Hello, people! Nightlingbolt here! Welcome to Chapter 2 of Death the Kid T-Shirt!

So if you've also read Allergic to Soy, you'll notice that I start to stray from that a bit. Well, I'm taking this in a different direction. Figured out ways to incorporate different characters into this particular canon. Expect Bacchus and Cana to show up (and expect them together, if you catch my drift).

I do not own Fairy Tail or its characters, Hiro Mashima does.

Here's the thing about Fairy Tail: the barista that takes your order hardly ever makes it. Which works out great for me, since I have an opportunity to pick up Natsu because of it.

"So... nice weather we're having."

"...Yeah," he replies.

That "yeah" has me hating myself. Why am I talking about the weather?! I mean, here I am, standing in his doorway with nothing to say besides some comment on the goddamn weather!

Say what you will about Batman and Robin, Foolish Games is an awesome song.

"Do you... come here often?" I ask.

"Well, I work here, so... yeah, kind of," Natsu points out.

Great. Just great. Way to go, Scarlet.

You know how your teachers all say there are no stupid questions? Well, that's all a bunch of shit, because I'm pretty sure asking a barista at your favorite coffee shop if he "comes here often" qualifies as a stupid question.

"You know, I'm actually a regular here," I say. "So I guess we'll see each other pretty often."

"Great," says Natsu. "Looking forward to it."

"Really?"

"Like I look forward to the Fire Temple every time I play Ocarina of Time."

Holy crap! He's just as much of a Zelda nerd as I am!

This motherfucker. THIS. MOTHERFUCKER.

Before I can reply, my order gets called. I take my caramel mocha latte with whipped cream and say goodbye to Natsu.

"And by the way," he says. "I meant that Fire Temple comment because I like fire levels."

Whew! I thought that meant he'd never want to see me again! That would kind of suck, because then I'd have to find another coffee shop just to avoid him. And like hell I'm going to Starbucks if I can help it.

I find an open booth. Why sit at a table when you can sit in a booth, am I right?

Placing my latte on the table and my backpack on the seat, I pull out my laptop and boot it up. Once I'm online, I load Facebook. I'm not the biggest Facebook user, but hey, I like to be in the loop.

What immediately greets me is a status from my high school best friend, Millianna, declaring, and I quote, "Congratulations, Jellal Fernandes and Ultear Milkovich!"

I scroll down the comments. Jellal and this Ultear woman thank Millianna, and she asks when the "big day" is. It's obvious to me that Jellal is getting married.

On second thought, fuck the loop.

Fortunately, I still have his cell number, so I can call him, just to be sure. I mean, it's not like I care whether Jellal marries another woman. Our colleges are on opposite sides of the country, and we both agreed not to bother with the long-distance thing. It's just that we're childhood friends, and I don't want him marrying some floozie, especially at 20 years old.

...That made it sound like I care, didn't it?

Fuck, I do care.

Closing my laptop, I grab it and my latte and head on out of there. I just want to punch something, but I think I'll settle for screaming my lungs out.

I watch as the redhead I just served storms out of the shop. At first I just pass it off as Gray getting her order wrong, which honestly wouldn't surprise me. Then I remember he was Employee of the Month last month, which kind of pisses me off, because I want to think Gray screwed up.

Suddenly, I hear a loud F-bomb go off. Yup. Red's pissed about something. Ain't goin' out there for a while.

Shit, what's that smell? Don't tell me it's the garbage! Fuck, Laxus is probably gonna make me take it out!

Sigh.

Guess I'll just bite the bullet and take it out. Even though that scary redhead is out there.

So I take the bag and head out back, and just as I reach for the door, I hear the sound of metal on concrete. Great, she knocked the dumpster over. I look over at Lucy, who happens to be sweeping, and she shrugs.

"Guess no one ever told you about Erza's temper," she says.

"Thanks," I say flatly, and I go outside to check on her.

Looking at the spilled garbage, then at the girl, I say, "You know I gotta clean that up, right?" I only get a glare in reply.

Okay, so she's obviously pissed about something. "Mind telling me what's wrong?" I ask.

She hesitates a minute before saying, "My Latin professor just moved an assignment due next Friday to this Friday."

"And that's worth tipping over a dumpster?" I ask.

"Latin's hella hard," she says.

"English major, huh?" I say with a smile. "What circle of hell are you on so far?"

"I don't even wanna think about the Inferno at this point. I still need to trudge through the Divine Comedy," she says.

"Yay for being a science major, then," I say.

"Yeah. Goody goody gumdrops for you," she shoots back.

I shrug. "Look, I gotta get this shit cleaned up, but maybe we could hang out some time, huh?" I have no idea why I asked her that. Now she probably thinks I'm a weird stalker.

Well, I did randomly allude to Ocarina of Time without even knowing if she liked Zelda, so...

The girl smiles. "Maybe some time when I'm not working," she says. "But I have one question."

"Shoot."

"How did you know I play Zelda?"

"Your backpack had a Triforce sewn onto it," I point out.

"Maybe I just like triangles," she shoots back.

"Yellow ones?"

"Yellow's a bright, happy color," she says.

"Right," I say. "See you around, uhhh..."

"Erza," she says. "Erza Scarlet."

"Well then, Erza Scarlet, Natsu Dragneel will see you around." With that, I shoo her away so I can scoop the garbage back into the dumpster.

As I get the gloves and the hose, I think back to that story Erza told me about her Latin professor. She took a while to come up with a story. Something else is bothering her, and I'd like to know what. But if she wants to tell me, she will. Not like it's any of my business, anyway.

For now, I got trash to clean up.

And there ya go.

As the chapter was wrapping up, I realized Natsu's Fire Temple comment was completely out of left field, so I figured, since I already established Erza as a Zelda fan, I'd make her backpack have a Triforce on it. So now you know.

Also, I should probably experiment more with the whole alternate universe thing. But I feel like using an alternate universe as an excuse for OOCness is flat-out lazy. I'll try to find a good balance, but I can't say for sure how everything will turn out. For now, peace and love from Nightlingbolt. Good-bye.