So, I have decided that I will allow people to request songs (and story-lines) but I can't always guarantee immediate inspiration as to how to write it, so I can't post it immediately, but I will keep it in mind.
a beautiful lie - 30 seconds to mars
Lying in bed, next to Stiles, half asleep, half awake, Jackson knows that this can only last for a short while. He knows that he's the kanima – he's seen the way that everyone looks at him now. They're scared, bloody terrified, of him. What if he changes in the middle of school? Matt may be dead, but they have no control over who Gerard decides to kill. And Jackson wishes sometimes that they would stop looking at him like that; he knows that as the kanima he has no self-control, but he's human enough to fight the desire to harm anyone other than his master orders.
But he doesn't know how he and Stiles ended up like this, in the same bed. Especially when they're supposed to hate each other. He could analyse what they have and come up with a million ways in which it could go wrong (and he's done this once or twice before) but now? Now he can't be bothered. He can take it for what it is. But what is it? (shut up, shut up, he thinks) But it's too late now. His mind's asked the question and he needs an answer.
"Stiles," he whispers. "Stiles, wake up."
"What is it?" Stiles voice is bleary and Jackson's heart lurches.
"What is this?" Jackson asks, gesturing between them.
"You woke me up to ask that?" Stiles sighs. "I don't know what this is. Whatever you want it to be, I guess."
"What if I said I loved you?"
"I'd say you're mad, but I guess that's a given with you."
"I'm not mad. I love you." Stiles looks uncertain.
"You're not lying, are you?" he asked, hesitantly.
"No, no, never." Jackson replied, vehemently. "I love you." Stiles smiles, softly.
"I love you, too. Now, can I go back to sleep." Jackson grins at this and nods.
At five in the morning, Jackson is still awake. Stiles is asleep, and when Jackson looks down at him, he gets this weird sensation in his stomach, lurching butterflies. "Stiles?" he whispers. "Stiles."
"Now what?"
"What if it all goes wrong?"
"What if what goes all wrong?"
"What if I stay controlled by Gerard forever? What if I'm stuck as the kanima forever?" He's panicking, he knows he is, but he can't stop.
"You won't, Jacks," Stiles says, fully awake now. "I won't let it happen like that. I promise that it won't be like this forever." Jackson is still panicked, so Stiles pulls him into a slightly awkward one-armed hug. "I won't let it happen," he repeats. And Jackson wants to believe him. He knows that Stiles has almost no say in what happens in life and what doesn't but he wants to believe him so badly that it hurts. So he does. He lets go of his panic and allows himself to believe Stiles' words (even though he knows it'll probably turn out badly – most things like this do for him). Stiles kisses him on the forehead. "Sleep now, okay," he says. "I'm fucking exhausted so sleep." Jackson breathes out a laugh. And now he finds, when he closes his eyes, he can fall asleep easily.