Attention: I have decided to write the remainder of the story from the point of view of an omniscient narrator rather than switch between Finn and Rachel. I have been really struggling to capture both of their reactions and feelings at the same time, and thought this would be the best solution. I hope this makes sense…

I do not own Glee. Title from "Take a Bow" by Rihanna

Finn was lying on his tiny, twin-size bed, relaxing after a difficult practice when he heard his phone ringing. Usually, this wouldn't be strange since his mom was constantly calling to check up on him or JJ wanted to see if he would go out, but this was different. This was playing a special ring tone dedicated specifically to Rachel, and he hadn't heard it in months. Finn looked at the clock confusedly, because if he did the math correctly, that would make it nearly 2 AM in New York right now, and the Rachel he knew never stayed up that late.

Before he thought about it too much longer, he pressed accept and took a deep breath, preparing himself for hearing her voice again.

"Hello?" Finn answered in an apprehensible tone.

"Finn? Is that you?" Rachel was screaming into the phone and she sounded like she was in a really crowded place.

"Rach, I'm here." He responded. H had no clue what to say considering she was the one calling him.

"Oh gooood! I haven't talked to you in foreverrrr." She had clearly moved to a place that was less populated because Finn could actually hear her this time. Another thing that was apparent to him was the fact that she was wasted. He has seen Rachel wasted a total of two times: once at her house party junior year, and once when his parents were out of town and Kurt decided they needed to have a dinner party with him and Blaine. Needless to say, that got out of hand real quickly.

"Rachel, are you drunk?" He asked the question already knowing the answer, but wanted to hear her say it—she never like to admit to being drunk.

She giggled a little and hiccupped—yes definitely smashed. "Maybe…but that's not why I'm calling Finn! I got a bone to pick with you!" She sounded determined, and he almost laughed at how cute she must look with her face all scrunched up. Although it scared him when she got mad, she also looked adorably sexy while yelling, so he was okay with her dramtics.

"Ok…I'm listening." Finn replied carefully, not exactly knowing where she was going with this. What could he have possibly done from nearly 3,000 miles away?

"Are we still together?" Okay 'wow', he thought, getting right to it. He supposes that is a pretty good reason to be upset at him. But, before Finn could answer, Rachel rambled on quickly. "Cause, you know, I was just making out with this totally random guy, and I was thinking to myself, 'am I cheating right now or what?' and I thought about it and I realized that probably not since we haven't talked in forever, and boyfriends and girlfriends usually talk everyday, and fiancés probably talk even more, so I was just wondering what we are cause you just kinda left and now I don't know what you're doing or if you are with some—".

Her rambling was cut short by her yelling and a big crashing sound, and then the phone went dead. Finn figured that she fell, being so drunk and all, and dialed her phone number back to make sure she was fine. He called a total of five times when he realized that she probably dropped her phone in the fall and it was either broken or lost. Sure he was kind of upset that she had just told him she was making out with another guy, but he still worried about her. And, it was his fault since he sort of left things really uncertain. He looked through his contacts and found the one he wanted, tapping the 'call' button.

"Uhg. This better be an emergency." Finn heard Kurt's sleepy voice come from the other side, realizing he was not with Rachel. This kind of made him more panicked because that meant she was either with Santana (not good!) or with people he didn't know (even worse!).

"Kurt, it's Finn. Is Santana with Rachel?"

There was a bit of shuffling and a pause before Kurt answered. "Uh no. Why are you calling, Finn?" He didn't sound angry, but more like he confused why Finn would call in the middle of the night to ask where Rachel was. Considering he hasn't spoken to any of them in while, it seemed strange that he would be calling now, however Finn was nervous knowing Rachel was out drunk with God knows who. She didn't sound like the Rachel Finn left behind—kissing random guys in clubs and drinking till she couldn't stand straight.

"Rachel just called me, but then she must have fallen down or something because the phone went dead. I just wanted to make sure she was okay and safe. She sounded really drunk…"

"Oh fuck." Kurt mumbled quietly. He shouted for Santana to 'wake the hell up', and the muscles in Finn's stomach clenched tighter. Santana wasn't with her. "Thanks Finn. We will take care of it." With that, Kurt hung up and left Finn completely in the dark about the situation. He tried calling back multiple times but each time, it went straight to voicemail. Finn decided that he could just call back in the morning.

Finn struggled to go to sleep that night because he kept picturing Rachel being mauled by another guy. It made him want to kick something so badly. He knew he had no right to be angry or jealous since he hadn't talked to her since he walked out, but he couldn't help it. Finn was so used to the fact that Rachel was his that thinking about another man touching her, loving her, and making her happy made him physically ill. So much so that he had to keep a trash can by the side of his bed just in case anything came up in the middle of the night.

The next day, Finn attempted to call Santana and Kurt for an update on Rachel's whereabouts, but they had either turned off their phones or kept hitting ignore. He was frustrated with them, frustrated with Rachel, and especially frustrated with himself. He was releasing some of this anger and frustration on his desk chair when JJ walked in.

"Hey, dude, what did the chair ever do to you?" He said it in a joking manner, but Finn wasn't really in a joking mood.

"Sorry." Finn mumbled out before sitting down on his bed and calling Rachel one last time, even though he knew it was in vain and he wouldn't get an answer. He wondered what the hell was up her, and was getting angrier and angrier with her at each passing moment.

"Whatever. So, I was planning on heading over to the football house soon. You in? We could take your mind off of whatever had you kicking chairs, and cross a few things off the list while we're at it." JJ was grinning as he said this, and Finn always found it hard to refuse him when he did this. He wasn't the coolest or smoothest guy, but he was a great friend and funny to watch around girls. He somehow managed to repel every girl he walked up to at these parties, and Finn felt badly for him. JJ just got really nervous in front of a hot girl and said the stupidest, most random shit, like 'do you like beets?'. Who asks a girl if they like beets at a party? Simply thinking about JJ girl troubles made Finn forget his own. He didn't want to think about Rachel Berry and her love life any more.

"Yeah, sure. Someone's got to help you get laid. You've been trying for months, man." Finn laughed as he shoved him a bit.

"Hey! It's not like you've gotten lucky since we've been here either!" JJ pushed back, but he is so much smaller than Finn that it didn't really do much.

"Yeah, but that's intentional, man. I don't think you have been trying not to get laid." Finn laughed again, thinking that he should try to change that. Rachel seems to be moving on, and the whole point of leaving was to find himself. How could he do that if the last memory he had of something intimate was Rachel?

JJ began to go on about how this would be the night and so on and so forth. Finn loved how optimistic and excited he got just talking about the possibilities that tonight may bring, even when he probably wasn't going to get very lucky. He kind of reminded Finn of someone, but he didn't want to think about her tonight. He was going out to have a good time, cross something off the list, and forget about his past.

He was hammered. Plain and simple. He was absolutely, 100% incredibly drunk. Finn was having difficulties standing upright and talking, and girls were throwing themselves at him, clearly seeing that he was vulnerable. Usually, Finn just stuck to playing beer pong with the boys and stayed away from the girls, always having Rachel in the back of his mind. However, tonight, he was actually really enjoying the attention he was receiving from the nearly nude women in front of him.

"Duuude!" JJ came up to him and gave him a high five, impressed at his current situation. Finn had two girls hanging onto him, kissing his neck and pulling on his arms to take him upstairs "You should totally cross off number 11 on the Puck list!"

Thirty minutes later…

Finn was lying completely spent, and still drunk, on an unfamiliar bed in the football house. The girls had left as soon as he had finished, but he was exhausted and stayed behind for a little bit after. He was still wobbly and wondered if JJ was here to take him home. It was already almost 4 am and they had practice at 6 am. He silently groaned thinking about having to run and lift in two hours, and vowed to lay off of the partying for a while and focus on football and school when it started.

He reached for his phone to call JJ, hoping he had crashed here last night instead of try to walk home in his drunken state. Finn could barely see the phone screen clearly in his drunken haze, and just pressed the most recent call, assuming that's who he talked to last.

As soon as the line picked up, he breathed a sigh of relief that JJ was still alive and able to pick up the phone.

"Thank God, JJ! I thought you'd be dead after last night! I'd just like to say that I can now cross off #11 on the list. Who knew having a threesome would be so exhausting; it is so much work being the guy." He was slurring his words a little drunkenly. He laughed at what he said, but when he didn't hear a congratulating response, he got confused. "Uh, JJ? You there?"

"No Finn, JJ is not here, but I'm glad that you're enjoying completing Puck's list." Rachel's voice rang through the phone and Finn's heart stopped. She was sitting in the kitchen with Santana and Kurt, eating breakfast when she got the call. She almost didn't answer, but finally decided to last minute because obviously Finn was worried about her. How wrong she was…

Before she could hang up, Finn shouted through the phone. "Wait! Please don't hang up!"

Rachel didn't say anything but she didn't hang up either. She was pissed at him, but she wanted to hear what he had to say and how he was get out of this situation. Kurt and Santana had perked up when they realized she was talking to Finn and was mad at whatever he had said. They made her turn the phone on speaker so they could hear the conversation.

Once Finn realized she didn't hang up and he had a chance to speak, he continued. "Rachel, I've been trying to reach you to make sure you were okay after last night. I..I'm so sorry you heard that." He mumbled the last part under his breath, but she heard it anyways.

Kurt gave Santana a questioning glance, neither of them knowing that Finn had just admitted to having a threesome to Rachel. Rachel, for her part, let out a long sigh. She didn't want to cry because she was pissed at him, and he didn't deserve to hear how hurt she was. "I'm fine Finn." Though everyone could tell she was anything but. "And clearly you are having so much fun in California, so it pretty much answers my question from last night about what we mean to each other. Here I was, thinking I was cheating by making out with a guy when you are having sex with two girls at the same time. Silly me!" Rachel's voice rising with every word she spoke, and by the end she was yelling.

"Congratulations, by the way, I know that's what you were looking for from this JJ person. Noah would be so proud of all of your accomplishments." The sarcasm was dripping from her voice, and for some reason, the mention of Puck really pissed Finn off.

"Fuck you, Rach! You have no idea what Puck would think because you didn't even know him. He fuckin' died for you, and you didn't even know him like I did! He fuckin' died trying to save you!" The words were out of Finn's mouth before he could really process what he had said, and even in his drunken haze, he knew what he said was bad.

Rachel's face went white and her entire body began to shake, causing her to drop the phone. She remained rooted to the spot, silently sobbing, and only moved when Kurt took her hand and pulled her to the bathroom. Santana watched her friend—best friend—walk away completely broken, and lost it.

Santana picked up the phone and began yelling in Spanish before finally switching to English so Finn understood her. "I don't care if you're hurting, Hudson! We are all fucking hurting! There is absolutely no excuse for what you just said to Rachel. None. You already hurt her so much, and now you go and do this? I don't…I have nothing to say to you. Never, and I mean never, contact Rachel again…or me for that matter. I don't think she will ever be able to get over this…" Santana's voice was slow, calculated, and cold, and as soon as she said it, she hung up. She couldn't believe that the Finn she knew, the Finn who was so completely and utterly in love with Rachel Berry just said that to her. Does he have any idea how much guilt she already felt? Hearing it from someone that is really close to you hurts even more. Santana began to worry that Rachel wouldn't be able to come back from this…

Finn fell back onto the bed and closed his eyes, running through his conversation with Rachel. He cannot believe he just said that to her. He was drunk and upset about her kissing someone else, but he just made it a trillion times worse. He did not blame Rachel for Puck's death; he blamed himself. If he had made Puck stay in that room with Mike, he would still be here. But because Finn didn't, every single time he saw Rachel he couldn't help but see the scene in the hallway all over again; when Rachel and Puck got shot. He still has nightmares about that most nights, and he didn't want a reminder while he was awake.

He knew Santana was right. He might have really screwed Rachel up, and he hated himself for that. All he could do now was do as Santana said and stay out of her life permanently. Puck's goals were supposed to make Finn better, not worse. If Puck had any idea that he was doing these things, he would kill him. It was too late to make it right with Rachel, but Finn could still make Puck proud. It was time for him to stop messing around and finally become a man.

That was exactly what he did. Finn put all of his effort and focus into school and football, trying to be the best he could be at both. It was early November now, and Finn was the starting quarterback for the UC Santa Barbara Gouchos. They had already won more than twice as many games as the team did last year (8!), and although they weren't going to make it to playoffs, it was still quite the achievement.

The classes were hard, but thankfully, the football team hires tutors for all of the freshmen to ease them into college academics. Initially, Finn thought his dream of becoming a doctor ended before it even began after seeing the classes he had to take. Biology, chemistry, calculus, and Latin were just some of the subjects required to get an undergrad in premed. He remembered back to biology in high school, and got scared because he would not have done as well as he did without Rachel's help. However, Finn realized that if he actually worked hard, completed the assignments, and asked for help, it was totally doable and really interesting.

Like, did you know the chicken pox is a form of herpes? Finn told this to JJ, who found it so fascinating that now he explains all of the interesting facts he learns to him. JJ is a computer design major, but because he thinks it's pretty cool, Finn tells him about everything he's learning, which was the best form of studying. So now, whether JJ wants to hear about the respiratory system or not, Finn recites all of his material to him before a big exam. It seems to work out well since he currently has a B+ in biology and an A- in Organic chemistry, two of the hardest classes on campus.

While Finn loves doing well in school and football, his mind does wander to a tiny brunette girl in New York City quite frequently. He hasn't attempted to make contact with her since the last call, and has only heard from Kurt through short, clipped text messages. Finn figures they all have a right to be mad at him for the awful things he said to Rachel, he just wishes he had a friend (other than JJ) to talk to.

His mom called soon after the whole incident asking what happened. Apparently, Kurt had contacted her to say he would not be accompanying them to visit Finn, and she was confused and worried. Finn simply explained that he said something he shouldn't have and his friends were mad at him, trying to downplay the seriousness of the falling out. After that, Carole stopped asking about it, but was worried about Finn since he didn't have anyone to talk to. When he reminded her of JJ, she said that she meant he didn't have any Glee friends to talk to. Glee friends are different from regular friends. They are so much more.

He didn't want to, but Finn reminded his mother that there really aren't many Glee friends left, and considering three wouldn't talk to him, that only left Mike. Carole got really silent and sniffled at the remainder of the deaths, immediately making Finn regret saying that. Before he could apologize though, she was giving him Mike's new phone number and telling him to call him to make sure he was doing well. So, that's what Finn did.

"Hello?" Mike's voice answered in confusion. Finn breathed a sign of relief that his mother had given him the correct number.

"Um hey Mike, it's me, Finn." He wasn't quite sure what to say since he hasn't seen or talked to Mike since the funeral five months ago.

"Hey Finn!" He was happy to hear from Finn. He had heard what had happened between him and Rachel from Santana, and although he was dissapointed in Finn, Mike knew he needed some support from his old friends. "What's up? I heard you're in California. I've been meaning to call you up so we could get together, but I've been so busy with school and dance."

"Wait, you live in California?" Finn was so confused since he thought Mike was going to the Joffrey ballet school in Chicago.

"Yeah. I guess we think alike because I wanted to get away too. I decided to come to Stanford to earn a double degree in business and dance. I heard you're at UC Santa Barbara. That's like 5 hours away, so we should totally catch up sometime."

They talked for quite a while before hanging up and planning to see each other over winter break since neither one of them was going home. They both realized that it was nice to talk to someone who knows you, really knows you. However, it also made Finn miss his friends (alive and dead alike) more than he has in a long while. He really wondered how Kurt, Santana, and especially Rachel were doing. Hopefully living their dreams in New York…

"We need to talk." Kurt said as soon as Rachel came into the apartment early Saturday morning. He looked at her carefully and frowned. She was an absolute mess. Her hair was long, limp, and straggly, she has lost too much weight, her clothes were horrible (worse than normal), and falling off her skinny body.

Rachel looked at Kurt in exasperation and annoyance while still trying to catch her breath. She had just run 7 miles and was tired, wet, and cold. It was early December and the weather was dreadful, so all she wanted to do was take a long, hot shower, and then lounge around in sweats the remainder of the day. It was the same thing she wanted to do everyday since the fateful phone call from Finn almost three months ago. But, apparently that was not going to be happening anytime soon because by the look on Kurt's face, she knew this was a serious talk.

"What?" Rachel asked innocently as she went to grab a bottle of water from the kitchen.

"You know what, Rachel Barbara Berry! You have been depressed for the past three months and refuse to talk about what Finn said to you. What you are doing is so unhealthy, Rachel! You barely sleep or eat, and all you do is run and study. You look dreadful, and I cannot let you continue on this destructive path any longer. I am putting my foot down and making you talk about this right now, or I'm going to call you fathers."

As soon as he pulled the father card, he knew he had Rachel. She really didn't want to make them worry about her more than they already did, and if they saw her right now, they would certainly be worried.

"Fine" She said as they sat on the couch facing each other. Neither of them said anything for a long while, waiting for the other to start. Finally, Kurt took a deep breath and started.

"Rachel, I shouldn't have to tell you this, but I feel like you need to hear it. Finn was wrong. He was drunk and sad, and he was so totally wrong, and he knows it too. You did not cause Puck's death. That murderer pulled the trigger and is responsible for every single death in that school that day. You did not kill him." Kurt repeated the words multiple times to get his point across. He placed his hands on Rachel's boney shoulders and looked into her sad eyes intently, willing her to believe him.

Rachel closed her eyes, letting a few tears escape before speaking. "Kurt, I know I didn't pull the trigger, but Finn was right. He wouldn't have been there if it wasn't for me. He was trying to protect me! How can I not blame myself?"

"Sweetie, I don't know how else to say this, but it was not your fault. You did not kill him; you helped and believed in him. Puck made that decision to help find you because he loved you and he wanted to make sure you were all right. You left a deep impression on him with your kindness and belief. He made that decision, knowing exactly what was at stake. The gunman made the decision to shoot both of you, and he died. Living is not your fault, so don't feel guilty about it. If anything, you should feel guilty for wasting your life away now. I bet Puck would be rolling in his grave right if he saw what a mess you are right now. I know, I know, that he would want you to be happy and live your life like you always dreamed. So, we are going to get you back on track, deal?" He hoped to God he could get Rachel back. This was his last hope before calling her dads. Kurt and Santana had been trying since that morning, but nothing seemed to get through to her. Seeing a little recognition in her eyes let him know he had finally gotten through, even if it was just a little bit.

Rachel nodded her head, unable to talk. She thought about how true what Kurt said really was. She needed to stop letting the gunman win and let him take away her life. That's what he would have wanted; to break her—all of them—but Rachel was not going to let that happen. She was Rachel Berry, and she was going to become a star.

That was almost a month ago, and it was now almost winter break. Rachel had gotten her shit together, and decided to try out for an off off-Broadway show called Reasons to Live (kind an ironic title, but she went with it). Although it was not a leading part and it wasn't Broadway, she was proud and excited about getting her first paying job. It was a very dark and dramatic musical about a homeless family and there life on the street—Rachel's character eventually commits suicide. It was not a good show, but it did get some attention, albeit almost all negative except for compliments for Rachel's voice. That really made her feel good even if the music was shitty; all that mattered to her was exposure and experience.

Rachel had been pretty lucky that she was playing a homeless teenager though, because she was still a mess when she went to audition. They figured she was already in character and she just let them believe that, not wanting to admit that she hadn't put any effort into looking so horrible. Kurt was pissed that her "horrid and ghastly look" had actually gotten her a job. He was planning on helping her get back to her pre-depression pretty self, however, once she got the part, she was required to stay fairly thin and keep her hair in the same ratty style so she truly did look homeless.

She swore she had been practicing for this role this whole time, and not depressed like Kurt and Santana originally thought. They had a good laugh about that, and it was really good for all of them to finally laugh again. She still felt pangs of guilt, but it was just something she would live with forever. They will all have survivor's remorse and regrets about that day, but they have to continue living because their friends didn't even get the chance.

With that in mind, Kurt and Santana really focused on finding a profession that really enjoyed. Kurt discovered a serious passion for hair and was currently going to the Paul Mitchell hair school to become the best hairdresser this world has ever seen. He often tries to make Santana and Rachel his Guiney pigs, but they usually refuse. At least not until he passes cutting and coloring 101. One time, only a week into his schooling, he begged and begged Santana to let him trim her hair, so she finally relented and let him with the condition that he only cut an inch. Needless to say, a huge argument broke out because what Kurt considers an inch, Santana considers three. It looked pretty good, especially for his first haircut, but it was the fact that he didn't listen to her that pissed her off the most. She would not be getting in his chair again for a while.

Rachel, on the other hand, desperately needed Kurt to give her a haircut since she hadn't taken good care of her hair since leaving Lima. Unfortunately, her show required her to keep her hair the same and she could get fired if she changed it. He reminded her every morning that as soon as the musical ended, he was going to town on her hair, and she agreed. She just hoped when that time came, he actually knew what he was doing.

Santana was happily working as a makeup artist in the same salon in which Kurt is apprenticing. She enjoys makeup and it allows her to be creative, but it is definitely not what she plans to be for the rest of her life. She will continue doing it to play for food and clothes while still finding out what her dream job is.

March 2013

The day before spring break, Carmen Tibideaux called Rachel to her office to discuss "something of the upmost importance"—Carmen's exact words. This scared the shit out of Rachel because she really didn't want to get kicked out of NYADA. She'll admit, she has let some of her classes fall to the wayside—getting A- instead of A's—but she has a good excuse. She has been so incredibly busy with the off-Broadway show, and wasn't the whole purpose of NYADA to prepare students for working. She just one step ahead, right?

"Hello Miss Berry." Carmen Tibideaux said as she strolled into her office.

"Hello Ms. Tibiteaux." She replied nervously.

Carmen gave her a stern look and Rachel prepared herself for getting kicked out. "I wanted to talk to you about your show. I have seen it, and although it is a disaster, you are pretty brilliant in it, managing to make it somewhat bearable." She gave Rachel a tight smile, which she returned. She wanted to shriek! Ms. Tibiteaux thought Rachel was the best thing about the show?

Before she had time to celebrate in her head, Carmen went on. "I have a friend who is looking for a young woman to star in his Broadway revival of Cabaret. He figured that NYADA would have some talented, fresh young starlets and asked if I had anyone in mind. I was thinking of recommending you." At this, Rachel's eyebrows rose about a foot and her mouth hung wide open. Carmen looked at her seriously. "You would still have to go through the audition process, I would just get you the initial audition. I want to make sure you are able to handle this before I do it though. It is my name going on the line here, and I can't have you choking again."

Rachel sat there silently until she realized Carmen was looking for some reassurance. "Oh, yes! I learned my lesson and will never choke again. I will be ready and won't let you down Ms. Tibideaux." Rachel shook her hand firmly and then walked out of the door with the information for the audition. She could not wait to get home and tell Kurt and Santana!

"Kurt! Santana!" Rachel yelled as soon as she got home.

"What?" Santana shouted from her room.

"Where's Kurt?" Rachel asked. She didn't want to tell Santana without Kurt or else he would kill her.

"I'm here! What's all this yelling about?" Kurt replied as he came out of the bathroom with his green facemask on. He was annoyed that Rachel would interrupt his facial time.

"Sorry! I just have something important to tell you guys! Okay, so you know how I was freaking out because I had to talk to Carmen Tibideaux today?" They both nodded their heads because, yeah, they knew all right. Rachel has only been talking about it all week and crying about the possibility of getting kicked out. "Anyways, I went to see her and she said that she has gotten me an audition for a real Broadway musical!"

"Oh my God!" They both screamed at the same time and they were soon hugging and jumping up and down in joy together.

"It's for the Broadway revival of Cabaret!" Rachel shouted out above their squeals

"Holy fuck! That's, like, a real show, Berry!" Santana said with her eyes wide open and her smile huge.

"Oh my God! Oh my God!" Kurt repeated over and over again. His best friend could be Sally Bowles! "Who's the director?" Kurt said after they finally calmed down.

"Uh, you know, I have no idea. I just ran out of there as soon as she told me when and where the audition was. I guess I'll find out in three weeks, but it really doesn't matter as long as it's Broadway…" As Rachel said Broadway, her eyes glazed over and she pictured herself standing on stage in front of thousands of people who were giving her a standing ovation.

"Okay! We need to get you ready!" Kurt said clapping his hands excitedly.

"Yeah. You cannot go in there looking like that and expect to get the role of a beautiful, sexy, talented cabaret singer." Santana said as she eyed Rachel's appearance up and down.

"But what about my contract for my current play? It says I can't change my appearance in any permanent way or else I'll get fired. I can't afford to get fired if I don't have a job secured." Rachel said this nervously. She really needed to show the director and producers that she could look the part, but how could change without getting fired?

Kurt looked at her with a pensive gaze. "Okay, here's what we do. We will give you a complete Sally Bowles makeover—clothes, hair, and make-up—and then if you don't get the part, we just put in extensions. The rest won't be so obvious, so you will still have a job. But believe me, you will get the part in Cabaret and will never have to play a homeless girl again." Kurt was smiling at as he said this, thinking of all the details they would need to complete in the next three weeks.

There were three steps in the transformation process:

The first step was eating and exercising more healthily, which they implemented immediately. They had three weeks to get Rachel's sexy body back. Rachel had still been really skinny and not eating properly to keep up with her current role. Now, Kurt and Santana made sure she ate three full meals a day and had healthy snacks to take to the theatre in between acts. She also started to lighten up her running, going from 8-5 miles every morning to 2-4 miles and adding in abs and muscle strengthening exercises. She needed to be in tip-top shape for the role, with curves and sex appeal, not boney and weak. This also helped bring back the light in her eyes and the glow to her skin. Rachel was finally healthy, beautiful, and alive again.

The second step was to buy some new clothes. Most of the clothes she had now were oversized sweats and holey t-shirts—not exactly sexy. If she was going to play a sexy and strong woman, she needed to feel like one, so Kurt and Santana took her shopping. She still had some of her cuter dresses, skirts, and animal-print sweaters; they just didn't make up her entire closet. Now she could pair any one of those old articles with a new piece, and look really fashionable and sexy, but still like Rachel Berry.

The last step was a haircut, which they were doing today—the day before the audition—because her play was closed on Monday's and she was taking off tomorrow for the audition. This way, her current director wouldn't see the changes and fired her.

They were currently in the Paul Mitchell hair salon, where Kurt and Santana work. Kurt has been apprenticing for almost 5 months now, and he was a hairprodigy. He was flying through every technique with easy and precision, and might even get his own chair and clients by summertime. This was practically unheard of in the business! It usually took at least 18 months to earn an actual position on the floor, but Paul Mitchell was Kurt's personal teacher and he was majorly impressed with his raw talent.

Although Kurt was on his way to becoming a fabulous hairdresser, Rachel was still scared.

"Kurt…I'm really nervous." Rachel said, staring at her reflection in the mirror. Kurt gave her a sad look that made her go on. "Oh no! Not because you are cutting my hair! I know that you're great! I mean, look at Santana's hair! You did a wonderful job." Rachel smiled at Kurt to reassure him that that wasn't what made her nervous. "It's just that..I've always had long hair and this would be a really big change."

Normally, Sally Bowles (the role Rachel was auditioning for) had very short hair, either in a pixie style or chin length bob. Currently, Rachel's hair came down to the middle of her back and she hasn't had short hair since she was like 2. It was apart of her and loosing it was a big deal to her.

Kurt ran his fingers through her hair, playing with different styles in his mind. "I don't think we should go so drastic. I mean, God forbid you don't get this role, you would have cut off your beautiful hair for no reason. I think we should cut it just above the shoulders with some choppy, long layers and framing around your face. It will show the director that you can be sexy and sophisticated, but still playful and young."

Rachel looked at Santana for support, wanting to know if she should really go through with the cut. "Agreed. Berry, your hair is a disaster right now with all of those split and dead ends. If you don't get the part, at least you will look good, right?" Santana was smiling as she joked, but she really did think Rachel could get the part. She had youtubed the musical multiple times in the past three weeks, and Rachel would be a great Sally Bowles.

"Okay!" Rachel shouted, equal parts excited and nervous. "But, since it's so much hair, I want to donate it to Locks of Love so cancer patients can get wigs made out of. I'm sure I have 12 inches to donate." Not only could this haircut be good for her future career, but it could help people, making Rachel that much more sure it was the right decision.

Kurt made the big cut, placing the long ponytail in a plastic bag so it could be sent to the organization. Once the initial cut was made, Rachel felt more excited than nervous, and couldn't wait to see what she looked like when he was finished. She already felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders, and it literally had. But, it was so much more than that. She realized during all of this that she hasn't gotten her hair cut in a year, meaning this hair was there with her through all the heartbreak and devastation.

Not that her hair actually carried that around, but in a figurative sense, it was true. It reminded her that she hasn't really moved on as much as she thought. Until recently, she had tried holding on to her past in an unhealthy manner. Now she had the chance to start fresh and really begin living her life like she was born to. Whether she dresses or looks the same as she did when life was carefree and all of her friends were alive didn't matter; she would always keep them in her heart. Change is good as long as it makes you better, and this was definitely for the better.

Kurt was finally done, and when he turned her around, Rachel's eyes got huge in shock.

"Wow…" was all she could manage at the moment. Once she moved past the initial shock, she finally broke out into a smile. "It's perfect, Kurt! Thank you so much! I love it!" She shook her head, letting her hair move and flow around her. It brushed her shoulders and had long layers throughout that gave it a super sexy and sultry vibe. Kurt had cut long, face-framing bangs to the side, which made her mahogany eyes come alive and sparkle like they used to. Quite simply, Rachel looked hot and felt extremely confident when she walked into the audition the next day.

"Name!" A loud male voice echoed from the seats. He didn't even look up at the stage yet, which made Rachel annoyed, but she wasn't going to let it mess her up

"Rachel Berry" she said confidently and calmly.

Finally he looked up at her, and appraised her appearance. Mostly, he would take one look at the girl and tell her to leave, however, this one had something special about her. "Okay, very well. Begin."

Rachel took a deep, relaxing breath, and then nodded at the pianist to start.

"Maybe this time…"