I wanted to hear him out. I had been angry last night, but much of my anger was because I had been lied to. I felt silly and worried that my feelings were unreturned by an entity that I didn't understand. Yes, I jumped to horrible conclusions about Edward, but the fear was only a small part of what I felt. As long as he continued to be forthcoming, I would hold out a hesitant hope that our feelings for one another were valid despite what we were.

Edward was waiting outside the door with the chenille throw blanket from the foot of the bed tossed over his outstretched arm.

"There's one more thing I have to tell you," he admitted, his eyes sliding toward the curtain over the window as we shuffled slowly toward the French doors.

"What now?" I teased. "Will you turn into a bat? Evaporate into a puff of smoke?"

He picked up on my tone and the corner of his mouth hitched up into a sly smirk. "No, those myths are busted too, but I might sparkle a little in the sunlight."

Perhaps it should have been the most absurd thing he'd told me, but my mind quickly pulled three memories from the 'These-are-too-fucked-up-to-think-about' box. I remembered the mylar balloon caught in the tree in Forks, which sparked an even older memory—the vampire's skin shimmering the day on the boat. He'd sparkled Sunday too, when a shaft of light broke through the clouds. I looked back at Edward, imagining the faint glimmer over his own skin.

"I know," I answered. "I have some secrets too."

His eyes widened in surprise, but I turned away, grabbing the curtains and threw them back, letting the light flood in the gold bedroom.

The sky was slightly overcast in a faint shade of grey. I instantly looked down to see if the exposed skin on Edward's wrist where the sleeve of his shirt exposed his smooth forearm. It didn't sparkle per se, but it seemed luminescent, as though lit from within.

I hated to admit that it was cool, but it kind of was. And pretty.

I turned the doorknob and shambled out onto the oak deck. It was shockingly cold to my bare feet, making me remember the hard wood floors of the house in Forks before dad would get up and turn up the heat in the morning. I stood at the railing, my fingers curling over the edge, steadying myself. I turned my face toward the sky and took a deep breath, feeling the cool air rush into my lungs. I was about to thank Edward for bringing me out, but I felt weak suddenly. My knees began to tremble, and I felt dizzy.

"I think I need to—" I was about to say "sit down" when my feeble knees finally buckled, and I began to sink toward the decking. Edward reached out immediately, scooping me up into his arms.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, embarrassed by my lack of stamina. Where was the girl who ran 10k's?

"It's okay. Your sugar is just too low, and you took a shallow breath. Let's sit for a minute."

He carried me over to a row of teak Adirondack chairs along the length of the house near the doors. He placed me gently on the lounger and took the afghan from me, draping it across my lap. I was touched by his concern.

"Stay put, I'm going to get you something to eat."

Though there was a set of stairs at one end of the deck, Edward jumped over the side. I scooted quickly to the end of the chair, listening, waiting for some kind of landing. I remembered him making the unbelievable leap up and over the deck some time during the night and realized that despite assuring me that garlic couldn't harm him and that he didn't sleep in coffins, I realized he still had a few surprises up his sleeves. Maybe he was like Superman after all.

I gazed around the Cullen property while I waited for Edward to return. It was beautiful here, peaceful and removed enough from the city that one wouldn't know Rochester existed at all. The trees circled the manicured lawn, closing us off and causing me to shudder. The forest would take on a different feeling for a while, until I was brave enough to go back in.

I heard the sound of doors shutting on the main level of the house and, although I'd seen it before, I jumped when Edward vaulted over the second story railing. I clasped my hands over my heart, making an effort to keep my body calm. I had someone who could hear it when my body lost control now.

"I'm sorry," he issued, instantly slowing down, moving toward me at a more measured pace. "I wanted to hurry."

I ducked my head and bit my lip to avoid smiling as I took the proffered buttered toast and juice.

"Eat slowly. If it agrees with you, Carlisle said you could try some soup next."

Turning, I sat side-saddle on the long chair and took a small bite of the perfectly golden brown toast. It crunched noisily, and I wondered if it sounded like a jack hammer to him. I was about to ask, but when I looked up, he was standing there awkwardly, just staring.

"You're freaking me out. Sit down and relax or something." I eyed the empty space next to me and inclined my head, hinting he should take a seat. "I won't bite. Will you?"

He smirked a little and moved slowly toward the chair, easing himself into the open space next to me. "Only if you want me to, Detective."

Should I be turned on by a statement like that? And what happened to that pact that I made with my body not to get aroused around him anymore? I squeezed my thighs together and hoped he'd never know, but the way he licked his bottom lip told me he knew only too well.

"Um, is that how it works?" I asked, desperate to draw the attention away from the body that betrayed me. "The vampire thing, I mean?" I took a sip of juice and looked over the rim of the glass at him.

He swallowed. "Let's not worry about that. I'd much rather hear about why you know vampires sparkle in the sunlight."

And now it was time to share my big secret. I blew out a breath and felt the familiar panic rise up inside me at the thought of my father's death. I clenched my teeth and steeled myself to find some strength and resolve. "I, um, told you that I lost my father when I was little. We were out fishing in Forks. But what I didn't tell you was that it was a vampire that took his life right in front of me, and I have no doubt I was next."

I took a large bite of toast, more to have something to do than out of actual hunger. I chewed slowly, hoping Edward would speak. I was too scared to actually look over at him, but I knew he hadn't moved.

"It really wasn't that big of a surprise to me when your d—Dr. Cullen told me the truth about all of you. I was scared of course, because I'd seen firsthand what a vampire could do, and I knew I would be unable to put up a fight. I don't even think it that big of a surprise to see you race in to save me. That didn't upset me."

I slid my hand over and hooked my little finger around Edward's to let him know I wasn't against what he was. How could I be afraid of this man who seemed so willing to put my worth and care above his own?

"What upset you?" he asked suddenly, his voice a little lower, tenser.

I squeezed his finger and dropped my voice to a whisper. "The vampire I saw on Sunday—the man in the woods, James,—he was the one that killed my dad."

Edward jumped up and fisted his hair as he began pacing rapidly. I couldn't bear to watch him, the movement was too blurred. I stared down into the half-empty glass of orange juice.

"Are you sure, Bella?" he asked, dropping to his knees right in front of me. "Human memories are fragile, temporary, and able to be compromised."

Unshed tears glossed over my eyes as I looked up at him. "Yeah, I'm sure. Trust me, that man has haunted my dreams for almost twenty years. He's the reason I became a cop—I wanted to put away the man who ended my dad's life."

I set my juice and half-eaten toast down on the deck and quickly swiped at the hot tears cresting over my cheeks.

Edward stepped over the chair, straddling it as he sat down. His hand slipped around my shoulder, rubbing gently. "Bella, I'm so sorry," he whispered, leaning in to rest his forehead against my temple. His lips brushed against my ear, and I shivered involuntarily.

My body sagged and rested against the side of his, and he cradled my body close. "It's okay," he breathed.

I knew I should be scared, I knew I should resist and reject his touch, but I simply could not summon any will to push him away when the only thing I wanted to do was pull him closer. I nudged him toward the back of the chair and curled up within the safety of his arms.

He continued to rub my back in soothing circles and drew the afghan around my body. My fingers fisted the front of his shirt, and I closed my eyes, breathing him in.

Edward let me have my moment before he spoke again. "I'm sorry to make you relive memories you'd rather forget, but I need to know. What made the vampire leave you alive when you were a girl?"

I felt my face scrunch up as I remembered the great grey wolf that launched itself through the air and fought with the vampire. The growling and snarling had been so loud I'd pressed my hands over my ears to try and muffle the noise. I tried to tell Billy that day about the big animal, but he hadn't believed me. His simple and profound denial caused me to question myself, but I knew it was true.

"Don't laugh," I prefaced, unable to look at him. "It was a dog—a wolf. A huge one. I mean really huge, not simply larger than life in my memory because it rescued me. I'm not romanticizing my hero. It had to be as big as my mom's old mini-van. When it ran, it sounded like thunder. He scared that James guy off, and he seemed legitimately terrified." I drifted off in my memories for a moment before Edward rubbed my back again and brought me back to the present. "I was in a boat on a fast-moving river. I hid under the seat and floated downstream. I never saw it again."

We were quiet for some time; the only sounds were our breathing. My head still rested on Edward's chest, and I couldn't hear the familiar 'lub-dub' of a beating heart. I wondered if mine was loud enough for the both of us. I still had so many questions about the vampire thing. Was he alive? He existed, yes, or at least I hoped he wasn't some figment of my imagination. But there was no heartbeat thumping inside his chest. He breathed, but there were times since our meeting that I swore he wasn't. And then there was the most important thing, for me anyway. If Edward was over one hundred years old, could vampires die? Would he live forever? I couldn't lie, I loved the idea that he couldn't leave me behind. I'd been in that position before, and I had no intention of being deserted again.

When the silence became unbearable, I finally blurted out one of the questions that had been nagging away at me. "So, do you think I'm crazy?" My story seemed far-fetched to my rational mind, even more so admitting it out loud. Would he think the same?

He immediately started rubbing my shoulder again. "No, no. Just thinking. I thought all the worlds' werewolves had been hunted to extinction. There must be a pocket or two left. I'll have to ask Carlisle."

I shook my head slightly. "Naturally, there are werewolves too. What's next, witches, fairies?" I didn't wait for his answer. I don't think I really wanted to know. "At times it feels like my whole perception of the world has changed overnight and sometimes it seems like it's something I've always known."

He stroked my chin with the knuckle of his index finger and tilted my face up toward his. "I'm so sorry," he breathed, his mouth mere inches from mine. His sweet, cool breath fanned over my face, causing me to lean in even closer. "I know your understanding of this world is so new, and I keep exposing you to more and more of it, but I feel so comfortable around you, Bella. I've wanted to show you the real me for so long."

"Show me," I whispered against his lips.

His own lips were tentative at first, measured with control and pressing gently against mine. His hands slowly moved to tangle in my hair, and I hoped he would hold me fast to him. "Bella," he sighed, tearing his lips away from mine before kissing a path of closed-mouth kisses across the apple of my cheek to my temple. "You're too weak, too tired," he protested half-heartedly, continuing to nuzzle my cheek.

"Not that tired," I countered, shifting onto my stomach, my body stretched out the length of his. Nudging his nose with mine, I couldn't help but notice the ways his body was responding to mine. I could feel his increased respiration, and I could feel an even more obvious reaction below the belt. I had no idea what his intentions were, but his hands traveled down the length of my spine and smoothed past the waist of my pants causing me to squirm in anticipation. My tongue darted out to wet my lips moistening his inadvertently in the process. His reaction was immediate. He groaned softly before fusing his lips to mine as he palmed my ass.

I could feel his erection straining against the front of his jeans, and the pressure of his hands on my backside provided a wonderful tension as my hips pressed against his.

Tasting his icy-cool breath had me licking at the seam of his lips, begging for entrance and hoping to tempt him into taking things further. Caught up in his beauty, his passion, it was disturbingly easy to forget or ignore he was a vampire—one who had wanted to take my life only weeks ago; one who I had given myself to only a few nights before.

One I'd give myself to again in a heartbeat.

I tore my lips away from his with an audible pop and pushed against his chest to distance myself slightly, looking down at that beautiful mouth of his.

"Why don't you have fangs?" I blurted out, the thought suddenly jumping to the forefront of my mind. "Or do you?"

Edward froze, seemingly stunned. "Um, no. Is that really what you want to talk about right now?"

I watched as his mouth annunciated every sound, the way his teeth peaked out as he said certain words, waiting, almost expecting to see a flash of something jagged in those pearly whites.

"No," I admitted, leaning in slowly, prolonging the moment to press my lips to his once again. I kissed him until my lips were swollen, slightly sore, and chilled to the point where I had to stop my teeth from chattering. I was lightheaded again, and he pressed one final tight-lipped kiss to my cupid's bow before clutching my face between his hands.

"Enough. As much as I want more, you can't handle it."

I rested my head on his chest, panting.

"How are you feeling?" He wondered aloud, smoothing down my hair.

I sighed. Could I admit that I was far too keyed up and left with a serious case of blue ovaries? Never had dry humping seemed like such an amazing idea. I knew he wasn't asking about my sexual well-being, however.

"Um, okay, I guess. Tired, but I don't know why. I've been sleeping for days." I closed my eyes for a moment and nuzzled my cheek on the front of his shirt.

His hand stroking my hair was so soothing, so tender, so… perfect. This was the kind of affection I'd longed for my whole life. Was this normal? Were all good relationships like this? Was it way too early to feel this wonderful?

"That's because it's not really sleep. Come on, let's go inside. You rest a while."

I knew he was right, and I didn't want to admit it. Begrudgingly, I tossed back the chenille throw draped over my body and prepared to get up. I was surprised when Edward rose and scooped me up from the chair all in one smooth motion.

"I think I can walk that far you know," I hinted, indicating to the French doors only a few feet away.

Edward paused, looking at me curiously, almost as if the thought never occurred to him. "Do you want to?" he asked softly.

I thought about it for a split second as I felt the security of his arms around me, cradling me close. "No," I admitted sheepishly, resting my head on his shoulder.

We returned to the beautiful golden bedroom, and he gently deposited me on the bed before he took care of my dishes from the deck and closed the doors and the blinds again.

I settled myself into the soft mattress and pulled the comforter up to my chin. Edward lingered at the foot of the bed with his hands tucked loosely in his jeans pockets. He was too far away, and I wanted to reassure him that I wanted him closer. I felt so vulnerable and awkward. "Will you stay until I fall asleep? I don't want to be alone."

He moved slowly toward the chair he'd occupied when I'd first awakened.

"No, closer," I pleaded, eying the large expanse of mattress on either side of me.

"You're perfectly safe here, you know. My family likes you, and they want to get to know you. They'd never—"

"I know," I said, surprised to believe what I was saying. "That isn't why I want you close."

Edward carefully climbed onto the bed and relaxed against the headboard, crossing his legs at his ankles.

I shifted to get closer, resting my head on his chest, wrapping my arm around his waist. "I-is this okay?"

"So much more than okay, Bella," he replied, and I could hear the smile in his voice. His hand slowly trailed up and down the length of my arm. The contact, the connection, felt amazing.

"Is this ever difficult for you? Being this close, I mean?" I wondered how Edward had gone from wanting to eat me for breakfast to serving me breakfast in bed after only a couple weeks.

"Sometimes," he confessed, his voice sounding far away. "You can't imagine how irresistible you are—every part of you, but I'm finding that with every moment I spend with you, every little glimpse into your soul, you're worth it. The pain, the discomfort, is minimal in comparison to the thought of not seeing you. Just a little mind over matter."

I could only tilt my face up and stare at him. I knew I was playing with fire in regard to my heart, but I was quickly willing to be consumed. I reached up slowly and traced my index finger down the smooth column of his throat. He swallowed reflexively when I got to his Adam's apple. I hated the idea that I was causing him pain, but I didn't think I could stay away from him even if my life depended on it. And it very well might.

"I don't like not seeing you either," I admitted, battling with myself as to whether or not I should say more. In the end, I didn't want to embarrass myself or scare him away, so I curled my fingers under the collar of his t-shirt and re-settled myself.

"I'm terribly afraid I'm rapidly forming an addiction to you, Bella. Something intense and unwavering. That mind over matter has quickly turned into something akin to tolerance. A little isn't enough anymore. I want more and more. I've never found myself in a situation like this before. I've never felt this way, and I'm finding myself struggling with it more than I anticipated. It's difficult for… something like me to let you be independent. I know you value it immensely, but I feel so protective of you. I want to take you away from here and hole up with you someplace where no one can find us—human or vampire. It's hard to let you be brave and do your job when I desperately want to do what nature has taught me."

I didn't know what to say or where to start. Did he feel the way I did? Should I keep my mouth shut and sit back like a scared wallflower, or grow a set for once and admit to myself, to him, that I wanted something? The steadfast fear of rejection, of abject loneliness, seemed abated for now. Not gone completely, but crouching, waiting in some darker corner of my mind. Edward had extended himself so much in the last twenty four hours. I had been groomed to tell when people were lying, and I didn't think he had any motive to lie now.

"I—" I sat up a little, looking down at him, nearly speechless due to the butterflies swarming riotously in my stomach.

"Bella, it's okay if you don't feel the same way. Don't feel like you have to say anything at all. I know you said relationships were new to you, but—"

Pressing a finger to his lips, I silenced him. "Shut up," I whispered, tracing his lip line, feeling him smile against my fingertip. "I've never found myself in a situation like this either, and just because I don't know what I'm doing, that doesn't mean that I don't want you—desperately. I can't stop thinking of you, and I don't want to. I could say I wasn't terrified on multiple levels, but it would be a lie. I'm beyond scared, but I hope you'll still be here with me."

He grew serious suddenly, taking my hand between both of his, and his gold eyes flamed with intensity. "Bella, I'm going to keep you safe. I will not let James hurt you. The family is all committed to seeing this through."

Raising our joined hands, I pressed my lips to his cool skin. "I know, and I appreciate all of your help. I'm scared for myself, for all of you, and I won't lie. I'm scared because I'm the closest I've ever been to solving the one murder that means the most to me, and I couldn't stop anyone else from dying at his hand. I'm so close, and yet I don't know what to do now. I know I can't lock a vampire up…" I let my thoughts and voice fade away before I amended it with a whisper. "And those aren't the only reasons I'm afraid."

"Bella, we'll talk about the investigation and how we could help later after you've rested, but what else are you scared of?"

Turning away from him, I wrapped my arms around my legs and rested my chin on my knees. I faced the book shelf unit opposite the bed, my eyes jumping from photo to photo and lingering over the artifacts that gave Edward a history—a place in the world. I didn't have that kind of history with anyone, I had no roots, but could I make some with Edward? Could a vampire and a human have a life together? Was it possible, or were we doomed from the start? Would he want that?

"I'm afraid of losing you… pushing or scaring you away. Can a human and a vampire even do… this?" I gestured wildly between us, feeling the panic rise up inside me.

"Bella," he said in a soft voice, capturing one of my hands in his and smoothed the other over my face. "Shh. That's not going to happen. I won't lie, a relationship is going to be tough, but as I understand it what relationship isn't? There will be days I can't be seen with you if it's sunny, I must be ever mindful of how I touch you, and I might have to hunt more frequently for a while, but you're worth it. I keep worrying you're going to run away screaming. After your past experiences, I wouldn't blame you one bit, you have no reason to trust me." He paused, sitting up next to me and taking my chin in his hand, gently turning my face toward his. He swallowed and smiled the sweetest, most genuinely soft smile. "There's so much I want to tell you about how I feel, about how vampires experience relationships, but not right now. Now you need to rest."

His hands trailed down my arms before he gently pried my hands away from my legs. He resumed his earlier position on the bed and pulled me down with him. I settled my head on his shoulder and let my eyes fall closed with a sigh. Just when the conversation was beginning to get interesting, he wanted me to rest. What did he mean 'how vampires experience relationships'? How did they? I hooked my finger through the belt loop on his jeans, and I heard and felt him laugh against my head pressed to his chest.

"What are you doing?"

I refused to open my eyes and see him laughing at me. "Ensuring you stay, for a little while at least."

I jumped when he pressed his lips to my cheekbone; I hadn't felt him move at all. "Oh, my silly girl. I won't leave you."

I bit my lip and smiled, playing his words from this most recent conversation over and over in my head, trying not to be excited, trying not to expect too much. I knew it was futile, I was too far gone.

Author's Note: Many, MANY thanks to duskwatcher2153 for the beta and circa1918 for the advice. You make me want to be a better writer. Go read their work, you won't regret it.

Hi all. :-) I just learned this week that I was nominated for a Best WIP Award over at Rob Attack Fan Fiction Fridays. I'm beyond thrilled. Thank you to whomever nominated me. To say you've made my life is an understatement. If you are so inclined to vote for me, you can vote here: kwiksurveys DOT com/app/showpoll DOT asp?qid=55916&sid=bw70jnzqfz4cubs55916&new=True

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