He turned off the monitors but he couldn't move. He could still see the images. In the cool dark of the room. On the back of his eyelids as he leaned heavily into the counter. He felt frozen by the dread of what they meant.
He had no idea how long he stood there, in the dark, trying to make the images go away. Trying to will it all to just disappear, to never happen.
It was about as useful as praying to get rid of a demon in your leg.
There was a light knock on the door. Adam looked up to see Dena.
"Hey sorry to bother you." She said softly. "I just heard about Hunter."
He swallowed hard. He needed to tell her but the words wouldn't come. He tapped the monitor back on.
"Now is there anything you need me to do." She kept going, her voice a gentle tone typically reserved for the patients. He relied on her to be the bad ass in all things. This just made it harder.
"Should I sit down with Kara?"
He turned, still unable to speak. He looked up at the screens knowing she'd follow.
"Should I"
She stopped short as she saw it. Dena might only be a nurse but she was smart enough to be more, probably a far better doctor than he'd be. No it wasn't a lack of anything but desire that kept her where she was. She liked being able to be there to wipe the fevered faces, to sing the lullabies, even to tie a shoe if needed. It made them a perfect pair.
"Who?"
"It's Leo." He choked out softly.
"Oh no. Oh my god."
"I don't know how to tell him. He was supposed to go home today."
"I know."
"He was supposed to go home."
He closed his eyes, looking down. He was on the verge of completely breaking down. It wasn't Dena standing there that was stopping him. He knew she wouldn't care, wouldn't say a word. No it was just the simple fact that if he let himself start he wasn't sure he'd ever stop.
Adam felt a hand on his arm. "Okay then, take a deep breath."
Adam did.
"Now look at me."
When he opened his eyes, Dena was watching him.
"Let's go tell him together."