"Aw dammit..."

"Luffy's trapped down there..." I sighed.

"We better go do something about it." He tossed his bottle behind him. I hopped off the roof, he followed.

Zoro and I tried to rouse the sleeping captain. "I think he's worse than you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Zoro glared daggers at me, then there was a very impressive explosion, We shared a glance, grabbed Luffy and booked it for safety.

I felt a little (a lot) insensitive for just leaving Vivi back there, but it was only for a little while, we returned in time to see Mr. 9 valiantly try to fight for Vivi's safety, and get blown up by a piece of snot from Mr. 5.

"Wait, hold on a second," The swordsman was staring at Mr. 5 in horror, "Did that come from his nose?"

"I think it did..." I answered softly. We didn't notice Igaram crawl over to us. He grabbed Zoro's ankle.

"Whoa! Hey, hey! What are you doin'?" Zoro shouted, trying to pull his leg away.

"Swordsman!" He shouted desperately, "I have a most unreasonable request, but I need someone with strength such as yours!"

Zoro kept trying to pull his leg away, "Yeah right, you gotta be kidding me. Would you let go a' me?"

I crossed my arms, listening to Igaram, "Both of those villains possess Devil Fruit powers, and there's nothing I can do to stop them." Something tugged in my heart, "And that's why I'm begging you now. Please protect princess Vivi of Alabasta in my place!"

"Ugh! Let go of me!"

"Please!" He begged. I grabbed Ami's and Ana's hilts, I knew what I wanted to do. But I also knew the wine would set in at any moment. "Surely you will be rewarded if you can deliver the princess safely to our noble home of Alabasta Kingdom!" He coughed, looking more distressed, "I am just a humble servant, but I'm begging you to do this, please protect the Princess! I beg you!" He coughed more, Igaram was obviously in great pain, and yet here he was, begging for Zoro's help.

Zoro didn't quite see what I was seeing though, "Forget it! Just until a few minutes ago you were still trying to kill me! What do you think I am, a fool?!"

"Zoro," My grip tightened, "I think we should do it."

"Wha-" He was cut off by someone else.

"So... about this reward..." I looked up and saw Nami sitting there, So not surprising, I knew Nami would have been too smart to fall for their cheep tricks. She smiled, pointing to Igaram "I'll take it! Alright, how does a billion berries sound?"

Zoro seemed shocked, "Nami?"

"Huh!?" Igaram obviously wasn't on board with such a hefty reward, "What did you say?!" He coughed, "Ma, ma, maa?"

"I thought you were asleep." Zoro said, turning to the navigator.

"Come on, you didn't really think Nami would fall for that?"

The navigator smiled, "Really, Zoro," She mimicked her act last night, "Oh I can't drink anymore but I have to win the contest!"

"Arg, what ever." Zoro rubbed his head.

I glanced down at Igaram, "Ma. Ma, Maa!" He seemed shocked by Nami.

Nami looked at him as well, "So why don't you go a head and promise us that 1 billion berry reward, huh Captain? Because if we don't agree to help your princess, then she's probably.." Nami smiled wickedly, "Gonna die."

I was shocked by how forward Nami was with that statement. Igaram looked away, "I am just a simple soldier, I cannot promise such an immense reward."

Nami got down in front of him, "Surely you aren't suggesting that your princess's life is worth less than that, right?"

Zoro crossed his arms, "Doesn't really fight fair, does she?"

I shook my head, "Nope."

Igaram pushed himself up, "I can't promise anything, but if you're willing to deliver the princess to Alabasta then you had best discuss the terms of the reward directly with her."

Nami smiled again, "heh, Which means I have to save her first, yeah?"

"Please understand..." The royal guard pleaded, "Her life is in danger."

Nami stood up, admitting partial defeat, "Oh alright," She ran a hand through her hair, "I'll go a head and save your darling princess, for now." Nami turned to me and Zoro, pointing off in the direction Vivi had run off, "Well you two, go get her!"

"What?!" I shouted, not that I was opposed to saving Vivi, but just the way Nami demanded it of us.

"Screw that! No!" Zoro yelled, "If you wanna make money then that's fine, but leave me out of it!"

Nami easily stood up to Zoro, "Oh come on, don't be stupid and stubborn, the money I make is certainly mine, but the contracts I land benefit all of us, why can you not see that?"

I crossed my arms, glancing over in the direction of the princess as Zoro and Nami went at it. "You seriously expect me to buy into that crap!?"

"What? All you really need to do here is cut up a few guys."

"Oh really is that all?!" I sighed, These two might be at it all night... "Don't boss me around like you do that idiot cook!"

I shifted, biting my lip. This is ridiculous...

"Oh I see, you're just afraid you're gonna end up losing to them." Ouch.

"You wanna try saying that again, you greedy brat!" Zoro was shaking with anger.

"You're a big baby who's afraid of losing to bigger losers than you are!"

"You better shut your mouth right now!"

"Guys..."

"NOT NOW, LEANAH!" They shouted at me, I pursed my lips, I was just going to mention how our captain just got up and walked away.. but...

Nami looked back at Zoro, hands on her hips, "Besides, did you forget? You still owe me some money from a while back."

Zoro was back to having his arms crossed over his chest, "What? I don't owe you anything."

"Yeah, I lent you 100 thousand berries for some swords in Lougetown."

This was getting boring, If they don't stop squabbling soon... Vivi isn't going to last much longer...

"I gave you the 100 thousand back almost right away, someone gave me the swords, so I didn't even need your stupid berries."

"Maybe so, but you agreed to pay me 300% interest, bringing your total to 300 thousand berries." Zoro's eye twitched, he was obviously having a flash back of some kind. "And you agreed to it, you still owe interest."

"I gave you the 100 thousand back the same day, you can't really expect me to pay you interest."

I fantasized about being with Shanks and his crew. Hm, we would be sailing... a light breeze, there'd be music... and drinks... and I wouldn't have to sit here, and wait for these two to stop arguing...

"Sure can." Nami looked up at him with a dark expression, "Come on," She said coldly, "Can't you even keep one little promise?" Zoro reacted like he'd been stabbed in the gut. Nami smiled, having finally found the trump card for Zoro, "Now just do what I say, and I'll consider calling us even."

Zoro glared at her, "Someday you're gonna die a horrible death!" I almost agreed with him.

"Oh yes, and I'm sure I'll go straight to hell." She turned on me, "Now, what do I have to do to get you to save her."

"Nothing." I said curtly, "Saving Vivi is the right thing to do, regardless of reward or not. I would've already been running to save her but..." A guilty smile came across my face, "I may have over done it with the wine... just a little bit." I certainly felt tipsy.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Zoro shouted, he turned and ran, grabbing my collar as he passed, "Damn women!"

"Love you, too." I deadpanned as he dragged me down the dusty roads.

"THANKS, ZORO!"

"SHUT UP!" He shouted back at Nami. He dragged me a little ways farther.

"Ya know, I can walk." I said, "All yer really doin right now is getting my clothes all dusty and wasting your energy."

"What?" He stopped, dropping me. I stood up and brushed myself off.

"I can walk just damn fine. When I'm tipsy like this, it's my sword skills that fly out the window." I sighed, then began running, "Enough about me. We have to go save the Princess!"

We ran through the maze of streets, hunting the slightest hint of Vivi or Mr. 5.

"Where is this princess?!" He shouted from behind me.

I slowed down, That's a good question... There was a large explosion to our left, "I think she's that way." We ran toward the explosion, switching to roof hopping as we got closer.

When we arrived we found ourselves staring down at an empty street, "Dammit!" Zoro cursed, there was another explosion not to far away.

I pointed, "There! Let's go! We don't have much time!" We jumped from roof to roof, taking the path of least resistance. We arrived just in time.

Zoro managed to get in the way of Mr. 5's attack to cut the... snot bomb in half. I jumped down as well, landing nicely on my feet next to my crew mate.

"Augg! I just cut someone's snot!" He whined.

"Yeah, but I bet it won't be the worst thing you ever do on the Grand Line." I said, slowly drawing my swords, I have to at least try to fight. I thought to myself.

"Dammit!" Vivi shouted, "I don't have time for this! Don't you ever give up?!"

I knocked her weapon away, "Relax Princess Vivi, we're here to help you, not harm you."

She seemed shocked, "...What? You're helping me?" I nodded, keeping my eyes locked on Mr. 5 and his partner.

"I take it you two are the ones who beat up all the lowly employees who were stationed out here." Mr. 5's partner said.

"Why would you two want to protect the princess of Alabasta?"

"We've got our own reasons." Zoro answered.

"Well, what ever your reasons we're gonna have to eliminate you." Mr. 5 explained, "You see, you're in our way."

His partner let out an irritating laugh that made me want to run her through. "Aw, what a shame." She said in a mock sad tone.

Mr. 5 stuck a finger up his nose, I was mildly disgusted but held my ground. Zoro popped on of his swords out of its sheath.

The moment was tense. Broken only by an angry shout. "I FOUND YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU!" I registered the voice to be Luffy's and looked in the direction the shout came from, and saw Luffy coming at us. He was still boated from all the food he had eaten earlier tonight, it looked quite hilarious, and would have been had he not been giving a death glare. Something tells me he's not here to help us fight Mr. 5... "ZOOOOOROOOO!" Yep... not here to help us fight Mr. 5. The tone of his voice implied anger at Zoro.

"Luffy! Thanks for coming, but we got this one," I faltered as Zoro said that, Is he really that stupid?! "Unless that greedy brat dragged you into this too." Anyone could see Luffy wasn't here to help us.

Our captain huffed, glaring at the swordsman. "YOU ARE GONNA PAY FOR WHAT YOU DID! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID!"

Called it... I said in my head.

"WHAT?!" Zoro shouted back. "What kind 'a nonsense have you gotten into your head this time!?"

Luffy stepped forward, "Shut up and get ready! I'm about to kick your ungrateful little ass!"

"Ungrateful...?"

"Oh no..." I moaned, "Don't tell me this is about-"

"That's right! This is about what you did to those people! All of them were so nice to us, they welcomed us and threw us a party. And they gave us Food!" Luffy shouted, "And you repay them by cutting them all up with those swords of yours!"

Zoro was getting annoyed. "Yeah, but there's something you don't know!"

"Luffy, you gotta lis-" I tried to get in.

"JUST SHUT UP!" Luffy screamed, "And fight me!"

"This guy's just a complete idiot.." Vivi said in awe.

I sighed, "I can really see why you thought Zoro was the captain..."

"Ha," Mr. 5 laughed, "These idiots are fighting amongst themselves. How pathetic."

Mr. 5's partner laughed, "If we wait long enough maybe they'll kill each other and we won't have to bother with them."

Zoro sighed angrily, "Hold on, Luffy, can you just listen to me for a second."

"Seriously, Luffy. You don't have the whole story." I said pleadingly. "This town was popu-"

"No excuuusssseeeesssss!" Luffy bounced into the air, heading straight for us.

"OH GOD!" I rolled out of the way, as Zoro stayed put.

"Wait! NO!" He dodged a punch from Luffy at the last second, Luffy's fist connected with the rock behind him, crushing it to pieces. "You tryin' to kill me!?" Zoro shouted.

"Uhuh! Now die!"

Zoro gave the captain a blank look, then quickly dodged Luffy's kick, "Dammit!"

I got up, watching Luffy recklessly smash into different parts of the rock trying to kill Zoro. "Aw crap... This isn't good..." My brow furrowed.

"Why?" Vivi asked.

I rubbed my forehead with the back of my hand, "Luffy and Zoro are by far the strongest physical fighters on our ship. Plus they both use fighting styles that openly oppose each other." I explained, "Zoro is more used to fighting with and against slashing or sword techniques, while Luffy uses only blunt attacks. Luffy with his Devil Fruit ability is immune to blunt attacks, but vulnerable to slashing attacks..." I bit my lip, "There's a good chance they could actually kill each other if the fight gets serious."

Zoro jumped out of the way of another of Luffy's attacks, "He's gone crazy!" He said more to himself, "Luffy you've got to stop this!" The captain then tackled the swordsman and they went flying into a building.

"Dammit!" I swore, "How are we supposed to keep one person safe IF YOU TWO KEEP FIGHTING?!" I screamed, then turned to Mr. 5 and his partner, getting into a fighting stance.

"Well look at that, Mr. 5." She said moving to close her umbrella, "It looks like they're too busy fighting each other, they won't give us any trouble."

"Apparently, so why don't we leave those two idiots to their fight while we get rid of the third one and do the mission we were sent here to do. Eliminating Princess Vivi of Alabasta Kingdom." I focused, trying not to be distracted by Luffy and Zoro who constantly crossed through the middle of the battle field in their fight. "Shall we, Ms. Valentine?"

"Yes, Mr. 5!" They ran at us.

I brought my blades together, "Storming blast!" I shouted while making several cuts in the air, a separate green energy wave coming from each cut, creating a small storm of dust and energy heading straight for them.

They both dodged with ease, unfazed by my attack. Crap! That was a new technique, and it didn't work!

"QUIT SCREWING AROUND, DAMMIT!" Zoro shouted, kicking Luffy... straight into Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine. And that sent the two agents flying back into a building. I twitched. Zoro huffed, "Ya dumbass!"

I watched the building they had crashed into carefully. "This is either going to be really good for us, or really bad for us..." I muttered. A series of explosions marked a battle inside, Ms. Valentine floated out of the building, opening her umbrella.

"Now I'm really annoyed!" She shouted, "I hope you're ready to experience my Kilo-Kilo Fruit power!" She laughed, "Prepare to be smashed into a thousand tiny pieces and buried a hundred meters in the ground!" the woman floated to just above us.

"Mr. Bushido! Leanah! You have to get out of the way!" Vivi shouted, "She's going to-"

"Hush!" I told her.

"We have more important things to worry about right now." He said, his eyes firmly fixed on the building Luffy was in.

Captain emerged from the smoke, holding a badly beaten up Mr. 5 by the collar. He pat his stomach, back to his usual lean body. "That was a good work out. I finally managed to digest some of that food."

Vivi was naturally shocked, "He... He fought Mr. 5.. and won?! He took out one of Baroque Works best agents!"

"I told you, Luffy is one of the strongest physical fighters on our ship." I sheathed my swords, any more fighting would be completed by either Luffy or Zoro, my main goal now was to keep the princess out of the middle of it.

"Alright." Luffy said looking directly at Zoro, "Now let's finish this!"

"OK, Luffy, let's just calm down and talk about this.." Zoro said, trying to reason with him.

"Here I come," Ms. Valentine called, she continued to rant, but Zoro spoke over her.

"Hear me out for a second, everyone who lives here at Whiskey Peak is really a bounty hunter, so that makes the all our enemies."

"HEY!" She shouted again, "Pay attention to me you jackasses!"

Luffy dropped the Baroque Works agent, "You're just lying! Enemies wouldn't give us tasty food, would they?!"

Ms. Valentine had had enough of being ignored, "Taste my 10 thousand kilogram press!" She began falling at an incredible speed that would have mortally wounded anyone.

She was foiled when Zoro shifted to the left just enough to get out of her course of impact. "Fine then." He pulled his bandana off of his arm, "It doesn't look like there's any sense in trying to talk to you." He tied it around his head, "You know, you're really a moron."

"Crap... He's getting serious..." I took several steps back, until I was next to Vivi.

Zoro reached for his swords, "This time I'm not gonna hold back. It'll be your own fault if you die!"

"Sounds good to me!" Luffy shouted.

"Just a sec!" Vivi said, confused, "What's going on here? I thought you guys were on the same side?"

"They are." I answered, trying to think of a way to explain why this was OK. "... Our crew has a very odd silent understanding. If something happens... say we go too far against Luffy's wishes or he gets in the way of us reaching our goals we can defect and fight." I waved a hand at Zoro and Luffy, "Luffy thinks Zoro has killed innocent people, that's a major no-no with our crew. Meanwhile Zoro here has two promises he wishes to fulfill, one of which is to never lose a fight. This is something I cannot stop at this point, it's best to just avoid them until they finish and regroup later." Vivi stared at me in horror this was something huge and I was taking it so lightly.

"Ready for my Gum-gum!" Luffy stretched his arms back as he ran forward.

Zoro had his three swords out and was running at Luffy, he brought his swords back, "Oni..."

They clashed.

"BAZOOKA!"

"GIRI!"

Just the sheer force of the attack sent a shock wave through the air.

I bit my lip, "Princess," I addressed Vivi pointing in the direction Nami was waiting, "We need to get out of here."

"No." She replied, "Wait..."

I looked away as Zoro and Luffy clashed again, sending each other flying into two separate buildings. "Princess we should really be going."

She nodded, "Right, but..." She looked down the destroyed street. "I don't know how safe we would be going through there..."

"It's the fastest way to where our navigator is waiting for us." I said. "Let's go cautiously, I doubt Luffy and Zoro have killed each other yet. And if they haven't..." I grabbed Ana, "I'll make sure you don't get hurt."

"OK." She seemed worried that she might endanger my position in the crew if I attacked either Luffy or Zoro, but that didn't matter to me. We slowly walked down the street, her duck making small worried noises.

Be barely moved half way down the street before the captain and the swordsman emerged from their respective buildings with large crashes, scaring the hell out of Vivi, her duck, and me.

They ran at each other, clashing again. Luffy moved to punch Zoro, but he dodged, so Luffy tried again with a kick in the opposite direction. The swordsman ducked and slashed at Luffy, making a small cut on the captain's face. Luffy returned the cut with a punch to the gut.

I grit my teeth, "Stop fighting!" I whispered angrily. They kept slamming each other around, and occasionally debris they had created would fly towards Me and Vivi, which I would deflect with my sword. "Regaling Storm!" I shouted, whirling my blades to create a small windstorm to push the stuff off course.

The fighting kept going back and forth, Zoro would get the upper hand, keeping for awhile, then Luffy would take it back with impressive force. Eventually Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine got back to their feet and tried interrupting the duel.

The response to this was the same from both swordsman and captain. "Shut up, and go away!" They glared at the officer agents, bringing a fist back to punch them "You're interfering..." They punched the officer agents, sending them flying, "WITH OUR FIGHT!"

I scratched the side of my face. "Seriously... this is going to get way out of hand soon."

Vivi stared at the unconscious bodies of Mr. 5 and Ms. Valentine. "They... took out two officer agents... unbelievable!"

Zoro turned to Luffy, "Shall we... continue with our fight?" He asked dangerously.

Luffy smiled almost manically back at him. "Yeah!"

The stood there for a moment, letting the tension rise so high you could almost see the surroundings distort because of it. They each had their own energy flowing about them.

My fingernails bit into my palm, "Seriously! Stop fighting!" They didn't hear me, too caught up in their fight. "Stop fighting, dammit!" I shouted. The tension between them had gotten so high the air sparked.

They both initiated attacks... that never finished.

A figure appeared behind them, an angry figure, She punched them both, "STOP!" Both Luffy and Zoro fell down from the force of her punch. She put her hands on her hips, glaring down at them, "You two! What the heck do you think you're doing?!"

Battle: Monkey D. Luffy vs. Roronoa Zoro

Winner: Nami

Author's Note:

And the lesson here, kids, is this: Never upset Nami. I'm quite please with how this chapter came out, and I'm sure you'll all be glad to hear that I actually have a lot of the story planned out and I know where I'm going to end this one. I do plan to have a sequel, but it will all depend on how I'm feeling about continuing on when I get to that point. Also I'm fairly sure what I have planned in Alabasta will break your hearts. I know it hurt me just writing it out.

I wonder... I would like to poll you all, what do you think SE stands for? I, of course, know exactly what it stands for, but I just want to see what y'all think it might mean. (Yes I realize I've asked this before, and I'll probably keep asking until the reveal. So get used to it.)

Your ever willing Author,
Kari910