Author's PenName: Dysis Nyx

Author's Note: I have no idea what to write in this space. I feel an odd obligation to just because I can. Oh well, move on reading, I guess shrugs

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the "Troy" characters, while I do agree with those delicious outfits the men wear. growls playfully

continued

Waiting by with the horses, Patroclus sat and waited as patient as possible. Achilles had been upset with him the entire way, but that was okay since Patroclus was mad at Achilles, too.

Letting out a huge sigh, Patroclus knew he was lying to himself. It wasn't Achilles he was mad at now. It was himself. No matter how hard he trained, he was always a child, a boy, practically a baby to Achilles. He wanted to prove himself just as the Myrmidons did every time they fought in Achilles' name. He was older now and far more mature, but he was still a boy to Achilles. Would anything ever change?

Achilles fiddled around in the water as his mother lay at his feet his choice. Glory or life? To be remembered or to live on with a family? This was his choice and, sadly, he already knew the answer.

When he started to move away to leave his mother called out, "Achilles, son, the boy will die."

Catching his attention, Achilles turned back towards his mother. With his brow raised he watched her warily. Her voice explained tenderly, "If your cousin fights, he will die. His own blood will be the only thing to warm him as he dies, because you couldn't protect him."

Achilles took a deadly step towards his mother and shouted, "Lies! Patroclus will never fight. I will not allow it! If he does not fight, then he does not die. Patroclus will never know war and I will see to it."

A soothing hand cupped his cheek, "Oh, my son, you may hold your fate, but his is not your choice. If you go to Troy, he will follow you and he will fight." she gave a small nymph laugh and added, "No matter what words you use, Patroclus will follow blindly to Troy."

Sighing in defeat, Achilles' shoulders relaxed as he muttered, "I know, mother, but I will not allow him to die in battle. He will stay by my side, but not in battle."

Turning to collect more shells, Thetis turned away from her son and said, "Bend your way to home, I will follow along shortly. Your companion is growing very restless."

Casting his mother a kiss to the cheek Achilles left back to where Patroclus waited with the horses and equipment. His mother was correct, the minute his face was seen by Patroclus, his face lit up. The lad had been waiting impatiently since he left. At the sight of him, Patroclus had brightened up.

Patroclus asked indifferently, "To your father's house now?"

Achilles laughed as he mounted his steed, "Your indifference was dropped when your eyes lit at my presence. Drop the act, Patroclus."

When Patroclus looked to the ground Achilles knew there was something seriously bothering him. A small pang swept through Achilles at the sight of Patroclus so upset. It rendered him completely paralyzed. His voice turned cold as he hid any sound of emotion or feeling, "What bothers you, boy?"

Patroclus kept his gaze down as he explained, "I am nothing to you, Achilles. I am forever useless and a burden. It has been that way since I was put under your watch. No matter how I train and practice, I am still a child to you. I want to be a man in your eyes, not a boy."

The words of Patroclus kept Achilles paralyzed, but he lost control of his tongue, "It is true that I have held your hand through these past years training you. But to say you are nothing? You, Patroclus, are the remaining humanity I have left."

Letting out a scoff, Patroclus asked doubtfully, "What does that mean? I am your amusement? The monkey to laugh at? The small child to train?" Patroclus continued with a mutter, "I am not even counted as your friend, just cousin."

Achilles stopped his horse and grabbed the reins of Patroclus'. His words were a controlled angry, "You insult me, Patroclus. You are acting like a spoiled child. I will not have such disobedience. All I have done is to protect you, to help you."

"I did not mean to insult, my lord."

Achilles flung the reins back at the boy and snarled, "You spat at me, boy! Your words were venom. No more talk!"

Achilles dug his heels into the horse's sides and rode on ahead.

Sometimes Patroclus didn't know what to make of his cousin. The man was very stoic and proud warrior. What did one make of that? Usually Achilles and him never fought, but there was something coming in the next days that Patroclus sensed would change both of them forever.

Kicking his own horse, Patroclus caught up to Achilles. They rode side by side and Patroclus asked, "What did your mother have to say?"

Achilles let out the anger in one breath and answered, "If I stay, I will have a wife with children, but I will be forgotten. If I go to Troy I will be glorified for ages to come, but I will never return." turning to Patroclus and asked, "What would you do, cousin?"

"I would go to Troy. You deserve to be remembered, Achilles. Capture glory, Achilles. Plus, the great Achilles is invincible. There is no weakness in you."

Achilles gave an indignant laugh as he countered, "I have, but one. No one will learn of it, though."

Patroclus' brow perked up in interest as he prepared to ask, "Can you not tell me, cousin? You know I could never bring harm onto you."

Achilles gave him a droll stared and replied bored, "Patroclus, I once thought you a simple flea not fit for dogs. Now, if any man was to cause you harm, I would have his head."

By the flash of anger at the end of Achilles' words, Patroclus knew he was dead serious. Never had Patroclus seen such a look of death cast toward him. The look wasn't meant for him, but it was still cast in his direction. There was no lie in Achilles.

Patroclus tried to lighten the mood with joking, "If we do go to Troy, do you think there will be many pretty women there to satisfy our--"

Achilles held up a hand and chided, "First, you are to young for a woman. Second, we are going to war, not on a day of rest. Third, who said you would be coming?"

Now severely worried over leaving Achilles' side Patroclus defended, "I am to stay? I will go, cousin. I will not remain, Achilles. I am to serve you!"

Luckily, they had reached the home before anymore was said. Slaves came to take the horses. Both men headed into the house. Seeing Patroclus slightly peeved at him, Achilles placed his arm around the boy's shoulders. He leaned to whisper in his ear, "I do no think I could have you stay behind anyway. I have grown accustomed to seeing your face."

Patroclus elbowed Achilles side, but the arm didn't remove itself. Suddenly jovial Patroclus added, "Yes, however would the mighty Achilles go on without the ability to call out 'Patroclus!' and have no one to come within seconds?"

Achilles smiled, "Minutes, even. I fear it would be chaos."

When they arrived to the dining area. Peleus gave Achilles an angry glare as he waited for him to sit.
As dinner dragged on, Achilles and Patroclus sat in there usual place at the farthest end of Peleus' table. They joked and talked throughout dinner. It was an extremely happy dinner until Peleus called out suddenly, "Achilles! When will that boy be ready to serve as a soldier? He has proved to be nothing but useless. His training should be completed soon, yes?"

Rising to his feet, Achilles answered stoically, "No, father, he will not. Patroclus is a good student, but he is still too young."

Peleus gave a short laugh, "Ha! Give up, Achilles, the boy will never be you. He will make a good foot soldier, though. Finish up his training immediately."

With that the man went back to his other company and dinner. While nothing was right between Achilles and Patroclus anymore. Achilles could see the boy's embarrassment. Peleus had humiliated Patroclus in front of the entire room.

When Achilles attempted to go back to his food, he saw Patroclus rise to his feet and storm out. He was growing restless and Achilles could have spotted that even if he was blind. Patroclus was coming of age and he was very much a man.

Deciding to follow after him, Achilles rose to his feet and exited out of the same door Patroclus had taken.

He found the lad stalking of to his room. Following him from behind, Achilles noticed how unchildlike Patroclus was now. He was nearly as tall as him. His build was only slightly smaller than Achilles' own muscles. The boy's hair grew to his shoulders in brown tresses and hung loose. He had earned no braids yet, unlike Achilles' golden blonde locks.

Feeling a warming of his muscles, Achilles called out, "Patroclus! Did I give you permission to leave?"

Watching as Patroclus stopped, but didn't turn around Achilles prepared for the boy's scorn. Instead, his words were controlled while angry and humiliated, "I do not expect to be as great as you, cousin. You will be great and glorified. My name will never be remembered. I am only the cousin to Achilles, I am forever trapped in your shadow. You keep me there! I fear I will always be a soldier in training. Will I ever be a man to you, Achilles?"

His mind escaped him as Achilles forced Patroclus into his room. For some reason, Achilles' brain had shut off and decided not to work. One look to Patroclus' face and now he was gone. Even his words were not his own, "I will remember you, Patroclus. Your name will always be mentioned whenever mine has been uttered."

On that he placed his hands on either side of the boy's face and kissed him with so much passion. There was a heat there and Achilles could not have stopped for his life. This was just one kiss, but his gut told him more was to follow.

to be continued