A few days after Christmas, Sam sat at the booth in the Roadhouse by himself, his head resting on his unbroken arm. Every time he saw Gabe, it got harder. He didn't want to bring it up. If Gabe wanted to tell him whatever it was, he would. It also got harder not to act on his feelings, but he was used to that one.

But that wasn't the extent of Sam's problems. He hadn't been sleeping well. Every night, he'd dream he was back at Luci's, being tortured, beaten, and screamed at. Every night, it was like he'd never left. And when he woke up, disoriented and heart pounding, there was almost never a way to get back to sleep. If he did fall back asleep, he just wound up right back at Luci's. He closed his eyes and thought that maybe the Roadhouse would give him a few minutes of rest.

"Sam, I need your help," Kevin said, sliding into the booth.

Sam yawned, "Hey, Kevin. What's up?"

"I'm either going to drop out of school this semester," Kevin said quickly, "Or I'm going to break up with Anna."

Sam sat up abruptly and stared at Kevin. It had only been a few weeks since they'd started dating, but this all sounded a bit drastic.

"Okay, Kevin, what's going on?" Sam asked.

"It's Anna. I really like her, and I love spending time with her, but she's a distraction," Kevin explained, "She says I need to relax, but have you seen her? I'm not going to get any work done this semester. I might as well not go. I'm just going to fail all my classes anyway. Either that or I'm gonna have to end it with Anna."

Sam grinned at Kevin's plight. "Kevin," he said, "Have you thought about the fact that you might actually get your work done?"

Kevin stared, dumfounded, at Sam, "Of course I've thought of that."

Sam nodded, "You can balance homework and Anna."

"I don't know," Kevin said.

Sam said, "Tell you what. I'll help you if your work starts slipping, but Anna's right. You need to relax."

Kevin slouched back against the booth and gave a sigh of relief, "Thanks, Sam."

Sam put his head back on his arm and muttered, "No problem."

"Are you alright?" Kevin asked.

Sam sighed and sat back up. "Yeah," he said, "I'm fine. Just tired."

"It's winter break. It's not like you have school to stay awake for," Kevin said.

Sam grinned, "I haven't been sleeping well. But for all you know, I could be out partying all the time or something."

Kevin pointed to Sam's broken arm, "Yep. Every college kid thinks it's cool to go out partying in a cast and on pain killers."

"It's cooler than you'd think," Sam replied.

Kevin grinned. They both knew Sam's idea of partying was reading in the library or walking around the city. Actual partying was more Luci's thing. And it was obnoxious.

"Why can't you sleep?" Kevin asked.

Sam said, "Just nightmares. No big deal."

Kevin said quickly, "You know, chronic nightmares are a sign of schizophrenia."

Sam laughed. If he was actually crazy, at least there'd be medication for that.

"I don't think that's it," Sam said, "But thanks for trying."

Just then, Anna walked up to the table.

"Are you ready to go?" Anna asked Kevin. Sam tried to give her a friendly smile, but it was all he could do to not collapse on the table. All he wanted was a few hours of solid sleep. Anna glanced at Sam as Kevin slid out of the booth.

"Where are you guys going?" Sam asked.

"Skating," Anna said, "Don't worry, I'll get him back in one piece."

Sam swallowed his pain and fought a grimace. He had a feeling Gabe would be much less willing to go skating with him now that he knew how Sam felt towards him. Just one more opportunity that he stupidly threw away with that damn kiss.

"Have fun," Sam said. Kevin grinned and followed Anna out the door. Sam saw how relaxed Kevin was with Anna. He usually walked around like the weight of the world was pressing down on him, but with his hand in Anna's, Kevin seemed to be almost carefree. It was nice to see. Sam rested his head on his arm and closed his eyes. Just a few minutes. That's all he needed.

"You know, I'm not an expert, but I believe there is a contraption called a bed that can help with sleeping," Balthazar said quickly. Sam groaned and sat up, using an extraordinary amount of willpower.

"Wow, Sam," Balthazar said, "You look awful."

Sam sighed and attempted a grin, "Thanks."

"You should go home and get some rest," he pressed. Sam barely managed to fix Balthazar with a bitchface. Even his facial muscles were too tired for life.

Sam said, "That's what I've been trying to do here, actually."

The blonde man rolled his eyes, "Ah. Well, I'll leave you to it."

He walked away from the booth, and Sam went back to resting. The next person who talked to him and kept him from sleeping would get a fist in the face.

As Sam shut his eyes, a familiar voice said, "Sam?"

"Gabriel," Sam grumbled. His heart raced and his stomach churned in unease. He was never going to get any rest. Slowly, Sam sat up straight and looked at his friend.

"Are you okay?" Gabe asked, worry saturating his voice. Sam let his eyes close. It stung to keep them open for long.

"No," he said.

"Why are you here?" Gabe asked.

"I could ask you the same thing," Sam replied sleepily.

"Balth called me," Gabe said, "You should be at home. You look like a mess."

Sam sighed, "I guarantee you I feel worse. I can't sleep at home, so I came here. Hasn't been very productive."

Gabe grabbed Sam's hand, making Sam open his eyes in surprise.

"Why don't you come over to my place?" Gabe asked. That probably wouldn't help Sam's situation, but the offer was tempting.

"I don't know," Sam said.

Gabe pressed, "I can help you sleep. And you're not gonna be able to sleep much here. Come on."

Sam nodded and got up from the booth. Honestly, he was surprised his legs supported him, given how exhausted he was. Gabriel wrapped an arm around Sam's waist for support as they left the Roadhouse. His chest ached with how much he wanted the gesture to mean more.

When they got to Gabe's and Sam collapsed on the bed, Gabe asked, "Why are you so tired?"

Sam groaned as his head hit the pillow. So much of him ached from lack of sleep, laying down felt like finally healing a wound that he hadn't known he had.

"Haven't been sleeping well," Sam grumbled.

Gabe started to help Sam take his shirt off.

"Don't do that," Sam said. He couldn't take the absence of the emotion he craved with that gesture.

Gabe released his shirt, "Sorry. Force of habit. I know you don't like sleeping with your shirt on, so I-"

"It's fine," Sam said, "It's just...confusing."

Gabe nodded and let his gaze drop to the floor.

"So," Gabe said, "What's been keeping you from sleeping?"

"Nightmares," Sam answered.

"About what?"

"I really don't want to talk about it."

Gabe looked at Sam, worried. "It could help," he said.

Sam sighed and shrugged off his shirt with only a moderate amount of difficulty.

"I have dreams about Luci," Sam answered quietly.

Gabe reached for Sam's hand, which, against Sam's better judgment, he did not withdraw.

"I'm sorry, Sam," Gabe said.

Sam shrugged like it wasn't a big deal.

After a moment, Gabe asked, "Have you considered seeing someone? A therapist might be able to-"

Sam shook his head, "There's no point. It'd just be wasting money to try and fix something that's too broken to be repaired."

Gabe didn't say anything else on the matter.

"Do you want me to sleep on the futon?" his friend asked.

Sam briefly opened his eyes to look at Gabe. "You can sleep here if you want. I don't mind," he said.

At least that way, if he woke up from dreaming of rape and pain, he would have Gabriel there. Gabe pulled his shirt off and crawled into bed next to Sam. Slowly, Sam scooted closer to his friend and rested his tired head on Gabe's chest. He waited for Gabe to protest the motion, but he never did.

Gabe kissed Sam's hair, sending heat shooting through Sam's veins.

"I know you think you're too broken to be fixed," Gabe murmured in the dark, "But it'd be great if you'd let me try."

Sam stiffened. "Gabe-" he started.

"I already know most of your story. It wouldn't cost money like going to a therapist would. And I could help you. Even if I can't help fix it completely, at least it could be better, easier to deal with. You just have to let me in a little," Gabriel reasoned.

Sam was so tired, so worn thin, that he didn't have the energy to argue.

"Okay," Sam said, "But not now. I need to sleep."

Gabe said quietly, "Thank you. We'll talk in the morning."

Regardless of the worry burrowing in his stomach and the anxiety of letting Gabe into the madness in his head, Sam fell asleep on his friend's chest effortlessly.