A/N: WHO LIKES ROBOTS HERE? 8D

I don't.

But I do.

AT THE SAME TIME! AHAHAHAHAHA!

(Chapter suggested by Sir Reginald Pantaloons 3rd.)

~:~ Chapter Twenty – Link is a Musical Genius (OoT-verse) ~:~

Link was walking one day. He saw the Ocarina of Time in the moat outside Castle Town.

"Oh, it's the Ocarina of Time," he commented as he reached to pick it up. "Cool."

"HEY!" Navi screamed. "With that Chaos Emerald, you can unlock unlimited power!"

"Shut up, Navi," scolded Link. "I'm trying to connect with my past selves in order to become a musical prodigy and play any song on this thing with ease." He closed his eyes and tried to imagine giant red birds.

"HEY!" yelled Navi again. "Look! You're all grown up now!"

Young Link became Adult Link.

"Navi, quit messing with my growth cycle! Do you know how painful it is to go through puberty in under 3 seconds?"

"To open a door, stand in front of it and press A!"

Link kicked Navi and sent her flying to Termina.

"Now I can concentrate on learning some mystical ocarina songs," said Link. "Something's telling me that I need to find a guy in tights with Sheikah skills." He looked around. "Oh, wait, I'm a guy in tights with awesome Sheikah skills. Heheh."

He did a karate chop at the air, but he missed, and the air took its chance to strike at him during his moment of weakness. Link fell to the floor, defeated. The air laughed maniacally and stole his hat as a reward.

"Nooo! My hat!" gasped Link. He reached out for it, but the air was gone. Steadily, he pulled himself up and looked at the Ocarina of Time. "No matter! I shall play the Song of Time on the Ocarina of Time to send myself back in time to the time when the air challenged me and my awesome Sheikah skills!"

[Link plays the Song of Time]

The wind started blowing, twisting the leaves from the ground up into a vicious spiral leading to the sky. He could feel the magic of the notes altering reality.

"YES!" Link yelled as he overreacted to his wonderful song. "YESSSS!"

Then, everything stopped. In front of Link was a pile of thyme.

"Wh… What are you?" Link snapped.

"I AM THYME," said the pile of thyme.

"You are not time," Link responded. "Time is time. Therefore, peanut butter."

"I AM THYME, THE SUPERIOR SPICE," said the pile of thyme again. "I SHALL EAT YOU."

"The Song of Time wasn't supposed to give me thyme!" gasped Link. "What—!"

"OMNOMNOMNOM," the pile of thyme gurgled as it swallowed Link whole. "MMM, HYLIAN. YUMMY."

A few days later, after the pile of thyme successfully digested Link and got rid of him, he decided to play the Ocarina of Time again.

"I'll show that stupid pile of thyme who's boss," muttered Link. "The Bolero of Fire should do the trick!"

[Link plays the Bolero of Fire]

Bags of Hot Cheetos started falling from the sky.

"Wh-What?" gasped Link as he was attacked by the chip bags. He grabbed one and read it. "Flamin' Hot… WHAT. NO. THIS IS NOT WHAT I ASKED FOR."

Link was anger. So he threw the bag of Hot Cheetos on the floor because he was so anger. He could not control how anger he was, but he didn't want to go on like this, so he decided to play the Song of Healing in order to heal his broken spirit.

[Link plays the Song of Healing]

Link turned into a pile of Hot Pockets.

"RGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Another few days later, Link managed to learn how to deal with his new life as a pile of Hot Pockets. He successfully figured out how to get from place to place by squirting out his yummy inner filling at an extremely fast rate so that he could soar though the air as if he had a jetpack.

"Maybe the Deku Tree can help me," Link said. Even though he was a Hot Pocket, he managed to play the Minuet of Forest.

[Link plays the Minuet of Forest]

A tree made of beef stew, lollipops, and Queen Gohma appeared. Link became terribly hungry and ate it.

"WHAT HAVE I DONE?" gasped Link. Then, he saw the Great Deku Tree ice-skating. Link licked him, which caused Kokiri Forest to become engulfed in flames.

"OH MAH GODDESSES!" screamed Link. "Mah treehouse is on fire!"

Thinking quickly, he played the Serenade of Water.

[Link plays the Serenade of Water]

Link was attacked by feral cabbages.

"THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE!" Link wailed as he was continuously getting bit by those cabbages. (They loved Hot Pockets.) Eventually, Link had no choice but to eat a cabbage and become a veggie Hot Pocket in order to make the feral cabbages stop attacking him.

Three days later, he found Nabooru.

"HEY LANK," she wailed happily. "WHATCHA DOIN'?"

"Need tacos," mumbled Link, no longer a Hot Pocket.

"THAN PLAY THIS HERE SANG," she suggested. "CALLED THE REKWEEM AH SPIT."

"Requiem of Spirit?"

"REKWEEN AH SPIT."

"…Okay then," he agreed.

[Link plays the Requiem of Spirit]

All of a sudden, Link felt dizzy. His world went black, and he lost sight of Nabooru. When he woke up again, he was on a tiny island that was as big as a cow half the size of Link.

"Where am I?" he wondered. He looked all around him—there was nothing but water.

"You are in the greatest world in the world!" exclaimed a random man who wasn't wearing any clothes except for clothes.

"Who are you?" Link asked.

"I am Nabooru!" said Nabooru.

"B-but… What? Weren't you just— Aren't you supposed to be a woman?"

"I am Nabooru!" said Nabooru.

"But—"

"I am Nabooru!" said Nabooru.

"Oh, okay, fine…"

"Great!" the man named Nabooru exclaimed joyfully. "Would you like a tour of this world?"

"Sure, I guess…"

Nabooru grabbed Link and jumped into the water, where they started sinking at the rate of 100 lightbulbs per minute.

"Hey! I can breathe underwater without my Zora Tunic!" commented Link.

"YOU DON'T SAY?"

When they reached the bottom of the ocean, Link looked around curiously. There were stone buildings everywhere… and they all looked strangely familiar.

"To your left, you'll see the Water Temple," said Nabooru smugly.

"NO! Get me away from that place!" yelped Link.

"That's okay, you can go visit the Water Temple to your right," suggested Nabooru.

"Wait… What?"

"There's also a Water Temple in front of you. The one that looks like a stone building!"

"But they're all stone buildings!"

"EXACTLY!"

Nabooru made a trollface.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Link wailed, dropping to his knees. "I've been sent to a world… full of Water Temples!"

"Hmm, it's pretty dark down here, since we're thousands of feet underwater and all," muttered Nabooru. "Hey, Link! Play the Prelude of Light!"

"I'll do it if you promise me it'll get me out of here!"

"Sure, why not?"

Link pulled out his ocarina.

[Link plays the Prelude of Light]

"Top of the day, mate!" he suddenly exclaimed happily.

"Link! You're a donkey!" said Nabooru.

"Would you fancy a cup of tea with me?" offered Link, much to his own surprise.

"OF COURSE I DO! I LOVE YO—"

Link pulled out the ocarina again and played the Nocturne of Shadow before he would force himself to say something he shouldn't to Nabooru.

[Link plays the Nocturne of Shadow]

Link was teleported back to Hyrule. He looked around. The wind was blowing, the grass was green, and the sky was blue.

"Everything's normal again…" Link sighed in relief. He lay down on the grass, savoring his moments of normalness.

All of a sudden, a girl with very long black-and-brown hair came up to him.

"Link," she said, "I want to kill you."

Link stood up and drew his sword that he had forgotten.

"I am not an elf!"

She drop kicked him in the face, and Link joined the 19 or more other Links who had met terrible fates throughout the course of this story.

Then, the girl turned around and shot Sir Reginald Pantaloons 3rd in the knee with an arrow. She flew off into the sunset with a guy wearing white spandex with very fluffy hair.

~x~X~x~

A/N: NOW WASN'T THAT JUST A GREAT CHAPTER?

IT WAS GOOD WASN'T IT

WASN'T IT

-Eternal Nocturne-

Chapter Twenty – Completed July 13, 2012

(Happy Friday the 13th, everyone. :3)