Author: Bloody Mary
{oOo}
Luther had faced many problems ever since he'd been sent back to Caliban. He had to assure the Space Marines that they were going to go back to the Crusade. One day. Hopefully. Only, of course the last part. He had to appease the Imperial administration and mediate in quarrels between them and the indigenous population, where both sides expected him to take their side.
He was quite certain those were all normal parts of local politics, even the occasional old-timer or disgruntled noble getting an audience with him only to grumble about the good old times, when a trip to a forest could end in the stomach of a beast.
What he did not think was normal was the fanmail. To his sister. Most of it was written by young women. He had just picked up a scented package that was addressed "Lady Alta" in pink lipstick and something happened—the paper tore—Luther let out a terrified howl—Zahariel dashed in—
Only to have a pair of lace panties land on his head. The Librarian picked them with two fingers and regarded them stoically, while Luther hyperventilated.
"They appear to have been worn," Zahariel observed clinically.
"I WANT ALL OF THIS BURNED!" Luther snapped, hysterically. "MY SISTER IS NOT GOING TO RECEIVE… THIS!"
He gestured at the offending garment, feeling curiously light-headed. His sister had fangirls. Lusty fangirls of the underwear-sending type.
He wanted to cry.
{oOo}