Wanted You More (Lady Antebellum)
Quinn wanted to leave for California right away but I couldn't.
I needed to talk to Britt first.
She called herself my best friend and I felt like I needed to tell her about this.
Whatever this was.
And even though I knew that the look in Quinn's eyes, when I told her that I was meeting Brittany, was a look of pain, I couldn't just go off without talking to her first.
I needed to let her go.
That's why Quinn brought me here...right?
And that's why I needed to go it alone.
If I left with things like this...without at least talking to Britt first, I knew that I would get to California and I would spend too many nights drunk and crying.
And if I was holding onto something that was over, then I could lose a chance at real love.
Right now, the very idea of losing Quinn hurt my stomach and made me feel uneasy.
No...this thing with Britt needed to be finished...
For good.
Quinn had offered to come with me but I had insisted that she go get the car serviced instead.
There was just no need for Q to be there...she would distract me from my goal.
At least, that was what I thought before I saw two blonde heads walking into the Lima Bean...together.
In that moment, I regretted not having Quinn with me.
How could B think that bringing him, would be okay?
Trouty held tight to her hand and they both smiled as they slid into the booth across from me.
She didn't even look apologetic.
My feelings hadn't even come into her mind.
How fucked up is that?
At first, I was going to completely ignore him but I found that I couldn't.
I looked at him and bared my teeth, ready to eviscerate him but then I took a breath.
He wasn't worth it.
And then I realized every angry thing wasn't about Britt being with him but about him screwing Q.
I knew though, that I couldn't bring Quinn into this.
So I looked at B and when I saw that she was tensed up, ready for me to tear her boy toy down, I dropped my eyes, happy that I had hesitated.
Besides, she suddenly didn't feel worth the fight either.
And that hurt more than anything, knowing that I was done with her.
I was done wanting her more than my own happiness.
"How are you?" Her voice cut through my mind a moment later and I looked up at her and then at him.
"Everything is good. I just wanted to say goodbye...I'm moving to California and I wasn't sure when I would see you again."
She looked shocked but smiled at me anyway.
Britt and I have always been connected, it's something that helped us to be so close before but right now, I couldn't feel it.
It was like the connection between us was broken.
This wasn't my girl.
She was his.
"Oh...are you going to go to school there, Santana?"
"Who knows? We leave tonight though...I'm pretty excited."
Her eyebrows raised and I could tell that she was fighting back her true feelings.
My Brittany was still in there and from the looks of it, she was trying to talk to me without words but our connection wasn't there anymore.
I couldn't read her.
Thankfully, Sam cut in.
"Who ya going with?"
"Quinn." I said without looking at her.
Suddenly, seeing her expression was too painful for me.
"You two hooked up at the wedding right?" Fishy lips said.
For a moment I glared at him but then she got my attention.
I heard her gasp but I didn't look at her...I couldn't.
Did she not know?
I nodded and sipped at my coffee.
Ready to play it off.
"Yea...we uh...I guess you can call it that."
"That's cool." He said with a smile.
I guess he was happy that I wasn't here to steal his girl away.
"Yea, we are going to move out there together."
"Oh wow...so you are like together, together? How insane is that? My two exes." He said as he looked over at Britt.
The next comment was just there for the taking.
I'm Santana Lopez...not Wonder woman.
"I know right? Isn't it insane when a person's two exes start sleeping together...almost like betrayal...but not...right, B?" I said but of course it was over his head but not hers.
No, she was smarter than him and she got what I meant.
When I looked at her, I could see that her face was pale and her cheeks were bright red.
She looked like she wanted to crumble.
She was close to crying but was fighting it.
Whether for my benefit or for his, I wasn't sure.
It didn't matter anyway.
He just continued to look at Britt, not liking how upset she looked.
"You okay, baby?"
Baby.
I clenched my fists beneath the table and fought the urge to knock that stupid fucking grin off his big lipped face.
Of course she wasn't okay.
You fucking idiot.
My phone buzzed on the table top, distracting me from my momentary rage.
He didn't deserve her.
But that wasn't my problem anymore.
I couldn't fight the smile that came to my lips, when Quinn's face flashed on the screen.
Relief.
Something that I never expected to feel when someone was calling my attention away from Brittany.
Talk about insane!
I stood from the table and swiped my thumb over my screen.
"Hey Lucy Q...what's up?" I said loudly before moving towards the counter for a fresh cup of coffee.
"How's the talk with her going?"
"Them, would be the better term there, Q." I grumbled.
"She brought him on your date?"
She was fucking snickering.
Bitch.
"It wasn't a date, Q." I snapped.
"Whatever...do you need me to save you?"
I was nodding but I couldn't give in.
She was trying to make me see that I had been wrong.
"Nah...it's fine."
"Sure...that's why you're nodding...right?"
I whipped around and there standing by the door was Q with a big ass smirk on her face.
Relief.
Something that seemed to be a side effect of being around Quinn.
Totally unexpected but very much appreciated!
Quinn didn't let me decide if she was going to leave this time around.
She grabbed my hand and held it as I ordered coffee for the both of us and then she paid.
I kept my head down because she was being all chivalrous and shit.
When I sat back down with Quinn, Britt's whole face changed.
She couldn't take her eyes off Quinn.
"Hey Britt, Sam." Quinn said as she took the liberty of wrapping her arm over my shoulders.
I leaned into her automatically and suddenly felt like a cat with the sudden urge to nuzzle her neck.
Thankfully, I resisted.
Britt looked hurt.
When we started officially dating, I would hold her hand under a napkin only but now I was openly leaning against another girl in public.
It was tense.
And I knew that Quinn felt it.
Sam though didn't feel the tension.
Instead he seemed happy to now be on a double date.
Happy that he didn't have to fight for the girl next to him.
"It's good to see you two together. You both look happy." He said with a smile.
Quinn nodded and hugged me tighter.
"Did you tell them about California, yet?"
I nodded and then sipped at my coffee.
How awkward was this?
Britt seemed to agree with me because she was getting antsy in her seat.
She looked in my face and I smiled.
"You okay, B?"
"Um yea...I think that Lord Tubbington put itching powder in my shirt again."
I nodded, knowing an excuse when I heard one.
That cat had always been her way of trying to sound clever when she was uncomfortable but I knew the truth.
She wanted out of this situation.
And so did I.
But before I could leave...I needed her to feel what I felt.
I wanted her to understand how fucking inconsiderate it was to bring him here.
This could have been avoided.
My head was telling me to torture her but my heart wouldn't let me.
I turned to Quinn who was blocking me in the booth and smiled.
"Q...would you mind...if I talked to B alone for a minute?"
She smiled at me and cocked her eyebrow at me but she nodded with a grin.
She wanted me to end this...I got that.
And that was my plan.
It seemed that the connection had moved from me and Britt to me and Quinn.
Go figure!
"Sure...I wanted to talk to Sam about something anyway. Do you mind Britt...you know, if I steal him from you for few minutes?"
Britt nodded and immediately turned towards me without so much of a glance towards her boyfriend.
Quinn though leaned in and kissed my lips.
I kissed her back but didn't linger.
When she pulled away she tapped her wrist.
"We need to get on the road in an hour...okay?"
I nodded.
"Thanks, Q."
"All you had to do was ask."
She winked, saluted me and then pulled Trouty away.
Thankfully!
Although her words weren't lost on me.
When I met Britt's eyes, she looked broken.
"Is she like Karofsky or like that girl from your school? Are you doing this to make me hurt, do you want me to be jealous?"
How dare she doubt me!
"No...this thing that's happening between me and Q, has absolutely nothing to do with you."
"Yeah right."
She crossed her arms over her chest as she looked at me.
Of course she would think that I couldn't move on.
But I had...I was.
"Think what you want, B. I don't really care anymore. I just wanted to meet with you and tell you about us. You're my best friend right? I'm falling for her...it's something big for me and I thought that you would be happy for me...happy that I finally moved on."
She looked hurt.
"I am happy...if, you know...you are." She whispered as a tear ran down her cheek.
I wanted to lean forward and brush the tear away but that wasn't my place anymore.
"I am, happier than I think that I have ever been."
"G-good. I'm happy then." She said as more tears streaked down her cheeks.
She was lying through her teeth.
Her heart was breaking again.
Just like in the choir room.
Just like when I came back from Louisville.
This time though, I wasn't doing it for her...I was doing it for me.
She and I were finally over and it felt good.
Of course, things never end up perfectly.
My head whipped to the side when I heard a loud smack.
Trouty was holding his face as Q pulled her hand back.
"The genius slapper, strikes again." Britt spat out bitterly.
I nodded.
"That's my girl." I said with pride.
And I had meant it.
A/N: Mmmm...that was fun! Still not sure what this is...lets just keep having fun...shall we?