Chapter 17: The Root of Evil

It was another glorious day. A handful of billowy cumulus clouds just touched the mountaintops in the distance as the higher cirrus clouds slowly swung their horse tails in the sky. Viridescent forests climbed up the mountain foothills, met by pure mountain streams that flowed down and fed them from the melting snowpack. The streams merged into a meandering river that shined with silvery sparkles as it lazily flowed away to the horizon.

Taichi and Kurosawa were sitting at a small table in the outdoor portion of the JRCS staff cafeteria. The scenic vista spread out before them in the distance.

Kurosawa had just asked Taichi to repeat his question from Tuesday's lunch.

He did. "Sir, why is there so much evil in the world? If God loves us, why does He allow bad things to happen to good people?"

Taichi knew his question was not easy to answer, so he waited patiently for his boss to respond.

Meanwhile, Kurosawa was using his chopsticks to grab and pop a small rolled omelette into his mouth. Then another. Then another.

Taichi continued to wait. After a minute Kurosawa said, "Lad! Don't just sit there like a statue. Eat! Give me a minute. I'm thinking about how to answer your question."

Taichi obeyed. He twirled some noodles on his chopsticks and sucked them in.

After another minute Kurosawa finally spoke. "Hmm, all right. Tell me, Yaegashi, I have a question for you."

"Yes, sir?"

"Can God make a stone that is so heavy that He cannot lift it?"

Taichi was confused. "Huh? That is something a child would ask."

"Yes, but how would you answer that question if you were God?"

"I wouldn't. It's a silly question."

"Ok, but why is it a silly question?"

"Well, it just is. It's just.. a bogus question, that's all."

"You mean the question is invalid."

"Yes, exactly."

"But, Yaegashi, why is it invalid?"

"Uhm.." He thought some more. "Because it just is."

Kurosawa smiled. "The proper response, Yaegashi, is to say that the question is invalid because it is ill-posed. The question is based on the assumption that God would ever desire to do something against His own will. The question stumbles on the double-meaning of the word 'can'. It conflates its two definitions: to allow (you may) and to want (desire to)."

"You mean kind of like the question, 'When did you stop beating your wife?'"

"Well, I suppose, sort of. But that question makes a different bogus assumption, that the person had been beating his wife, and the only question was to determine when he had stopped beating her. It's a cheap rhetorical trick."

"I see."

"So getting back to the original subject.. now tell me Yaegashi, what do you think of your question now, 'Why does God allow evil?'"

Taichi thought a bit. "Hmm. I think what you are saying is that it is like the rock that God cannot lift, right? The question itself is ill-posed. Invalid."

"Yes. But why is it ill-posed?"

Taichi thought some more. "It is because the question stumbles over the meaning of the word 'allow', just like the first question question does over the word 'can'."

"You are correct. The question conflates the meaning that word, to permit (you may) versus to want (desire to). Now, in this case the second meaning is a bit more subtle than the rock question, because it turns on an implicit implication that God can do anything He desires, and so therefore He ought to be able to prevent evil and yet He does not."

"I see. So in other words, what you are saying is that God permits evil to exist, but He does not desire it. But then please tell me, sir, why did God create evil in the first place if He does not want it?"

"You are asking me why did God create evil?"

"Yeah."

Kurosawa looked a bit disappointed, for he saw that Taichi had just asked another ill-posed question without realizing it. He felt that Taichi should have been able to answer it himself. Kurosawa thought a moment about how to best explain it as simply as possible.

He finally said, "Give me that clean paper napkin." Taichi handed it to him.

Kurosawa took out a ballpoint pen and carefully drew a round line on it. Then he showed it to Taichi. "What is that?"

"You drew a circle."

"Yes, a circle. That is my answer to your question."

Taichi picked up the napkin and looked at it. "This is a riddle." He tried the understand the point that Kurosawa was trying to make. "Does it have something to do with the Taijitu, the Great Circle with the yin and yang? That good and evil are opposite forces?"

Kurosawa indulgently replied, "Nice guess, but no. Try again."

Taichi thought some more. Eventually he gave up. He had no idea what Kurosawa was driving at. He decided to wait patiently for Kurosawa to explain the riddle to him.

Meanwhile, Kurosawa saw that Taichi wasn't eating. Kurosawa narrowed his eyes a bit and looked at Taichi's plate, then at him, then at his plate once more. Taichi got the hint and began digging into his meal again. As he did so, Kurosawa explained, "The answer to my little riddle, dear lad, is the circle itself. Its existence. Did God create that? I don't mean this particular one, I mean the idea, the concept, of a circle."

Taichi thought. "Uhm, well, not 'create' as such, no. The idea of a circle exists independently of any creator. It would exist even if there was no God at all."

"Right. A circle exists intrinsically. It has always been 'created', so to speak, not by God per se, but by the fundamental rules of basic mathematics. These basic laws exist independently of any creator. A circle is the natural result of constructing the set of all points on the Euclidean plane that are at a given distance r from a given point. The end result is always a circle."

"I see. So what you are implying is that evil works the same way, yes? That evil is the result of some deeper, more fundamental, rules."

"Am I? Keep going."

"And, uh, and so.." Taichi furrowed his brow. ".. and so there might be rules that are so deep that they are intrinsic to how everything works, right? So the 'circle of evil', so to speak, is intrinsic. It is intrinsic not in the sense of God creating our particular universe or world, but in how any such universe by necessity must operate. At least any interesting one. And so to prevent a circle from being created, Euclid could have stopped with simply a one-dimensional geometry instead of a three-dimensional one, say, a number line, like the ones we studied in elementary school. That would prevent anyone from creating an 'evil circle'. But such a geometry would be incredibly boring and uninteresting."

Kurosawa's eyes twinkled a bit. "Very good Yaegashi. You just said something profound."

"Uh, I did?"

Then Kurosawa appeared to change the subject. "Tell me, Yaegashi, why do predators exist?"

That thew Taichi off a bit. He wasn't sure where Kurosawa was going with his new question. He thought some more. "Uhm, predators exist because they are a fundamental part of how life works..?"

Kurosawa beamed at him, "Excellent! Yes, predators do seem to be everywhere. Even amoebas are predators. Organisms would have never progressed beyond the level of pre-eukaryotic cells otherwise. Mitochondria would have never been captured, for example, and that is a necessary prerequisite to form cells that contain a distinct nucleus with internal organelles, without which life would have been incredibly dull and uninteresting. And so we have predators."

Taichi said, "And so.. on a human level it's the same thing, right? It's a fundamental side effect of our having free will. If humans could never prey on other humans, if evil was not possible, then we would lose all of our free will, our freedom to make moral choices. And the freedom to make those choices is important to Him, yes? It part of what makes us precious in His eyes.."

"Yes. A forced confession is useless, empty. Meaningless. Worse than useless, actually."

"Of course. Otherwise we would be nothing more than dolls, robots."

"Which is why free will is fundamental. But tell me, Yaegashi, why not just simply outlaw all evil acts? Why not just create, say, some kind of worldwide police force that would always intervene as soon as we tried to do anything wrong?"

"Uhm.. because then there would just be resentment added as well. The desire for rebellion would be universal, and be quite justified to boot."

"Okay. But now we are back to square one."

Taichi sighed, "Ugh. I never realized how tricky it is.."

"You're catching on. And yet we know that God's solution is elegant. We know that His creation is amazing and majestic. I mean, just look at it." Kurosawa gestured to the scenic vista on the horizon. "All of the wonderful and beautiful scenery that you see before you was constructed from just four basic physical forces operating on a handful of elementary particles."

"And it is the same with us at the human level, right? That there are just a few basic rules of behavior? God has established those basic principles, like free will, which are needed in order for us to choose to love Him of our own volition. And so evil was also permitted, but not as flaw or defect, but rather as a necessary side effect of our ability to make choices."

"Correct. I think C.S. Lewis said it best. 'Because free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having. A world of automata - of creatures that worked like machines - would hardly be worth creating. The happiness which God designs for His higher creatures is the happiness of being freely, voluntarily united to Him and to each other in an ecstasy of love and delight compared with which the most rapturous love between a man and a woman on this earth is mere milk and water. And for that they've got to be free.' "

He went on. "When Adam and Eve ate from the Tree of Good and Evil, it gave them the awareness of the ability to make moral choices, which they then could make of their own free will."

Taichi leaned forward. "But sir, didn't they already have free will before the Fall? And if so, why couldn't they do evil acts before then?"

"They did have it, but they were also in perfect communion with God, so having evil thoughts didn't even occur to them. They didn't sin because it just wasn't even conceivable. Afterwards it was."

"But why not just have both? Why can't we have perfect communion with Him and the awareness to make moral choices, all at the same time?"

Kurosawa spun another noodle ball. "Well, you can either have the knowledge and ability to make moral choices - and face the consequences - or you can have direct contact with God, and with it immortality, and never stray because it never even enters your mind. You cannot have both. Once the option is open you are going to slip up. It's inevitable, and then communion with Him becomes impossible. Well, that is, at least not until you introduce some kind of reconciliation mechanism."

"You mean Christ."

"Yes."

"So, evil is basically the inevitable byproduct of our having free will combined with our ability to make moral choices."

"More or less." Kurosawa unspooled the noodle ball into his mouth.

"I see." Taichi understood that much now, but then he thought of another objection. He leaned forward and asked, "But then please tell me, sir, why does God allow so much suffering in the world? Why does He allow bad things to happen to good people? I don't mean evil acts, but things like accidents, illnesses, natural disasters and such?"

The large man finished downing his rice and said, "Ah, your second question from Tuesday. That one goes even deeper than your first. Indeed, it goes about as deep as any such philosophical question can go. You certainly do have a knack for asking hard questions, my boy."

Kurosawa leaned back. "Well, the truth is, I don't have a fully satisfactory answer for you."

Taichi looked a bit disappointed.

Kurosawa put down his chopsticks. This was the first time Taichi saw him actually stop eating during their talks. "But I tell you what, I'll give it my best shot. Is that okay?"

"Thank you sir. I appreciate it."

"Hmm. Okay.. let me think a moment."

Taichi waited.

"Hmm. Here it goes. Now, please understand that this is only my personal view on the subject. Don't take my word as gospel."

"Of course, sir. I understand."

"Well, let me see. First of all, let me ask you another question: What kind of world would you like there to be? Would you like a world that was a utopia where there was no pain, no labor, no hills to climb? Nothing to accomplish? No obstacles? No challenges?"

"Well, uh.. no.."

"Now, pick any human trait or quality that you admire."

"Hmm. Courage."

"Courage only exists in the face of adversity. Whether it be war, serious health issues, or a threat to oneself or another. In a utopia there would be no need for courage. Now pick another."

"Compassion."

"Compassion only exists where another is in pain or in need. Otherwise there would be no need for sympathy, no empathy. Or how about healing? Healing can only exist where there is sickness or injury. We can keep doing this endlessly. Taichi, don't you see? No good quality of man can exist without suffering in the world. We have to understand and accept this."

Taichi said thoughtfully, "I see. I know this is a basic Buddhist teaching."

"Indeed. It is one of Buddhism's most central concepts, called dukkha. The Buddhist's response to suffering is basically, 'Yeah, life sucks and then you die. So deal with it.' This is why Buddhism teaches that we ought to detatch ourselves from worldly desires in favor of spiritual ones. I do respect Buddhism in that regard, but as a Christian I know there is far more to it than that."

Kurosawa folded his napkin. "Now, you remember on Tuesday the hint that I gave you, the three words that I told you to think about?"

"Corrective, constructive, and controlling."

"That's right. In light of our discussion so far, do you think you can explain them to me?"

Taichi thought a moment. "Well, sir, I think I understand the first one. By 'corrective' you were referring to the bad things that can happen to us as a direct consequence of our own willful, negligent, or foolish actions. Things that are our own fault. For example, when a chain smoker gets lung cancer. Or when a driver doesn't wear his seat-belt and flies through a windshield. It is our own fault that these bad things happen."

"Fair enough. And the second, constructive?"

Taichi put down his chopsticks. "There is an old saying, 'Whatever does not kill you makes you stronger.' I think here you were referring to the bad things that happen in your life that temper or mold your character, that change you, that make you a wiser or a better person for it."

"I did. And it includes even things that actually kill your body, even though the Lord will never put you in a situation beyond what your spirit can bear."

"I see." Then Taichi took a chance and said, "And it includes the reason why you are sitting in that wheelchair."

Kurosawa was impressed with Taichi's insight. He had never told him what happened. "You're right. And one day I will tell you my story, but not today. Our remaining lunch time is getting too short."

It was at a later lunch that Kurosawa explained to Taichi his story, of how God had to break his body to break him. To break him of his own smug sense of moral superiority over his tormentors, and how he had fancied himself to be like Jesus in that regard, when in truth he had acted more like a Pharisee as he accused and condemned everyone around him for their moral failings. It wasn't until his body was broken and his mother taken away - the only person in the world who he felt had loved him up to that point - that his spirit was changed, and he was transformed, as he finally understood what Jesus had really done for him and everyone else at Calvary. And from that he understood what mercy and compassion really were, and it changed his life forever.

"Of course sir, I understand."

Kurosawa started eating the remainder of his meal again. Taichi then leaned forward and asked, "But sir, I'm still unsure about that last one, 'controlling'. From what you've said so far today I think I have a small glimmer of what you were hinting at, but I still don't really get most of it. I don't understand why God would allow all those terrible disasters to occur, like massive earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanoes, and such."

"All right. Give me a moment to think." Kurosawa sat back. "Again, please keep in mind that these are just my own opinions and should not be taken as gospel."

"Of course."

Kurosawa decided that he had finished his meal even though his plate wasn't empty, which was uncharacteristic of him.

"I have another question for you, Yaegashi. Tell me, what is mankind's oldest sin?"

Taichi knew that one was easy. "It is to try to become like God, which is what the serpent said in his lie to Adam and Eve to induce them to eat of the Tree."

"Correct. In other words, mankind's oldest sin is in trying to replace God. We do it over and over. We do it every time we try to create a utopia based on so-called 'scientific' principles. And it doesn't matter if it is a workers paradise, a Volksgemeinschaft, a Nietzschen dictatorship, or any other form of secular society that rejects God. These attempted utopias have always failed, and they always will. One reason they keep doing it is because the 19th century German secular philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said, 'God is dead, and we have killed him.' He said that God could be replaced by the Ubermensch, the superman. All that was needed was the will and the power to do so."

Taichi chuckled, "Isn't that the old joke?"

God is dead.
-Nietzsche

Nietzsche is dead.
-God

Kurosawa grinned, "Well, yes, heh. And it doesn't help his case that he went completely insane at the end, running around the streets of Turin babbling about being crucified." Then his face became more serious. "More to the point, I think these attempts are one reason why natural disasters periodically happen to us. You see, I think that God needs to kick down our little anthills once in a while, to remind us who is really in charge. We humans try to create great societies, construct large public works, build majestic bridges, tall buildings, and huge cities. And we can marvel at all of these great achievements. But we need to remember that we are not in charge of the place. Somebody else is in charge. And I think our landlord has to periodically remind us of that."

Taichi grinned, "And a good thing too, otherwise there would be no need for people like you or me."

Kurosawa made a small smile again. "Yes, if there were no disasters you and I would be out of a job. We'd be unemployed." His face became oddly wistful. "I look forward to that day.."

"Sir?"

"The day when the suffering ends, when the story is finished."

Taichi wasn't following. "The story?"

"Oh, I mean God's story, the Bible. The story begins with God's chosen people, the Israelites - the name the Lord gave to Jacob after he wrestled with the angel: Israel, 'He who wrestles with God'. The Israelites are literally the God-wrestlers. The Old Testament is a basically a love story about a parent and His wayward children. God had sent his prophets to His unruly children, the God-wrestlers, to try to bring them back home to Him. That's the whole OT in a nutshell. And He never gave up on them. And He still hasn't given up on them, and He never will.

"And then, in the New Testament, the story expands. His offer is extended to all of us to become His adopted children, to cross the impossible gap with His Son as the bridge, to give us the opportunity to reconcile us all with Him so that we can all call Him 'Abba' (Daddy) and finally be united with Him and be brought home. But instead we rebelled and killed Him. And we will continue to rebel again and again, right to the very end, until the day He returns and we are finally reconciled and brought home to Daddy."

Taichi asked, "But why make us go through all that suffering and pain in order to get there?"

"Ah, you asked another good question. Yes, why didn't the Lord simply jump to the end of the story? Why not just jump to the Bible's final chapter, Revelations 22, and leave out all the other 1,180 chapters and all that history, most of which was abject misery? Why not just have everyone go to live in with Him in Heaven right at the start?"

"I don't understand it either, sir. Why did all this rebelling and suffering have to happen first?"

"Well, I think it is because God is trying to make a point. You see, I think that all of human history is basically a demonstration exercise."

"A demonstration exercise?"

"Yes."

"But for who? Himself?"

"No of course not, silly."

"Then for who?"

The chime sounded for the end of the lunch hour. Kurosawa looked at his watch. "Well, you and I need to go back to work. Meanwhile I'll let you think about that last question for next time. Here's a hint: The ceiling of the Sistine Chapel."

"Oh.. uh, yes sir, thank you. And thank you so much for taking so much of your valuable time to talk with me. I know you are a busy man."

Kurosawa laughed, "Not at all, lad! I always have time for a seeker." He knew that Taichi already had a servant's heart, pure and selfless. It was an amazing gift the lad had. But still, Kurosawa felt that Taichi wasn't quite ready, not yet. But he was close. His heart understood it instinctively, but not his head. Not yet, anyway. And no amount of conversation, or studying, or meetings, or reading, would do it. The tipping point would probably be some completely unexpected event or calamity in his life. Kurosawa knew that God always worked on His own timetable. It would happen then, and not before then, or not at all.

Taichi began to stand up.

Kurosawa pushed him back down. "Wait just one more moment. I have something else to discuss with you. This won't take long." Taichi pulled up his seat to the table again.

Kurosawa's face was frowning. "Our little friendly lunch is over. I am now speaking to you officially as your boss." He clasped his hands together on the table. "Yaegashi, I had a little meeting with Keiso in my office yesterday. I have to say, I am rather disappointed in both of you."

Taichi was startled. "Oh.." He felt ashamed. "I am very sorry sir." He stood quickly and bowed in apology. "Iori Nagase was a good friend of mine. She was hurt and in trouble, and I simply wanted to help her.."

"I understand that. But instead of sneaking in to her hospital room you should have come to me first. I would have figured out a way to let you talk to her without violating police regulations."

"I know sir. I am sorry."

"Now, I realize that you had the best of motives, and that you are new here, and you didn't know me yet, so I suppose I can give you some leniency. I'm actually more disappointed with Keiso than with you."

Kurosawa sighed. "It wasn't until later that day I suspected something was amiss. I could tell just by looking at your two guilty faces during the orientation meeting. You obviously were both embarrassed to be in the same room together. So I asked Keiso what was going on. Keiso ought to have known better than to try to hide something like that from me. I had to pull his sorry ass into my office to drag the truth out of him. If it's any consolation, Yaegashi, he tried valiantly to protect you. But still, I really ought to suspend him..."

Taichi interjected, "No! Please don't sir! It was all my fault for trying to see Nagase without authorization. So if you must punish anyone, please punish me, not him. None of it would have happened if it wasn't for me."

His boss smiled. "Somehow I knew you'd say that. Yaegashi, you are a fine lad and your selflessness does you credit. Your new bride is a very lucky woman. And I do think you have a bright future here at the JRCS." Then Kurosawa's smile stopped. "But I need to caution you, Yaegashi. You are far too quick to sacrifice yourself for the sake of others, to the point of recklessness. We need to work on that character flaw, you and I."

Taichi looked down. "Yes, sir, I know. My wife says the same thing to me all the time."

"She does? She is a smart woman. I wouldn't mind meeting her some day." He paused. "By the way, I trust that everything is okay at home..?" The question was clearly a leading one. Again Taichi was surprised at Kurosawa's perceptiveness.

Taichi decided to be honest. "Sir, I won't deny that my wife and I have had some rough patches lately. Between our new marriage, our moving into a new apartment, and some.. other things.. she has been under a lot of stress lately.." He faltered.

Kurosawa knew that now was not the right time to try to pry into his subordinate's personal life. He raised his hand to prevent Taichi from continuing. "Stop. Sorry for getting us off track. Anyway, getting back to your job here at the JRCS, you need to think before you leap into action to try to rescue somebody. Don't let your natural impulses take over heedlessly. You have a bad habit where you jump in without thinking first, regardless of the consequences to yourself and others."

"Yes, sir."

"Let's consider your new wife. How do you think your wife would react if, for example, you got yourself killed while foolishly trying to rescue somebody from a burning building that was obviously going to collapse? Your young bride would be left a widow. How do you think she would feel about the fact that you had thrown away your life so foolishly?"

Taichi recalled Inaba's many stern lectures on that subject.

He went on. "And if you had children? They would grow up without a father. How do you think they would feel about your reckless act?"

Taichi hadn't thought of that. It was true that he very much wanted to have children some day. Inaba was more ambivalent, saying she wasn't sure if she could be a good mother. In response Taichi said that, if necessary, he'd wear the apron and play Mr. Mom while she worked. Inaba told him to stop joking around, but he told her he was serious. Inaba then did her usual facepalm.

Kurosawa was still admonishing him. "Do you want that? Do you think she wants that?"

"Of course not, sir."

"So lead with your heart, yes, but also use your head. Much of the training that we do here at the JRCS is to learn to set priorities, to optimize the use of our very limited resources, so that we can save as many lives as we can. But we cannot save everyone, we simply can't. I know you want to try, and it speaks highly of your character, but we just can't. You need to learn that."

"I understand. Thank you for reminding me, sir."

Kurosawa made a thin-lipped smile. "Oh, I'm going to do way more than that, Yaegashi. I am setting up a full-scale disaster-relief training exercise for the entire team. We are going to simulate a major disaster right here in Yamaboshi. I will tell you right up front: You will be tested. Hard. I'm not telling you any secrets here. I'm going to announce this to everybody at the next meeting. Each member of my staff will be tested in a different way, and believe me it will not be easy for any of you."

"You are going to test me?"

"Yes. I won't reveal to you exactly what your particular test is going to be, but you need to be ready for it. You will be officially rated and evaluated based on how well you perform in this disaster drill. It will determine whether you will be assigned to the front line or relegated to a desk job."

Taichi practically saluted. "Yes sir! I promise I will do my best."

Kurosawa's wheelchair pulled away from the table. But just before he proceeded inside, he turned one last time to face his subordinate.

"I am sure you will."

Inaba was sitting on the bench in the park that was located across the street from the apartment. She was waiting for Taichi to pick her up for their scheduled dinner date with her father. She was not aware that Iori was watching her at that moment from the window.

The weather was not unpleasant, but it was getting late in the day, and it was chilly enough for Inaba to be wearing a light coat. She knew that Taichi would be picking her up in about an hour.

As she waited she noticed that the mama duck had returned and was leading her brood of ducklings across the pond again.

A few minutes later someone sat on the bench next to her. She didn't have to turn her head to know who it was.

"I was wondering when you'd show up again."

"Good afternoon, Inaba. A lovely day, isn't it?"

Inaba crossed her arms and continued to avoid Rina's gaze. As she stared at the ducklings she muttered, "Bite me."

Rina casually crossed her legs and leaned back on the bench. "Now my dear, that is no way to talk to your benefactor. My plan to get rid of Heartseed is proceeding on schedule. You should be happy. After all, soon you will free of him for good. Aren't you happy?"

Inaba continued to stare ahead. "Shut up. I know what the 'small payment' is that you want from me, that 'little thing'."

"Ah, I see."

Inaba finally swirled around. She gave Rina a death glare. "You rotten bitch! You want to take my baby, just like Rumpelstiltskin. It's just like the fairy story. And it is so cliché."

Rina looked a bit confused. "I'm sorry, my dear, but I'm not following you. Are you saying I want to steal away your child?"

"Yes!"

Rina looked incredulous. "What? Oh no, my dear girl. I am afraid you misunderstood me completely."

"Wait, you mean, you don't want to take my baby and raise it yourself?"

Rina made a puzzled expression. "No. Why would I want that? That would be silly. How could I raise a child? I'm not even corporeal. It's absurd."

"Then what..?"

Rina's voice was low and menacing. "I want your fetus. But not like that."

Inaba's eyes widened in shock. "You're.. you're going to induce a miscarriage.."

Rina made a face. "Pshaw. That is even more absurd. I would never do that. In your shared grief it would only cause you and Taichi to bond more tightly. If anything it would bring you two closer together."

Inaba felt relieved. But..

"So what is it you want from me then?"

Rina moved in close. Inaba could feel her breath and see her eyes shining with menace. She saw a tinge of red around the irises. Inaba leaned away instinctively.

"What I want, my dear girl, is very simple."

"Which is?"

"Do what you have already decided to do."

"What?"

Rina sat up and crossed her arms in disappointment. Heartseed had claimed this girl was supposed to be intelligent, and yet she still didn't get it.

Rina rolled her eyes in exasperation. Finally she said, "I can read your mind, you fool. I know what you think. You believe that you will never be a good mother. You also believe that your traditionally-minded father will insist you stay at home to raise your child even if it meant you not succeeding him to run his empire, which is his most cherished desire. I see it all in your unconscious mind. I can see it. I can see it all. And there's more."

"There's.. more?"

"Yes. For example, I know the true purpose for your forcing Taichi to marry you. I see it, why you married him. It wasn't because you loved him, to live happily ever after and all that rot. Of course not. You will never be happy. Ever. It's not in your character. In your heart of hearts you know you will never be happy no matter what happens. And so you know that your love for Taichi is selfish and greedy. That is why you stole him away from Iori and destroyed her life. You're a pathetically selfish person. You simply grabbed whatever you wanted, and damn the consequences to anyone else.

"But even so, you would never force Taichi into marriage just for your own lustful desire to own and possess him forever. No, you would not do that. Your wonderful propensity for guilt wouldn't allow it. For you see, you had a different reason. The one I see. The real one."

"Which was?"

"It is simple. You married him to protect him. You think that if you were married it would create a reason for him to continue living, to stop him from getting himself killed with his suicidal reckless selflessness. You hoped that once he was married that he might think twice before jumping into the fire.

"But now that you married him you realize that you were wrong, that despite all your best efforts, no matter how hard you try, that Taichi's rescue instincts will inevitably get himself killed one day. And probably sooner than later. And now you know that despite your foolish desire to protect him, it will happen anyway. You will become a widow before you are 25. He will die and you will be alone again. I see it all in your mind. You know it. You deny it, but it's there.

"And you know that you could never raise a child alone. You literally don't know how to do it. And you would never delegate the task to a bunch of nameless Korean nannies. Never. You would never do that. To grow up isolated, alone, and unloved? Like you yourself were raised? Never."

Inaba felt convicted. She remained silent.

Rina casually tossed her hair back. "Anyway, you have already decided. You just haven't admitted it to yourself yet."

"You mean.."

"Yes, you have decided to end your pregnancy. And that is what I want. Just do what you have already decided to do. That's it."

"Just that?"

"Yes. That's it. It's simple, really. It's all I want, nothing more. You see, despite what Heartseed might say about me, I'm actually a reasonable person."

Inaba stared at her enemy. She spat back, "Go to hell."

"Too late." Rina then looked idly at her long fingernails. "We have a agreement. A contract. You can't back out now."

"What? It's not like I signed anything in blood!"

Rina's eyes flashed again. She said with quiet malice, "Actually, that is precisely what you did. In blood."

Inaba understood. Her child's blood was her own. But still.. "But why? What possible benefit could there be for you if I.."

"That doesn't concern you."

Inaba was adamant. "It does! Tell me why!"

Rina made a small grin. "Because you have become interesting to me. Heartseed wants you. Now I want you too."

"I don't understand."

Rina threw back her retort: "You don't have to."

Rina was quite pleased with herself, for she knew that the contract would allow her to destroy not only the Pentagon but also Heartseed as well.

Her job was done. She got up and began to leave.

Then she turned around.

"Oh, one last thing. If you even think about abrogating our blood contract, then know this: I will make full use of the revenge clause. I will attack and destroy you, and Kiriyama, and Aoki, and Nagase. All of you. And do it completely unfettered. And I will take my delight in doing so."

"Please, no.."

"Oh, and your father too. That one would just be for kicks. You are such a fool. I still can't believe that you actually forgot to include him in the protection clause. Maybe I should destroy him right now.."

"No! Don't!"

Rina sighed. "Oh, now, now." She gave her prey an indulgent smile. "I do like you, Inaba. I really do. So I will be magnanimous and give you another gift. A gesture of goodwill on my part. I will add your father to the protection clause of our contract. He's safe now. See? I can be a very reasonable person."

Inaba jumped up. "Get out of here! I never want to see your face again!"

"Don't worry, you won't."

"Go!"

Rina began to leave.

Something tickled at the back of Inaba's mind.

I will attack and destroy you, and Kiriyama, and Aoki, and Nagase.

Wait.. what about..

A name was missing. She realized something horrible.

"Wait! Stop!" Rina did.

Inaba's voice quavered as she spoke. "You threatened Iori, Yui, Aoki, myself, and my father."

"Yes, I did."

"But you didn't threaten Taichi.."

"No, I did not." Rina was impressed. Maybe Inaba wasn't so stupid after all.

Inaba grew more agitated. "Tell me why.. tell me why you didn't include Taichi!?"

Rina smiled again. "You already know."

Inaba understood the implication. Taichi was already doomed.

Inaba fell on her knees before Number Three. "No.. no.. no.."

"Mmm?"

"Please, you have to protect him. Stop it from happening. Stop him from killing himself."

Rina was quite pleased with seeing Inaba kneeling down before her in this way. "And if I do?"

Inaba looked up. "Then I will.. I will do whatever you want."

"You will?"

"Yes! Yes! Just don't let him die!" She looked down again as her tears spattered the grass beneath.

"Everyone dies, my dear."

"You know what I mean!"

Rina began to think. This was an unexpected opportunity. The actual reason she omitted Taichi's name was because she had no authority over him. She was strictly prohibited with interfering with the lives of such people. Inaba had simply misunderstood the reason for the omission.

The man was indeed doomed, and there was nothing Number Three could do about it one way or the other.

Still, was there a way to twist Inaba's misunderstanding to her advantage?

Rina spoke carefully. "If you keep our contract, he is protected under it. I promise that I will do everything possible to save him."

Inaba looked up with hope in her eyes. "You'll protect him?"

"Yes, as much as I can."

Rina could do nothing to prevent or change Taichi's fate, so her answer was technically truthful.

"Thank you.. all right. Then I'll do it."

"Of course you will." Rina lovingly touched Inaba's head, for she knew that Inaba was hers now.

Rina said reassuringly, "Like I said, I am a reasonable person. And you have already made your choice, so it really doesn't matter anyway."

Inaba got up again. She spat back, "Now get the hell out of here, you bitch."

Rina took the insult in stride. "Very well, I will honor your wish. As I said, you will never see my face ever again."

Inaba barked, "Good."

"Farewell, my dear Himeko Yaegashi."

Rina left.

Inaba then sat back down alone on the park bench. She was in abject misery as she put her head in her hands. Then she looked up at the sky in despair.

This is all my fault: what happened to Iori and her wreck of a life, what I'm doing to Taichi, Rina's threat against all of them. It's all my fault.

She ruefully looked at the ducklings again.

She felt they were the lucky ones.

An hour later a black limo picked up Inaba from the park. Taichi was already waiting inside. She sat next to him soundlessly. One look at her face and he knew that whatever was bothering her, it was bad this time. She needed his support. As much as he could give her.

And so he did. She curled up next to him in the back seat. He stroked her hair as he held her. Neither spoke.

He recognized her body language. He had seen it before during the reconciliation stage of their many fights. He gently held her like he had done so many times before. She rested her head in the crook of his arm and closed her eyes like a baby.

But this time he knew the cause wasn't another fight. Iori had explained it to him.

Finally he said quietly, "Heartseed, right?"

She nodded slightly while still nestled under his shoulder with her eyes closed. "Yeah."

"You got trapped. Boxed in. There's a secret you can't tell us."

"No.. I can't.." She looked up at him. "How did you know?"

"Iori figured it out."

Of course she did. "Taichi, I can't.."

He pulled her closer. "Shush. It's okay. You don't have to tell me. I won't ask."

"I'm so sorry.."

"No, it's okay. Remember when you suspected that Rina was forcing me to keep the secret about the age reversals? You began to suspect I was hiding something, and so you got angry and forced the secret out of me. Remember that?"

Inaba curled herself tighter into a ball. "I just made things worse. I only hurt you. I'm still so sorry for doing that to you."

"Forgiven and forgotten. The point is, I won't ask."

There was a pause. She looked up at him. His heart was breaking as he looked at her tragic face.

He kept reassuring her. "It's okay. The rest of us all know what is going on here. And so we are all going to support you in this battle. We're going to stick together in this fight. It's the only way to defeat those.. things.."

"Okay.."

Then Taichi said simply, "I love you."

She looked down at the floor of the limo and huddled herself back into the crook of his arm again. Meanwhile the Korean limo driver stared straight ahead.

Oh Taichi, I love you so much. But it's just my selfishness.

I forced this marriage on you. For myself.

She thought some more.

Or did I? Rina said I actually married you to try to prevent you from killing yourself.

Did I?

I think maybe I did.

And if I did..

.. that's not selfish.

She knew. Whatever was the actual unconscious reason for her pushing the marriage on him, she knew that she genuinely cared for him and his well-being. Not all of her motives were pure, but she knew that feeling was. She cared for him so deeply that she would sacrifice anything and everything to save him.

Even sacrifice herself.

No, that is not what a selfish person would do.

With that realization she smiled inwardly. And with that thought she was able look up into his eyes again. She said the words.

"I love you too."

The dinner was over. The young couple were riding in the back of the limo to return to their apartment.

Inaba was now sitting upright next to him. She was feeling much better. It was because the dinner went far better than she had expected.

Before the meal, Inaba had formally bowed and apologized to her father and to her husband for her disgraceful actions on her wedding day. She knew she had to do a formal apology to heal the rift that she felt was growing in her father's heart against her new husband. He father had suspected that Taichi had married her only for her money. It was because he believed that no man could be that selfless. He had felt it had to be a front, an act.

Her father took her apology graciously. The dinner proceeded without further incident. Inaba was happy that she saw no signs of animosity by her father towards Taichi. There was light conversation about Taichi's new position at the JRCS, their new shared apartment, and Inaba's job hunt. She told him the names of the companies that she was interviewing with. He approved her choices.

During the meal she was rather surprised when her father casually asked about Steve Anderson. Wait, how did he know that? She had told no one yet, not even Taichi.

She decided to come clean and explain her agreement to work for Steve Anderson under contract to create a track record of successful trading and to get a recommendation as a financial trader. Her father asked if she had a written agreement to that effect. She said she did. He opined that the arrangement seemed a little bit unorthodox, but he did not disapprove of it.

Inaba and Taichi were then surprised when an unexpected guest joined them for the second half of the dinner. It was a tall woman, forty-ish, with long dark purple-ish hair that framed her dark-gray eyes. She was wearing wire-rimmed glasses and business attire, and she stood tall and confident. Taichi could see that she looked rather attractive, with only a small hint of crows-feet around the corners of her eyes. Taichi and Inaba both stood to accept the new guest's bowed greeting. He noticed that she had no ring.

She introduced herself as Miyabi Sakuraba. She was the CEO of Hanabishi-Sakuraba (H-S), the textile and retail subsidiary that Inaba's father had acquired two years prior from Kaoru Honjou*, who then retired with his beautiful wife, Aoi, to travel the world as a philanthropist.

Sakuraba was a rising star in the H-S organization, and based on Honjou's recommendation Inaba's father had assigned Sakuraba as the CEO of the H-S subsidiary. It operated independently under her exceptional leadership. The firm was now one of the best performers in his keiretsu.

Inaba correctly guessed the reason for her invitation to the meal. Her father was introducing Miyabi to his daughter in the hope that she would one day become Inaba's mentor and guide when Inaba began her ascension in her father's empire.

Inaba had briefly met Sakuraba once before, at the H-S mansion during the acquisition negotiations while she was still in college. Inaba recalled that she was impressed with Sakuraba's prim and crisp efficiency, as did her father. But she could tell that Miyabi also had a hidden softer side, and she guessed that Miyabi was actually warm and personable to her friends. Inaba hoped that she would see that side of her one day.

During the dinner there was a discussion with Miyabi about the arrangements for Inaba and her friends to stay as guests at the Sakuraba mansion (now a corporate retreat) for a short-term reunion of the StuCS. Miyabi said that she would be staying with them as well for at least the first couple days until they got settled in. Inaba suspected the reason was because her father wanted to keep tabs on them.

After the dinner her father had cocktails served for them on the veranda. The two women chatted pleasantly in the corner. Miyabi explained that the reason for her coming on the trip was not at the behest of Inaba's father, but rather for a much more personal and sentimental reason: she herself wanted to show them around the mansion to explain the history and significance of the estate, and that she herself had lived there with her young charge, Aoi Sakuraba, and Aoi's suitor Kaoru Hanabishi (who lived next door in the servant's quarters). They and their close friends had all lived there for two years during Kaoru and Aoi's long and tumultuous courtship, and she had many fond memories that she wanted to share. She believed those memories would be helpful to the next young generation of close friends as they lived together in the same place.

The old western-style mansion was an excellent choice for the reunion of the Pentagon. The basement had a sizable gym, which Miyabi believed could easily be adapted as a temporary physical therapy center for Yui Kiriyama. That way her rehabilitation could continue without her leaving the estate.

Inaba had another very good reason for proposing the use of the mansion: She would not have to share a bedroom with Iori. She knew that Iori was a very observant girl, and Inaba was going to have a hard enough time trying to keep her secret from her former rival without having to also sleep in the same room with her every night.

Miyabi and Inaba drifted into a corner and were discussing the logistics of setting up the mansion for the reunion. Meanwhile, Inaba's father then took the opportunity to pull Taichi aside. He said something that surprised him.

"Please take care of my daughter. She is all I have."

Taichi's reply was simple and sincere.

"I will."

Taichi let Inaba into the apartment first. Iori and Aoki were both waiting for them.

Things began to get awkward. Until this moment, Inaba and Iori had barely seen each other. Between Kiriyama's recovery and Iori's returning to Goru, they had spent hardly any time together. It had been three and a half years since their failing out.

And in a short while they were going to be laying alone together on a shared futon.

They had never made up from their huge fight over three years ago. Neither had apologized.

Iori waved meekly. "Hey.."

Inaba was just as shy. "Hey.."

"You look good."

"So do you." Iori's bruise over her left eye had healed, and the dark circles under her eyes were gone. Inaba thought she looked well rested now, if still a bit thin.

They remained standing a few feet apart, each staring down at the floor in awkward silence.

Taichi was stationed behind Inaba. He realized he needed to coax things along. He motioned with his eyes to Aoki. The large man caught the gesture and quietly positioned himself behind Iori.

Taichi slightly nodded his head in a countdown. 3..2..1..

And then both men shoved the two women together. Iori tripped and fell into Inaba's arms with an "oof!"

Inaba was just able to keep Iori upright. She hollered, "You dumb jerks, stop it!"

The married woman then gently pulled up her former rival. "You okay? I'll kill them later."

"I'm fine, thanks."

They were now embracing each other for the first time in years.

"You know, I missed you."

"How come you never called?"

"I was waiting for you."

"And I was waiting for you."

Iori said, "We're idiots."

She was still smiling. Then she smirked.

Then Inaba smirked too. Then they both giggled. They started cracking up together.

After the laugh fit ended, Inaba asked, "Friends?"

Iori put her head on Inaba's shoulder. "Friends forever."

Inaba hugged her tightly. "I'm so sorry."

"Me too."

Iori then pulled back and looked disapprovingly at the two men. "Uh guys, do you mind?"

Taichi and Aoki took the hint and made themselves scarce.

Iori and Inaba were lying down on the large futon in the main bedroom. They were both wearing pajamas. A body pillow laid between them to mark the DMZ.

Iori was laying on her stomach on top of her blanket with her legs up. Her feet were crossing and uncrossing each other as she cracked her gum.

She propped herself up on her elbows to view Inaba over the body pillow. "Looks like you had a rough day."

"Yeah."

Iori took out her gum and stuck it behind her ear. "Tell you what. Let's just have fun tonight. No deep talk."

"Thanks."

"Just have fun. Pretend we're kids. A slumber party."

"Okay."

Iori moved away the body pillow that separated them. Then she stood up on the futon.

Inaba wondered what she was doing. "Hey.."

"Pillow fight!"

Without warning, Iori picked up and threw her pillow right at Inaba's head. She caught it with her face.

"Why you rotten.." Inaba sat up and picked up her own pillow and nailed Iori in the stomach.

Iori grabbed it and fired it back at Inaba's head again. This time Inaba dodged successfully, and in a smooth unbroken action she grabbed a second pilow with her other hand and flung it backhanded. She succeeded in knocking Iori down to her knees.

Iori fired again and missed. Inaba was just too quick. Then Iori made a malicious grin and jumped off the futon. She grabbed the sheet and yanked it hard, twirling Inaba right off the futon and onto the floor. Iori then scooped up the body pillow and dropped it lengthwise on top of Inaba, who instinctively grabbed it and held it against herself. She then started to sit up.

Then Iori yelled, "Bombs away!" and did a belly-flop right on top of the body pillow, forcing Inaba again on her back. Iori grabbed her wrists and held her down. "Gotcha!"

Inaba made a feral grin. She arched her back in an expert bridge and twisted out of Iori's hold almost effortlessly. She then flipped Iori with a camel clutch before swinging her around with a jackknife hold.

Iori was completely and expertly pinned to the floor.

Iori was stunned. "Whoa! I give up! Uncle!"

Inaba let go and grinned while panting. "I win."

Iori was amazed. "Dereban, that.. that was incredible! You pinned me down just like a pro wrestler on TV. Where in the world did you learn all those fancy moves?"

"Guess."

"Wait.. you mean..?"

"Heh."

"No way!"

"Yeah."

"Wow. How did that happen?"

"Let's clean up first."

Iori got up and helped Inaba put the bedroom back together again.

They were now laying under the covers with their heads on their pillows facing each other.

Iori simply said, "Details."

Inaba tried to explain. "You know how much of a wrestling nut Taichi is. Well, when we started sleeping together I was always the, uh, frisky one."

"Duh."

"Shush. Anyway, one day he joked that I was putting the moves on him just like a pro wrestler. As soon as he said it, it was like a lightbulb went on above our heads. So I grabbed him and ordered him to teach me some of his fancy pro wrestling moves, which he did."

"Wow, really?"

"Yeah. Oh, don't worry, it's safe. Remember, it's not real. Pro wrestling is all fake. It's choreographed. Taichi says it is like a ballet. And I gotta admit, it is totally fun."

"Woooow.."

"I'm usually the star wrestler.."

Iori caught on. ".. and Taichi is the jobber who makes the star wrestler look good! Dereban! That is so awesome!"

"Yeah. It's fun."

"And that is sooo romantic. In a weird sick twisted way, I mean." She was joking. "Still, it is totally you and Taichi."

Inaba looked up at the ceiling wistfully. "Yeah, it is."

Meanwhile Iori scanned Inaba's wan expression. "You look tired."

"I am."

"You know, it's getting late. What say we get some sleep, okay?"

"Sure."

Then Inaba turned her head. "I really missed you. I'm still sorry."

"Hey, slumber party, remember? No deep talk. Just go to sleep."

Inaba ignored her. "Iori, thanks. I really needed this."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Sleep." Iori rolled over and was instantly snoring softly.

Inaba looked up at the ceiling. She smiled inwardly. She had forgotten how good Iori was at making everyone around her feel so much at ease. Inaba felt more at peace now than at any time since the wedding.

Iori, thank you.

Inaba finally turned over and fell into a pleasant sleep.

Around 4AM Taichi quietly poked his head in to their bedroom to the check on the two of them. He saw that the two girls had forgotten to put back the body pillow for the DMZ. He smiled. Without the body pillow he saw that Inaba had rolled towards Iori. Her arm was now wrapped around Iori's waist.

Taichi recognized the body position. It was the one she normally took when sleeping with him.

He nodded to himself. Inaba was doing fine. He closed the door quietly, then he crept back to the second bedroom.

He sighed as he re-inserted his earplugs to block Aoki's snoring.

He was relieved that the two women had reconciled so quickly. Iori was probably their biggest asset in their battle against Heartseed, and he knew that if anyone could help Inaba in their fight to defeat him, it would be Iori.

He fell into a peaceful sleep.

The next day, the mini-bus pulled up to the door. Miyabi Sakuraba was the driver. She hailed the foursome and helped them load their luggage into the bus. Yui Kiriyama and her sister Anzu were already on board, sitting in the back. Aoki immediately ran down the aisle to join them.

As Miyabi drove the bus, she used the speaker system to narrate some history about the Sakuraba mansion. Originally one of the Sakuraba family's summer houses, it was built by the Sakurabas in the 1980s in the grand western style. It was modeled after the famous lodges in Glacier National Park in the United States. When the bus pulled up Taichi saw that it looked like a swiss chalet, with forest green shutters, tall dormers, and a high-pitched roof that was brick red in color. Several small balconies overlooked a lake. A small servant's building stood next door.

Taichi agreed with Inaba. It was a wonderful place for a quiet retreat.

Aoki jumped out and helped pull out the luggage. Iori and the others also got out. Anzu assisted Kiriyama on her steel arm canes to a waiting wheelchair.

Iori paused to take a good look at the great old mansion**. As she did so she nodded silently to herself.

Her mood was somber and her expression unreadable as she took in the view.

Inaba walked up beside her and asked, "Hey, you okay?"

Iori blinked, then she said. "I'm fine. Let's go explore this place. I'm sure it will be fun."

"Yeah, it looks pretty cool. Maybe we can discover a hidden secret passage behind the bookcase or something." They walked arm-in-arm towards the building.

Meanwhile, Iori continued to think about the mansion as they approached the door.

So this is it.

This is the place.

This will be the crucible.

This is where all secrets will be revealed.

This is where all truths will be told.

And by the time this is over,

The only question will be

Which of us will choose to live

And which of us will choose to die.

A/N:

* See Ai Yori Aoshi (2002-2003). In that story Kaoru Honjou's name was Kaoru Hanabishi, but in the distant finale of the manga Kaoru had legally changed his surname to that of his beloved and dearly departed mother, Honjou, who was his father's secret mistress before he died. As soon as he was of age, Kaoru had repudiated his membership in the hated Hanabishi clan after the terrible physical abuse that he had suffered as a bastard orphan child within that extended household.

Kaoru's attempt at the end of Ai Yori Aoshi to give away his legal inheritance of the Hanabishi firm to his slimy half-brother (also named Kaoru - the original Kaoru having been erased from the family's memory) had fallen through because their late grandfather's will had specifically stated that only the family member that married Aoi could inherit his estate. This was because of their grandfather's long-held desire to unite the two families to create the zaibatsu Hanabishi-Sakuraba. (This is canon.) I am assuming that he added a second stipulation that the heir must neither sell nor transfer ownership of the zaibatsu for at least 10 years. This is a rather common restriction for a family-owned business. After the 10 year period had elapsed, Kaoru sold the ownership of Hanabishi-Sakuraba to Inaba's father and became a philanthropist with his wife Aoi in their retirement.

** In Ai Yori Aoshi you can watch Miyabi's introduction of the Sakuraba mansion to Kaoru and Aoi in episode 4 ('Living Together'), starting at 10:48. The episode can be watched for free on FUNimation's channel on YouTube.

A/N Update:

I corrected a bunch of typos in this chapter and some previous ones. That really annoys me. Before I post a new chapter I always go back and carefully re-read it, like 10 times, and I still miss all the mistakes! I think it's because I've memorized the chapter as I banged it out, and then I only see what is already in my head, not on the screen.

So, dear reader, if do you spot any word omissions, transpositions, wrong homonyms, etc., please let me know so I can fix them. For example, sometimes I will omit word in a sentence, or transpose words two, or repeat an expression repeatedly. :-) The problem seems to be at the sentence level. I have no problem with spelling, and spell-check fixes that sort of thing anyway.

If you can, please PM me if you spot any errors in this (or any other) chapter, and my kitties and I will be very grateful to you. Thanks again for reading.

-HuuskerDu