A/N: I'm back! Two in one day! What?! Yep...I did that ;) I was searching for a song and I was just like fuck it...I put my music on shuffle and this song came on...and it fit PERFECTLY! ;)

Some of you, were so on the money and if I could hug you, I would!

I promised that I wouldn't torture you for too long...and I'm a woman of my word!

Happy reading!

I love you chicas!

(That's why, I torture you so ;P)

-A

My Love Is Like a Star (Demi Lovato)

Quinn's POV

I wasn't sure what to expect when I saw her.

There had been so many changes over the last few months that for all I knew, she could have shaved her head.

We didn't Skype...how would I know?

My navigation system was taking me out of downtown L.A. and towards the hills.

That didn't seem right to me.

But then...I should have expected that too.

She was getting weekly flights, our apartment was still being paid for and she was constantly looking very well put together.

Her living in Beverly Hills wasn't much of a stretch past that.

How blind had I been?

Why hadn't she told me any of this?

I was still crying as I pulled up to a huge iron gate.

What the fuck?

I wiped at my face when I saw a short guy walking towards my car.

My tears had been streaming down my cheeks the entire ride and so I probably looked like shit but he was smiling.

He tapped my window and then waited.

How was I supposed to act normal when I saw her after this?

I took a deep breath and put the window down.

"Hi, I'm here to see Santana Lopez...I'm Quinn, her wife."

He smiled and put his hand out for me to shake.

I shook it and then pulled my hand back.

He leaned closer and looked around inside the car and then at me.

"She's been calling down here for the last hour asking if you got here and threatening to go all Lima Heights if I got you lost...I'm glad you finally showed up. I'm Cesar...the gate keeper."

I felt a smile come to my face.

That sounded like my wife.

It gave me hope.

"Is that your actual title?"

He smiled and shook his head as he handed me a placard for my window and a plastic card on a lanyard.

"No, I just think it sounds cool. Put this on your rearview mirror...security here is very strict about that. You are going to go through this gate, make the second left and follow the road to the end of the cul-de-sac. The address is 20-15...each house has its own gate. Swipe this pass through the reader and follow the drive up to the house. She will meet you at the house. Got it?"

"Wow. That's a lot to remember."

"Trust me it's much easier than it sounds. We have a lot of high-profile people living here...paparazzi tends to swarm at times. We need to be careful about who has access."

"Wow...thank you, Cesar."

"My pleasure, Mrs. Lopez...enjoy your stay."

Every single house that I passed by was a mansion.

They all had these huge gates and it just seemed the further I drove, the bigger they got.

How was she able to live like this?

The questions just kept racking up.

Britt was so going to hear about this when I saw her.

If she knew all of this and hadn't told me...even when she saw me suffering for four long weeks...

Breathe Quinn...just...

Fuck.

I saw the address.

20-15

The house that stood beyond the gate was the kind of thing that you see in old Hollywood movies.

It was more than a mansion...

This had been where my wife had been living.

And the Santana that I knew would have been bragging.

Shit...I would be.

How could she not tell me anything?

When she moved in she had told me that it was nice.

But that was it.

I figured it was comparable to our apartment.

But this...

I felt sick.

By the time that made it past the gate, I was cursing.

It was the only way that I could get out my frustration with my wife before actually seeing her.

My music was blasting and I was pretty sure that my face was soaked.

The driveway was pretty long but I could see her standing outside of the house.

It was far enough away that I couldn't see any of her features but I could see her.

My heart was racing.

The cursing slowed and I remembered why I was here.

I remembered how excited I was to spend time with her.

And so halfway down the driveway...I stopped the car.

Turned the music off,

And without another moment's hesitation, I dropped my head and I prayed.

The prayer wasn't long.

Or eloquent.

Just short and sweet.

"Father be with me, help me to do right by her...even if you have to silence my tongue. Amen."

Santana's POV

I was on edge.

There was all this pressure to be honest with my wife.

And I was tempted to put it off.

But then when I saw her car pulling up the driveway and I was filled with guilt.

Guilt for not being truthful about where I lived, how I lived or why I lived this way.

I hated this place.

Well most days, I did and other days...it was a sanctuary.

These last four weeks...it had been a prison.

It's why I was never home unless I had to be.

Now though...I needed to be honest.

I was mumbling to myself.

Going over and over in my head what I would say to her.

How I would act...if I would smile or make a smart ass comment.

But then the car stopped and so did I.

Everything seemed to freeze in that moment...even my breathing.

Was I supposed to go to her?

Had she changed her mind?

Fuck...fuck...fuck.

What was I supposed to do?

I needed her help.

But she was gone.

It was just me.

Fuck.

"Please God...help!" I mumbled as I bounced on my feet and wrapped my arms around myself. "God, please...please...I need her."

I was suddenly filled with a shitload of energy and emotions but I couldn't bring myself to move from that spot.

And then just a few seconds later...she was driving again.

I could breathe again.

Quinn's POV

I parked the car at the top of the driveway and took a moment to look at her.

She had lost more weight...which didn't even seem possible.

Her skin was pale and her hair was longer.

She still looked flawless but I could see the cracks in her armor.

From the outside...she looked like a bombshell beauty but to me...her wife...I could see that she was sick.

And suddenly the anger was gone.

It was like God was helping me to see beyond what she presented to the world.

This was what Britt had been trying to say.

She needs you...

Be patient...

And now that I could see that...see her...

I knew that it wasn't about trying to be there.

It was more than that.

"Hey." I said when I stepped in front of her.

She didn't say anything in response, instead she just pulled me against her.

Her body felt smaller.

Almost too small.

She hadn't been doing well in the last month.

I should have seen the signs.

I should have come sooner.

"I missed you." She whispered as she clung tightly to me.

"I missed you more." I said before kissing her neck.

"Impossible." She said as she pulled back and looked into my eyes.

Now that I was closer to her, I could see the dark rings under her eyes and how dilated her pupils were.

She looked tired.

But I wasn't going to comment.

In that moment, I knew that I had to handle this like a Fabray.

Quiet and observant.

"Maybe you're right."

She nodded, satisfied with my answer and then took my hand and pulled me towards the house.

It was too much.

She was one person.

This was just too much for her.

I was worried.

"Are you hungry?" She asked as she pulled me into the kitchen.

I was tempted to say no...but then I looked at just how skinny she was and decided against it.

"Yea...how about we go out for lunch?"

She smiled and nodded.

"Sure, Lucy Q...I was thinking the same thing...maybe the beach?"

"Oh that sounds great, baby. With school and work, I have not had time to see the beach in quite a while."

"That's a shame...well, while you are here...we can take care of that...yea?"

She was holding her hands out in front of her and smiling with her everything.

It was refreshing.

"Definitely."

"Okay...well why don't we get you unpacked and then we can head out."

"Great!"

Santana's POV

I was doing my best to be normal.

But she knew.

I could tell.

Her eyes never lied...actually Quinn just couldn't lie for shit and I knew, that she knew that something was up.

And so when she decided to take a shower and get ready for our day at the beach, I slipped away.

I just needed the time.

I needed to know what I was up against.

Sometimes things between me and Quinn could feel like a game of chess.

And I didn't want that.

I wanted a marriage that mirrored my parents not hers.

And I knew that she wanted that too...

"Please...just talk me through this." I whispered into my phone.

"Are you scared? Seriously? It's just Quinn...the love of your life."

"I know but she...I don't know...it was just off."

"I think that you are worrying yourself too much. She's your wife. You chose her...deal with it." She snapped.

"B, please...I'm freaking...did you tell her something?"

"Um...no?"

I groaned and walked along the driveway, cracking my knuckles.

Merry fucking Christmas.

"What did you tell her, Brittany?" I snapped back, as I looked towards the house.

The last thing that I needed, was my wife to sneak up on me.

"Just to be patient with you."

"That's it? You didn't tell her that you knew something that she didn't...because that's a whole different thing than you just telling her to be patient."

"Look...I'm so fucking tired of being in the middle of you two, Santana. I am working on beating a fucking addiction and being a good mother and wife. I have my own shit to deal with. Okay? I need you to grow up and deal with this. It's not going away...we both know that. Just fucking deal with it. She isn't going to leave you...I didn't. I stuck around...and now its her turn. Okay?"

"B...I-"

She sighed and cut me off.

"Look, I need to go...it's Christmas Eve and I'm sober. I'd like to enjoy the time that I have with Nicky. So you need to go now and talk to your wife."

"Okay."

"Yea?"

"I'm sorry, B. Go have fun with Nicky. Merry Christmas." I muttered.

"Merry Christmas."

Quinn's POV

Standing under the water had worked to calm my nerves.

I realized that this was the first time that I didn't think that she was cheating on me.

This was something else, entirely.

When we had first started dating she told me about all the darkness that she felt.

About how sometimes she just needs to be held.

I remembered how worried her mom was when she was upset.

And things just started clicking for me.

This was bigger than her.

She seemed really scared.

And she had been alone in this big house for way too long.

It was enough to make me leave school...

Enough to make me consider moving here.

Was that crazy?

I knew that I had taken longer than normal in the shower but after all the driving and crying, I needed it.

When I stepped out into her bedroom, wrapped in one of her big fluffy robes, I froze for a second.

She was just sitting there staring at the mirror across from her bed.

Not moving...not doing anything.

Her eyes looked dead and it gave me a chill down my back.

"San?"

Her head snapped towards me and her face immediately changed.

She smiled softly and looked over my body.

Her sex drive wasn't broken at least.

"Hey, Q...good shower?"

I stepped closer to her and smiled.

"I didn't want to get out."

"Mmm yea...I can see that...you look like you were thinking hard." She said as I stood in front of her.

Her hands came to rest on my hips, as she looked up at me.

"I was just about to say the same thing about you."

I rested my hands on her cheeks and I tipped her head up further.

She was trying her best to smile but her eyes said so much more.

She was definitely scared.

"Yea?" She whispered.

I stepped as close as possible and soaked up being in her arms.

"I've been keeping things from you...but...I'm not cheating...there is no one else for me but you. You know that right?"

She smiled shakily at me as she ran her hands over my hips and up my back.

"I know that now." I admitted.

She nodded and then leaned her head forward and rested it against my stomach.

I don't know how long I stood there, holding her head as she held me tightly.

But I knew that I would stand there for however long it took.

She needed this moment.

And so finally, after I felt like enough time had passed, I finally whispered to her.

"When you're ready...we will talk. We have two weeks."

And for the first time she laughed...genuinely as she pulled back and looked up at me.

"Let's hope that it doesn't take me that long."

"Do you want to get it over with?"

My heart raced as I waited for her answer.

She looked really nervous now.

But I could see it.

The truth was there...on her face and in her eyes.

She wanted to lean on me...rely on me.

I was trying to be patient.

What other choice was there?

Santana's POV

Brittany had been right.

I knew it.

But I needed that kick in the ass.

And so even though I wasn't ready...I needed to suck it the fuck up and be a good wife.

I needed Quinn more than I needed anyone in the world.

She was my everything and if I couldn't be real and honest with her...than I had failed somewhere down the line.

I had asked for us to be honest with each other, to not bring Britt in the middle and I turned around and did it myself.

I was wrong.

But it's never too late to fix things.

We sat in the back of a sushi restaurant, both ready to talk.

Neither willing to go first.

But then...this was about me...she was probably waiting for me.

And from the looks of it...she would wait forever.

I reached across the table and took her hands into mine.

My skin still felt hot but the coolness of her hands seemed to fix that.

It was like a sign.

She balanced me out.

It's what my therapist said.

And Britt too.

Mami had even known it...even before all of this...she would point to Quinn and tell me that she was the one to build my world around.

That she would protect me to the death.

Even if we had gone to blows a few times.

Mami was sure of it.

I fought it for so long...thinking that it was Britt that I needed but as time went by...I saw that Mami had been right.

Being away from Quinn made me lose control faster.

"I've been sick...well...kind of. I'm not dying or anything...at least not yet." I smiled but her face was super serious. She was trying not to speak...she was waiting for me again.

I hated that my brain worked this way.

These days, it had been harder to focus.

"Santana...I'm asking. Please, what's wrong? I'm here...no matter what...I promise."

I smiled and dropped my head before taking a deep breath and looking back at her.

She looked scared.

That was definitely an emotion that I was familiar with it.

My control was slipping but I needed to be present.

I needed to be here with her.

"When I was in Louisville...things got bad...it's part of the reason that I left. The shrinks down there thought I was schizo...but I talked to my dad and he told me to come home. So I did...and the shrinks in Louisville were wrong. I was put on antidepressants though...I stopped taking them when I got to New York. I was okay...a little unattached but okay. Things started to fall apart again when Britt had her accident and my parents were worried, of course...before our second road trip...my dad took my gun away. He thought I was going to kill myself." She had tears in her eyes...but I continued. "After that episode that I had...in the beach house...right before I disappeared..."

"When you hit me."

"Yea...when I hit you...I started seeing another shrink. Papi threatened me when I admitted to hitting you and scratching up my arms...he was going to have me admitted. I think he was seeing what those shrinks in Louisville were seeing. Anyway...the new shrinks talked to the old shrinks...and I finally got diagnosed correctly."

"Okay, what is it?"

"I have Dissociative Identity Disorder." I finally said in one rushed breath.

And then I waited.

Watched and waited.

She smiled.

I swear to you, Quinn Fabray smiled like the fucking Grinch.

"Split personalities?"

"Yea...just one other."

"And you both are in love me, right?"

I couldn't help but laugh through my tears.

Her vanity never takes a vacation.

"Yes."

"Good."

She nodded and then sat back and nodded to herself.

She was not taking this how I expected.

Britt had been right.

I was overthinking and worrying too much.

"Q? Say something."

"Wow...I'm sorry, it's just that this explains...so much." She said as she looked at me in shock.

"Does it?" I said feeling confused.

"Oh baby, it does and if that's it...if that's what we are up against...I'm in this with you. Even when I'm not able to physically be with you...I'm here. You aren't alone in this. Not ever again...okay?"

Relief.

"Oh my God." I rested my head in my hands and started crying. "You..." I whispered. "That's so good..."

She slid into the booth next to me and wrapped an arm around me.

"Shhh...I'm here...just breathe...I'm here now...okay."

I rested against her and just cried into her neck.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop...don't do that." She scolded.

"I am, Q...I'm really fucking sorry."

"I know baby. I know."

A/N: There you go.

Oh and I don't think that I'm done for the day...want another one?

I think that you people are way too spoiled! ;)

-A