Ahh shit... I'm honored you guys… This humble little fic is 6 reviews away from reaching 100

I'm seriously about to cry

When I started this story I thought I would get 5 or 6 little reviews maybe... and I thought at least half of those would be telling me that I should just give up because I can't write

So since we all are so close I think we should do something...

Any ideas?

I have a soundtrack on my phone for this fic... maybe you guys would want to see it? Maybe I could write up a little blerp on why I listened to it?

That's kind of lame and unoriginal but anyways if you have any ideas for what I could write/do to honor this occasion tell me!

Now to the horrible backstory on why Robert Lightwood is (in my opinion) a douche bag

Happy Trails and Enjoy Readers & Reviewers

~L.C

_xxXxx_

The moment the door closed behind Magnus, my shoulders sagged. The drunk, happy feeling that came over me whenever he was around had flitted away like a bird at the first sign of snow. I was left in a broken heap on the bed, clinging to the smell of pine cologne and matches. The smell that I had grown to love. The smell that made me smile. The smell of Magnus.

The memory I had fought for so long, intrusive and uninvited, flashed in my mind's eye. Each one digging a tiny hole in the walls around my heart. Few had entered that gate and even fewer were allowed to stay. The walls were cracking now and as they broke, I felt tiny tracks of salt water trace down my cheeks.

I bent in on myself, curling into a protective ball, and gripped on to the sheets. I needed something to keep my grounded in the darkness.

"I refuse to have a-a disgusting faggot as my son! We can fix you Alexander, we can help you."

Oh god no. The voice in my head made a sob rack my body and I buried my face into a pillow that smelled like bleach.

The smell did it and I was plunged head first into the memory.

Why was the room all dark? Where was I? What-why-how did I get here?

A million questions raced through my mind as I tried to gage the situation. Then I remembered. I was at the hospital and-and...

I was blind now.

Just the idea of constant darkness scared the shit out of me. How could I live like this? I was already enough of a freak, now I had to be the freaky freak.

Then I remembered the reason why I was in the hospital and dealing with everything I was.

Jonathan.

The bleach.

The burning.

The darkness.

Then a click sounded somewhere off to my right and I jumped so far out of the bed, I knocked a set of cold tools off some side tables. I was shaking, hard. Then a familiar gruff voice said, "Calm down Alexander. You will not embarrass me by acting like a startled deer. You stop that retarded shivering right now! I have some very serious business to talk to you about."

Oh dear heavenly father. I was shaking harder than ever but I said in a steady voice, "What do you need to talk to me about?" I had to keep the bluff up. It may not be what I thought it was. Maybe it would be about Jonathan getting ex-

"I-I have heard stories from Valentine about what other kids have said and what Jonathan has said and-and I want you to know that my mother and I understand. "

I couldn't help but stare, open mouthed, out into space. This was all I could hope for. This was better than anything I could have dreamed up. It felt amazing.

Of course, I had to stutter though, "Re-really I-I didn't think. I-I didn't know. I'm s-sorry."

I felt a cold and callosed hand on my shoulder and I jumped slightly before settling back down.

"We do Alec. We get that it wasn't your choice but we can help you. Valentine knows a wonderful man in Connecticut who treats these types of cases."

Now I was staring into the darkness in front of me out of confusion. Treat me?

"What do you mean? How can you 'treat me?" My voice was starting to rise slightly in pitch. I always had had this problem. When I got nervous I always sand sharp. I thought about how Mr. Huft would tell me to try to speak from my diaphragm. Quickly I refocused on what my father was saying.

"We both know you can't stay like this Alexander really. Right now you're a disgrace but Valentine says after a few months at this clinic you will be back to the person I know and love."

Now I wasn't caring whether or not my voice was steadily rising in pitch and volume. I just needed to figure what the freak was going on here. The words he was saying were clicking together to create a painting that scared me. He was still my dad. He was still the same person that used to take me out to the forest to go hunting. Why was he saying these words that dug tiny daggers into my heart.

"How-how am I a disgrace? I've done nothing wrong. I'm the same person I always was. Why can't you understand that? Don't you still love me?" Everything was starting to hurt. My head, from trying to comprehend what made my father talk and act like this. My eyes from trying to keep them open and my heart, from slowly understanding that my father thought I was a monster.

He must have stood up and started pacing because a second later I heard the scraping of chair legs and then the scuff of his boots. Half a minute later he said in a harsh, angry whisper, "I refuse to have a-a disgusting faggot as my son! We can fix you Alexander, we can help you."

Now I was crying but I screamed, not caring who heard, the one thing I could say, "Why?!"

When my dad, the person I had feared for months for this very reason, said those next words in the most calm and dead serious tone, I realized he was serious and that I would never ever be able to tell him I loved him again.

"Because Alexander. I would rather you be dead then gay."

As I came back to myself and the present, I was struggling to breath. The whole thing had caused me to fall into a living hell. That sentence had broke everything I had to live for. Music didn't seem to have a point.

Why sing some silly show tune when your father thinks you should be dead than be who you are?

But now I had something to sing for. Now I realized that I had people that loved me just the way I was.

My always lovely and beautiful baby sister. My baby sister who the day she found out about me and what exactly I was told me that I was beautiful and that she loved me from the moon and back, even though she was just nine. My baby sister who knew just the right thing to say. My baby sister who was the most beautiful person in and out that ever walked the earth.

Jace, my best friend and brother through fire and everything else the world threw at who treated me like I was an equal even though we both knew he was better than me at everything. Jace who would probably help me hide several bodies and make a joke about how I was a busy man after words before clapping me on the back and helping me home. Jace who put everyone before himself and wore his heart on his sleeve even if he doesn't know it. Jace who was one of the two people on this earth that I'm one hundred percent certain that I can trust with anything.

I had things to live for. I had things to sing about. I had a reason to forget my dad and his prejudices, his hateful words.

So when my beautiful baby sister showed up 30 minutes later I was dry eyed and her sweet pea and vanilla perfume made a smile spread across my face. She got a wheelchair even though I told her I was fine to hobble out and together we left the hell of a hospital and my memories behind after lot paperwork.

Later as I fell into bed, after a short argument with Isabelle about how "fine" I was to be here alone and making sure I wouldn't wander off in the middle of the night, I grabbed a piece of a lyric;

Live fast and die young

Forget the past and move on

What's done is done

Then I rolled over and fell into a sleep filled with dreams of chords and lyrics about life, love, sisters, adoptive brothers, and beautiful green eyes that I will never be able to see.

_xxXxx_

Well hell that was kind of crappy wasn't it...

I had to wing the flashback so I apologize for that

But ah well screw correct tenses! Who needs them?

Oh! The lyrics and from one of my new obsessions called "Noserings and Shoestrings" by Nina Nesbitt.

It's amazing and I hope you check it out!

As always Readers & Reviewers Hope You Enjoyed It and Happy Trails

(Don't forget to tell me what to do when we reach 100 reviews! Any ideas are welcome)

~L.C