Hey. So this is a pretty dark chapter, very intense. I know this story is rated T, but for the sake of this chapter I'm giving it the rating on T+ / M.

Kitty POV

Same Day...

After that Honey Boo-Boo, kick-ass whale—Marley, I meant, left the bathroom I continued to cry. Everything began to hurt me all over again. My body, my head, my heart and my sense of dignity.

I've lost my identity I'm no longer Kathleen Susan Wilde, nor am I Kitty or Kitty Wilde or even Kitty Bitchy Cheerleader. I lost sense of ever trying to leave home, learning to accept that I can't be saved without the harm that Kathy and I will be split up into different homes and possibly never see each other again. I've lost hope that New Directions will accept me back into their family. I've lost hope that I will never have a perfect family as perfect as the perfect kids in New Directions. I've given up on having a mother and having to raise my little sister as my own baby. I've lost the dreams of being a normal child in this world. I've lost just about everything. I've lost my sense of mind. I've lost my dignity. But there was one important thing that I lost that made me who I am. It was who I am.

I lost my virginity. And I didn't want to lose it.

Last Night...

I got home from picking up Kathy from Ryder's place. His mother was an angel. Mrs. Lynn had given Kathy some old toys that Ryder's little sister, Molly, used to play with as well as some old clothes from when Molly was as young as Kathy. I told her she didn't need to, but she smiled warmly and said it wasn't a big deal. Ryder's father, Mr. Lynn, also gave me some of the leftover food they had from a party he and Mrs. Lynn held last night. There was plenty of sweets for all to go around, he told me.

I got home and whilst Kathy played with some of her new used toys I put the new used clothes in the washer. While they washed I packed away some of the sweets upstairs in my closet so that Phil wouldn't find them and so Kathy and I could have some food other than just order out every night. After a while I took them out of the washer, put them in the dryer, and went back up to play some sort of doll game with Kathy.

From the constant screaming and yelling I had hoped that Kathy forgot it all and grows up normal.

I tucked Kathy into bed by seven. I had gone to the mall and got myself a sleeping bag so that I could be more comfortable on the floor and Kathy could have the bed. Once she was tucked in I began reading Cinderella to her. It was her favorite fairy tale story; the wicked step parent that doesn't give the total respect to Cinderella and in the end, through all the crazy obstacles she had to go through, Cinderella still had her happily ever after fairy tale with her Prince. I kissed Kathy on the head, tucked her in a little bit more than I turned the lights off and closed the door.

Downstairs I was cleaning up knowing that Phil would be coming home soon and that he'd kick my ass, literally, if "his house" was a mess. I got halfway done with the dishes when I heard the door slam open and Phil's voice call out my name.

"Where the fuck are you, you little bitch!?" His voice was angry. He came into the kitchen and saw me. "There you are, how fucking dare you embarrass me at work when I did absolutely nothing to you and the brat? NOTHING!"

"I didn't do anything. I did nothing there but listen to you. I tried to avoid that Shirley lady—"

"You didn't even try!" Phil screeched again.

"I did! And stop screaming you'll wake the baby up!" I yelled loudly.

"Shut up!" Phil screamed. He grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the kitchen. "Did you eat anything she gave you?"

"No!" I screeched again. "Please! Let go of me!" I began to cry as I felt as if his bones were crushing me. "Please!"

He brought me into the bathroom and shoved me hard onto the floor. He yelled, "You know the drill, bitch."

I didn't want to do that. But I knew kick my ass if I didn't I moved myself over the toilet and shoved my fingers to the back of my throat. It wasn't working, I was gagging and gagging, but nothing happened. I cried and tried to think of what Phil would do to me. I looked up at him and said, "I tired! I told you, I ate nothing."

Phil muttered something before he left the bathroom and said, "Make me pasta. Just pasta."

I cried for several minutes until I got enough energy to get up and make the dumb ass his food.

Present Day

I cried. Knowing what happened next. After what happened when Phil had too many to drink.

Last night

About two and a half hours later I was upstairs changing into my pajamas. That's when I heard Phil slamming his boots up the stairs, drunk as ever, and opened the door. His drunk eyes gazed over to me, taking another chug at his bottle of beer, and tossing it on the ground. Shakily he pointed his finger up at me and in a deep, drunk, angry voice he shouted at me.

"You bitch!"

He charged right at me. I dodged him and began running to the door. I planned on running into my room and lock the door from the other side and pray to Princess of Hope and Fate that nothing would happen and that in the morning Phil would had been cooled off by then.

But by the time I got to the middle of the hallway I felt someone grasp my ponytail, tugged at it hard that it pulled me back to the ground, and Phil dragged me back into the bedroom. "Susan you little whore, you slut, you leave me alone with those two brats that aren't even my own fuckin' sperm?"

"Phil! Please!" I yelled, crying. "It's me! Kathleen!"

He didn't say anything to that comment. He just continued on his own words. "And you fuckin' run off with other guys? I'm gonna teach you a lesson you'll NEVER FORGET!" He screeched as we got into the room. he slammed the door and locked it.

I felt him give me bruises; on my back and my stomach. I felt as if my bones were starting to break. Everything was rapid and quick and the next thing I knew he was on top of me and telling 'Susan' to shut the hell up. When I cried out and told him to stop, he slapped 'Susan', me, and just told me to shut up. With a hand over my mouth he said, "Shut the hell up or I'll fuckin' murder that little brat of the two. Anna or whatever her name is."

The next thing I knew I felt something break my walls, it came out, then back into again. It continued without stopping for me to adjust to anything. Hard and it killed. His hand was still over my mouth as he pounded himself inside of me. Harder each time, ignoring my screeching bawls of pain and the waterfalls down my face. He climaxed, then I did.

He did it again.

Then again.

And a final time.

By the end he was asleep, drunk as fuck and tired from this game. After a few minutes I got out of his arms and gathered my silk pajamas and left the room. I was shaking, teary eyed, and the pain in between my legs killed.

I entered the bathroom and turned the water on. I felt disgusting. I was disgusting. I couldn't believe what the fuck just happened.

I stepped into the hot shower and let the water hit my bruises. Washing away the dirty deeds that had been done to me just minutes ago. I tried to keep my mind off of it by thinking of a much nicer place. Kathy and I on a beach in California, playing in the sand and swimming in the water. I loathed the water and the gross sticky sand, but I knew Kathy loved it and I would do anything for her now.

I stayed in the shower until I felt the revolting Phil wash off of me, to the point where I felt as if the burning water was burning me alive. I rubbed hard to make extra sure that his dirty deeds was off my skin.

I got out of the bathroom and wrapped myself into a fluffy warm towel, gathered my dirty clothes and left my bathroom. I went into the kitchen and threw my now stained clothes into the trash and brought the trash outside, freezing my ass off in the winter cold, and came back inside.

I went upstairs and put on some old baggy shirt and a pair of sweatpants that I found in a drawer. I then snuggled into my sleeping bag, facing away from the window. "Screw everything." I said then cried for the rest of the night.

Present Day.

I cried again, feeling disgusting with myself. I didn't sleep last night and I knew I wouldn't for a few days. I just wanted to...

Die.

I left the bathroom, left the school, and made it to the range rover. I cried getting inside and driving away.

Wishing I was Marley Rose.