Note: some of the chapters of this story are rated m. Such as this one!
Jacks pov
Jerry and I are currently watching football. Kim walks into the living room holding Sam. "jack, would you mind changing Sam? IM just putting away the groceries" she told me. "no problem, honey" I told her, taking Sam from her. "are the diapers upstairs or in the diaper bag?" I asked Kim. "uh, upstairs under the changing table" Kim told me, as she started walking into the kitchen. "should I use that cream or is that jaut at night?" I asked her. "yes, use the cream" she said, starting to run into the kitchen again. "the white cream or the jelly stuff?" I asked her. "you know what, just give him to me" Kim told me, taking Sam form me. "you sure? 'cause I'll do it" I told her. "it's ok. I got it" Kim told me, walking up the stairs with Sam in her arms. I watched as she went upstairs with Sam in her arms. "you were right!" I cheered to Jerry, once she was out of ear shot. I then sat back down on the couch next to Jerry and at a piece of popcorn that was in the bowl next to me. "let me tell you. Works everything time" Jerry told me, smirking evily. Just then tiana walked into the room with Logan in her arms and Dominic following closely behind her. "jerry, I'm trying to feed Dominic in here. Would you mind taking Logan for a walk?" she explains to Jerry, handing Logan to him. "oh, I would love to!" he replied, happily. He then tapped my shoulder with his hand, which meant watch this. "hey, honey, is the stroller in the car or in the garage?" she asked hi, as she walked into the kitchen. "it's going to be wrapped around your neck if you start with that question crap again" tiana threatened Jerry, as she walked into the kitchen. He nodded. "of course it doesn't work as well with the 2nd kid" he said, pointing to Logan. I smiled and nodded, while I chewed on my popcorn.
Kim's pov
"they're really cute at this age, aren't they?" I said, smiling as tiana and I were sitting o bench at the park, watching Dominic, logs and Sam play. "yeah, except for mines pouring sand down his pants" tiana observes. We both watch as comic pours sand down his pants and the boy next to him pants too. "or that other kids pants" tiana adds. "Dominic, leave him alone" tiana scolds Dominic. "that's ok. He's mine" the woman next to us, says to tiana and I. "I don't mind the sand. It kind of works like cat littler" she explains to us, which makes me laugh.
"heyyy!" jack says walking over to us with Jerry, who he was jaut playing basket ball with. "hey, baby!" Jerry, who is holding a basket ball, says to Tiana. jerry kisses tiana and jack kisses me. "how'd you guys do?" I asked the guys. "we lost, but those guys must play ball in school. They were amazing!" jack explains. "yeah and rough! You know, im a big guy, but i brusie like a banana!" Jerry adds. "they did play a little dirty" jack adds as well, taking a sip of his water. 2 Amish boys walk by us. "nice game, guys" one of the boys says, patting jacks shoulder. I roll my eyes. "they're not even wearing sneakers!" tiana says, laughing. I laugh a bit as well. A woman walks by, walking her kid on a leash. "hey, cool! Is that kid on a leash?!" jack asks, excitedly. "that is terrible!" I comment, scrunching my nose is disgust. "hey, yeah that's what I meant" jack corrected himself. Jerry looked at him and smiled. "a kid on a leash. Never ceases to amaze me of the stuff I see some of these parents doing!" the woman next to us comments. "mommy, I'm hungry" her son tells her, running over up her. " oh, would he like a cookie?" I ask the woman. "oh no thanks I got it" she replies. She then begins to breast feed her son! Jack, jerry tiana and i all stare at her, shocked!
"well, there's another park we can't go back to" tiana spoke, as all of us, including the kids walked into the house after we came home from the park. X"I hope she didn't think we were rude" I said, worriedly as tiana and I put sam and Logan into their playpen. "well, we did kind of run to the car" tiana replied. "call me old fashioned, but I think a child is too old to breast feed when he can unhook mommys bra with hand" jack spoke as i walked over to him and Jerry. Tiana laughed a bit. "relax, maybe we didn't see what we thought we saw. Maybe the kid was just a freakishly gigantic 1 year old" jerrympoitned out. "Jerry, when he was done he asked his mother to lay off the Mexican food!" I exclaimed, as I unloaded the backpack that we brough to the park with us. "I mean, the problem with breast feeding that long is, how do you stop? I mean at that point, you gotta do the whole don't worry, we'll still be friends" tiana rants on. "well, yeah that's what most of the books said, right Kim?" jack asked me. "yeah, most of them said a year. Some said a little more, some said a little less, but a year was more than enough for me! I couldn't wait to stop! That's womans a freak!" I ranted, walking into the kitchen.
Jacks pov
"come on, guys! Breast feeding is beautiful! It's nature. It's not like she's committing some crime!" Jerry defends the woman. "you just want to get a free peek at her boobs!" tiana confessed, as she walked into the kitchen. "it's a woman breast feeding. Believe me, there's nothing sexual about that" Jerry shouts to tiana. "did you see them?" he asked me, once tiana was out of the room. "no. The kids head was in the way" I say, as I search through the mail.
I'm lying in bed right now, but something's missing! Kim! I get up out of bed to go and find her. I walk across the hall to Sams room and listen closely. I open the door and sure enough she's in there and she's breast feeding Sam! "don't come in here!" she exclaims. "are you breast feeding?" I ask her, from the doorway. "get out!" she exclaims. "get out!" she snaps. I Clare the door to SAMs room, shocked at what I just saw.
I'm sitting in our bed when Kim walks into our room. She sighs and takes off her pink robe. I look at her weird. She walks over to her side of the bed and climbs in. I smile as she does so. She turns off the light. "is there anything you want to say?" I ask her. She looks up at me. "good night" she replies to me. I turn on the light that's on my side of our bed. "Do you want to talk about this?" I ask her. "about what?" she ask me, turning towards me. "Kim, remember when you were breast feeding Sam and the door opened and this guy walks in and you screamed at him in horror and shame? Hat was me" I told her, laughing at the end. She smiled at me. "I thought I recognized you? Good night" she said, patting my thigh. I looked just sat there shaking my head with this appalled look on my face. "good night" she said, turning away from me. "I just want you to know that I don't think you're a bad mother" I confessed. "what does that mean?!" she asked me, as she sat up, holding our comforter to her chest. "I'm just saying that if you kos, ou wanna keep breast feeding Sammy for a few months, I don't think it nessicarlly means your some sort of freak" I explained to her. Her mouth widenEd in pahock as she sat up more in our Ed. "hmmm, now you're calling me a freak" she observed. "hey, don't turn this around on me. I mean if you thought you were acting so normal, how come when I walked in you shoved my sons head under your nightgown like you were shop lifting s ham" I defended myself. She glared at me then got up out of our bed and made her way to our bathroom. "you just don't understand!" she fought back. "oh come on, Kim! Give me some credit, ok? I do read some of those books you give me. I know how hard it is for a first time mother to stop breast feeding! You're having- you're having trouble separating from your son! I mean you 2 have this precious bond and you're afraid you're severing this intamate connection with your child!" I explain to her.
She walks over the bathroom. "I'm doing it for the boobs, alright!? The boobs!" she shouts, waving her hands in the air. I look at her, shocked. "what?" I question her. She sighs, putting her hands back down at her sides. "I like having big boobs! Big, milk filled boobs!" she confesses, smiling down at her breasts. "and I never had anything like these before and I'm not ready give them back!" she exclaims, walking over to our dresser. I get up out of bed and walk over to her. "come on, Kim! You knew when you got them, they were just rentals !" I exclaimed. "I mean, like that convertible we had on vacation. Yeah, it was fun and exciting, but it's time to get back to our- our dependable, everyday car" I explained to her. Kim turns around and faces me. "which always gets me where I need to go" I mutter. "it's not that easy, jack! I mean, what if for a few days, you had a really big penis?!" she exclaimsm walking around the room. My mouth widens in shock. "what are you saying?!" I question her. She sighs, angrily. "that I've become very attached to them!" she cried, putting her hands on her breasts. "they're fantastic! It's- it's like they have magic powers! Men see them and just go into a trance! I swear, I think that I could robb a bank with these things!" she confesses, smiling proudly. I walk over to her. "when you say big penis, you mean like repulsively big, right?" I ask her. "like circus big!" I add. She smiles. "come on! Admit it! You like these things, too" Kim says, happily. "oh, well, of course I do, but it's just gonna be a little creepy sharing them with my 10 year old son" I replied. She then began to walk away from me, annoyed. "Kim, when I fell in love, I fell in love with the petite, perky Kim. I'm gonna love you no matter what you look like" I told her, rubbing her shoulders. She turns toward me. "what if they never go back to the way they were? They've been through a lot lately" Kim explained to me. "come on! How much can it change?" I asked her. "remember my mother at the beach?" she asked me. I then shook my head, disgustingly. "I am going to love you no matter what you look like" I told her, hugging her. "thank you" she told me.
we then pulled apart from our hug. I sat on our bed with her standing in front of me. "what do you think we should do about this?" I asked her. She sighed. "I guess tomorrow when he wakes up, we can try to give him the bottle" Kim agreed. I nodded. "I think that would be best" I told her. I then kissed her lips softly. "now get in the bed, you little sneak" I told Kim, as I spanked her. She then crawled into bed. I climbed into bed, turned off my light and she wrapped her arms around me. I turned back on the light. "ok, I'm not going to able to sleep. What you say, babe?" I ask he. She shakes her head, laughing and smiling.
Kims pov
"I don't know, Kim. It seems like an awful of of trouble just for bigger jugs" tiana told , pouring cereal into a bowl. I glared at her from the kitchen sink. "I knew you wouldn't understand! You got all the breasts in the family!" I told her. "hey, you want half my chest. Fine, but you're gonna have to take half my butt, too" tiana said, holding her spoon in the air. He then walked over to the table and set down the bowl of cereal next To Jerry. "hey, don't give that away. I like that. You know, if get rid of something, get rid of those feet!" Jerry told tiana, earning a slap on the back of the head from her. "we just wanted some advice about weaning the baby" I said, pouring cereal into my bowl. "oh god! That is gonna be pure hell!" Jerry told me. "why?" I asked him. "I mean that boob is pretty important to him. Mean, think about how much grown men ink about breasts and they don't even get those for breakfast" Jerry explains. I glare at him. Jack then walked over to the table. "wouldnt it be cool if pancakes came out of them?" jack asked, I looked at him, shaking my head and laughing a bit.
"hey, Kim just don't worry about it. Ok, look, it's gonna be a rough couple of nights, but it's not gonna be bad. Trust me" tiana advised me. I nodded, eating my cereal. "yeah, we can do it!" jack told me. "we?!" tiana asked him. "yeah I'm gonna be there. I happen to be the kind of father, who wants to be involved in raising their son" jack explained to tiana, wrappings is arm around her. "were a team!" he said, side hugging me "uh, jack Kim can't be there. You gotta do this alone" tiana told jack.
Jacks pov
But, we're a team" I told tiana, nervously. "why can't she be there? Why cant you be there?" I asked, rapidly. "all the books say its too hard for the child if the mothers still in the room" Kim told me. "yeah, think about it. Would you take a bottle if you get it straight from a tap?" Jerry asked me. Kim and I just stated at him. "well, that's not fair! I had to cut the umbilical cord. I had to witness the the circumcision. Now, I have to rip him away from the thing he loves most?" i exclaimed. Kim looked up at me. "why does the father have all the hard stuff?" I ask. "honey, I passed an entire human being bright my body" Kim pointed out. "yeah, but ..." I start. "stay down, stay down" Kerry says, putting his hand on my right arm. I glared at him.
Kim's pov
It's 11:35 and guess what? SAMs crying! I wake up. "jack!" I say, trying to wake jack up. Won't wake up. "jack!" I say, turning on the light. "what?" he asks me, waking up. "he's crying" I tel him, handing him SAMs bottle.
Jacks pov
"oh yeah. I got him" I say, getting out of our bed and putting on my slippers. I groan, setting the bottle on our dresser and grabbing my bath robe. I put it on. I then grab the bottle and get back into bed. "jack! You have to go in there!" she says, shaking me. "again?" I ask her. "alright, I didn't want to do this, but here come the cold feet!" she says, putting her cold feet on my legs. "whoa! Whoa! Whoa! I'm up! I'm up!" I exclaim, getting out of bed. "still think you should see a doctor about those" I tell her, before leaving the room. "good luck!" I hear her say from our room.
I walk into SAMs room and turn on his light. He's standing up in his crib. "hey Sammy! Look who it is! It's your daddy!" I greet him. He cries. "good to see you, too!" I say, closing the door. "I know youre hungry ! Look what I brought for you! A bottle!" I say. He just cries.
Kim's pov
Im sitting on jacks and my bed listening to the baby monitor. "come on! Don't be like that" I hear jack tell a crying Sam.
Jacks pov
"come on. It's time to take a bottle, big guy" I tell a crying Sam. "big boys don't like boobies!" I tell him. He cries again. "well, yes they do, but not for what you do with them! Well, that's not really true!" I tell him, smiling.
Kim's pov
I over hear jack from the baby monitor, sigh and roll my eyes in disgust!
Jacks pov
"wanna hold it yourself?" I say, handing Sam the baby bottle, but he won't take it. "come here" I tell him, trying to hand him the bottle. "you wanna hold it yourself? Here, come on. Hold the bottle" I tell nine just cries. "come on! that's it! We don't need mommy! This is how big boys do it!" I say, finally getting him to hold the bottle.
Kim's pov
I overhear jack and Sam from the baby monitor and smile. I think we're getting somewhere! Then I here the bottle spill all over jack! I get up off of our bed and rush to SAMs room. "did he throw the bottle?" I ask jack from outside the door. "it's under control. I got it!" jack tells me. "did you wipe the nipple off?" I ask him. He opens the door. "I didn't have to. Most of it got on my stomach" jack tells me. Not you nipple! The nipple on the bottle!" I exclaim. "oh! Yeah! Go back to bed! He's not suppose to see you!" jack tells me. "oh he looks so sad!" I cry, looking at Sam. "Kim, we all look sad! It's 3 am! Go to bed!" jack tells me. I have my hands on my chest in sadness as I look at our son. "he likes the Mozart cd, but-but skip track 1 because the bassoon frightens him" I explain to jack. "do you want to do 'cause ill just go back to bed?" jack asks me. "you know I can't!" I tell jack. "well, leave me alone so I can! The faster you get out of here, the faster itll be done. I dont want to do this night sfter night!" he tells me. I sigh. "youre right. You're right. This to be done tonight. Good night" I give in. "good night!" jack tells me, closing the door to SAMs room. I listen to sams crying against the door for a few minutes before bursting into the room. "you know maybe I should-" I start, but jack cuts me off. "Kim! You're killing me here! He's not supposed to see you!" he tells me. Sam cries. "no, Sammy. It's not mommy. It's some crazy lady in a mommy mask" jack tells sm. "I'll be right back, Sammy" he tells Sam before he walks out of the room with me.
"I'm sorry. I can't listen to him cry!" I confess, as jack closes the door behind us. "I thought this was about the boobs" jack tells me. "so did I, but my son needs me and I can't it!" I shout. "I knowthis is tough, but it's just 1 of those painful parts of being a parent. It's like when Sammy was born and you made me sell my motorcycle" jacme explains to me. "you mean your scooter?" I ask him. "my point is it was hard to part with my motorcycle" jack explains to me. "your scooter" I correct him. "whatever! Just let me do this!" she shouts. "listen, you know you can do it. Just go to the guest house and stay with tiana. " he tells me. "fine" I cave in. "just let me say goodnight to sam" I tell him, barging into SAMs room. I walk over to SAMs crib. "nighty night, Sammy whammy! I say, picking up him in my arms. He stops crying. "mommy loves you and mommy will always be here for my little pumpy-kin" I tell him, kissing his cheek. "oh, yes she will because you are the sweetest, cutest little munchy-kin-" I tell him, but jack interrupts me. "Kim" he tells me, putting his hand on my shoulder. "don't rush me!" I warned jack through gritted teeth, still talking in my baby voice. "goodnight, Sammy" I tell him, kissing his head. "good night" I tell him again, handing him to jack. "hey! Let's do this pal!" jack says, holding sam in his arms. I walk out of the room and close the door behind me.
Jacks pov
"huh? Let's do this" I tell Sam. "here I got an idea. A little Mozart" I say, turning on the radio sitting on his nightstand."oh, the bassoon. Let you calm down and well try this bottle thing again" I say, sitting down the rocking chair with Sam in my arms. "I feel like we're bonding already" I cradle Sam to my chest, who begins to suck on my nipple. "ow! Ow!" I shout, pulling him away from my nipple and facing him in front of me. I look at him then my nipple.
"twinkle, twinkle, little star. How I wonder what you are. Please don't make this night so hard. Take the bottle, little guy. I'm so tired that I could cry. If you will not go to bed, please shoot daddy in his head" I sang to Sam. "Sam, come on! Drink from the bottle! I'm running out of songs!" I told Sam, who cried. "here's another one. ok. Boogie nights. Ain't no doubt. We are here til mornin. Til mornin. Boogie nights! Aint no doubt! Get that party started! Drink from the bottle, big guy. 'cause rubber nipples are somethin' somethin' that rhymes with guy. Gotta drink for daddy" I sing.
Just then, jerry knocks on SAMs door and walks into the room. "hey" he greets me. "what are doing up here?!" I ask him. "I spent an hour and a half getting tiana up to all right, but make it quick and then your wife showed up" Jerry explained to me. "sorry about that"I apologized. "oh, it's alright. If she was really into it, she would have taken her finger out of the book" Jerry told me. "how's it goin'?" he asked me. "how does it look like its going? It's horrible. I mean, youve been through this before. Can you please give me some advice?" I ask him. "well, like what?" Jerry asked me. "like what would make you want a rubber nipple?" I asked him. "well maybe right now if it was part of a larger rubber woman" he told me. "ha, thanks" I said, sarcastically. "come on! Come on! I know you can do this! You can handle it! I know you can! you're a good father! So listen, if it gets really bad and he starts screaming his head off, just remember, I'm right down stairs on the couch. So shut the door" he told me, leaving the room.
Jerrys pov
"nana, I'm living in my brother in laws guest house. Yeah. We probably won't stay here too long. I mean I don't like taking advantage of people, you know. So how's Sweden?" I tell my grandma, who I'm on the phone with. Tiana then walks into the house. "listen, I have to go. So move my night to king 5. No. No. Ent be silly. I'll call you" I say before hanging up. "what are you doing down here?" I ask tiana. "oh, Kims all worked up over there. I came in to get something to quiet her down" she tells me, taking a sip of her wine. "that should drown her out" she tells me. I get up off of the chair and walk over to her. "you know, you amaze me. You got the kids to sleep. Youre helping out your sister. You're taking care of everyone and you know, i know I don't tell this enough, but you're and unreliable woman and I love you" I tell her. "Jerry, I'm not going to have sex with you in their kitchen" she tells me. "hey, I seen you drinking and figured I'd take a shot" I told her. SHe kisses me and goes back to the guest house.
Jack then walks down the stairs. "what's going on?" I asked him. "this is nuts! This is crazy! I've tried everything! Everything! I even offered him $500.00 to take the bottle and he still refuses. He's not being rational" he tells me. "if you give me $250, I'll drink from the bottle and feed him like a mother bird" I tell him. "look, I've got to be up in 2 hours. Well try this in the morning" jack tells me, walking into the kitchen. "whoa, whoa, where you going?" I asked him. "I'm going to get Kim. we'll this another night. I quit" jack gives in. "you cant just quit. Is is a battle of wills with you and your child. You give in now, you know what you're teaching him? That if cries, carries on long enough, he'll get whatever he wants and then my friend, you're no longer that sweet little boys father. Youre his bitch" he tells me, making me laugh. "ok, this is the first of many times, you hae to stick to your guns. Ok? next year, when it's time to toilet him, will he want to do it? No, but you're gonna have to make him like our parents did to us and thank god they did because it's the most important achievement in our lives" Jerry tells me. "I think I've had a lot of accomplishments that rank higher than using the potty" jack tells me. "setting 3 state swimming championships, joining college" I tell Jerry, "i don't care if you disco ered a cure for cancer, in your songs. No ones having lunch with you" Jerry tells me.
Jacks pov
We walk into jack and Kims room. "he want his mommy? Give him his mommyo" Jerry tells me. "what are taking about?" I ask him. "it's not that hard to fool a 1 year old. Dominic still thinks the race track is the horse stables" Jerry told me. He sprayed perfume on me. "it would help if you smelt a lot like Kim" Jerry told me. "Kim doesn't wear perfume at night" I tell him. "why not?" jerry asks me. "'cause she's not a hooker!" I exclaim. "fine, o natural. We can work with that" Jerry, says beginning to dig through Kim's chest. "what are you doing?" I ask him. "looking for something that smells like Kim" Jerry says, digging through the chest. "trust me" he says, smelling a white nightgown. "oh yeah! She's coming on strong on this one!" Jerry says. "give me that!" I say, snatching the nightgown from Jerry. "wrap it around you!" Jerry demands. "what?" I ask him. He sighs. "ok, look. I didn't want to have to admit this, but, um, when I weaned Logan and Dominic, they only way the bottle was if, uh, I dressed up like tiana" he confessed. I smiled and lauded a bit. "what?" I asked him. "I put on tiana's clothes and pretended to be her" he told me. "frst of all, there goes the father/son camping trip. Second of all, no!" I told him. "ok, we'll do it your way. Oh, wait, you don't have a way!" Jerry tells me. I looked down and sigh. "this will never work. I'm only going to do it because I'm completely exhausted. I've obviously lost my mind. Where's the damn neck hole?!" I ramble, putting on the night gown. "just focus on the positve. I think that color looks fabulous on you" Jerry admits to me once I have the nightgown on. I picked up the bottle. "I guess I'm ready for my father son moment!" I say, walking out of kims and my room, with Jerry following behind me.
Sams crying his head off when we enter the room. "Kay, buddy, let's do this" I said. "hold on, you just can't walk in with your breast hanging in your hand like that. You'll traumatize the kid" Jerry tels me. "you gotta put it where it belongs" Jerry tells me, taking the bottle from me. "hold" he tells me, putting it underneath the night gown where my nipple. I sigh. I begin to walk over to Sam, but Kerry stops me. He then plays with the nipple on the bottle. "cut it out!" I shout. He then walks over to Sams crib and picks him up. "it may feel a bit odd" he warns me. "I'll be fine, as long as it works" I tell Jerry, as he latches Sam onto the bottle. "oh my god! He's drinking!" I say, happily as Sam drinks from the bottle. "he's drinking from my breast! My sons drinking from my breast!" I say, happily. "ok, now I feel a little odd" I admit. "I told ya. It's working. Look!" Jerry tells me, walking Sam and I over to SAMs mirror. "me, you and Sammy! We did it!" he says, showing me Sam drinking from my breast. "but stand facing this way, ok?" I say, tuning away frothe mirror. "way to go, buddy. Drink up." I praise Sam. "hey, Sammy" Jerry tells Sam. "I'm proud of you" I tell Sam. "how many nights did you have to dress up like tiana?" I asked Jerry. "jack?" he starts. "you really didn't dress as tiana, did you" I realized. "nope" he tells me, shaking his head.
Kims pov
(the next night)
Im lying bed, but jacks not there. The baby monitors quiet. What's going on? I get up out of bed and walk over to sams room. I open the door. "don't come in here!" jack shouts. "what are you doing?" I asked jack. "nothing! Get out!" he shouted. God, he sounds just like I did! "get out!" he shouts again. I walk out of sams room and close the door behind me.
So what'd think? Thanks for the favorites and the reveiw! Keep them coming! PleaseAt and r! If there's a show you want to see made kickin it style let me know and I'll see what I can do! Please read and review! I'll update soon! Love you all and keep rocking!