Chapter Five – When You Go, You're Gone Forever

It was yet another dull, gray day, drizzly and wet, but never really raining. These were his least favorite kinds of days, when it came down to it, and it felt like this is all they've been getting lately. At least they reflected the rest of his life, though. Maybe that was the silver lining.

"Nathan, have you practiced at all in the last few days?" Dan asked, rudely barging into his room without knocking. "You don't want to get soft."

"Do you ever think about anything else?" Nathan asked snidely, not even bothering to look up from the drawer he's rifling through. "Don't you have a campaign opponent to smear today or a photo op to pose for?"

"Shockingly, I'm free of such dreary obligations," Dan smiled, waiting in the doorway for Nathan to look up. "Thought maybe we could hit the gym before I head over to the dealership for the day."

"Well, you thought wrong," he declined, rolling his eyes. "What's with you spending so much time there on the weekends and the evenings anyway?"

"Oh, campaign stuff," Dan evaded, although there was temptation to get his son's attention by telling him the truth – that Haley was there, and that he felt an obligation to show up and keep their charade going by lording over her while she worked.

"Yeah, right. Better get to it, then," Nathan told him, shaking his head. "Hate for you not pull the wool over enough people's eyes to win."

"What is your problem, Nate?" Dan asked through clenched teeth, trying his damnedest to keep control now when he knew it counted the most.

"What do you think it is?" Nathan scoffed, finally looking up at him, something akin to disbelief in his eyes. "God, are you mental? You spend the better part of my life screwing with my head, trying to turn me into you, and you have the nerve to wonder why I might have a problem with you?"

"I've only tried to make you see how hard you have to work to be the best. You do want to be the best, don't you?"

"I don't know, Dad!" Nathan exclaimed. "It's not like you've ever given me an opportunity to be anything else, right?"

"You think I like being the bad guy?"

"Yeah, why not? I mean, you are so good at it, after all," Nathan sighed, turning his back on his father again.

"I'm trying here," Dan muttered in a pained voice. "I'm trying to talk to you, and all you can do is turn your back on me?"

"Why do you think you deserve better than that?"

"I'm your father! I raised you, I've put a roof over your head, taken care of you when you were sick, got you everything you needed and wanted!"

"Yeah, well, maybe if you'd hugged me more," Nathan snarked at him, shaking his head. At this point, he just wanted Dan to leave the room; to leave him alone. "Why don't you go play papa bear to Lucas, Dad? Maybe he'd appreciate it."

"This isn't a competition between you and your brother," Dan sighed. "I'm not doing this because things have gotten bad between me and him. You're both my sons, and I want relationships with both of you."

"Did you read that off a greeting card?" Nathan asked, looking up at him.

"Jesus, Nate, do you have to be so flippant about this? I'm trying to talk to you, and you can't even be serious!" Dan yelled, slamming his fist into the wall. "If this is because of that girl, I'll – "

"You'll what?" Nathan laughed. "There is nothing you can do, and we both know that. It's killing you, though, isn't it? Not being able to control, not being able to stand over me, Mom, Luke, Haley and play puppet master, isn't it? That's your favorite hobby. You and I both know that."

"You don't know anything," Dan said tiredly, rubbing the tips of his fingers over his suddenly aching temples. "Look, Nathan, is it so shocking that I'd come in here just to see you? To talk to you?"

Nathan stared at him, shock coloring his expression until he slowly shook his head. "Yeah, it's about the hardest thing you could ask me to believe. Fuck, Dad," he sneered, "If you'd told me that there were purple cows flying outside the window now, I'd be more inclined to believe that."

"Nathan!" Dan snapped. "This is my house, and you can show some damn respect while you're in it!"

"I'm old enough to know that respect isn't given freely, it's something people earn. So don't throw that at me."

"I'm your father, without me, you'd be nothing! You wouldn't exist, Nathan!"

"That doesn't give you carte blanche respect, Dad! You undermine everything in my life – me, Mom, Haley, Lucas, my relationships with all of them. It's like my life is your personal playground to come in and mess around with. Like we're dolls or something that you can move around and pose to suit your mood," Nathan bit out. "But it doesn't work that way. I don't work that way. Life doesn't work that way."

"What do you know about life? You're just a kid, Nathan. And I'm your father, and I want us to be able to talk."

"Yeah, I think we passed that point a long time ago, Dad."

"Nathan, I want us to get our relationship back on track; I want us to be like we used to be."

"We don't have a relationship," Nathan said plainly, looking him in the eye. "You trying to dictate my life isn't a relationship. Me blindly following your orders, again, not a relationship. You yelling at me or Mom for ever questioning you, again, not a relationship."

"You're saying 'no', not even going to give me a chance on this? A chance to make it up to you and Lucas?"

"Oh, to Luke now, too? Wow, that one is really rich, Dad. And hey, if you think I'm disinterested, wait till you talk to him!" Nathan grinned sardonically, almost relishing the idea of Luke putting their father back in his place. And who could blame him, if Dan worked up the nerve to go to him with this crap.

"Okay," Dan sighed, knowing he was not going to get anywhere with Nathan now. "We'll talk about this again later. Look, I know you don't trust me, and you have reason not to, but just know that this time, it's different."

He didn't wait for Nathan to respond one way or the other, just turned on his heels and left, jogging down the stairs. To his irritation, Deb was in the foyer, hands on her hips, glaring at him.

"What now, Deb?" he asked, no bite behind the words.

"I just wanted to let you know that I won't be able to make it to the dinner tonight," she said with a smirk. "I've got better things to do than play trophy wife at a party celebrating your pathetic mayoral aspirations."

"Not that you're that great of a prize," he muttered under his breath, smiling silkily at her before saying, in a louder voice. "That's fine, Deb. In fact, maybe we should go ahead with the divorce now, after all."

"Excuse me?" she sputtered, eyeing him skeptically. "Did you buy something from that taco stand at the gas station? I told you after the last time, those aren't good for you, Dan."

"Knock it off, Deb," he sighed, suddenly unsure of himself. It seemed like such a good idea two sentences ago, but now he didn't know what the hell he was thinking. "This – this sham is taking its toll on all of us. Maybe we should just end it now."

"End it," she repeated, dumbfounded. "Just…just like that, you want to end it? After everything, after blackmailing me to stick with you for this? Now you want to end it? Forgive me for thinking of you as a manipulative liar, Dan, but I'm having a hard time understanding this alleged change of heart."

"I'm sure your difficulty grasping concepts is due to the self-tanner and hair dye seeping into your bloodstream through your skin, but that's sort of irrelevant right now," he told her. "The point is, I don't want to be married to you anymore." The words were coming out of his mouth, and he recognized that they were true, but he was not sure when they became true. A part of him had thought that holding onto Deb was necessary, that maybe they did belong together.

He just couldn't force himself to think like that anymore. He was miserable, Deb was clearly miserable, and Nathan hated him and resented Deb. It just didn't seem worth it to him anymore. Holding on wasn't doing any of them any good, and when he was honest with himself, he knew that not only was this not what Deb wanted, but it wasn't what he wanted, either.

"Get the papers. I'll sign them."

Shaking herself out of her shock, she practically dashed for the kitchen to get the papers out of the utility drawer. She was back before he could even blink, he noted with a curious mix of irritation and amusement. "There, there they are. Sign them, Dan."

Nodding grimly, he took the pen, signing his name with a flourish on the flagged pages. "Well, I guess I won't be seeing you much now," he noted, surprised at the tightening of his throat. "I'll have movers come to pack up my things. The only thing is, if Nathan refuses to come to the beach house, I'm coming here to visit him. I will repair my relationships with my sons, Deb."

She stared blankly at the signature on the last page before looking up at him. "You didn't even read over the terms, Dan."

"I did when you first sent them," he countered. "I know what's in them, Deb; you get this house, your car, your bank account, and I get mine. It's fine, it doesn't really matter."

"Why?" she asked, the lone word reverberating in the empty foyer.

"Why what? Why now?" he asked, nodding when she shrugged noncommittally. "I don't know. I want to fix things with Nathan, and it will never happen here, not like this. Not with things the way they are between us. And unfortunately, you and I are beyond fixing."

"Yes, we are," she agreed quietly, a bittersweet smile gracing her lips, and he couldn't help but think of better times. "That's surprisingly mature of you, Dan. This is really about Nathan?"

"In a way," he confirmed. "Both of my kids hate me. It shouldn't be like that; I don't want it to be like that."

"Quite the epiphany," she remarked dryly. "Were you in some sort of accident that altered your mental status?"

"Be serious, Deb," he bit back with more heat than either of them have employed since he said he'd sign the papers.

"I'm sorry," she apologized, sighing. "This is just really unexpected. All of it. And well, old habits die hard, don't they?"

"Me wanting to have decent relationships with my sons is unexpected?" Dan questioned. "I might not always go about things in the best way, but it should be obvious how important they are to me."

"Nathan, maybe," Deb conceded. "In your warped ways, I suppose you have demonstrated a need for him to have and be the best. Lucas is another story."

"Well, that's what I'm trying to fix now."

She stared hard at him, as if trying to gauge his sincerity. "Well, then," she nodded as he turns to leave. "Good luck, Dan. I – I don't know what to say."

Turning back to her, he smiled slightly, without malice or mocking for the first time in a long while, she noted. "Eighteen years," he sighed. "That's a long time. For what it's worth, I'm sorry for my mistakes."

"And I'm sorry for mine," she whispered as he walked out the door, shutting it firmly behind him.

Unnoticed by either of them, Nathan stood at the top of the stairs, looking down at them, watching their goodbye. He was too surprised to move; this was the last thing he ever expected to see from either of his parents. He watched his father walk out of the door, and he watched his mother sigh before turning and walking into the kitchen where he could hear her begin to talk on the phone.

This was what he's wanted, for both himself and his mother. This was a good thing, he tried to assure himself. So why did it feel so weird?

By Monday morning, the new schedule of starting work at the crack of dawn on the weekends had caught up and was taking its toll as she fought sleep during her first period math class. Luckily, she shared the class with Luke, and he was there with a 'friendly' elbow whenever he noticed her dozing off.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked as they walk out of class. "What does that new job have you doing, running marathons?"

"I'm fine," she muttered around a yawn, not wanting to get into the job thing again. "Just adjusting to a new schedule, that's all."

Looping an arm over her shoulders, he pulled her down the hall. "Well, come on, Sleeping Beauty, you'd better wake up before English. You know Mrs. Edson."

"Yeah, yeah," Haley sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder. "So, what's going on with you?"

"Just school, Hales," he shrugged, releasing her with a playful shove. "Why do you ask?"

Sighing, she pasted a smile on her face. "Because you're my friend. Because I like knowing what's going on with you. Because you've been really weird in a false happy kind of way like maybe you're hiding something."

Staring at her for a minute, he shook his head. "How do you do that?" he complained. "I thought I was projecting 'everything is fine' pretty well. Mom didn't question me."

"Oh, I'm just wise like that, Luke-san, you'd do well to remember," she teased. "Come on, tell me before class starts."

"You're killing me here, master," he rolled his eyes. "Look, this isn't something we can get into now, but I – I'll tell you at lunch. I promise," he assured her when she started glaring. "Haley, I will."

"Okay, you better. I'm holding you to that, and if you try and weasel out, I'll make you miserable like you wouldn't believe," she threatened, giving him a one armed hug before turning and ducking into her classroom.

"Great," he called half-heartedly as she hurried away. She turned and watched him go, crossing her fingers that what he had to tell her was that Dan approached him about paying for his healthcare. Of course, it could be that Dan showed up and picked a fight or something, but she was really hoping for the former.

Time passed slowly until lunch, and she hurriedly shoved her things into her locker, waiting there impatiently for Luke. For the first time ever, she's convinced it was unfortunate that Nathan found her first. She was glad to see him, and she was even happier to see the big smile on his face, reserved solely for her, but right now, she needed to talk to Luke.

"Hey!" she greeted him, a giddy feeling spreading through her as his smile widened in response. "What's going on, Nathan?"

Pulling her into a hug, he didn't say anything at first. When he released her, she stared up at him in surprise. "My dad signed the divorce papers."

"What?" Haley gasped in shock. "Are you kidding me?"

"Nope, not even a little," he continued to grin. "I tried calling you yesterday, but Brooke said you were at work. She also, er, said you hadn't stayed there since Thursday night."

"Oh, yeah, that, Karen insisted I stay with them," Haley explained hurriedly. "Oh, my gosh, I can't believe that Dan Scott signed divorce papers. Willingly? Really?"

"Yeah, really," he laughed. "His stuff is being moved out today, my mom said. He's staying at the beach house. I – I won't have to see him anymore."

"Oh, Nathan – this is so good. For you and your mom, this is really good. I'm happy for you!"

"Thanks, Hales. This is a good thing, especially for my mom."

"How's she doing with all of this?" Haley asked quietly. "She must've been surprised when he agreed, huh?"

"She's relieved, of course," he sighed. "But I do think on some level, she's hurt he agreed to it."

"Maybe she's just more upset that they couldn't work it out," she suggested gently. "I mean, they were married for what, eighteen years? That's a long time, Nathan."

"Yeah," he sighed. "Yeah, I know. It's just, after all the crap he's pulled, and hey, even all the crap that she's pulled, don't you think that it'd be strictly relief?"

"I don't know, Nathan," she shrugged. "Just don't be too hard on her if she doesn't conform to what you expect her to do with all this."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, a defensive edge creeping into his voice.

"It's just a suggestion," she sighed, trying to smile a little for his sake. "Let her grieve for her marriage, even if said marriage really wasn't a good thing."

"Do – do you grieve for us?"

"No!" she exclaimed loudly without thinking. "God, if I gave in and did that, don't you know that would mean I had no more hope? And I have so much hope for us, Nathan!"

He opened his mouth to reply, but snapped it shut with an audible 'click' when Lucas sidled up alongside them. "Uh, hey," Luke offered tentatively. "We can meet after practice if you want, Hales."

Sighing she shook her head. "Can't, work. Look, give me a minute and I'll meet you outside, okay?" He nodded and took off, casting one worried look over his shoulder at the two before going. Looking back up at Nathan, she smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry, Nathan, but I promised him I'd talk. I think something is going on with him, and I'm worried."

"Yeah, fine," Nathan sighed, not bothering to hide his irritation with it. "Go ahead and go see Luke instead of your husband. That's…that's really great, Hales."

"Nathan, I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed. "You know how it is! Look, I work until nine, but maybe after that I could come over and we could study together?"

Shaking his head, he smirked at her. "What's that? A pity study? No thanks."

"Of course it's nothing like that! I want to be with you, Nathan, as much as possible," she whispered urgently. "I want to be with you now, even, but he's my friend, and I have plans. And if we're going to regress to the point where either of you try and make me 'choose', I won't be happy. And I won't play those games."

She turned to go find Luke as promised, but he grabbed her arm, stopping. "You're right," he admitted. "I'm sorry. I'm being a jerk. Nothing new there, right?"

"Don't worry about it, Nathan, no big deal," she smiled dismissively. "I know you have a lot on your mind right now."

"Yeah," he sighed. "Call me when you're finished working, I can pick you up and we can go out. I promise I'll do all my homework before that, just like a good little boy."

She laughed at that, laying a hand on his arm. "Let's meet for pizza. My treat."

"Yeah, okay," he agreed, smiling down at her. "I'd like that, Hales."

"Me, too," she smiled, squeezing his arm before turning to go. "I'll see you a little after ten, then?"

"Definitely," he called after her, smirking at the giddy little skip she did as she disappeared around the corner. Allowing himself a small smile, he murmured, "At least I get the nights."

"He actually said that?" Haley gaped, her sandwich falling out of her limp grasp. "Dan. Dan Scott. He said that?"

"Yeah," Luke insisted, smiling a little at her disbelief, "Said he wanted to repair our relationship, and he wanted to start by paying for my doctors and meds. Can you believe that bastard thinks he can buy me?"

"That is so great, Luke!" she enthused, her face falling when the rest of his statement caught up with her mouth. "Wait. You said 'no', didn't you?"

"What else would I say?" he asked, eyeing her.

"Luuuuke!" she drawled out in a whine, her head crashing down to rest on the table briefly. Lifting it up to look at him, she fixed him a glare. "You aren't that stupid, are you?"

"Haley, I don't know how to say this," he said with mock gravity, "But I'm beginning to think maybe it's your IQ we should be worrying about." At her glare, he threw his hands up in surrender. "Fine, sorry. But come on, it's Dan. My father, the guy who never cared about me anymore than to ignore me most of my life, and completely mock and denigrate me the rest of it."

"Yeah, and guess what?" she snapped peevishly. "I don't care about that, Luke! I really don't. What I care about is you, and you need what he's offering!"

Shaking his head, he glared at her in denial. "No. No, I'm not taking anything from him. It would come at a price, and while I don't know what that price is, I'm not willing to do that again."

"Did he ask for anything? Did he make demands, tell you that these things would come in exchange for something, blackmail you?" Taking his silence for confirmation that Dan didn't do any of those things, she sighed. "Luke, I know you don't want his help, I know that. And I get it, too, believe me. The thing is, this is more important than that."

"I'm doing fine," he muttered, avoiding her gaze. "Everything is fine."

"God, you don't even get it at all, do you?"

"Get what? That you're inexplicably trying to force me into something with Dan? Into taking something from him? Hales, he's the boogeyman your dad always used to warn us about. He's the evil monster that hides under the bed!" he exclaimed. "Only an idiot or a newborn baby would be ignorant enough to enter into an alliance with him."

She cringed at that, the remark hitting way too close to home. "I know you don't want to do this, and I really don't blame you. It's just, Luke, your life is more important than avoiding Dan." At his skeptical look, she plowed on. "It is! God, what is wrong with you? Would you rather that you have to keep stealing cash from the register at your mom's restaurant to pay for your meds? Would you rather die because you can't afford to see a doctor? That is so stupid!"

"Hey, I'm not going to – "

"You don't know that!" she yelled, attracting the stares of other students sitting outside. "You don't know that, you can't know that!"

"Hales, shut up," he whispered urgently. "Come on, I don't want everyone knowing my business."

"Maybe they should," she sighed, calming down a little. "I'm just worried about you, I'm really freaking worried about you, and from what I can tell, you don't even care."

"I care, of course I care! It's just, what can I do about it? I'm not taking Dan's charity, no matter how many times he promises there are no strings attached."

"Luke, think about it. Please, just look at this logically. Is having dinner with Dan once a week really such a high price to pay for living a healthy life? Not from where I'm standing, it sure isn't," she pleaded, tears prickling at her eyes. "Please don't brush this offer off."

"I can't put myself in that position," he groaned, his head dropping to rest on his arms. "It's too hard. I tried, last year while you were gone. I did, Hales, I thought maybe he and I could have something, some kind of relationship."

Reaching out and grabbing his hands, she clutched them tightly. "Luke. Don't do it for him, do it for yourself. Do it for me, for Keith. Luke, do it for your mom!"

"Don't bring her into this," he ordered gruffly, still not looking up at her. "Come on, Hales, don't do this to me. Don't pull out the big guns."

"I'm sorry," she lied, not sorry at all if this helps him, but the guilt was still creeping in the edges. "But I have to. If you won't tell her the truth about this, and let her help you, then I refuse to stand idly by and not force you to help yourself."

"You don't know what you're asking," he muttered, finally raising his head. "You have no idea what this would cost me."

She wanted to argue that she did, that she knew exactly what Dan could take from a person, but she kept her mouth shut on that. "Maybe it doesn't matter. No, not maybe, it doesn't matter, Luke. You have to take care of yourself, and it sounds to me that Dan is offering that to you. You can't turn that down."

"There has to be another way," he insisted, but she thought it was more to himself than her at this point. "There must be."

"What? What is it? Because you and I both know that the way you're going now, it isn't smart. You aren't getting the care you need, and that's not okay," she reasoned.

"I know," he admitted, looking down at the table. "I just don't want…it shouldn't be this way. It shouldn't be so hard to even accept something this basic from him, Hales. How can he make me feel this way?"

"Don't let him," she hissed angrily. "Don't you dare let him make you feel anything. Just take what he's offering, and if he wants a dinner or two, then do it. That's worth it, Luke, it really is. I promise you, it's worth it."

"I know," Luke sighed. "I know that. Maybe that's why it sucks so bad, because I know that it is what I have to do, and I just hate that he's the one who can do it for me."

She bit her tongue, driving away the temptation to insist that if he'd just told his mother, then maybe Dan wouldn't be his only option. Given his state of mind, she'd really hate to see his reaction if she brought that up.

"That means you'll accept, right?" she prodded gently. "I'm sorry that this is what it has come down to for you, but Luke…you have to do it. If you don't, then I have to tell your mom. It's bad enough that she doesn't know, that I have to lie to her every time I see her, but if you aren't getting the proper care, then she has to know."

He shook his head, his face clouding over in anger and panic and fear. "You don't have to tell her. I – I'll talk to Dan tonight, I guess." Shaking his head, he sighed. "Said he'd stop by to watch practice. Gee, it's almost like he cares."

She couldn't argue with that because no matter what Dan said and what she thought she saw on his face sometimes, what he'd done to both Nathan and Luke showed that maybe he really didn't care. Actions still spoke louder than words. "Don't let that matter, Luke."

"How can it not matter?" Luke asked rhetorically. "He's already there, like on my shoulder or something. When I do something well, I can see him ignoring me or belittling it. When I mess up, it's like he's there, mocking me for it. He's this ghost that is always with me, and now he's getting in here and taking on a corporeal form. I don't know if I can deal with that."

"Well, you don't have to deal with it alone," she assured him. "I'll help in any way I can. You know that."

"You don't have to," he sighed. "You deal with Dan enough, I'm sure you don't want to hear about him from me."

"Oh, come on, I think that puts me in the perfect position to enjoy a little Dan-bashing or Dan-gossip," she laughed before turning serious. "You know, Nathan would appreciate it, too. Maybe you should tell him, or let me tell him."

"No. No way," Luke said flatly. "I don't want him feeling sorry for me, Haley. Sorry, but no. He hates me now, and that's fine. At least he's making the decision without feeling emotionally blackmailed by some stupid heart condition."

"It wouldn't be like that, and you know it," she countered. "I really don't get either of you. After all the progress you both made, you let the person both of you distrust the most tear you apart. So stupid, Luke. Really stupid."

"Thanks, because I didn't get the irony," he muttered, glaring at her until she laughed. "And now it's a joke."

"Oh, lighten up," Haley scolded him lightly. "Now come on, how are things with Brooke?"

"Hell on earth," he frowned. "Maybe I'm wrong to try and pursue something with her."

"She's, er, seemed not pleased with you the last few times I've seen her," Haley admitted, looking away. "What did you do – wait, let me rephrase: what does she perceive you to have done now?"

"Oh, it's my fault Peyton still has feelings for me, and it's my fault that Brooke can't deal with that and it is ruining their friendship. What the hell am I supposed to do about it, right?" he sighed. "I can't control Peyton's feelings, and I can't make Brooke accept it, either."

Haley stifled a giggle at that, looking down as she tapped her nails on her pop can. "Don't worry, I wouldn't ever try and give you relationship advice, which is good considering what a mess I've made of my own, but maybe the two of you are just not in the same place."

"Obviously," he snorted. "The thing is, I'm beginning to think we never will be."

"You don't know that," Haley tried, not sure what else to say to him. "Maybe things will get better. Brooke will come around, she always does."

"I'm beginning to think it doesn't matter," Luke half-smiled. "I just don't think that it's worth it, for either of us."

Haley sighed, taking in his forlorn expression. "Love is a bitch, Luke. But fighting for it isn't a bad thing, just a hard thing."

"Maybe it isn't love, though," he decided. "If it were, things would be different. I'd feel different."

"If you don't feel it, that's one thing. But if you want to give up because you aren't getting your way, that, my friend, kind of sucks."

"It isn't about that," he assured her. "This is more, I don't know. There's so much going on with all of us right now, and if I'm dealing with Dan and doctors and you nagging me all the time, maybe Brooke doesn't fit in that equation."

"Hey, Luke, don't shut her out of your life. That's not fair to either of you, no matter the reason. At least be honest with her."

"I won't," he promised, smiling faintly. "But for now, I just have too much going on to fairly pursue a relationship with her. With anyone."

"Okay," Haley nodded, a little skeptical. Skeptical that he'd break it off with Brooke, skeptical that he'd really agree to take Dan's help. Nervous, above everything else.

"Are you going to eat that sandwich?" he asked, eyeing it hungrily.

"No, go ahead," she offered, rolling her eyes. "Not that you already inhaled your own or anything."

"I'm a growing boy," he insisted. "Have to keep my energy up for the growing process."

"Too bad your brain isn't growing, too," she sighed with mock gravity. "That really is a tragedy of epic proportions."

"Hey now!"

She laughed with him before turning serious again. "Luke? Thanks. I mean, for agreeing to accept Dan's help. I hate threatening you with telling your mom – almost as much as I hate that you won't tell her – but I'm just really worried about you."

"I know," he smiled, reaching out to pat her hand. "It's okay. Maybe not okay, but don't worry about it. We all do what we have to, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so," she sighed.

"Speaking of, how are things with Nathan?" he asked carefully, well aware that things with Nathan could be fine one day and crap the next. Volatile might be the perfect word to describe his half-brother. "Ah, Dan told me that he signed divorce papers. Why he thought I should know, I'm still not sure, but he told me."

"Nathan told me that just now. He's sort of mad that I ate lunch with you and not him."

"You could've gone and sat with him, Hales, I would've understood. It isn't like I haven't eaten lunch alone before," he reasoned.

"That wasn't it," she smileed. "You're my friend, and I'm not going to let either of you put me in the middle of whatever petty disagreements you're having this year. I don't care if it pisses one or both of you off, but that's the way it is."

"Fair enough," Luke laughed. "How was he taking the news?"

"Actually? I think he was pretty relieved. It's no secret that things in that house have been rough for a long time now, and knowing that the biggest source of conflict wouldn't be there with them was sort of a weight of his shoulders," she guessed. "It sounded like Deb was having a harder time than him, and that was the only thing about that bothered him."

"I'm glad he's okay with it," Luke admitted. "It's a tough situation. I remember when it became obvious that my mom and Keith would never work. They never even started, and it still hurt, you know? I can only imagine it would be a thousand times worse if they had been together all along, and then ended things."

"Well, with the tension in that house, and the way Dan picks at both of them, I can't imagine this being anything short of wonderful, you know?" she reasoned.

"Absolutely."

The bell rings, and they both groaned. Rolling her eyes, Haley laughed. "Well, I guess that's our cue to drop the heavy conversation, huh?"

"Must be," he nodded, gathering his things up. "See you sixth period."

"Yep, have fun!"

They part ways, Haley heading back towards her locker, pleasantly surprised to see Nathan waiting there for her. He smiled slightly at her as she approaches, taking her books from her as she starts working the lock.

"Hi," she greeted softly, reaching up to pick a piece of lint off his shirt, blushing when she realizes what she was doing. "God, I'm sorry. I feel like a monkey, picking ticks off of her mate. I saw this special on Animal Planet a few days ago about that very thing, and there I go, doing it. And I thought it was so weird at the time, like why would you do that, right? If your mate can't pick their own ticks, then maybe they shouldn't be your mate. But then, maybe they just didn't notice the tick, so they needed a hand, and – "

Her monologue was interrupted when he started laughing like crazy, leaning down to kiss her on the cheek before setting her things in her locker and turning to walk down the hall without even saying a word.

"Great, now I'm a freak that inspires hysterical laughing," she muttered to herself, her hand touching her cheek where his lips had. Looking up and catching the stares of a few classmates, she growled, "Oh, what are you looking at?"

Sure enough, Dan showed at practice that afternoon, setting Haley, Nathan, Luke and Whitey all on edge at the mere sight of him. Nathan was pissed because he figured Dan was there to harass him, Haley was uncomfortable with the thought that he might say something to her, Luke was not looking forward to talking with him after practice, and Whitey just hated him.

"Okay, that's a wrap, boys!" Whitey called out at about the same time Brooke was fighting with Rachel over who got to dismiss the cheerleaders. Haley rolled her eyes at Bevin as the squabbling pair walked out of the gym, still sniping at each other. She settled on the floor, ostensibly to stretch out, but more to stay and keep an eye on Dan, ready to intervene if he went after either son.

As she was sitting there, Nathan came over, plopping down beside her. "Hey," he smiled, receiving a big smile in return. "What do you think he's doing here? He hasn't even said a word beyond 'hi' to me."

She shrugged, glancing over towards Dan. "Maybe he's here to chew Whitey out about your playing time?"

"Yeah, maybe," Nathan laughed, watching as Whitey approached Dan, smirk firmly pasted on.

"It's like two male elk locking horns," Haley commented as they start to argue, getting right in each other's face.

"Animal Planet again?" Nathan asked, bemused.

"No, Discovery Channel," she blushed.

"So," he murmured, not really sure what else to say. A part of him was relieved he mentioned, in his own roundabout way, what happened in the hallway after lunch, but mostly he was just dreading her pressing him on the matter.

"So?" she smiled, sighing inwardly when she realized he wasn't going to say anything else. "Well, anyway, maybe he just came to watch. Despite everything, he does love the game."

"Yeah, he loves the game, when he thinks he can get some glory out of it. And since his only way of getting glory now would be from me, that would be why he's here," he sighed, frowning as Dan walked away from Whitey, taking a seat on the bleachers. "What's he doing?"

Haley opened her mouth to answer, snapping it shut when Luke walked out, warily approaching Dan, taking a seat next to him. "Um, I guess…he's talking to Luke?"

She hated that she was in this position where she knew more than everyone else, where she had effectively joined Dan in becoming some sort of creepy Machiavellian puppet master over her friends and family, but there wasn't anything she could do. But lying, to her husband, was about the worst thing she could imagine.

"That's – that's weird, right?" Nathan sputtered, confusion on his face as he watched the two talk. "I thought they weren't speaking at all these days, what the hell is that about? Why is Dad talking to him?"

"I don't know," Haley said quietly. "I'm sure it's no big deal, Nathan."

"How could it not be a big deal?" he countered. "They have nothing to talk about. They have no relationship. This doesn't even make sense."

"Luke is his son, too," she pointed out, again in a quiet voice. "Maybe both of them have trouble admitting that, but it is still there."

"I – well, yeah, fine."

"Nathan, what's wrong? Are you upset that Dan is here talking to Luke instead of you?" she asked. "Because I thought you'd be relieved about that. I know I would!"

He smiled at the last parting before sighing. "He's – I don't know, Hales. He's my father. He was always mine, even though he was almost always a controlling jerk."

"I don't think you have anything to be jealous of," Haley pointed out. "That looks about as comfortable as wearing sheet metal underwear."

"Now there's an image," he joked, focusing more of his attention on her. "Hey, about what happened, after lunch, I mean. I'm sorry I just ran off like that. It, I don't know, I surprised myself."

"It's okay," she absolved him immediately. "I kinda figured it was something like that."

"It was – nice. It was nice, Hales."

"Yeah, it was," she agreed, blushing. "Um, personally embarrassing, but you were nice. Even if you were laughing at me."

"And here I thought that I was laughing with you!" he countered, smirking. "Crap, I'd better go. I'm working tonight."

"Me, too," she sighed dramatically. "My new boss? A total drag. I don't think being late would endear me much."

He grinned at her as he held his hands out to pull her up off the floor. "Don't let him mess with you, or else I'll have to pay him a visit," he winked before jogging off to the locker room.

"Does he not say goodbye anymore?" she sighed, groaning when she saw Dan moving to intercept her. "Well, hi, Dan!" she greeted with her usual sarcastic cheer reserved just for him. "Your appearance here just really made the evening for everyone."

"Go get changed for work," he hissed. "I'm giving you a ride."

She let out a shocked bark of laugh at that, shaking her head. "No. No way, it's not far, I can walk there."

"Don't argue with me," he warned her. "I'll make a scene, and I'm pretty sure that's the last thing you want."

Looking around, she saw that both Nathan and Luke were watching, and she knew he was right. "Fine, but I'm not getting in a car with you until both of them are gone."

"Fair enough. I'll be in the car," Dan nodded, turning and striding toward the gym doors. She made a show of rolling her eyes for the boys' – her boys – benefit before heading into the locker room.

When she finished changing, after dallying an appropriate amount of time to make sure Luke and Nathan would both be gone, she headed out of the gym. The whole way to Dan's car, she wondered how she ever let her life get this crazy. Heck, how she practically went out of her way to ensure that nothing would ever be normal again. While she knew that she had achieved her objective, and that Lucas would be getting the medical attention he needed now, she would still be walking the tightrope created by her actions for a long time to come.

And that scared her.