Chapter five: Good Bye

"Rin..."

Rin turned after his voice.

"Yes, my lord?"

"I would like to talk to you."

"OK!"

Rin ran to him, as he was slowly walking into the forest. She was wondering, while looking at him, where would they go to this time. Naraku - lord Sesshomaru's biggest enemy so far - had been defeated. And lord Sesshomaru wouldn't just stay here. She was sure he was about to move somewhere else, most probably a very, very distant place. She smiled with excitement. There wasn't a thing in the world she would like more than travelling with him. And with master Jaken of course.

"Do you like the woman, Kaede?" lord Sesshomaru asked all of the sudden.

"Uh... yes, she's a kind old lady..." Rin agreed. Lord Sesshomaru grunted silently.

"Did you see her house?"

"Yes. Reminds me of my family house," Rin said, caressing the tips of the grass while walking. "Although our house was bigger because I had so many brothers."

Lord Sesshomaru was looking straight ahead, only the upper part of his face was visible, the rest hidden behind his mokomoko.

"I wanted to know," he continued, "if you don't mind the woman. And the place she stays at."

"Why would I?" Rin asked. "Is there something wrong with her?"

"No, nothing," lord Sesshomaru said.

"So..." Rin gave him a look. "Where are we going this time, my lord?"

He stopped, his eyes still. He breathed in deeply, hesitating and frowning.

"You will stay here, Rin, "he said then. "With the old woman."

Rin raised an eyebrow.

"So you're going somewhere where it's dangerous and will come to pick me up later?"

"Not this time. You won't travel with me any more."

Rin's eyes widened in shock. She felt her heart had almost stopped. No, that couldn't be... He didn't mean it. He couldn't do it... He couldn't leave her!

"No, lord Sesshomaru! No, please! Please, don't leave me!"

He lowered his head, glaring at the ground, his eyes narrowed.

"Don't argue with me, Rin. These are my final words."

"Why?!" she cried out, hot tears filling her eyes.

"It's the best for you," he said. "The village is a proper place. It's not right for a human girl to live with me like that."

"That's not true! I don't want to stay here! I want to go with you! I want to be with you! Please!"

She was crying from the deep of her heart, looking at him with urge and despair, while the demon remained turned away, not moving a muscle. It seemed like the sun disappeared. It felt like the warm summer air changed into cold and freezing. Shadows embraced them.

"Stop, Rin," he said after her tearful pleading. "I've decided already."

The resolution in his voice killed all her hopes. She stooped her shoulders and bowed her head. The tears wouldn't stop falling on the grass as she was crying her heart out. In the back of her mind she knew lord Sesshomaru had still been standing there. But there were no words to say. No more things to do. Nothing. He rejected her. He pushed her away. So she had been a burden to him after all.

The image of him leaving and not coming back was so horrible it froze Rin where she stood. She didn't want to move. It was like making a step would confirm all that he told her was really true.

"It's all my fault," she whispered. "If I weren't such a burden... Stupid, stupid, Rin..."

The demon lord moved, his steps inaudible. She felt as he placed a hand on her head, careful not to hurt her with his claws. She looked up, meeting his eyes.

"Why do you want to get rid of me?" she asked.

"I don't. If I could, I would keep you by my side."

"I'm afraid..."

"Afraid of what?"

"Afraid you will forget me... and leave me... and that I won't see you again..."

Tears started running down her face again. He noticed it with a hint of guilt, brushing them softly away with his fingers.

"I could never forget you," he said.

"But... I need you..."

"I will always be there when you need me, Rin," he said, and this time his voice was firm. "I will always be there for you. Remember it."

She didn't move her eyes from him, watching him pleadingly.

"And this doesn't mean we won't see each other," he added. "I can visit you if you want."

She breathed in shakily.

"Really? How often?"

"As often as possible. If that's what you wish."

Rin calmed down, although the weigh of sorrow was still upon her shoulder, she felt better.

"Just promise... you won't leave me behind."

"I promise," he said, a strange expression forming on his face and he muttered to himself almost unwittingly: "One day I may feel the same fear..."

Rin shook her head violently.

"Never, I could never forget you, my lord! Never ever!"

He stared down at her, contemplatively, before giving her a soft smile. His distant and cold face changed with the smile beyond recognition, a side of him he saved exclusively for her. There were both relief and indulgence in his eyes. Rin was good in reading the unsaid words just by his eyes, she knew there was a thank you in them at the moment. How could he be worried she would forget about him? How could anyone forget about lord Sesshomaru?

"Let's go back," he said. They walked side by side and Rin dried her cheeks with the backs of her hands. She was decided to hold on. If staying in the village was necessary, then be it.

"How long do you want me to stay in the village?" she asked.

"Till you are old enough to decide for yourself."

"When is it?"

"Let's say... seventeen. Or eighteen."

Rin nodded. That was just a few years. She could make it.

"And you'll be visiting me often..." she assured herself.

"As long as you want me to come."

"Good..." she said, taking a deep breath. It won't be the same any more. She will have to say goodbye to all the things she was used to. Sleeping under the sky and staring at the stars before falling asleep, flying on A-Un, fighting with master Jaken or laughing with him and listening to his endless stories... All that was past and her future was shady. But she knew one thing for sure. She was tied to lord Sesshomaru. Nothing could ever change it. And one day, he will come back and take her with him.

"Are you still sad?" lord Sesshomaru asked, his voice betraying him as it was obvious he hoped she wasn't.

"No," she said, giving him a smile. "I know I will stay with you, my lord. Forever and ever. We just need to wait till I'm seventeen."

Lord Sesshomaru seemed amused.

"Don't worry," Rin added in a convinced tone. "It won't take long. I'm working on it already."