Veronica activated her omnitool.
"It was the situation, mostly. You'll see."
The scene opened inside an empty elevator. Just your everyday elevator, with the ubiquitous elevator music.
"This is irony, right? Performance art? Because there's nothing sexy going on," Myrtus quipped.
Veronica shushed him, suppressing a laugh.
The doors opened. A turian in perfectly normal work attire entered. He pushed a button. The doors shut. The elevator was on the move again.
"Are you sure this is porn?" Myrtus grumbled.
"It is! Why are you being impatient?"
"Sorry. Sorry, I'm used to maybe ten seconds of set up and then fucking happens. This is like surveillance footage."
"... And then fucking happens," Veronica repeated, snickering. "Great turn of phrase."
Another stop on another floor. Two entered, a human woman and another turian. The doors closed, and once again the elevator moved on. No one said a word or made a gesture. One more time, the doors opened and yet one more turian stepped into the elevator. The doors closed and that bland and yet obnoxious elevator music played on.
Myrtus finally noticed the one detail that indicated in any way, shape or form so far that this was actual porn. None of the turians were wearing gloves.
The elevator made a harsh beep and the passengers looked up. The elevator was stuck. The human woman made a sad, impatient sound. A VI's voice informed them that repairs to the automated system would not be completed for 1 hour and 53 minutes.
"Spirits, this is asinine," Myrtus couldn't stop himself.
"But isn't the attention to detail impressing you at all?" Veronica asked innocently. Too innocently.
"... Please don't use my perfectionism against me."
"So," one of the turians said. "What are we going to do to pass the time?"
"I can think of something," the woman replied, strangely pert.
"Why is there BAD TALKING?" Myrtus cried out, after more stilted dialog.
Veronica just laughed at that, making the omnitool projection shake uncontrollably. Myrtus' incredulous expression made the hilarity of it even worse and she had to pause the vid.
"It's a traditional human porn conceit. Setting up the situation. Establishing place and context," she managed to make a straight face. "Horribly cruddy lines."
"... You are all so weird."
"Not all porn is like this. But like I said, I saved this because it's funny."
"More like unbelievably embarrassing to witness."
Veronica kissed him, cuddled against his side once more and resumed the vid.
One of the turians closed in on the woman, brazenly putting his hands on her waist. She smiled, putting her hands over his, guiding them to her breasts instead, licking her lips. That was all the signal they needed, because the other two bracketed her on either side. One pulled her dress zipper down, the other pulled her hem up and they peeled her out of her clothes. She wriggled and gasped as they all touched her, and Myrtus knew what that was like at least, how nice simply feeling skin that smooth was. Her buttocks were fondled, her waist was traced and massaged, the strange indentation of her navel was explored, her shoulders and arms petted. She reached back, undoing her bra.
She sighed and made soft, high pitched noises of appreciation as one hand or another cupped and slid on her breasts, fingers flicking or pinching at the nipples. Her posture became lax; she was leaning against one of the turians, who was laving at her neck. She flushed and became noticeably louder when the other two knelt and began licking at her nipples, arching into them.
"Are you... sensitive like that? There?"
"Mmmhmmm," Veronica nodded. "You're going to find out how much, later. Later."
The camera floated lower. They slipped her panties down and supported her so that one leg was lifted, leaving her exposed. Their hands moved downwards, slowly, carefully, feeling out the softness and gathering moistness there. The woman started to pant, actually rolling her hips encouragingly. They built on her tension and she came, trembling and breathless.
Two of them lifted her up, cradling her into place and the third entered her, slow and easy, and the camera lingered on slick enveloping of it. She nearly crooned, as best as Myrtus could describe it, biting her bottom lip in appreciation as her current partner increased his pace. One of the ones holding her up casually reached out, rubbing the pad of a finger at her clitoris, making her arch, making her yell. Her partner peaked, crying out. She was put back down on her feet then, but not before the camera caught sight of his spill in her, dripping out of her. She turned away from the camera and bent over, presenting herself, making a come hither wiggle at one of the turians who had been holding her up. As he pulled her closer, rubbing his cock against her, she reached out to the third, bracing a hand on his jutting hip to steady herself as she took his hardness into her mouth. She made a muffled groan as her second partner slid home.
"Veronica?"
"Hmm?"
"Please don't make me sit through the whole thing," Myrtus made a desperate lick at Veronica's neck. "Can we move things along? Please?"
"Did you just honk my boob?"
"..."
"You just honked my boob. Myrtus, you're going to have to learn better technique than that. I'm a lady."
"Sorry!"
Mytrus wasn't really understanding how Veronica could be laughing instead of disappointed by his inept (especially compared to the porn) groping. He'll take hilarity over disappointment, though.
"Okay. Okay, I'm done," Veronica pressed a hand to her mouth. "Let's- Eeep!"
Myrtus had scooped her up in his arms and was very determinedly striding towards his bedroom.
tbc