Boy, do I have some explaining to do! Before I say anything else I want to just let anyone who is still reading this know that I have in no way given up on this story. I know that the periods between chapters have been ridiculous but with good reason I swear. I have actually just moved halfway across the world to study in Chile for a year! Getting ready for the move and settling in here has been time consuming and has kept me away from this for longer than I would have liked. I am finally starting to get into a rhythm here though so if all goes well I should be able to update regularly enough.

A thousand apologies either way and I hope you enjoy :)

Chapter 11

Brittany inhales sharply and her mind begins to reel. Had Santana just said what she thinks she did? She shuts her eyes and breathes deeply. Santana telling her that she is in love with her is serious dream level type stuff. She knows that if she lets herself believe it, then there is no going back for her. Brittany knows exactly how she feels for Santana and she needs to be sure that they are going into the deep end together.

Santana holds her breath as she waits for Brittany to do or say anything in response to her confession. Santana tentatively brings her hand to Brittany's cheek and tenderly caresses her face. She tucks a few errant strands of hair behind her ear reassuringly.

"Britt?"

Brittany lets out a ragged breath. "Just, give me a…a minute ok?" she says shakily as tears begin to form behind her eyelids.

Santana stills her movements and steels herself in an attempt to be ready for whatever it is that Brittany is about to say.

"So, what you're saying Santana, is that you…love me? You are in love with me?"

Santana doesn't say anything and watches as Brittany still refuses to open her eyes to look at her.

"Why won't you look at me, Brittany?" Santana asks bemused.

"Can you just answer my question please, San?" Brittany's brow furrows and her eyes shut even tighter than before.

"Maybe, if you explain to me why you won't open your eyes and look at me."

"San, as long as my eyes are closed I can hold the picture of you telling me you love me in my mind. I can capture everything. The look in your eyes, the husk to your voice, the way it feels to have you in my arms as you say that to me. I can keep this moment forever. I'm asking you to say it again so that I know you are sure. This is your moment to revise and back out. I'm keeping my eyes shut because if you do decide that you jumped the gun in saying what you said, then I still have this moment in my mind, separate from everything else to follow and I can keep it forever, untainted. And I will know that no matter what you say now, in that moment, I know you meant it, even if it was just for one moment."

"Brittany," Santana sighs, "while I understand why you feel like you need to do this, I'm gonna need you to open your eyes because the moment isn't done and I want you to be able to capture the rest of it with me."

Santana leans forward and rests her forehead against Brittany's brow while she waits for her to decide. Brittany visibly softens and focuses on the gentle pressure on her brow before she slowly opens her eyes. Santana, pleased with the eventual eye contact, places a quick kiss on Brittany's nose before leaning back to look at her properly.

"I am in love with you, Brittany. There is no plainer way to say it. I could get fancy and make big, dramatic, heartfelt declarations in order to try and explain to you just how much I love you, but nothing would be good enough and I don't think you would appreciate it as much. Yes, you like romance and being cheesy from time to time but when it comes to the serious stuff, I think you want the straight forward information, which is that I love you so so much and now I'm really gonna need you to say something because I've lost count of how many times I've told you I love you and I have nothing left to say so it looks like I'm just going to keep on saying it, I love you."

Brittany swallows thickly and fights back the tears that are all but forcing themselves out.

"Ugh god wow, San, way to bring on the waterworks," Brittany half chuckles, half sobs, "You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that and I really don't want to be crying when I say this so I better say it now because I am on the brink here, Santana, I am in love with you and you have no idea how amazing it feels to finally say it."

A few tears drop from Brittany's eyes which she hastily wipes away. Santana wipes one away with her thumb that Brittany had missed.

"I'm sure that I actually have a pretty good idea."

"I'm going to kiss you now," Brittany states.

"You better," Santana says with a hint of a smirk on her face.

Brittany starts by gently kissing Santana on the lips, applying barely any pressure. Santana plays along with the feather light kisses, trying not to laugh when Brittany begins to place kisses on her cheeks and her nose and her forehead, basically anywhere she can reach. Santana's heart swells as she relishes each and every one before she finally stills Brittany's face with both hands cupping her face. Santana gazes in Brittany's azure eyes before firmly kissing her, taking her bottom lip between her own. Brittany is quick to return the favour as she parts her lips and shudders when she feels Santana's breath mingling with her own. They share slow, languid kisses that demonstrate their level of comfort with one another.

Brittany breaks the kiss to shift her position so that she is hovering above Santana. Santana takes advantage of their position and glides her hands up under Brittany's shirt to graze her nails along her taut stomach. Brittany's elbows buckle slightly as she shudders from the sensation.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Lopez," Brittany husks out.

"Well you see, I've got this amazing teacher," Santana whispers as her hands move up to firmly cup the mounds covered by Brittany's bra, "and our lessons are going really well so far. I would say she is the best teacher I've ever had." Santana's squeezes gently before reaching around Brittany to undo her bra.

Brittany prevents herself from closing her eyes so that she can watch the raw sexuality that Santana is exuding as she gets a hold of her bra clasp.

"Is she really that good?" Brittany asks teasingly.

"She is," Santana says as Brittany's bra pops open.

Brittany smiles and together they remove Brittany's top and bra completely. Santana's eyes wander over the exposed flesh and she sighs.

"What's wrong?" Brittany asks.

"Nothing, I've just never been like this with someone that I have such strong feelings for. It feels amazing and kinda overwhelming, my heart feels too big for my chest and no matter how much I look or touch I feel like I will always want more of you," Santana admits.

"That's because with feelings it's better."

"I'm getting that," Santana sighs wistfully.

"I want you to know though, that it has never felt like this for me. Yes, I have been in relationships with serious commitments and what I thought was love before, but this, this is really it."

Santana pushes Brittany back so that she can take her own top and bra off. She lays back down making sure that Brittany stays flush against her. Brittany kisses the crook of Santana's neck before using the tip of her nose to trail down over her collarbone and onto her chest. Brittany kisses above Santana's heart and lays her head down on her chest. Santana knows that Brittany must be able to hear the rapid beating. There was a time where that would have embarrassed her but now she wants Brittany to know, to feel exactly how her body responds to her. Brittany hums in contentment when she feels that Santana's heart is beating in time with her own.

Brittany's fingers run up and down Santana's sides as she turns her head back over to lay kisses down the valley of Santana's breasts. Her hands come to rest on Santana's lower back, pressing upwards so that Santana arches into the kisses that she continues to trail down her abdomen. Brittany inhales deeply and smiles when everything is distinctly Santana.

"I wish I could have your smell around me forever, like make a perfume out of it or something."

Santana laughs as she massages Brittany's scalp, letting her soft hair run between her fingers.

"You'd get sick of it if you wore it all day and then came home to smell the exact same thing."

"Never, it would only remind me of who would be waiting for me when I get home and then I would try to get there faster."

"Brittany, you're a fire-fighter, you can't exactly rush your job, that would be dangerous."

"You're right, the perfume idea is out. I guess I will just have to do everything I can to commit it to memory."

Brittany then simultaneously begins to kiss Santana's exposed neck and grind down into her centre with her thigh. Santana gasps at the sudden contact and automatically brings up her own leg for Brittany to grind down on. They form a strong and fast rhythm against one another as kisses move from necks to lips to ears to chests.

Brittany lifts herself up from Santana so that she can hold onto the arm of the sofa with one hand for leverage and place the other one on the cushion next to Santana's head. Santana wastes no time to make use of the space between them to undo Brittany's pants and push her hand inside. Santana moans at a particularly good thrust from Brittany and at the heat she encounters in Brittany's underwear. Santana slides her fingers through wet folds before rubbing at Brittany's clit. Brittany jerks against her in need.

"Inside," Brittany urges.

Santana works one finger into Brittany, quickly followed by another one. Santana thrusts in and out of Brittany but doesn't have to do much as Brittany rides her fingers vigorously. Santana makes use of her other hand to rub Brittany's clit in time with her thrusts. Santana gasps as Brittany's leg continues to grind into her as she rocks back and forth. Brittany locks eyes with Santana who finds that she becomes ten times more aroused when Brittany looks at her while having her way with her fingers. Santana can feel the desperation oozing from Brittany. She needed to cum and she needed it to be soon. As Brittany rocks back into Santana, she curls her fingers repeatedly and watches as Brittany's eyes widen and her breathing becomes irratic. Brittany thrusts forward harshly a few more times before her hips cant forward and Santana can feel Brittany's strong muscles tightening around her digits. Brittany leans down and kisses Santana as best she can while she cums on her fingers. Brittany's last few thrusts are not enough to send Santana over the edge but Santana hardly notices as she is in absolute bliss after watching Brittany be so free with her like that.

Santana takes her hand out of Brittany's pants. Brittany grabs her wrist and sucks her fingers into her mouth, watching Santana's expression go from blissed to dazed. Brittany's gaze flickers down to the panties that Santana is still wearing. Santana understands the question that Brittany is silently asking and nods her head.

Santana lifts her hips so that Brittany can easily pull away the last barrier between them. Brittany kisses and nips Santana's tight stomach. She hums at the heady scent that greets her when she is level with Santana's centre. Brittany wraps one arm under Santana's thigh and reaches her other hand up to tangle her fingers with Santana's.

Santana gasps loudly at the first contact that Brittany's tongue makes with her almost embarrassingly wet folds. She can feel how careful Brittany is trying to be, she can tell that she doesn't want to shock her too much. But Santana's body is in 100% agreement with her head as she uses her free hand to tangle in Brittany's hair and pull her closer, encouraging her. Santana had never wanted to give herself like this to anyone but every move Brittany makes weaves a safety blanket around her which she is more than happy to wrap herself up in. Santana's breaths come fast as Brittany thoroughly explores her.

"Oh god, Britt! What are you doing to me? I'm…this is…ugh…" Santana's words fail her and she allows her moans of pleasure to let Brittany know how close she is.

Brittany moans loudly when she eventually uses her tongue to enter Santana. She can feel Santana's thighs beginning to quake on either side or her head and with every thrust of her tongue Santana's hips jerk against her harder.

Santana pants heavily and squeezes Brittany's hand tight in her own to let her know that she was at the edge. Brittany squeezes right back before sucking on Santana's clit in order to bring her all the way.

Every part of Santana tightens and shudders as the intensity of her orgasm rips through her. She gasps in order to try and get her breath back. A wave of serenity washes over her as she recovers.

Brittany crawls up and lies down behind Santana, wrapping her arms around her soft waist. She reaches down to pull a blanket over them to keep in the heat they had generated. Brittany presses kisses into Santana's hair and she sighs contentedly.

"That was…that, we have to do that again," Santana's words come slow and sleepy.

"Whenever you want, babe," Brittany promises.

"I love you," Santana says as her eyelids become too heavy to keep open.

"I love you too."

They fall asleep together in their little paradise, not thinking about anything but each other.

…..

"You ready to go?!" Brittany asks as she skips into the kitchen with her bags.

"Mmmm no," Santana grumbles back as she holds a piece of toast out towards Brittany who runs over and takes it from her with her teeth.

Brittany munches away on her toast while getting a glass of juice.

"Do we have to go back?" Santana asks with a pout.

"Don't do that, you know I find it impossible to disappoint you, especially when you are doing that but we've been here nearly two weeks. I have a job to get back to and you have the world to face."

"I know," Santana sighs as she gets up from her stool and moves around the counter to wrap her arms around Brittany, "this place has just been so perfect, I just don't want to leave it."

Brittany turns around in Santana's arms and pecks her on the lips, smiling at the distinctive taste of coffee on her lips.

"We'll come back soon, I promise, I think there are still a few rooms we have left to christen!"

Brittany smiles devilishly and kisses Santana's neck.

"How did we not get to them all?!"

"Don't you worry, we have the whole apartment to christen when we get back," Brittany whispers suggestively in her ear.

"Let's go!" Santana exclaims as she tugs on Brittany's hand to pull her towards the door.

…

"That drive felt a lot longer on the way back," Santana whines as she rubs her neck while getting out of the car.

Brittany walks around the car and reaches out to rub Santana's neck for her.

"I know, babe but we're here now and we can just chill for the evening, maybe order some take out, watch a movie?"

"Mmm yeah, that sounds perfect."

"You head upstairs and put on something comfy, I'll get the bags yeah?"

Santana puts her arms around Brittany's neck and pulls her in for a kiss. "You're too good to me, do you know that?"

"It's just for the sex, I swear," Brittany jokes before dodging a playful punch to the arm that Santana sends her way.

"You are something else Brittany S. Pierce! You're lucky I love you!" Santana calls back as she moves away to head up to the apartment.

"Yeah, yeah, just get that sexy ass of yours upstairs already!"

Santana laughs as she skips up the steps, suddenly feeling a lot better. She takes out the keys to the apartment and tries to open the door. She turns the key to the right and finds that it won't budge.

"What the fuck?" Santana wonders to herself. She decides to try the door handle anyway. The door opens and swings inwards. Santana takes a few steps inside and looks around feeling apprehensive.

She hears high heeled footsteps coming towards her from the kitchen. She doesn't have time to feel worried or think of anything to do before a petite brunette comes around the corner, glass of wine in hand.

Santana doesn't need to ask who she is, she recognises her from the photos.

"Sugar?" Brittany asks in disbelief as she steps through the doorway and drops their bags to the floor.

Santana looks from the smug look on Sugar's face to the utter shock on Brittany's.

"I'm home, babe," Sugar says before casually taking a sip of her wine.

Santana looks to Brittany to see if she understands what's going on more than she does. But it is obvious from Brittany's face that she doesn't. Brittany's jaw sets like stone and Santana can see a darkness to her eyes that she has never seen before. Brittany is seething and her hands curl into fists at her sides.

"Get out," Brittany all but growls.

Santana is currently in a state of shock standing between the two women, head swivelling back and forth to follow their exchange.

"Come now Brittany, there's no need to be like that, let's sit down and talk, we have some unfinished business to attend to." Sugar sits down on the armchair and places her wine down on the coffee table.

"What could we possibly have to talk about, Sugar?" Brittany asks enraged. "You made things pretty clear when I came home to find you screwing my best friend!"

"Look, Sam and I are over now."

"And you think that means I will take you right back?"

"I really think you should leave, Sugar. Brittany clearly doesn't want you here," Santana intervenes as calmly as possible.

Sugar's eyes cut to Santana, sizing her up properly for the first time.

"Actually, I think you are the one who should be leaving. My fiancé and I have a lot to discuss," Sugar states icily.

"You're what?!" Santana and Brittany shout in unison.

Santana's eyes flicker down to Sugar's left hand and sure enough there sits an engagement ring.

"Brittany, what the fuck is she talking about?" Santana asks trying to maintain her cool demeanour as her mind starts to spin.

Brittany finally looks away from Sugar and quickly steps over to Santana, taking her face in her hands.

"I promise you that I have no idea," Brittany urges.

"Oh but don't you Brittany?" Sugar enquires smoothly.

Santana and Brittany both look over to Sugar. Brittany takes her hands away from Santana's face and walks over to the coffee table to stand across from Sugar.

"What are you talking about?"

"We never officially broke off the engagement, honey," Sugar explains.

"Was me kicking you out not clear enough?" Brittany scoffs incredulously.

"You were engaged?" Santana cries out weakly before Sugar can respond.

Brittany looks over to Santana who honestly doesn't know what to do. Her eyes are watery and she has her arms wrapped around herself.

"Well, technically, yes! But she cheated on me and shacked up with Sam! I consider that to be engagement fucking over."

"I need a…a moment," Santana says as her voice cracks. She quickly rushes down the hallway to her room.

"Keeping secrets from your mistress, really Brittany?" Sugar almost laughs.

"Do not call her my mistress, like she is something shameful to be hidden, like she is not the most important person in my life."

This time Sugar does laugh.

"Why did you come here, Sugar? Why now? This is bullshit and you know it."

Brittany wants to just get this over with; she needs to talk to Santana.

"I want us to go back to the way things were."

"Spare me, Sugar. You don't love me and you never did."

"Yes I did!" Sugar shouts, showing her first ounce of real emotion. "I know that what I did was despicable but it doesn't mean I never loved you. You and I both know that I'm superficial and yes your injury was part of it but you weren't just physically wounded in that fire Brittany."

"Again, what are you talking about?" Brittany cries exasperated.

"You weren't you anymore! The fact that you didn't fully heal messed you up emotionally. I tried, I really did, to be there for you, to get you through it. But you completely shut me out until we just weren't us anymore," Sugar explains desperately on the verge of tears.

"I'm still not the one who cheated," Brittany points out.

"I know that, how many times do I need to say that I'm sorry?" Sugar begs.

"If there is a number you'll never reach it," Brittany states.

Sugar finally cracks and drops her head into her hands as she sobs.

"You still haven't told me why you are doing this now," Brittany pushes.

"I realised that I've never been as happy as when I was with you."

"Stop lying to me, Sugar. We still have the same problem, I will never open up to emotionally after the accident and I still have my scar that you hate so much. It's still there."

Enraged, Brittany rips off her jacket, pulls her top off and turns around.

"Can you stand to look at it now?" Brittany asks accusingly. She looks back over her shoulder and sees that Sugar's eyes are firmly fixed on the floor. "That's what I thought. Now, you're going to tell me what you are doing here, honestly."

Sugar takes her hands down from her face and exhales heavily.

"Fine," she starts, "I was told to come here."

"What?"

"I got a phone call from someone called Sue Sylvester, telling me to come over and try and get back together with you."

"If this is here attempt of getting Santana back by using you to draw me away then she is an idiot. You have to have known that it wouldn't work."

"Sue knew that it wouldn't work. She offered me money so I took it."

"Sugar, you don't need money, you're father is a millionaire. What are you really after? And if Sue knew that it wouldn't work then why did she even ask you?" Brittany asks confused.

"She's trying to ruin Santana's image!" Sugar shouts. "Sue knows that Santana is talented and will probably continue to be successful. She has an amazing voice and now she has the diversity card to play."

"I still don't quite understand."

"All Sue needs is a few snaps of me with you or of you and Santana having trouble and she will have the media tear the two of you apart. They would spin it that she abandoned her career and her fans for a fling. For a fling with someone who is actually still engaged to another woman! And I agreed to it because I wanted the media attention, sometimes having a rich daddy doesn't get you all the attention you want."

"Of course you did it for the attention, that's all you ever want. You were even willing to destroy another person's career and mess with my feelings to get it."

Brittany finally sits down, feeling too exhausted to stand.

"I'm sorry," Sugar says meekly.

"Please don't go through with it, whatever Sue has planned," Brittany begs.

Sugar stands up and gets her handbag from the kitchen before making her way to the door.

"I'm sorry, Brittany but it's too late. I've already done the interviews and Sue was just waiting for you to resurface to air them. There is nothing I can do."

Brittany stands up in shock.

"You can do another interview telling the goddamn truth is what you can do!"

"Do you think Sue is going to let me go near any reporters? It's done, Brittany. Goodbye."

Sugar walks out and shuts the door gently behind her, leaving a devastated Brittany in her wake.

….

Brittany knocks twice before walking into Santana's room. She is just lying there on top of the covers, staring at the wall. She doesn't even lift her eyes to look at Brittany. Tear stains are streaked down her face.

"Did you hear any of that?" Brittany asks defeated.

"I heard enough," Santana confirms.

"Look, we can fix this. You're career is not in danger, these rumours will blow over when the paps see that we are so happy together."

Brittany kneels on the floor beside her bed and reaches out to put her hand over Santana's. But Santana retracts her hand so that Brittany can't touch her.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Santana asks despairingly.

"Tell you what?" Brittany asks, stung from Santana's rejection.

"That you were engaged to her?"

"We are not engaged," Brittany states with disbelief.

"I know that you're not. That doesn't mean that you never were. Previous engagements are the kind of thing that you tell your girlfriend." Santana's eyes finally move from their spot on the wall to look Brittany dead in the eye.

"You're right, I should have told you. It did honestly slip my mind though, with the way things ended between us, it never actually felt like we were engaged."

"Who proposed to whom?" Santana asks stonily.

"Eh…I proposed to her," Brittany sighs, "and I'm not going to throw around the 'it didn't mean anything' excuse because at the time it did. I thought we would be forever. I let my infatuation with her blind me to the kind of person that she really was."

Santana watches as a tear runs down Brittany's cheek.

"Please…please don't leave me San," Brittany says as her lips tremble.

Santana looks at Brittany hard before sitting up and moving to the edge of the bed. She pulls Brittany between her legs and tips her chin up so that she is looking at her.

"I'm not leaving you, Brittany. It was just a bit of a shock is all."

Tears of relief begin to stream down Brittany's face. She wraps her arms around Santana's waist and buries her face into her lap. Santana rubs her back soothingly.

"I think now is the time to ask you though. Is there anything else you need to tell me, Britt? You don't have any kids I don't know about, you're not a secret agent, or a drug dealer or anything?"

Brittany laughs in Santana's lap and lifts her face to look at Santana with a smile.

"No to all of the above," Brittany states happily.

Santana nods her head.

"I do have one more question though."

"Anything, I'll tell you anything you want to know," Brittany says proudly.

"Why are you shirtless?"

Brittany looks down at her bare torso and back up at Santana who has a cheeky grin on her face and together they burst out laughing knowing that they will get through this.

...

There you have it readers :) More to come and sorry again :P

Aisling xx