Gus had asked to be carried back and despite that it was a long walk and he was really getting too heavy for it, Jed couldn't deny his grandson.
He was almost beginning to regret that decision as he climbed the stairs back to the upper floor of the mansion. Gus had fallen asleep before they had made it back inside and was dead weight in his grandfather's arms.
Mentally berating himself for allowing himself to fall out of shape, Jed navigated the last few steps and nodded a silent thanks to the agent who opened the bedroom door for him. He grimaced as his back pulled when he went to carefully lay the sleeping boy in the bed. Thankfully neither Abbey nor the girls were around as he indulged himself in a quick rub, stretch and roll of his shoulders to release the tension in his back before he got to work removing Gus' boots and winter jacket. He shook his head in amazement that despite the movement the boy slept on, never stirring once. What Jed wouldn't give to be able to sleep that soundly again.
He smiled sadly as he perched on the side of the bed, watching his grandson sleep. Gus was born not long before Jed took office and there hadn't been time to be the doting grandfather. Although he loved the boy deeply he worried that perhaps Gus didn't know that. He worried that instead, to Gus, his grandfather was simply a busy man who lived in a fancy place that they got to visit from time to time.
Jed thought back and realized it wasn't too much different with Annie. When she was little he was running for Governor. Of course it was different because it was still in New Hampshire and there wasn't the secret service and so much protocol but there were still crazy hours and responsibilities not to mention the Meetings of the Governors and New England Regional meetings and various events and counsels in DC that he would travel too. His time was sparse and what little of it he had was given to Zoey and Ellie while they were still living at home and Abbey and he balanced the parental responsibilities between two busy professionals. He had seen more of Annie than he did with Gus but it wasn't much more and he certainly hadn't seen her much at all in the past 5 and a half years. He realized now that he had never had been the devoted and spoiling Grandfather he imagined himself to be.
Liz and Abbey were right. They hadn't been able to do it all and the family had never been Currier and Ives. He idealized that simple American life but too often reality got in the way and life for the Bartlett family was far from simple and it certainly had never been easy. It shouldn't be news to him but somehow it was.
He stopped himself before he started thinking too hard about reality versus his own perceptions or forced perceptions; he knew it would just make him depressed. He didn't want to be depressed now; he felt as if he was still barely balancing on the edge of himself and he needed to ground himself with something he knew to be real. He wanted so badly to just enjoy an evening with his family; his girls.
Things had been better since Abbey came back, but he didn't know how long it would last and he knew he needed to take this rare opportunity to be with his family before the moment disappeared. He pushed the hair back from Gus' forehead and kissed him lightly before getting up and going in search of his girls.
He ducked into the dining room and his heart sunk as he found the room empty and the table cleared. He had been so close. Even with them all actually in the same building he still couldn't manage a meal with his family. He sighed in abject defeat and closed his eyes.
He had felt rejuvenated sharing that innocent moment with Gus as he had watched his grandson joyfully flip the switch on the tree but those feelings were quickly escaping and he again felt dejected and tired.
He briefly contemplated crossing over to the office to see if his daughters were still there listening to the music but decided against it; certain his foul mood would ruin any chance of a happy moment, not to mention that Liz was still mad at him.
He spared a moment to wonder where Abbey was; the moment they had shared earlier had set him on edge and he was left unsure how to interpert her response to his questions. She had left so abruptly he assumed she needed some space to sort her thoughts out on her own so instead of going to find her he moved with heavy limbs to his bedroom.
As he approached the doors he thought he heard something familiar.
Yes. There it was. Abbey's laughter. But it wasn't coming from the bedroom. It was across the hall in the casual sitting room. Curious he changed direction and headed toward the sound. As he approached he heard Zoey's giggle as well.
He peeked his head in and froze at the scene in front of him.
His girls, all 4 of them, were clad in pajamas and sitting on the floor between the sofa and the fireplace. The ham dinner intended for the stately dining room was set up on the coffee table and Ellie, Zoey and Abbey were laughing at Liz who had somehow made a mess as she had apparently tried to grab a small piece of ham not realizing it was attached to more than could be seen.
It wasn't long before his presence was noticed and Abbey called over to him, "There you are, Babe. We were afraid you and Gus got lost in the wilderness."
He was still too stunned to form an adequate response and was saved from undignified stammering by Liz, "Where is he now? Did you put him to bed?"
Jed nodded, still in the doorway. "Uh Yeah." Still unsure of what was happening Jed's struggled to mask his bewilderment, "He fell asleep before we even made it back inside, kid sleeps like a champ."
Liz shook her head. Zoey smirked at her father, "Yeah, he's also wicked heavy Dad. Did you carry him the whole way up here? How's your back after that?"
Jed waved aside her concern, "Heavy for a mere mortal maybe but not your old man. I'm fine." He stuck his hands in his jeans pocket and rocked on his feet. struggling to keep the desperation out of his voice he asked, "What are you all up to here?"
Abbey shrugged and looked up at him from where he sat, "I couldn't remember when it was last just the five of us and weather and everyone in their slippers. So I changed dinner plans. Hope you don't mind?" She held his gaze meaningfully, silently communicating as much as she could.
Jed just stared at her, hearing his own words repeated back to him he read her gaze and realized she had orchestrated this moment for him. He locked eyes with his wife. She had shed her elegant suit and glamorous jewelry and cleaned her face of any makeup. She sat at an awkward angle on the floor in a pair of old, shapeless flannel pajamas flanked by their similarly attired daughters and to Jed she had never been more beautiful. Unbidden, a lump raised in his throat. He remained silent, afraid to speak for fear of embarrassing himself in front of his daughters.
"Come on Dad. Go change and then come join us." Ellie indicated the empty space between her and Abbey.
Liz added, "There's fondue for dessert."
Jed's eyebrows rose at his eldest, "You're willing to share with me?"
She bit her lip in mock concentration. "I haven't decided yet. But seeing as this is fake Christmas I may be convinced to be forgiving."
Jed smiled warmly at her, "Well, I've never been one to turn down melted chocolate but I'm feeling a little over dressed. Give me a minute and I'll be right back."
"Hurry before Liz dumps the rest of the ham on the floor!" Zoey called after him.
He made it across the hall and behind the closed doors of the bedroom before he squeezed his eyes shut and choked back the relief that threatened to overwhelm him. He managed a few shuddering breaths before quickly removing his jacket and clothes and replacing them with his own favorite pajamas. He splashed some water on his face to cleanse any evidence of his emotional turmoil and grabbed his robe before hurrying back across the hall.
He slowed when he reached the door to the sitting room and forced himself to slowly saunter back in.
"That was quick." Abbey smirked knowingly.
He flashed her an unrepentant grin and eased himself into the space on the floor between his wife and his middle daughter. He leaned forward and grabbed a small plate of food before leaning back against the couch. Abbey shifted so she was leaning against him, her head on his shoulder.
As the girls went back to happily teasing each other about some unknown event from years past Abbey leaned up so Jed could hear her whisper,
"Merry Christmas Jethro."
A/N: Part of me really wanted to have this be the end. But, I believe, like with the scene in chapter 11, a single moment doesn't mean everything is all better. They still need to talk. So I leave it to you the reader; you may stop here and have the happy family moment be the end of the story or you can read the next 1 (maybe 2?) chapters for a less light hearted resolution.