Here's the food-fight chapter, as requested. :) Enjoy! Oh, and congratulations to The Wolf Of Cair Paravel for winning the 500th reviewer. I never thought we would make it this far. I love you all!
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Stark looked around the room and sighed, truly not understanding what was going on. Back when Aizen had ruled Los Noches, all the espada had to attend a tea maybe once every two months. And then it was a talk of war and strategies- of lies and schemes. So really, what was the point of this dinner?
Not only had it taken away from his evening nap-time, but it had also gotten Lillinette completely crazy and hyper with excitement. The girl had run all the way to Halibel's room- the two females had become very close since Aizen's fall, since the younger of the two saw Halibel as strong and calm, much how she saw Stark. Halibel had actually gone with Lillinette's wishes and braided the young girl's hair on the side her hollow mask didn't cover. The girl had rapidly chatted to the older woman about hollows and weapons and idiots and such. He hadn't really been paying attention- he was snoozing on Halibel's bed and breathing in her scent while the females had chatted.
He was sitting there at the long table, looking at all the food that had been set out. It all looked good, but taste… well, he was about to find out.
It seemed that ex-prisoner Orihime Inoue had prepared the feast, and while Halibel had assured him the woman held no grudge against the espada, after just hearing the names of some foods made him wonder if the human really had let it all go. He wouldn't blame her one bit if she was trying to poison them, but he wasn't actually going to let her do it.
He was just careful- cautious.
The girl, Orihime or something, was babbling on to Ulquiorra as he sat beside her. She was talking about robots and aliens, whatever those were, and cheerily prattling on about how she thought that an alien would actually fall in love with a robot for some reason or another.
Then again, it wasn't like the rest of the table was much more collected. Over at the end of the table Grimmjow and a shinigami woman were aggressively passing looks and elbow-jabs, their feet silently dueling beneath the table as they inhaled their meals. The other two shinigami in the room- the one who had almost killed Halibel and then another woman- were quietly making eye contact for short spans of time, the girl smiling while the boy tried to look frosty. They talked quietly to one another about thing he had no interest in- shinigami politics and such. Then there was the hollow-shinigami-human who had defeated Ulquiorra in battle and the small woman he was defiantly in love with. Those two were arguing about something called a 'chappy' and if such a thing should be allowed in the bedroom. He really didn't get it, and he decided that maybe it was best if he didn't know. Then there was Nelliel, who was back to her original size, and was exchanging pleasantries with Halibel, whom he sat beside. Lillinette was too busy stuffing herself silly to care that no one was talking to her.
In short- he was bored.
He pushed his food around his plate, just like most people in the room were doing. How Lillinette could stomach it he couldn't even being to fathom. Orihime- yeah, that was her name- was downing her own cooking like everything she touched was made entirely of chocolate. He watched in mild disgust as she swallowed a piece of Ham coated in bake whip cream and sprinkles, swimming in soi sauce and little bits of bread, pickled eggs mashed up and laying in wait just underneath the whipped cream coating.
He had taken something a little more tame- beef stew with strawberries, lemons, blueberries, fish, wasabi, and honey. It didn't make him want to kill himself, but it was bad enough to make him go hungry.
The orange haired shinigami got into a particulary heated part of the argument and forgot to watch what he was doing, suddenly, and slammed his fist down on the table. It just so happened that his fist made contact with a spoon that had been sitting on the edge of his plate, full of the 'super yummy ham mix.'
Stark watched disinterestedly as the ham that had been on the spoon went sailing through the air, heading towards the espada too distracted by the female at his side to notice the incoming projectile.
Splat!
The room went silent for a second as everyone looked over at Grimmjow, whom had food dripping from his electric blue hair. The sexta espada slowly turned, eyes ablaze.
"Who the fuck did that?" He snarled, jumping to his feet.
Stark smirked. Things were about to get interesting.
Ichigo looked over at Rukia, like he couldn't believe that it had just happened. Like he couldn't believe she caused him to do that. Like he couldn't believe that she was suddenly acting all innocent goody-two-shoes on him.
Orihime had to bight back a smile. Had she really been in love with Ichigo at one point? He and Rukia were just so… cute!
"It was you!" Grimmjow roared, pointing frantically at Ichigo.
"It's not like I meant to!" Ichigo shouted right back, jumping out of his chair to stand.
Hitsugia quickly grabbed Momo's hand. "Let's get out of here before things get out of hand." The youth murmured.
She nodded hurriedly, and then the both silently dismissed themselves without anyone else taking any notice.
"Why don't you taste some of your own medicine?!" Grimmjow yelled, picking up a bowl of sugar-chicken pudding. He threw it over the table, the bowl sailing towards the orange-haired Soul Reaper who had started the whole mess.
Splat!
The bowl hit Ichigo right in the face, the yellow-ish liquid gooping in his hair and running down his face. Rukia started laughing at the same moment, her cackle so strong she fell out of her chair and hit the floor. Ichigo went red, pulling the bowl from his face, and glared down at Rukia.
"See how you like it!" He yelled at her, scooping up another dollop of the super yummy ham mix and flinging it down at her.
It splattered over the back of her neck and in her hair, and suddenly Rukia froze. Rukia rose up, silently, her aura growing deadly. She stood up with her hair covering her eyes, her mouth tugged down into a frown.
Ichigo was suddenly panicking, stumbling back over his chair as he waved his hands out in front of him. "R-Rukia, I-"
Without a word she grabbed his plate, lifting up in her hand, and them smashed the whole entire thing into his face.
"FOOD FIGHT!" Lillinette suddenly screeched, jumping up out of her chair and onto the table. She grabbed a plate full of iced-sugared-pickled jalapeños, flinging them in every which way.
Grimmjow clambered up onto the table then too, grabbing the nearest bowl. It was filled with something green and slimy- virtually unidentifiable. He used the spoon to launch some at Halibel, turning to fling a glob at Ulquiorra right afterwards.
Halibel rose up out of her seat in a rage, taking her whole plate and flinging it across the table at Grimmjow like it was a Frisbee. The plate his him hard in she chest, sending him flying off the table, food spraying Soi Fon as his body flew past.
Ulquiorra calmly stood just when Halibel did, picking up his knife as if it was a sword, and spearing a peppered pair on the end he proceeded to fling varois fruits to the end of the table were Grimmjow would be.
Soi Fon, meanwhile, had slipped up onto the table and with narrowed eyes was targeting Halibel with potato-strawberry jam-shrimps at the woman.
When Halibel had thrown her Frisbee of food, a couple pieces had flown off before hitting Grimmjow. One of the pieces had hit Stark's chin, the bright yellow of mustard making a bright stain on his clothing as it fell from his chin. He didn't blame Halibel, of course. No. This was all Grimmjow's fault. He, too, stood. Taking up a plate of blueberry Jell-O cubes with pieces of turkey floating inside of them, he began to chuck them at Grimmjow before he could even recover from being hit by Halibel's plate of food.
Orihime happily stood laughing next to Ulquiorra, taking the hits from the rest of the room in good humor. She dished out her own food to her opponents, always having wanted to become part of a food fight.
Somewhere along the way Nelliel had stood, and catching a bit off soggy bread in her brilliant mane of sea-green hair, she had joined the fray. Armed with boiled-bubblegum mustard spaghetti, she began to fling food at anyone and everyone.
Rukia and Ichigo had somehow gotten into a bit of a one-on-one battle and were rolling over the table, shoving various dishes at each other as they became completely coated in food.
"NO ONE THROWS SPRINKLES AT GRIMMJOW JAGGERJAUQES!"
"You are a fool for engaging in any form of combat with me!"
"HAHAHAHA! Food every where!"
"… This could have been avoided."
"No. This is war!"
"You are a worthy opponent, but it is futile."
"Trash."
"Super sparkly sushi wads! Attack!"
"You fool, I'll never get this out of my hair! Prepare to die!"
"Your hair?! Your hair?! You shoved HONEY down my PANTS!"
And so the war went on.
No one knows how long it was until that poor, poor messenger boy/ baby sitter came into the room, looking timid as ever. He had to stay strong. Miss Halibel had given him the task of making sure the ballroom was ready for that evening, and then had told him he would announce it when it was time.
He had to be brave.
"E-Excuse me." He waited. "E-Exucse me!"
Everyone froze.
Rukia was on top of Ichigo, her hands paused where they had been smearing avocado all over his face. Nel and Lillinette were still where the had been stationed behind a hastily made fort of chairs, both with their hair sticking up oddly from where they had take direct hits to the face. Ulquiorra's hand was hovering in front of Orihime's eye, were he had caught a flying biscuit, Orihime herself holding onto him while she prepared to throw a wasabi-cream puff at the attacker. Halibel and Stark where back-to-back standing beside the table, both with some sort of food held up in preparation for throwing. And Grimmjow was frozen on top of a chair stacked on the table, Soi Fon paused on his shoulder form where she had been about to launch with a particularly nasty bowel full of fish, lemon gelatin, eggs, butter, blue cheese, carrot puree, apple cider, vinegar, and sweet pickles.
"U-uh, m-miss Halible, um, t-the ballroom i-is read-dy."
And then, everyone had composed themselves, hurrying back into chairs, sitting properly, like nothing had ever happened.
Halibel, covered in food, brushed off her hakama like it would make a difference. Managing to be dignified even with such a disarray, she nodded firmly. "Excellent. We shall all be meeting there shortly after we have cleaned up. I assume that the staff shall be cleaning the dining room. When we have finished use of the ballroom I fully expect for this room to be useable again, as we will be enjoying dessert." To the rest of the people in the room, she added, "Directly after shall be a human custom Orihime has thought up for us."
A few nods were shared, and then everyone got up oh-so casually, leaving the room to clean themselves up.
The poor messenger boy wondered how long the guests would be staying, and had to also wonder just when things would go back to normal.
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Bye the way. My email has been glitching out like crazy lately. I can't even open it in firefox, and in Chrome I can read everything but I can't open up Fanfiction via email to reply to reviews. So it might be a little while before I can reply again, but I will try! Sorry again. :( I still love all of your comments, and some of the most recent ones have really made me laugh! Thank you all!