Rumpelstiltskin told himself as he stood at the edge of the playground that this was simply self-defense. And when he couldn't fool even himself to buy that excuse, he shoved his guilt and his fear to the back of his mind and watched his grandson swing.

There were sharp rocks nearby. Any child could…fall and injure themselves.

Accidents happened all the time. This would be no different. He couldn't be blamed if the rope was frayed to the point of snapping. And they wouldn't even suspect him. If they suspected magic at work, then they would blame Regina. After all, she had already proven with Graham that if her toy couldn't be hers, then it couldn't be anyone's. And it was a fitting punishment in his mind. Why in the name of the gods were they STILL letting that boy be unsupervised anywhere with what Regina had tried to pull countless times?

So, he was taking care of two things at once. He was protecting himself and he was protecting the town.

'Undoing' could mean anything.

But why should he take chances? What if it was his life?

And what if it was his magic? Why should he lose it? He kept the town safe from Regina. It was the only thing he had left.

When he first started this, he knew when to limit himself. He told himself he was just trying to gain Lacey's favor but now….

He was going too far as he watched the ropes fray and he knew it and he just didn't care.

The slamming of a nearby truck door brought him back to reality. He looked over and saw Charming, Snow, and Emma.

Oh gods…

"Gold," Charming said, "What're you doing here?"

"Well my son made it clear to stay away from him," Rumpelstiltskin lied easily, "So, I'm spending some time with my grandson instead."

Snow looked at her daughter, "Why don't you go talk to Henry, and we'll handle this."

They waited for Emma to walk away before Snow started talking, "Mr. Gold, we have some news to share with you and it's not good."

And what problem did they need him to solve today? "Not interested."

"It's about your son."

Rumpelstiltskin refused to become interested, "Yeah, what about him?"

Charming drew a small breath, "Tamara shot him."

Rumpelstiltskin stopped and a beat passed as he absorbed what Charming said before he turned around and waited for them to finish the story but they were silent and he knew "What?...he's dead?"

Gods, no, no, no…..

He had brought all of them here to get his son back and now he was just gone? Oh gods and he didn't even get to say that he was…that he was sorry for everything he'd done...

He remembered the last words of anger they shared. Words they'd never be able to take back because he was so stupid and stubborn.

Bae was dead? No…he could…he should be able to sense his son was dead somehow and he couldn't….

"They used a bean to open a portal; Neal was hurt…so badly that he fell through…"

The air was driven from Rumpelstiltskin's lungs as he realized all of this…had been for nothing. Gods, he had felt something wasn't right about that woman the minute he laid eyes on her and she killed his son?

"He's gone," Charming whispered.

Rumpelstiltskin recoiled backwards. His son…had a family of his own that he would never see grow…

That Rumpelstiltskin was ready to kill, oh gods, what had he nearly done?

"Bae wasn't supposed to die," he whispered and he felt like such a small child when he said it out loud…more to himself than them.

"Greg and Tamara…they took something from Regina, a magical trigger-."

Rumpelstiltskin felt like he was going to throw up while Charming kept yammering. His son was dead….his boy was dead and Tamara hadn't even given him the chance to say his goodbyes to his son because of the portal. His boy, that he spent centuries looking for was gone, and they were worried about a trigger? Couldn't they let him have a few moments to grieve? He understood they had no time, but surely a few moments…

"If they activate it, it's a self-destruct…everyone not born of this world will die."

Charming stared at him, "I know this is hard but we need your help."

And there it was. When they weren't treating him like a feral dog, they were groveling to him for the favors he could offer…even the news of his son's death came with a deal attached and he couldn't…he couldn't. No more magic. No more deals…he was just so tired of it all. It'd all been for nothing. Perhaps he would save them today…but there would be a price tomorrow and then the day after that and the price would be…catastrophic.

No, he was ending it now.

"No," he barely managed to choke out and moved away from them.

"They killed your son in cold blood and you don't want to stop them?"

"They didn't kill my son," Rumpelstiltskin whispered, "I did. I brought magic to this world to find Bae and now he's dead….magic always has a price and this is it…"

Gods, this was all his fault. He had played with magic and played with nature and now everyone would be punished for his selfishness.

Bae was dead.

"But I'm prepared to pay it," he whispered…

Charming looked shocked and horrified.

"But," Snow stepped in, "We'll die, you'll die."

He thought of Lacey…who was not Belle no matter how hard he imagined she was…and he thought of his ex-wife whose prolonged life only seemed to bring her misery because of him…

And he thought of his daughter who would grow up without her parents. Perhaps that was for the best. He could make arrangements to the outside world for her to be taken care of…her and Henry both. The children would be fortunate to escape and grow up without this madness surrounding them….

"Yeah," he whispered, "I've made my peace with that."

Their terrified faces were the last thing he stared at before he turned around and stumbled away in shock

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Once Upon a Time

The boy was awake when Killian went below to question him. The idea was quite simple really…find out if he was useful and then if he wasn't or his information could be taken from him then they'd just throw him to the lost ones.

It was nothing personal, just survival.

"Ahoy there," he greeted to get the boy's attention, "Aren't you lucky to be alive?"

"Lucky?" The boy asked and looked as if his entire world was crumbling, "I'm a prisoner of pirates in a land cursed with magic."

Figures he'd get stuck with the odd one. But at least he didn't have to convince him like the other children needed convincing about what this land really was, "Most children think they've found paradise when they lay their eyes on Neverland's magic."

Well, at least at first. Once he'd watched the children try to escape towards his boat before they were dragged back away by the lost ones.

"Why else would you come in the first place?"

The boy wouldn't look at him, "I came so the family I loved could live."

Killian leaned forward…he wasn't sure if he was mocking or commending the boy because he had seen from his spyglass what these children suffered through. If this boy had taken another boy's place then it was both bravery and stupidity, "Well, aren't you quite the hero?"

He moved in front of the boy.

"What would you know about that?" the boy demanded, and then spit out the last words like they were a curse, "Pirate."

Immediately Killian took the defensive and pointed his hook at the boy to intimidate him and remind him who had the power, "A pirate saved your scrawny bones from the curse of the mermaids."

The boy glared at him, "A pirate took my mother and tried to tear apart my family."

And that was the opening Killian needed to find out what he needed to know, "What about your father?"

The boy's eyes took an almost traumatized as his mind went into his past, "He left me…he's a coward."

And then something clicked for Killian as he stared at the boy. It wasn't just the fate of his mother being taken by pirates…that happened all the time. It wasn't just his father being a coward….and it wasn't just the haunted look in the boy's eyes that was so similar to…

Was this the son of Dagian and the Dark One? No, it couldn't be…fate had a funny way of working but it never made things that easy. But all the pieces fit; He had taken Dagian and she had once said something about how her husband was a coward in the eyes of society. That was pretty much all she said. Getting her to talk about her husband and son was like pulling teeth. She didn't like giving any clues on who they might be.

And that look in the boy's eyes…he'd seen that in her once they'd taken her…and now that he looked, there was some resemblance…

No, it was his mind playing tricks. This could not be the son of the Ice Queen and the Dark One.

And all he had to do was ask his name. He knew it. Dagian yelled it once in her sleep. She screamed out apologies to him and Rumpelstiltskin. That was when he was stupid enough to go to her side and wake him up. And she, in a terrified state while sleeping, punched him in the face. He was smarter than that afterwards. He stood in the doorway when she started screaming and talked her down from her nightmare and the crew didn't speak of it though every land in 80 miles could more than likely hear her.

What was his name? It was an odd one…something from the front lands…Beautide...Beaureguard….no those were stupid.

Baelfire, that's what it was.

"What's your name boy?" he asked.

The boy looked up, "I don't have to answer to you!"

Oh, tough talk coming from a boy in his pajamas.

Killian drew back in mock fear and widened his eyes before he got bored, "Well, I can make you….but to prove that not all pirates are as you fear…I'll simply ask again…."

He drew closer to the boy's face. It was an intimidation tactic that his father often used with him and prisoners on the ship, "What's your name?"

The boy weighed his options and looked at him with a small hint of fear, "Baelfire."

As recognition dawned on him, he slowly backed away to a more respectable distance. There was always a part of him…a very small part that regretted what he'd put the Ice Queen through for a monthly payment for her care. He wasn't much in favor of holding women on his ship against their will for ransom. His father had done that and he remembered the terror those ladies went through. The only reason Killian had agreed to take the lady in was because he didn't want to give away such an easy monetary asset to another pirate that would treat her far more horribly. He didn't deny that he could've treated her better but there were times where he tried to talk to her like a civilized gentleman. How did she repay him? Through her own sass and angry words and shunning. So what else was he supposed to do?

So perhaps by taking in this boy, he could atone for what he did and what he put her through…as well as get some of his own back. Rumpelstiltskin had taken his hand because of that Ice Queen and slaughtered his crew; his family! The men that raised him.

He wondered how the Ice Queen and Dark One would feel if they knew he was raising their son because something happened that made them lose him.

It was hitting two birds with one stone really. All he had to do was keep the boy from the Lost Ones.

Quietly, he grabbed another blanket for the boy and handed it to him, "Welcome aboard, Baelfire. It's a pirate's life for you."

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 00000000000

Present Day

Killian couldn't believe this. Less than twenty people were deciding the fate of every man and woman and child based on the fact that these supposed heroes wanted to save the psychopath that brought out the failsafe in the first place.

Well, he had helped with that, but he highly doubted anyone in the room except Emma would volunteer to save him.

The princess's father threw her the bag and he caught it before she could, "You're all mad!"

They had a chance to get home. They had a chance to save everyone. So what if it was built on Regina's blood? That's how civilizations were always built. On other people's blood.

He moved to the corner and slipped the bean into his pocket where they couldn't see, "I can live with myself-."

"Give it back!" Emma demanded.

"If she wants to die for us, I say let her."

Because if Regina lived, then they'd all just wish they'd let her die soon anyway. How long would it be until she betrayed them? She just shoved him down a ravine to fight a…whatever Maleficent was now. And he'd never done anything to her!

"You and I-," Emma started, "We understand each other…look after yourself and you'll never get hurt, right?"

"Always worked quite well for me," he muttered.

"Yeah, until the day that it doesn't," Emma snapped, "We're doing this. It might be stupid, it might be crazy, but we're doing it."

And she was going to let thousands of people die in the process. Killian wasn't going to take that risk. He had helped them acquire this bean. He forsook his revenge against Rumpelstiltskin to get the bean and save all of them and he was not going to let that bean be wasted by people that thought they spoke for everyone.

"You can join us…and be a part of something," Emma continued, "Or you can do what you do best and be alone."

He wouldn't be. He could always find anyone he wanted away from all this insanity in another world.

He gave her the empty pouch, "Quite passionate, Swan."

The others moved away but Emma kept staring at him.

"Why are you really doing this?" he demanded.

"The kid just lost his father today; I'm not letting him lose a mother too.'

Well now her decision was going to cost her son all of them…even if he gave the bean back and they used it for the failsafe…they would all die.

And Hook had spent too long surviving.

"His father?" he asked curiously, "Who's Henry's father?"

Emma looked at him like she couldn't believe he didn't already know, "Neal."

Neal…the other name that Baelfire had used…the one that his betrothed called him…

It felt like a punch to the gut. The boy had already been through so much thanks to his parents and thanks to him, "Baelfire…."

He was one of the innocent ones that Killian truly didn't want to hurt because he reminded him so much of himself at that age and now he was…gone? How?

Emma clutched the small sack to her chest like it was the only thing that was helping her hold herself together, "Yeah."

He stood there…stunned as Emma walked out.

Baelfire…the boy he had raised for three months and had…connected to was dead and for some reason, Hook knew he was partially to blame for that. He didn't know the specifics, but he could tell that Greg and Tamara had something to do with it.

He couldn't just run away and let everyone in Bae's family die.

Originally, he had forced Dagian aboard the ship because he had seen her outside the borders and he knew that she could escape. So he attacked her from behind and forced her on the boat so that she wouldn't be able to leave the destruction. However now it was different…he could at least save her and her baby.

For Bae's memory.

Because while he might try and save Bae's boy too…there was no way that he'd be able to get ahold of him without at least eight people jumping on him. So he would make due with the family that he could get to.

Anyway, with all the trouble that Dagian did bring with her…she was somewhat intelligent. She wasn't like them no matter how much she tried to fit in. She only found out about them being family when everyone else did. She didn't owe them anything. She would see sense.

She would want the chance to raise her daughter.

And while she probably wouldn't make the best companion on the ship, she did know enough about it to help him.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 0000000000

Dagian wasn't picking up her phone.

Jefferson tried again for the eightieth time. She always picked up her phone or she messaged him to let him know that she was alright. She'd gone into the woods after Greg and she let him know where she'd be…

And then there was nothing and he knew that something was wrong. He tried to call Emma but she wasn't picking up either…

He'd tried to keep an eye on the woods but he lost sight of her pretty quickly.

Gods, where was she?

Had Greg attacked her or shot her? Yeah, he doubted that, he was pretty sure that Dagian could take that wimp out.

But Tamara…she might be able to pack a punch and she'd headed in the same direction that Dagian and Greg had headed into. They hadn't brought her out of the woods, but they could've hurt or killed her.

He tried Emma's phone again but there was no answer. He wouldn't even have her number if it wasn't for Dagian giving it to him in case something happened to her. She'd felt safer that way. Especially when she found out Hook was back.

Well, what good was that now?

The earth shook and he heard Grace screaming for him upstairs. Automatically he turned and started running up the stairs. He needed to get her and the baby out of here…maybe he could get them to the beach…the town was going insane, people would be stampeding…

And he'd looked in the telescope earlier. He wasn't sure why there were vines growing everywhere but he was not taking them through town.

"PAPA!"

At the sound of his daughter screaming for her, he ran faster and burst into the room.

Grace looked at him frantically, "Papa, its Lily! I came to get her to leave and She-."

Jefferson moved over to his daughter and looked at the cradle that was supposed to hold the baby.

She was gone.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 00000

Once Upon A Time

Baelfire was on Killian's ship for three months. And every day, Killian knew the risk he was running by keeping the boy under his protection.

He knew because Smee never shut up about it.

"Captain," Smee said and came up behind him, "Why is Baelfire still aboard the Jolly Roger? The boy has given you a path to revenge, but you can't walk that path if you're dead."

Killian didn't pretend to believe Smee cared one bit about him and his revenge. He was fully aware that the only reason this… connoisseur of rare objects nagged him so much about it was because he was only looking out for himself. He had no loyalties to Killian other than the fact that Killian was giving him eternal life (gods, he wasn't looking forward to the centuries that might be spent on this ship evading the shadow). Killian had captured him and waved a choice under Smee's nose that honestly…wasn't really a choice.

Much like he had with Dagian, but at least Dagian was much more appealing to look at. She wasn't breathtaking like so many others had been but she was still miles better looking than Smee was. Even her constant daily rants weren't as tiresome…but maybe that monthly reward for keeping her contained had something to do with it. He wondered how quickly he'd have tired of their little game if she didn't come with a price attached.

He almost wondered what it'd have been like if he'd been able to keep Dagian aboard with him all this time…and in the small chance Rumpelstiltskin didn't take her off the boat as soon as he got his power…he wondered what it would've been like if she had accompanied them to Neverland and met her son in these circumstances.

Of course she'd probably have clawed Smee's eyes out the minute he suggested turning Baelfire over.

"Careful," he cautioned, "Smee."

He wanted to say that protecting the boy was just him paying his debt to Dagian but there was a bit more to it. He'd…honestly come to care for the boy. Maybe not as if he were his own but he couldn't deny there was some sort of paternal bond there that might be explored.

"Captain," Smee pleaded, "You know quite well that he is after the boy…if you don't surrender Baelfire to him, th-th-the lost ones will take him anyway and kill you."

And Killian finally lost his patience. Smee was a deckhand; he truly didn't know how the ranking order worked if he thought he could speak to him like this, "I'm the captain, I GIVE THE ORDERS! And anyone who disobeys can walk the plank and pray that the mermaids take pity on his soul."

He climbed down the stairs while he screamed that. He saw from the corner of his eye, Baelfire coming up from below. At first he thought that Baelfire might be coming up to see what the commotion was. For all the bumbling idiotic things Smee did, he did have the sense not to talk about turning Bae over in front of him.

And then he saw the sword as Baelfire ran at him, "Face me, villain."

He tried to swing the sword and Killian moved backwards with ease.

"Captain!" one of the deckhands shouted.

"Whoa," he held his hand up before they could hurt the boy. When they sheathed their swords, he focused back on Baelfire, "Now what's this all about Bae?"

Baelfire held up a dark red faded shawl with a name stitched in it; he recognized it as Dagian's. She'd had it when he brought her on here and he'd kept it as a reminder all these years that the Dark One would come calling since he lost her.

Well he didn't exactly need it since the Dark One took all his family from him and his hand but…he had never gotten around to throwing it out.

"I found this…on your desk chair," Bae looked down at it and pain crossed his face, "It was my mother's…how did you get it?"

And Killian knew he was about to destroy this boy's world, when he confessed that he was part of the reason why Baelfire didn't have a mother for fourteen years, "Bae-."

"How?" Baelfire demanded and swung again. Killian easily dodged it.

"You're the pirate that took her!" Baelfire screamed and tried to swing again. It was wide and sloppy and he quickly blocked it with his hook and wrenched it from Bae's hands.

"Yes," he admitted, "I took your mother. The Dark One paid me to. He told me she might go to worse men that might harm her if I didn't take the job. I took her on board and watched over her until another man that wasn't your father came to get her. And then when he won her in a duel, the Dark One came and took her memories and any desire to see you or your father again. I had nothing to do with that…and for my part, your father came and slaughtered my entire crew; My family after I kept her safe! Now I've spent every moment wanting revenge."

"She wanted to come back to us. She was sorry she abandoned us."

"Your mother spent every day wanting to get back to you, Baelfire. She even almost escaped once because she wanted to get to you both and warn you about the Dark One having plans for your father. I never wanted to hurt her or your family; I took the job because I thought you'd be reunited one day. And since then I wanted to make atonement for what I did to your family and perhaps fate brought us together so that I could make good on those plans. I can take care of you in atonement for what I put your mother through."

"No!" Baelfire moved away, "Stay back! You used me! You wanted to kill my father!"

"Yes," Killian admitted, "I did."

"You tore apart my family," Baelfire cried as he realized the life he might have had if not for the external forces that constantly ripped them apart.

"Bae don't-," Killian pleaded.

"Take me back to my real family," Baelfire demanded, "-the Darlings"

That had struck him far deeper than what he was willing to admit, "I-I-I can't."

Bae wouldn't look at him and he knew his chance of getting the boy's alliance was gone but he tried anyway, "It's not possible to leave Neverland, but you can stay here under my protection."

"I'd rather fend for myself than be with you," Baelfire hissed, "I want off this ship, pirate."

The boy walked away from him.

And so it was done. Just like that.

Killian had only counted himself close to the crew. They were his family. Most were the men that had served under his father and raised him but there was always that sort of…distance from them. None of them had come to his aide when his father beat him senseless. They just looked in fear towards his father and told him it was the way of the sea and then they'd try to distract him.

But this boy…he had grown connected with him. He had seen enough of himself in the boy to form a bond that was far beyond revenge and atonement.

Or rather he would have…

He made the decision to turn the boy over to the lost ones for several reasons. One of which was to keep his reputation amongst the crew, the other was because he knew the boy would be captured by the lost ones anyway and so he sent a message to them because doing so would secure his own survival and that of his crew's.

But in the end, he knew he did it because Baelfire had hurt him, and in his blind hurt rage….he looked to strike Bae back harder. Because he was a pirate who was used to getting what he wanted. That was the way things were done on the sea.

And it was something he would regret for centuries.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 0000

Present Day

Dagian's arms went numb about two hours ago but she still struggled to get the shackles loose. There was an exposed nail in the room and shoved her cuff against it in an attempt to get the shackles open. It was an easier task said than done. Dagian couldn't see and she kept scratching herself against the pointed nail. She really hoped that…Dawn got her tetanus shots….

She strained against the chain again and felt the earth shake. What in the name of the gods was going on out there?

She strained against the chain again when she heard the sound of boots in the hallway outside. Dagian felt her heart start to race. The last time they had really…interacted, he'd shoved a hook in her back and threatened to kill her daughter.

Dagian looked up as the footsteps got louder and made her face unemotional before he got inside, "more fun and games?"

She looked up to look him dead in the eyes and then she froze when she saw her daughter in his arms. Oh gods…oh gods what did he do? Why- why did he-?

She looked at her daughter and then looked at him. She wanted to lunge at him. She wanted to strain against these chains and call him every foul name she could but good sense overrode that. He had Lily and she was bound…he had the advantage and she knew that anything she did might get Lily hurt.

"Killian….please….don't hurt my daughter," she begged, "Please, you can do anything you want to me….but please don't hurt her."

"I didn't bring your daughter here to hurt her, love," he said quietly and placed Lily on the small bed. Dagian looked up to see something dark in his eyes, "Dagian, there's something you need to know."

He pulled out the keys and she watched him carefully as he picked the key and hesitated. He sensed Dagian would attack him the minute her hands were free and now that her daughter was here, he was probably guessing right.

"Dagian," he moved closer and took her shoulders, "Baelfire….there was…a fight and something happened."

She knew it immediately from the way he was looking at her and she felt the shock slam into her and her eyes filled with tears, "No…."

Killian managed to look up at her, she was terrified that he was lying to mess with her but he wasn't so great of an actor as one that could pull this off, "He's been killed Dagian."

The tears spilled down her face and she stumbled back a few steps, "How?"

"I don't know," he unlocked her chains and watched them fall to the ground.

And Dagian shoved him backwards, "You did this!"

"I did not," he told her, "I never touched your son and if I'd known that Greg and Tamara would do to him then I certainly wouldn't help."

Bae was supposed to be safe here! They were supposed to be a family! They were supposed to work on fixing the problems they all had. They were supposed to bon and protect each other. Her son…he was…

No, he wasn't dead, he couldn't be. A mother was supposed to be able to sense these things…"

Then why was she crying?

Dagian felt her shoulders fall and she started sobbing. All this….all the centuries and work Rumpelstiltskin had put in to get their son back…all the scheming and manipulation…

And Bae was dead…

Well that should be the price, shouldn't it? The lives he ruined and she gave her blessing to ruin when she told him to do whatever it took to get Bae….

All for nothing.

But that was the price, wasn't it? And it was a fitting one. Everything they did, why should they get the son they fought so hard for? Why did they deserve him?

And like it always did, evil cost the life of the innocents and Bae was the price of their punishment.

Dagian felt her legs go out from under her and she collapsed to the ground.

Her son was dead.

Killian knelt down and put his hand on her shoulder, "I'm sorry."

She automatically pulled away at his touch and scooted back away from him.

Tamara and Greg were responsible for her son's death…

Killian held something in his hand and looked down at her as she cried, "I'll give you some time alone."

He swept out of the room.