Emily stood in front of a beautiful polished oak desk, her hands holding onto each other tightly in front of her as she watched the dark-haired, pretty Kiomi Takada read the fake job application. Well, half of it was fake, anyways. Her name, of course had been changed to Shi Takashima for the time being when she was out in public. (She reported to have had a Japanese foster parent who, upon adopting "Shi", had changed her name.) Other things that had been changed was the photo, which, in all reality, was of her mother, but the family resemblance was so great that upon glancing at the picture, you were sure that it was the 19 year old girl standing before smiled to herself briefly, feeling accomplished that it had been her who had thought of her name (renewing her old nickname, Death, into Japanese) and of using her mother's photo. Her heart gave a slight squeeze, shoving and scolding Emily, "You're using your mother! You should be honoring her, not using her for something illegal!" Emily knew this, but she hissed to herself, snarling, for the fifth time that morning, "I'm helping Mello. I'm taking down Kira. I'm obediently helping the man I love bring a murderer to justice. Mother would be proud of so!"
Apparently, her stern expression she had been giving herself had been brought to Takada's attention as she chuckled, "What's with the face? You're perfect for the job- finally, my guard has been completed." She smiled smugly to herself, crediting her sharp eye and mind for finding the last of her personal guard/assistants. Emily also smiled, a smile that looked to Takada as being grateful, but behind the smile hid a satisfaction at getting the desired job-as well as a position as a news reporter, a position that Takada had herself vacated in favor of being Kira's mouthpiece- and disgust for the woman who had just hired her. The woman was so conceited! She expected everyone to cater to her, just because Kira had chosen her. Emily felt her lips almost curl into a pitying, mocking smile at the woman who had turned a blind eye to what Kira had done. Such a waste. Despite that, Emily smiled all the same, bowing at the waist as she murmured a thank you, stepping out into the hall, sending a quick text to Amy, Matt and Mello, reporting what had just went on, and shifting her bag on a more comfortable position for her shoulder, she exited, anxious to run home and spend the rest of the day in a well deserved place- Mello's arms.
Mello stepped up to his apartment door, glancing around, unconsciously looking for anyone suspicious who may have been following him. Seeing and hearing no one, he unlocked the door, stepping inside, realizing that Emily was also in the apartment as he saw her coat on the rack and her laptop bag flung on the floor, as well as hearing her singing some kind of song. Mello smirked softly, his eyes now holding a mischievous look, a look that differed from his usual stern or livid expression as he made his way to Emily, following the sound of her voice as she continued to sing.
Emily stood before the bathroom mirror, taking out her earrings, grateful that they were no longer pinching her ears, that her high heels were off, and her sore feet could relax. Emily sang under her breath, murmuring, "Last Christmas, I gave you my heart..." as she started washing her face free of any makeup. She sighed as she finished her task, taking her hairband out, shaking her hair loose, and thinking about how little time she had left. To be with Mello and to help him...he was running out of time to live. She was running out of time to love him. She bit her lip, wondering if she was going to survive without him. Emily knew that she had lived without BB, albeit scared and alone, with so much pain for her then. However, BB and Mello were two different people, two different cases entirely. Emily had thought of Beyond as a father figure, as someone to depend on. Mello was also someone she depended on as well, but Mello...was her love. Her protector. She bit her lip, wondering, wondering...
She was unaware of the fact that Mello was sneaking up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist as she had looked down at the sink, catching her off guard while she squealed, laughing at the same time. "Mello! You scared me!" She mumbled, putting a hand on his cheek and smiling. Mello leaned forward and kissed her cheek, muttering, "I know."
Emily turned to face him, knowing that she was trapping herself between the bathroom counter and Mello himself. Smiling up at him, she mumbled, "You got my text, right? About me getting the job?" Mello smirked, nodding and tightening his grip on her waist as he muttered, "I knew that you would be able to get it. I knew it." Emily moved her hands to her hair as she smoothed it nervously, shaking out her hair as she asked, "Where's Matt and Amy? I thought they'd be here by now..." "They're Christmas shopping ...or some crap like that." Mello rolled his eyes, wondering what had so possessed Matt, who usually hated any shopping mall or store (unless it was a GameStop), to go shopping-voluntarily- with Amy.
Emily saw his eye-roll and she laughed. "Yeah, unbelievable, right? Who knew that Matt would be able to shop without threatening suicide?" Mello simpered before frowning slightly. Emily's eyes widened as she realized what she had just said as she bit her lip, whispering, "I...I didn't mean ...anything...by it. I mean..." Emily felt tears forming in her eyes as she thought about how Matt and Mello would be dead in at least a month and how lost she and Amy would be when they were gone. How alone and hurt they would be. She swallowed the lump in her throat as she forced herself to stop thinking pessimistically, not noticing how tight Mello's grip had gotten when she had trailed off and that he had hoisted her onto the counter, looking up into her eyes and face as she tried to turn her head away, ashamed that she was crying in front of him. "It doesn't matter...It's nothing." Mello frowned, furrowing his eyebrows as he leaned forward, his hand grabbing her chin, forcing her to look at him. Emily struggled against his grip for a moment, trying to pull Mello's hands away so she could avoid his gaze. She gave up, sighing as she let herself stare at Mello, despite the tears clouding her eyes.
"Obviously it's something if you're crying about it." Mello exclaimed, watching her gaze at her knees as she mumbled, "Maybe it is, but...it's not important." She cleared her throat, wiping her eyes as she smiled at Mello the best she could, saying, "See? All better." Mello still frowned, muttering, "You'd think that you'd start crying more before hugging me and saying something like 'I can't believe you're going to die soon!' or some crap like that..." Mello trailed off as Emily kissed him, muttering to him, "Please shut up...I'm not about to be a cliché." Mello chuckled, rolling his eyes before kissing her back, stepping away afterward and saying, "I'll let you finish your business."
Emily smiled at him as he left, turning back to the mirror and sighing sadly. She hated showing Mello her feelings-her thoughts...her regrets. He didn't deserve to see those kinds of things now...He didn't deserve anything like that. She slowly sank to her knees, clasping her hands as she started to pray, a practice she hadn't done in a while, having had little to no time to do so...She flushed with shame at the realization that she had practically chucked her faith in God and religion into the wastebasket years ago. Yet she found herself on her knees, ready to pray at the possibly worst moment of her life...Maybe she had mistaken the recycling bin for the wastebasket. Still, she prayed, mouthing the words as she clutched unto her rosary as if it was the only life preserver that had been tossed to her.
"God...Jesus...whoever in heaven that's listening...Please...please...PLEASE ...help me...I-I can't keep Mello safe and happy by myself...I can't help him as much as I want to and I don't know what else I can do for him...I can't give anything else to him..." Well I could but I rather like being a virgin... Emily thought, biting her lip before she continued her prayer. "I know that he's running out of time and that I probably am too...but still...I want the rest of his life to be the best it can be. Please. You've answered my prayers once by giving him to me...please answer my prayer again." Emily thought briefly back to the night she had returned to L.A. from Wammy's and remembered praying for a protector and someone to love and help her heart back together...Mello had saved her six months later. "Please, God. Help me...Amen."
It was as she unfolded her hands did she realize that a fresh batch of tears had started streaking her face like small raindrops. Surrendering to the weakness, Emily sat against the bathroom wall, sobbing her heart out, not noticing Mello's reappearance in the doorway. He stared at her, eyebrow cocked, before her knelt in front of her, whispering, "You're crying again." Emily nodded, hiccupping through her tears as she wiped one of her eyes free of tears as she answered, "It's hard not to when I know how little time you have left. You said...not to do anything reckless and stuff...but even you aren't following that rule...so why should I? I mean, really, nowadays...you're taking so many darn risks...and you're not thinking about yourself and what will happen after you die..." She sniffled before continuing, "When you die...I don't know what I'd do! I don't want you to die!" She tried to say more, but her sobs prevented her.
Mello sighed, giving her a bitter smile before taking her into his arms, muttering to her, "I have been reckless, true, but you can't say that I haven't been thinking ahead, even though I won't be around to see it..." "Don't talk like that right now, Mello. Please. Right now...don't talk like that." Emily interrupted, slightly pained before falling silent urging Mello to continue. Mello smirked, kissing her forehead, saying, "You can't expect me not to talk about it, y'know... me dying upsets you the most. I know that. Leaving you...ughh..." Mello gritted his teeth, his dislike for saying sappy things showing as he said, "Is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done. But I'm going to. I know that if I can't be number one in Near's eyes...if I can't catch Kira...I'll know that I was always number one...even if it was only for you. Only you."
Emily stared up at him, surprised, her tears slowly stopping as she closed her eyes, thinking about their times together. How much they had matured...She had only been 14 when Mello had forced his way into her life; he had only been 15...and how much they had learned in those four years together...and how short those years now seemed. She bit her lip, thinking. Mello...you're such a sweet liar when you want to try to save me from the painful truth...you've always tried to spare me from reality...you've always protected me...even in Wammy's, when I thought you didn't care...you did. Even then, you guarded me from bad things...If only I had seen that then. You deserve everything I have...even if I don't want to give it up...I kinda do... Emily opened her eyes, knowing that it was her time to be reckless, to do something that could end badly...
She was going to give herself away...She was going to give up all her remaining chastity...
Her grip tightened on Mello, her heart drumming fast in her chest, hoping she wouldn't lose her determination and courage. "Mello...I know that...one of these days you're going to tell me to find someone else to love, to forget that you ever existed...but I know that I won't be able to. I love you more than I loved anyone else ever in this world...I want to become yours. Make me yours tonight. Please." Mello's eyes widened as he tried to formulate a response...but he was nearly speechless. Emily quickly filled the silence by stuttering, "I-I know the consequences and I understand if you don't want to and all..." She didn't finish-Mello had silenced her by having his lips meet hers passionately, picking her up and carrying her to their bedroom, plopping her on the bed as he locked the door. When he turned to look at her again, Emily noticed the smug smile on his lips as he muttered, "I knew you had a reckless side in you." Emily did nothing, only smiled, only wondered-for a flicker of a second- if she was making the right choice. It didn't matter now as Mello joined her on the bed, their clothes falling on the floor, and their bodies began to rise and fall together, cries of ecstasy and pain mingling in the moonlit room as two scarred souls became one, as their wounds were stitched up to where it felt like the wounds had never been there in the first place, stitching up just enough for them to live comfortably for the rest of their time together.
Mello...if ...if I had never met you...if my life had been the perfect I once wished for...I...would have never known...pain...sadness...anger...embarrassment...fear...happiness...pleasure...I would have never known of love. I would have never known what it means to really love someone. It's bittersweet and it hurts a lot sometimes...but I've never cared this much about someone...Thank you...even if this will be our only time together like this...even if this is possibly our last real time together at all...I can say that you taught me- and loved me- so much more than I ever knew. Thank you.
That was all Emily thought as she fell asleep, listening to Mello's heartbeat, wishing that that moment would never end...
*reads this chapter again* ...I feel...like a pervert.
I apologize for this chapter, I really do! o