He couldn't take it any longer. If she opened her mouth one more time, it was out the window. Out the window, down, till she crashed to her death like last time.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw it.

Her mouth.

Her lips.

They were opening, a syllable on the tip of her tongue.

No. Please, no. If there is some divine power out there, here my prayers! Don't let her speak! Not another word! Please, please! He couldn't plead hard enough in his own mind, though on the outside he remained cool. He didn't want her to know how hard he was trying to not strangle her. He was in control, cool, stoic. He could handle it. Just as long as she doesn't say another word.

"Hey, you." She smirked, twirling a long strand of cinnamon hair around her finger, leaning back over his lap to present her chest to him, draping herself all over him. She giggled. "What's up, lollypop?"

That was it. He was going to kill himself, or her, whichever came first. He, frankly, didn't care. "Get… off… of… me…"

She pouted. "Aw, no fun! Why?" Suddenly, an idea seemed to come to her. "You know, I'm sort of like a bird. I'm pretty and I have orange hair and I can kind of caw. Listen! Caw, caw, caw! Rawr! That last one was a dinosaur. They're extinct. Exticnt is a funny word, don't you think? Like stink and existence all smashed up together. Maybe that's what it means. A stinky existence, like they have none. Because they don't. Well, they did, but then they all died. I was a movie where there were dinosaurs and they weren't-"

The door flew open then, in trooping back up.

He had never before been so glad to see them in all his life.

"Thank you!" He cheared, leaping up from the couch, dumping the girl onto the ground in the process. He ran for the door, intent on leaving.

"Not so fast, Ishida."

Yes. Uryuu Ishida had lost his cool. Why? It was all because of the person they had all so lovingly come to refer to as Talkihime.

Orihime, bless her soul, had left her body in their care. And Rukia's knew soul replacement pill was… awful. All of them had the same personality. They were working on getting new ones, but for the time the Women's Society in the serietie had oh-so conveniently gone out of stock. In reality, the woman were probably getting a hoot out of seeing the group try to put up with the replacement soul.

The joke hadn't been funny to begin with on their end.

"Who's shift is it?" Uryuu asked frantically, eger to get out of the apartment. "I'm done! I've been here a whole hour!" Yes. He was actually freaking out. No one had thought that he would so easily be cracked. But Talkihime could crack anyone.

"I just got off." Rukia nervously defended, lifting her hands up in the air. "It's not my turn!"

"I... went." Chad said, not needing to elaborate. They all felt bad, but he had been the one to take her for three hours strait, just before Rukia had come to relieve him for an hour.

That left one man.

Everyone slowly turned to Ichigo, who's arms were loaded with groceiries, as he and Rukia had been shopping. Chad had met up with them about a black form Orihime's apartment, their current operations center, so to speak. He had come with them then, already having been on his way over to see if Uryuu had lost it yet.

Rukia looked at him with a smirk, mirrored by Uryuu. Chad looked at him as if he were a dead man, but nothing could be done for him.

"Ichigo." They all said at once, looking at him in expectance.

"M-me?! I went five hours ago! I haven't had enough time yet!" He had lasted a whole two hours before calling chad, desperate, unable to carry out a day-shift like the original plan had been.

"Ha." Rukia grinned, leaning forward to lock eyes with him. "You know what this means. I get your bed tonight. You can sleep in the closet."

"W-w-what?! I have to babysit Talkihime and sleep in the closet."

"My my, Kuroaski." Ishida commented, smirking as he ushed up his glassed. "You make Miss Rukia sleep in your closet? You really are a brute."

"It's impolite." Chad added.

Rukia grinned wider, crossing her arms. Her internal score-board clicked: Ichigo- 23, Rukia- 44. She was in the lead, and not about to loose the little mini-battles they had been having for a while. She had to admit, though, she was starting to get a little worried. He hadn't done anything to set a point in the book for a while… which usually meant something big, bad, and funny only to him, at her expense, too, was probably coming.

She wasn't holding back anyway.

"What are you all talking about?" Everyone froze, breaking out in a cold sweat. They all turned, and in their little circle was…

Talkihime.

"I saw a huddle like this on the TV! It was called football. Big guys all huddled up, and then they threw around this ball! It was all American, whatever that is, and they were wearing funny outfits. Oh! And I saw something like that. It was with aliens. And the aliens were different colors. I want to be a different color. I wish I was pink. Do you think we could die this body pink? Actually, how about blue, because blue is the color of water and I like water more than I like bubble gum because water keeps you alive and bubble gum is only for chewing and it loses its flavor after, like, five minutes and that's not very good at all. But I saw a commercial on TV that was for gum that lasts for five hours. Maybe we could buy some? I think we could. We should go grocery shopping and get some and maybe while we're there we could get some beans. I want to train beans to jump, because there is such thing as a jumping been and I want to make a bunch. I would eat them, and then maybe there would be a little party in my stomach because they would all be jumping around! But then they would die. That's a little mean. Maybe we shouldn't get jumping beans. But because I want something jumpy we could get a jump rope! And I could jump rope a lot, because jump-roping is exercise, and exercise is good for the body. My body! Even if it's not mine. Yeah, it's that Orihime girl's, huh? Where is she, anyway? When is she coming back? And I think that she had a nice body, and she-"

"Make it stop!" Ichigo clapped his hands over his ears, turning to look at his friends for help.

They were gone.

Tacked to the door was a note.

Dear Ichigo,

You still suck at detecting other's spiritual pressure. We wrote a note and left and you didn't notice a single thing. It's pretty disgraceful. Anyway! Rukia will be back to pick you up after an hour, then Chad will take watch. Don't worry, only one more day of this and then it's back to school. Have fun!

Sign, Rukia and Uryuu

Then there was a doodle of a… bunny? A bunny/bear sticking out it's tongue. It might have been Rukia based on the hair. A… raccoon-fox-lemur-ferret… oh, maybe that was a badger… he didn't know. It had glasses and was smirking, so it was probably Uryuu… Then another note.

Sorry. –Chad

Yeah… it didn't really help… The another picture that he knew was him- a bunny/bear with spiky hair and a giant butter knife. He had swirls for eyes, and there was some sort of fox/mouse thing with boobs and long hair that had a speech bubble with a lot of "Blah, blah, blah"s in it. She hat sinister diamonds for eyes, an evil grin in place.

Yeah. Rukia was a very supportive girlfriend.

He didn't worry much about getting back at her. He had something big in mind.

"-but now I think that maybe I want to be a dancer instead, even though I can't really move that great, I think I just have a dancer's soul. But I don't really have a soul. Oh well! Actually, that's funny, because I'm a green pill. I wish I could be a different color. Sparkles, too. Yeah. A sparkly blue pill! With ribbons! And I would be the most pretty pill ever, except no one would be able to swallow me because of the ribbons, but that's okay because I think throats are gross anyway. I like them on the outside, I mean, and in general because they allow you to talk but inside is kind of gross, even if it's warm. Do you like it warm? I do. I wish I had a dress made out of blankets so I could just be warm all the time because I like being warm. I told you that. Funny, huh, cuz' I repeated myself? Yep! And you know what else repeats? Records. Vinal records. They get stuck and then it's just the same line over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and- Hey, did you hear that? I think the microwave beeped. Are you making something? Oh, never mind, it was just my imagination. I've got a really good imagination, too, you know, and I-"

It was best to just drone her out.

"How long do I have left?" Ichigo muttered, finally moving from the spot he had been molded to in order to drift to the couch. Talkihime followed him, plopping down beside him and continuing to prattle on.

He looked down at his watch.

"It's only been…" His eyebrow twitched. "Two minutes?!"

"What's been two minutes? Do you mean seven? Because there's this movie called seven minutes, and it was really good. I think I should have been in it, as the lead femal role, actually. I'm a natural actress. I think that I can do a little of everything, you know? A jack of all trades? No, that's weird, my name is not Jack. If I was a guy, maybe. No, if I was a guy I would want my name to be Sam John Luke Brian Don Will Jack. It's American. I like American names, you know? They sound so funny. Like Smith. Su-miii-tthhhhh. Weird, right? Yeah. But that's okay, because-"

Ichigo was sure he wasn't going to survive.

Whevere Orihime was, he and the rest hope that she came back, soon.

"Oh! Pizza! That's an American word, right? Peeeeet-zuuuuu. Hahaha, it sounds like beetle!"

He wouldn't comment that pizza didn't sound like beetle. It was best not to encourage her.

"Oh, hey, I just thought of something! I could be a singer! Listen to this song I wrote in my mind!"

Ichigo couldn't remember when an hour had become an eternity.

Ulquiorra better bring her back soon. We're all about to go crazy. Crazy. That sounds like Mazy. Funny-

Oh.

It's contagious. I'm catching the Talkihime disease.

Indeed, it seemed that Orihime need to come back very, very soon.

.

Figured we should check in with the World Of The Living, real quick. Plus, I hadn't written anything for today, so I had to whip something up really fast, and this was the first thing that came to mind. Sorry for all the Ichigo and Rukia-ness, I know you all came here to read about Orihime and Ulquiorra, but I couldn't help myself. I love those two together.
So, read and review for your local review whore! Yes, yes, I realize that is what I am. And... *sigh* I am resigned to this fate. *tear* XD Thanks to all who have stuck with me so far, I really apriciate it. And ideas, suggestions, complaints, and comments are welcome. PLEASE let me know if this starts to get OCC. I promise my feelings will not be hurt, it will actually help me. And! Point things out that you don't like, or don't make sense. I like to try and explain why I did these things, plus it makes it so that I can improve the writing if it isn't how I intended it. Thanks again everyone! Sorry for the short-ness lately. (Yes, this author's not WAS Talkihime status. They all are...)