Author PenName: Dysis Nyx
Author's Note: The final chapter before the epilogue…bumbumBUM! I hope you like it.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the "Troy" characters.
He stood over the mutilated corpse of Hector and spat into the sand, "I am giving you more than you deserve, Hector. I do this out of respect for your father and for care of Patroclus. I do not do it for you."
"No, but you should do it for you."
Achilles looked up to the concerned smirk of Patroclus standing across the body from him. Achilles fell to his knees and kept his gaze on his cousin, "You have returned once again? For how long this time?"
Patroclus reached out but hesitated, "I am sorry you are angry with me, Achilles."
The fist of the golden man pounded once into the chest of a bloodied and sand-covered Hector, "I have done this for you! I killed this man in your name. I desecrated his body so all would know. I am giving him back for your peace! Do not think I am angry with you. I am angry with everyone but you. The gods, Agamemnon, Briseis, Eudorus, my mother, Hector, ev-"
"Including yourself."
Achilles silences as he saw Patroclus youth return to him once more with concern etched in every corner of that young face. He continued as he kneeled down to meet Achilles eye for eye, "I cannot be the reason you die a little more with every sunrise and sunset. You are making a murderer of me, Achilles."
Achilles reached across the body to grab Patroclus' neck lovingly, but the boy shrugged away before any contact could be made. His voice was strong, but Patroclus could hear the pain lingering there, "I told you. You were my last remaining shred of humanity."
Patroclus shook his head, "Someone cannot be your humanity, but instead they can teach it to you. If that is what I did, then remember that lesson, Achilles."
Achilles narrowed his eyes at the young man, "I am supposed to be your master and king, not you mine."
Patroclus narrowed his eyes right back at him, "I am supposed to be a child in your eyes? Then why would you want me to see you do this?"
Achilles followed Patroclus' gaze as well as the ghost's trembling finger. For the first time he saw what he had done through that boy's eyes. He saw what he committed in his good name.
So many times he had said that Patroclus was the last truly good thing in this world and yet he commited such a hideous crime in that good's name.
For the first time Achilles made himself sick, "I am sorry, Patroclus." but the words were said to an empty night. Once again the boy was gone.
Moments passed as Achilles kneeled before the body of his fallen foe. He had done this. How low he had fallen. The worst part was everyone saw the evil of it, everyone saw it and they tried to save him, but still Achilles cared not. It took the one person in this he could truly live for to make him realize what a monster he had become.
Achilles tried to cover up the corpse, but as he did so his eyes grew hot and heavy. They felt as though someone was squeezing them of their very juices.
More tears.
Achilles grew tired of this show of emotion. He wanted it to end. Everything to come to an end. He was sorry for what he had done to Hector. He had sought his vengeance and that should have been that, but instead he turned into a creature more vile than Agamemnon himself. What was this monster he had become? His soul cried for forgiveness to Hector's as his tears washed the man's body. He deserved better.
Hector had given that much to Patroclus.
Once the tears had passed, Achilles finished wrapping Hector's body as he breathed the silent prayer, "We'll meet again soon, my brother."
With all those tidings and evils shed out it was time to make everything right for the sake of his soul. That was what Patroclus wanted of him. The boy had wanted him to walk in the light even without him there by his side. This would be harder than any fight Achilles had encountered.
He met up with Priam and the corpse strapped to a chariot ready to exit. As he met the met look for look he found the proper words escaped him. Finally he took a breath and admitted shamefully, "You're son was the best that I fought. In my country the funeral lasts for twelve days."
Gratitude shown in the enemy king's eyes, "It is the same in my country."
Achilles nodded to him as the banter seemed light volumes passed between them and they both knew it, "Then the prince will have that honor. No Greek will attack Troy for twelve days."
Silent gratitude beyond words quivered the proud king's lips as Briseis ran towards them. Achilles let out a breath as he knew one more loose end he had to right.
He looked on with a weight lifting off his shoulders just as Atlas must feel as the two greeted each other with tears and relief.
It was time to make matters right with Briseis. For a shining moment he had thought he had loved the girl, but when matters grew dark the truth was slapped back in his face. He had trifled with her heart and he did not know if he could ever make her understand, but it was time.
He had to try.
It was time to do something now that he should have done before it was too late for Patroclus.
As she approached him, Achilles went through all he should say, but decided on a need to speak basis. No need to muddle anything with useless, pretty words.
It was simple as, "You're free. If I hurt you…" the rest of that sentence died off as he struggled for the right thing to say. She had to know she wasn't what he wanted that, "…it wasn't what I wanted…"
When more of the proper words escaped him, he decided on something as right as giving her the necklace. Did she know it was the same necklace his mother gave him? Did she know that it reminded him of home? Or did she know that home was everything he loved about Patroclus?
That necklace was everything he loved about his memories of home and Patroclus. Since she lost to the memory of him, it only seemed justified she leave now with that necklace.
Her hand covered his and wordlessly the message passed between them. Briseis understood.
It was over.
More words passed as he watched the king and his niece ride off into the night and Achilles was not sorry. He had done what was right and he knew he had relearned the lesson that Patroclus had taught him. His heart was still dead, but his mind could still grant humanity. He was still stone inside, but this way he was a statue with mercy.
~*~*Eleven Days Later*~*~
Odysseus sat across from Achilles before the fire as the rest of the men left them alone to sleep for the night. The world seemed peaceful. It was hard to believe tomorrow there would be bloodshed beyond compare.
It was a brilliant, yet cowardly, plan Achilles had to admit. When Odysseus cleared his throat, Achilles continued to stare at the flames. Eventually he ignored Achilles' not too subtle hints and said, "I have yet to figure out why you stay."
Achilles shrugged and was not going to say a word, but decided to open up to a man who had proved to want nothing more than friendship. He looked up at him and said, "It was something Patroclus said to me before he died. He said 'soldiers obey' as if the world was as simple as that foolish notion."
Odysseus smiled, but did not laugh, "Isn't it? I may not agree with Agamemnon, but he is still king."
Achilles shook his head, "I did not come here for Agamemnon. I came here because of you. You were one of very few I respect enough to call friend. So in this I follow you. I made a promise coming here to Troy with you. While I will not endanger my men for a fool king's bloody cause, I will take up my sword and obey you as a soldier should."
Now Odysseus laughed as he moved to clap Achilles' back, "Good to see even the invincible Achilles can learn something now and then."
Silence descended upon them again as Odysseus looked about. His voice became low and conspiring, "Achilles, this battle tomorrow is going to be a bloodshed. Agamemnon will burn down all of Troy before he is complete."
Achilles nodded at the obvious, "Of course, is war any other way."
Odysseus became even quieter, "What of your Briseis? I will look the other way if you need to find her. No one will think twice over your absence."
Achilles shook his head, "She is not my Briseis. Let the girl escape with the rest of that family."
Odysseus quirked an eyebrow, "Did she really mean so little to you to be cast to the wolves so easy? Agamemnon will go after her as soon as he has Priam's head. Will you leave her to that fate? To Priam?"
While he did not love the girl, Achilles knew he could not so easily hand her over to the will of Priam's definition of mercy either.
~*~*Next Night, Night of the Siege Upon Troy*~*~
The giant Trojan Horse quietly fell away as men sprung forth from it as Athena from Zeus. Achilles was like a demon as he searched the burning city for Briseis. Screams from women and children drowned out his voice as he yelled her name. There was never a reply.
Finally he found on the rooftops of the city. There she stood with Agamemnon harassing her. He was almost too late. As he ran to her aid, the brave girl stabbed Agamemnon in his throat only to captured by more soldiers.
He didn't know whether to congratulate or chastise her. She had to have known that would never buy herself some freedom. Alas Achilles stepped in and slew both her opponents just as he was about to help her to her feet a sharp pain tore threw his ankle and stole his very breath away.
His eyes grew wide and he hardly heard he scream as he rose to charge at that insipid boy prince. He barely took another step before another arrow pierced just below his rib cage.
It was the first time another dared to draw blood from him in such a way. His mother's words ran threw his mind and Achilles refused to let it end here by that man. He ripped out the arrow and continued charging Paris. Briseis ran ahead of him towards her cousin, but her words were lost as Achilles took three more arrows to the chest.
The world tilted under his feet as Achilles fought to stand. A light grew in the dark as Achilles eyes grew large. Through the blinding light Patroclus came. He walked from behind Paris and moved to stand just behind Briseis.
This was the end.
Pain choked at Achilles, but still a warmth grew in his heart as Patroclus' bittersweet smile approached him. If this was the end then it was beautiful. He fell to his knees before Patroclus and continued to pant through the pain.
So this was death.
The greatest foe he had eluded all these years was ransacking his body, but Achilles cared not. He would not die alone. Patroclus was here. He was by his side.
The sounds of Briseis crying and the city screaming was a mere mumble as the two men locked eyes.
Patroclus kneeled before him and whispered, "Take the arrow out."
Achilles stared down at the wound and broke it off. He shuddered from the pain. He saw Briseis running towards them, but he did not want her to break up this beautiful death. He wanted Patroclus' face to be the last. Not her.
But just as she kneeled into Patroclus, it seemed her body took on his spirit. It was still Patroclus kneeling before him, but this time he was solid. Achilles knew for the first time he could reach out and touch him.
Paris would see him touching Briseis and Briseis would think it was all intended for her, but they would know. Patroclus and Achilles would know the truth of it.
His hands shook as they held that face. They could not believe how good it felt. Illusion or no, it was still paradise to die touching him one last time.
A smile crossed Achilles face as tears pooled in Patroclus' eyes. The boy's face was contorted as he whimpered, "I cannot feel it Achilles. It is her body, not mine. I cannot feel and yet I do not want you to let go. Do not die. Fight, cousin! I cannot see you this way."
Achilles smile was fainter, but his heart skipped with every touch. It was nice to see him, to touch him, one last time. Achilles would go to Tartarus and Patroclus onto the Elysian Fields. Forever apart for eternity, but this moment was worth it. To die touching him one last time, this was the gods granting him a little peace. His voice was faint and sweet, "Its all right, its all right."
An unabashed tear streaked down Patroclus' face as he muttered, "I want to help you, Achilles."
Achilles fell forward and grabbed some of those straight brown locks of Patroclus. His nose breathed in the scent, but his nose only smelled her. His mind reminded though. His mind ignored what his nose smelled and let memory take control. His memory pushed aside reason and let Patroclus' scent be the one he truly smelled.
He lay his head on his head and sighed a contented sigh. This moment, it was this final moment that would carry him through his dark days on the River Styx. They could punish him for all eternity, but he would relive dying in Patroclus' arms for all of it.
The boy held back his tears as he longed to feel Achilles. It was not fair! Patroclus knew Briseis was feeling every last bit of this, but he wanted it. He wanted to feel Achilles arm, to feel his touch, but he was lucky they were granted this last passage.
Watching die was a pain Patroclus had not intended. If was not already dead, he was sure this would be the end of him. His voice broke as he struggled to speak, "I have given you nothing to what you have given me."
"You gave me peace in a lifetime of war."
Those faithful words touched Patroclus to his core. To know he gave something back to the man he admired, cherished, and loved more than any his lifetime was a gift Patroclus would take with him wherever he ended up in the afterlife.
Both their hands clung to the others face as they never let go. Patroclus whispered into the night for only Achilles ears, "I knew it would kill me to watch you die, but I never imagined this."
Achilles stared deep into those eyes and saw everything he had felt. The grief, the torture, the torment, the guilt; the only difference was…was that Patroclus was having to watch him die.
That was a nightmare Achilles never had to endure. He knew what he had to do. As much as he wanted his spirit there while he died, Achilles knew the boy deserved his peace. He had already done so much, even in death. His words were filled with emotions he could not muster himself to say. One simple word filled with love and sacrifice, "Go."
He placed one last kiss to Patroclus lips. The taste that filled his mouth was sweet and feminine. The scent was that of flowers, fabric, and pampering. The taste was salty and masculine. The scent lacked that intoxicating odor of the open air, sandalwood, and innocence.
All his senses told him it was Briseis he caressed and it was Briseis he spoke sweet words too. But his eyes, his hands, his memories, and his soul would only let him see the spirit of Patroclus kneeling before him.
It was the lad's despairing eyes and desperate words of, "I will not let you die alone."
He smiled painstakingly to that distressed face, "You must…"
Patroclus' face grew indignant and stubborn as his will steeled, "No! If the Trojans capture your body-"
"Troy has fallen. Go."
Patroclus shook his head with his lip quivering showing him to be so young once more, "You do not leave the one you love most of all to die on his own."
Stared at those tempting lips and pleading eyes of Patroclus, "Its all right. Go."
If only the boy knew how much he hated him having to see him this way. He was supposed to be his hero and yet here he kneeled the fallen Achilles…dying…
Once more, Patroclus stammered, "But, Achilles-"
His last plea was soft and spoke volumes, "Go."
The fight faded from Patroclus as he nodded and kissed Achilles forehead. When the lad stood he left the sight of Briseis crying before Achilles. The shock and emptiness almost took Achilles right there.
It was clear the woman thought that whole charade was for her. If only she knew. If only she knew the apparation she once saw had spoken the sweet final words to him instead of she.
It was Patroclus he kissed, not her.
Oh well, she was fleeing as it was anyhow. He was only finally in that rooftop courtyard. A solitary tear rolled down his cheek as he could finally die without his poor Patroclus to having to watch.
Blackness closed in around him and a final thought rolled through his aching mind, Thank you for granting him into my final moments.
With that the great Achilles let himself sink into the abyss. Be it Tartarus or the Elysian Fields…
To be continued…