AN: Sorry for the delay in updates – was travelling a bit out of state during July. As always, a sincere thank you to the reviewers and supporters of this story. These chapters are always for you.

Hope everyone is doing well.

Take care and enjoy.

CHAPTER 44

"The moon on the one hand, the dawn on the other:

The moon is my sister, the dawn is my brother.

The moon on my left and the dawn on my right.

My brother, good morning: my sister, good night."

-Hilaire Belloc

CATHERINE POV

"You're worrying."

I feel the timber of Sara's voice, my ear against her chest.

"I'm sleeping."

That draws a laugh from my companion.

"Uh huh."

I sigh, turning slightly while Sara continues running her fingers gently through my hair.

"Babe…" she says softly. "Everything's going to be okay."

My hold on Sara tightens, my arm wrapped tightly around her waist.

Of all the things we've been through, I think this recent development scares me the most. It feels so unfair that Sara can battle through so much, only to be at this point. The point where we are both waiting for a phone call to tell us whether her seizures have been causing brain damage.

Sara's strong, so strong, but this is something she has no control over. She can't fight this, or push through this. This is something completely out of our control.

I hate it.

"I love you."

Smiling slightly at the ironic timing of her words, I let my fingers rub gently along Sara's hip.

"I'm sorry."

Sara's fingers pause before resuming.

"Why?"

"That I'm not dealing better with this," I confess.

"Cath," Sara breathes out softly. "You can't be serious…you've been so strong about everything…"

"Right," I laugh. "If you consider falling apart and acting like a lunatic these last days strong."

"Catherine."

She places a gentle kiss into my hair.

"You're human, honey. You're allowed to have moments to be emotional."

Leaning up, I place my lips against hers.

I smile softly. "Well, let's just thank our lucky stars you're the silent, stoic type. Provides a nice balance to our temperaments."

Sara smiles slightly as she holds me close, leaning her head back against the headboard of her bed.

"Everything will work out, Catherine. I promise."

I snuggle deeper into her shoulder, deciding to believe her.

It beats the alternative.

"Trajectory suggests a third party."

The occupants of the room consider this.

"Perhaps the wife came back in?" Russell proposes.

Finn shrugs, "Or she never left."

"I don't know," I put down my pen with a shake of my head. "Something's still off about the son."

"You're thinking his alibi is a ruse?"

"I'm thinking a lot of people have best friends who would step in in a pinch. Do a favor, fabricate a story for their buddy, ask questions later."

A ringing interrupts our conversation, all eyes traveling to the tall brunette pulling her cell from her pocket.

"Sorry," she murmurs, moving to send it to voicemail. But, the caller ID seems to catch her attention, fingers pausing.

Her eyes flash up to mine.

"Sorry," she offers again, stepping away from the conference table. "I need to take this."

One last glance in my direction and she's out the door.

Our eyes met only briefly, but it was more than enough time to know exactly who that call is from.

It's only when Russell calls my name do I realize someone was talking to me.

"Hmm?" I ask. "Sorry…I…"

Finn's eyes narrow, sensing the sudden tension in the room.

"It's okay," she says kindly. "I was just asking if you wanted me to try to talk to the best friend. Scare some honesty into him if he's lying."

She shrugs.

"Nothing like threats of obstruction and impeding a homicide investigation to get to the bottom of things."

I nod, "May as well. Can't hurt."

She glances between Russell and I, the tension in the room only growing with each passing minute.

"I'll, uh, get on that…" Finn offers uncomfortably. "Now."

Quickly gathering her papers, she steps out.

Russell's eyes remain on mine.

"Do I want to know?"

"Huh?"

"Don't fool around with me, Catherine," he states directly. "Do I want to know what that phone call is about?"

I let my hands clench the table instead of the more fragile case file.

"Catherine."

I lift my gaze to his.

"Please don't ask me about the subject of that call."

Russell's steady gaze remains in place, neither one of us moving.

"I love Sara," I explain to him quietly. "And she's also my best friend."

I know Russell is smart enough to get my reference to the conversation we all had only moments before. The implications of my words.

Straightening his posture, he pushes his glasses back up his nose.

Nodding silently, he motions to the door.

"Go."

Giving him a look of gratitude, I waste no time making my exit.

Where is she?

Where the fuck is she?

Spinning in the hallway panic, I place my hands anxiously on my head.

I feel like my heart is racing so fast my arteries will explode.

Damn it, Sara. Where the hell did you go?

Glancing at my phone again to be sure I didn't miss a message from her, I see nothing.

I first need to establish that she's even still here.

Pushing through the lab doors, I jog through the lot to where her car was parked.

Still is parked.

Glad she hasn't left, I sigh in relief. But, the relief is short lived as I'm still left without a clue of where she is.

"Cath."

Startling, I jerk around, eyes wide as Sara steps out from between a couple parked cars.

"Sorry," she offers. "I…I needed some air…"

I take in her appearance, her pale features.

Her trembling hands.

"Sara," I whisper nervously, closing the distance between us slowly.

Reaching her, I gently take her good hand in mine, holding it tight.

"What did Hannah say?"

Sara swallows, fighting to speak. "She…uh…she…"

I gently run the fingers of my free hand across her cheek. "It's okay, honey, take your time."

My words sound convincing, but inside I'm screaming.

Sara shakes her head stubbornly, frustrated at herself.

"She said there was evidence of a small bleed that resolved."

"A bleed…" I get out. "In your brain."

"That resolved, it's fine." Sara repeats. "Likely from hitting my head during one of my seizures – re-injuring some of the tissue that was damaged by…"

She doesn't have to finish.

I know exactly who and what caused the initial damage and started us down this road.

If that man wasn't already rotting in jail…

"But if it was resolved on that scan…" I start, Sara's words catching up to me, "then that wouldn't explain the problems with your neurological functioning – the things Hannah noticed on her exam earlier that same day."

Sara breathes in and out slowly.

"Sara," my eyes narrow. "What aren't you telling me?"

"They think the seizure medication I'm on is starting to give me side effects."

Sara meets my eyes, expression hard to read.

"They didn't find any evidence of brain damage, Cath," she states quietly. "That's the important thing. This explanation is a much better one."

I listen to her words, still trying to get myself to comprehend everything and let it sink in.

No brain damage.

Placing my hands against Sara's chest, I watch her for a moment before pulling her into my embrace.

"God, Sara, I was so worried about you."

Silently, she moves her arms to hold me.

"Everything's fine," she tells me soothingly. "You don't have to worry. I'm okay, Catherine."

Holding her close, I revel in the comfort of being in her arms. It feels like the moment you finally grab hold of a lifejacket in a stormy sea.

Placing a kiss into her dark hair, I pull back slightly.

"What happens now?"

Sara sighs, somewhat reluctant to meet my eyes.

"They pull me from the study."

My own eyes close at the weight of her words.

I somehow suspected this was coming from what Sara said. If she's having neurological impairment, a very serious side effect from her study drug, there's no way they would let her stay on it.

Still, it's devastating.

"Hannah said the study is ending soon, anyway," Sara's voice cuts into my thoughts.

Opening my eyes, I keep my hands on her shoulders as I give her my full attention.

"Apparently the FDA has enough evidence to prove the beneficial use of this method of treatment for the early cessation of seizures. Approved it for general use to be affective any day now. They will continue to collect follow-up data to be sure people don't have later term affects like I did. But so far very few people have had issues. Hannah thinks mine may have been…"

Sara swallows.

"May have been related to previous brain injuries I had as a child. Made me more susceptible."

I squeeze her shoulder, trying to steady us both from the imagery and emotions that statement brings up in both of us for different reasons.

"Well I'm glad the study was deemed a success, I guess," I offer halfheartedly, happy for the other people who will get to benefit, but pissed on Sara's behalf that she isn't one of them.

Approved or not, she clearly has negative reactions to the drug and the process with which it was being used.

"Sara, I'm sorry."

She shakes her head, "Hannah said that other hospitals were using other drugs in their arms of the trial. A few of which have already been approved, others which should be getting a decision any day now."

I raise my brows.

"So you mean…"

Sara nods. "Hannah is willing to switch me over to one of the other approved drugs, as long as I go for weekly monitoring to be sure I'm not having any adverse reactions and that it's effective. A lot of the other drugs utilize different neurological pathways, giving them a good shot at not giving me the same problems this one did."

For the first time in what feels like days, I smile.

"So you can still be in the field?"

"Yes," she says, a light smile finally gracing her own harrowed features. "I see Hannah in the morning to start the process of switching over to a new drug."

"Thank God," I whisper, unable to resist hugging her again.

Granted, the whole brain damage issue was of course the issue of main importance here. But, the thought of Sara losing her shot at being in the field with everything else the young woman has sacrificed would have been beyond devastating in its own way.

Fingers running through Sara's soft hair, I breathe in deeply.

"Please don't scare me like this again," I all but beg, holding her tightly. "I'm rather fond of this brilliant, dorky brain of yours."

She stiffens somewhat, her hand running through my hair.

"I wish I could promise you that, Catherine."

Her words are soft, almost whispered. And, they're filled with sadness.

"I'm so sorry you've been put through all of this."

"Stop," I pull back, covering her mouth with my hand.

At her raised brow, I only grip tighter.

"That's not what I meant, Sara," I tell her seriously. "I was serious when I said I wanted to be with you, no matter how sick you ever get or how long or how successful or unsuccessful your road to recovery is."

I look deeply into her expressive eyes.

"This all changes nothing."

Letting out a breath, I let go of her mouth.

"Nothing could ever change how I feel about you."

Sara watches me, standing quietly before she leans in and kisses me.

"I just want our life together to be as beautiful as you deserve," she confesses as she pulls back. "More beautiful than kidnappings and hospitals and courtrooms."

I smile, watching this selfless, caring woman that I love.

"Those were just the prologue, honey." I kiss her deeply. "Now it's time to see what the chapters hold."

I pull away, watching the shifting sunlight bring out the auburn highlights in Sara's hair.

"And, something tells me it's going to be beautiful beyond our greatest imagining."

AN: Thanks for reading. I believe one more chapter left to go.