Authors Note: This chapter is the longest chapter EVAR! Seriously, it took 22 pages, I don't even know why, oh and I have decided that this story will be going on until at least chapter 30, I have a bunch of 4 parters that will be starting next chapter and I wont really be taking requests until the 4 parters are over and there are a few sooooo yeah…and if you don't see me update after Spring Break its because I have state exams coming up UGH WHY? But I barely have any school in April so its all GOOD! I hope you like this chapter, it took me like 3 days…
ON WITH THIS INCREDIBLY REDICULOUSLY LONG CHAPTER THAT FOR SOME REASON TOOK UP 22 DOCUMENT PAGES!
OH and there is cursing in this chapter sooooo Viewer Discretion is advised….i think I spelled that right…
The Meeting: In Between Dimensions: Chapter 20
You mad bro?
"Platyborg what are you doing?"
"I am drinking maple syrup, you got a problem with that?"
…
Mustard.
Doof was just walking when-
"RANDOM MUSTARD ATTACK!" Platyborg jumped out and sprayed him with mustard.
Doof glared at him for a moment before starting to strangle the cyborg.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
Platyborg was turning blue now and Doof still hadn't stopped.
"D-Doof?"
"What Platyborg?"
"I-I c-can't br-reathe" Platyborg choked.
"That's because I'm choking you"
"W-when are y-you going t-to st-stop?" Platyborg gasped for air.
"When you stop breathing"
"O-ok t-take your t-time"
Arrested.
Platyborg was walking when all of a sudden Mr Officer Policeman Guy slammed handcuffs on Platyborg's wrists.
"Hey!" Platyborg complained.
"You are under arrest" Said the policeman.
"For WHAT?"
"That is none of your business"
"Its none of my business…ON WHY IM GETTING ARRESTED?"
"Nope"
"But I didn't do anything! I was with Doof all day!"
"Tell it to the judge, trashcan"
"That…that's racist!"
"What seems to be the problem officer?" Doof interrupted.
"This cyborg is under arrest"
"FOR NO REASON!" Platyborg yelled.
Doof put his hand up silently telling Platyborg to be quiet "What are the charges exactly?"
"I don't have any right now but I'm sure the tin can did something illegal today-"
"HEY!"
"Platyborg hush…so your saying you don't have any charges at the moment?"
"That is correct"
"I'm pretty sure the law states that there needs to be charges in order for someone to be arrested"
"Those laws were changed 5 years ago"
"What type of idiot changed that?"
"You did"
"Right…"
The policeman started to push the cyborg to his car.
"BUT I don't technically rule the Tri State Area anymore and the laws were changed back, therefore you have no right to issue an arrest without a reason, do you have a reason?"
"No…"
"Therefore your arrest is invalid" Doof crossed his arms.
The policeman groaned and uncuffed the cyborg.
Platyborg rubbed his wrists as the policeman started to walk away.
"Thanks…how'd you know I was telling the truth?"
"I didn't"
"Then why'd you stop him from arresting me?"
"Do I look like I need another bail bill? No, no I don't, what did you do anyway?"
"I didn't do anything!"
"Sure you didn't" Doof rolled his eye.
"But I swear I didn't do anything this time! He just hates me!"
Doof shook his head at the cyborg and walked back inside the building.
"Doof, I didn't do anything, Doof wait!" Platyborg sighed and turned when he heard a whistle from behind him.
Mr Officer Policeman Guy slid his finger across his neck making the 'Your dead' sign.
Platyborg gulped "Doof, w-wait up!"
The cyborg ran inside the building, locked all the doors and windows, grabbed a knife, went to his room and hid under his blanket.
Replacement.
Platyborg was walking down the hallway and stopped when he saw Doof and a silhouette talking.
"You are by far the BEST thing I have ever created, I've really outdone myself, your complete adequate work"
The thing saluted.
Platyborg leaned on the door trying to get a good look at what it was, but leaned too far and fell into the room.
"Oh there you are Platyborg, come meet my new creation…I call it, Pandaborg"
And sure enough, there was a cybernetic Panda standing there, grinning evilly at the Platyborg.
Platyborgs eyes widened as he stepped back.
"He's ten times stronger, AND more powerful than you"
To prove a point, the Pandaborg slammed the cybernetic platypus to the ground, knocking all the air out of him in the process.
"But…but I'm your cyborg!"
"Correction, you WERE my cyborg, Pandaborg is MUCH better with all the new upgrades I've given him"
"B-but you can give me some new upgrades!"
"I'm sorry Platyborg, I really am, but Pandaborg is my new creation, and you know what they say Platyborg, out with the old and in with the new…Pandaborg, destroy him".
Pandaborg aimed his blaster.
"But…I-I love you!" Platyborg pleaded.
"Yes…but I love Pandaborg…Goodbye Platyborg"
"NO!" Platyborg screamed as the cybernetic panda fired the blaster into his chest "No, no, no, no, no….NO!" Platyborg woke up in his bed.
Doof walked into his bedroom "Platyborg, are you ok? You were screaming is everything alright?"
"What?"
"Did you have a bad dream?" Doof sat beside him.
"A nightmare…" Platyborg held his side.
"Well its alright now, none of it is real"
"I'm so glad its not…" Platyborg sobbed.
"Platyborg, hey its ok…" Doof held the cyborg trying to calm him down "What happened?"
"The worst thing that could possibly happen to me…"
"…you were neutered?"
"It felt like my heart was being neutered"
Smoothie.
Platyborg walked pass Doof who was sitting on the couch reading a book.
"Platyborg what are you doing?"
"I'm gonna make a smoothie"
"You better not break my brand new blender"
"I won't, sheesh"
Doof continued reading his book when he heard an explosion from the kitchen, he ran to the kitchen finding it a mess and Platyborg who was covered in smoothie, staring at the now exploded blender.
"What the heck did you do?"
"I accidently clicked the self destruct button"
"It didn't HAVE a self destruct button" Doof glared.
"Oh"
"Platyborg!"
Platypi.
"Platyborg what the heck are you? Your like some abnormally large blue metal beaver"
"I'm a PLATYPUS, a semi aquatic, egg laying mammal that eats bugs, worms and insect larvae, who is 50% duck and 50% beaver, but in my case I'm 25% duck, 25% beaver and 50% metal, which makes me a Platyborg, and with my human like intelligence and likeness I don't have to stick to my natural diet of bugs, worms, and insect larvae"
"You platypuses are weird…and freaky looking"
"First off, no we're not and Second, the plural for platypus is platypi, it is not platypuses nor is it platypeople"
"…You platypuses get weirder and weirder by the minute"
Family.
Doof was looking through the mail "Ugh great my family sent me a letter".
"Hey Doof how come you never see your family?"
"Because I don't like them"
"Does everyone have a family?"
"Yes Platyborg, everyone does have a family" Doof rolled his eyes, where was the cyborg going with this?
"Wheres mine?"
Doof froze "Uh…what?"
"My family, where are they? Don't I have one?"
"Well…Platyborg…the thing is-"
"I do have one don't I?"
"Yes Platyborg, you do have a family"
"Where are they?"
"At their house…?"
"Why don't I ever see them? Don't they love me?"
"Platyborg…"
"Did they disown me? What did I do wrong? I don't even remember them…" Platyborg said sadly.
Doof just stared at the cyborg as he kept talking sadly about the absence of his family…what was he gonna do? He couldn't just tell him what had happened, he doesn't even remember living with them before- No, he wasn't going to tell Platyborg that, not only would he be crushed, but it would ruin their friendship…but what was he gonna do? He couldn't just lie to Platyborg and say 'Your family never loved you and they disowned you' that would hurt the cyborg, and he couldn't tell him that he, his best friend had taken him away from them…I guess theres only one thing to do…
"Platyborg, how bout we visit them?"
"What?" Platyborg stopped rambling.
"Would you like to visit your family?"
"When?"
"We could go right now if you-"
"I'll go wait in the car!" Platyborg ran out the door.
"-hurry…" Doof sighed as he finished his sentence, he had no idea how this was going to go, its been like 5 years since…No, he wasn't going to go into that, not only for the sake of himself and Platyborg but it would also take REALLY LONG for the author to type out…when he took over the Tri State Area, he remembers it like it was yesterday, it was a calm summer day when- NO he WASN'T going into that…it'd take too long and this chapter is already long enough and isn't even half way finished yet…now getting back on track…What if they forgot him? What if they didn't even want to see him after-NO damnit we AREN'T going into that…
"Knock it off NattyMc!"
Sorry Doof, you know I enjoy messin with ya…anyways…Did they even know what had happened to him after he had disappeared? Did they even notice? So many questions going through Doof's mind at once…he'd better get to the car, last time he left Platyborg in the car alone, the cyborg wasn't even smart enough to open the windows, he almost died in there…stupid cyborg…and another thing, Platyborg is so childlike, what if he cant handle it? What if…aw what the heck he'll just wing it, but seriously he better get to that car before Platyborg dies in there.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
Doof drove the car steadily down the road, but not without taking glances at Platyborg every once in a while, the cyborg was so excited he could barely keep still, he's lucky his seatbelt was on, because Doof was pretty sure that without it, the cybernetic platypus would be bouncing out of his seat.
They finally arrived at the house…this should go over well…
*Inside the Flynn-Flecther house of the 2nd Dimension*
The Phineas and Ferb of the 2nd Dimension were lying on their stomachs, chin in hand, staring at a rock.
"Wow Ferb…this rock is very interesting"
The green haired pale boy nodded and kept staring at the rock, the doorbell rang.
"I'll get it" Phineas announced.
"Don't get it!" Came their paranoid mothers reply from somewhere else in the house.
Phineas and Ferb ran to get the door, they opened it.
"Perry?"
Platyborg stared at the two children, the two boys stared back, Doof stood beside Platyborg, Platyborg cast a nervous glance at Doof who shrugged.
"Perry! It is you! We missed you boy!" The two boys carried the cyborg inside and engulfed him in a group hug of three.
Doof stood by the now closed door, feeling awkward as he watched the two boys hug the small cyborg, Platyborg just looked confused.
Platyborg just stared at them, he never seen these boys before in his life, had he? Suddenly a painful electrical shock went through him that made him yelp and clutch his head…he did, he did remember them.
"Perry?" Phineas asked fearfully "Are you ok boy? Maybe you should lie down" Phineas carefully placed him on the couch.
Platyborg was confused, he did remember them…but what was that shock that went through him when he did? And why were they being so nice to him? He barely even remembered them…do they remember him?
Doof stared wide eyed when Platyborg yelped and clutched his head, what the heck just happened? Was he remembering them? Was it hurting him?
"There you go boy" Phineas had just finished wrapping the cyborg in a blanket in his arms, it was then that Phineas noticed Doofenshmirtz there, I don't know how he didn't notice him before… "Hey, y-your-"
"Doofenshmirtz!" Candace got in front of her brothers protectively with her staff "What are you doing here?"
"Oh great…the leader of the resistance is my cyborgs owners sister…how completely perfect…" Doof rolled his eye.
Just then Linda walked in and she screamed "Phineas! Put that THING down this instant!"
"Mom calm down, its just Perry-"
"NOW PHINEAS!"
Phineas obeyed his mother and put his now robotic pet down.
Platyborg looked at the scene in front of him and everyone around him…they looked awfully familiar- AH!
Platyborg yelped as another burst of electricity went through his head.
"Phineas! Get away from that thing!"
"Mom, calm down, Its just Perry" Candace turned to face her mother, you could tell she was serious, even through her black glasses, still pointing her staff at Doofenshmirtz.
"Just Perry! That thing isn't our pet, it's a monster!"
"MOM…Go back to the panic room, NOW" She was dead serious.
Linda obeyed her daughter and ran back to the panic room.
Candace sighed "What are you doing here Doofenshmirtz?"
"Oh, are you talking to me now? Ow!"
He received a whack to the head courtesy of Candace's staff.
"Answer the question!"
"Ok first of all, that hurt! And second, I'm not here to hurt you or anyone in your family"
"Then why are you here?" Candace demanded.
"Look- Ow!"
"WHY are you here?"
"Will you just- Ow!"
"Answer the question"
"I'm trying! You keep- Ow!"
"I don't have all day"
"Will you stop- Ow!"
"WILL YOU ANSWER THE QUESTION?"
"WILL YOU STOP HITTING ME- OW!"
"ANSWER THE QUESTION, WHY ARE YOU HERE?"
"BECAUSE-"
Candace raised her staff.
"-BECAUSE HIM!" Doofenshmirtz pointed to the cyborg…he was crying.
Candace sighed…he was so confused… "Platyborg, right?"
Platyborg nodded.
"Phineas, Ferb, can you give us a moment?"
They two boys just stared, they were also, quite confused.
Candace sighed "I got you guys a new rock, its on your bed"
The two boys lightened up at that and went to their room.
Candace sighed, for the umpteenth time this evening "Doofenshmirtz, can you give us a minute?"
"No, as a matter a fact I cant, Miss I-hit-people-with-sticks-for-no-good-reason"
"I have the best reasons to hit you with this stick, I also have the best reasons to stab you and watch you bleed to death"
…
"I'm gonna go wait in the hall…"
"Yeah you go do that" Candace shook her head at him as he walked into the hall, she sat on the couch and pat the spot next to her "Sit, we have a lot to discuss"
The cyborg did as he was told.
*In the hallway*
Doof, Phineas and Ferb had their ears to the door trying to listen in.
"I wonder what their talking about" Phineas said.
Ferb shrugged.
"I can't hear anything…" Doof said.
Suddenly the door flew open and the three of them fell into the room, Candace stood by the door holding the doorknob.
"Perry!" The boys ran to their pet who happily hugged them back.
Doofenshmirtz got up and dusted himself off "What'd you tell him? You didn't tell him the truth did you?"
"Of course not, what was I going tell him, that the only person he trusts and knows is the one that took him away from his family? Do you know how conflicted he'd be? Of course I lied you idiot"
"Theres no need for the name calling, I brought him back didn't I?"
"Yeah, it only took you five years" Candace smirked.
"Better late than never, and what DID you tell him anyway?"
"Wouldn't you like to know"
"What you wont tell me? …Is it because you hate me or are you just being a jerk?"
"Both"
"It figures"
"Come on Perry, lets go up to our room, me and Ferb still have your bed"
"Actually Phineas, Perry isn't staying here" Candace told her brother.
"But…"
"But he'll be visiting every now and again, isn't that right Doofenshmirtz?" Candace glared at the semi dictator.
"Sureeee why not" He rolled his eye.
"Well its getting late, they really should be getting back"
"Oh…bye Perry, come visit us real soon ok boy?"
The cyborg nodded and headed for the car.
"Come on Ferb, lets go check out that rock" The two brothers ran to their room.
"And I suppose I'll be seeing you real soon huh?"
Candace slammed him against the wall "If you EVER hurt my family and/or pet I WILL kill you"
"Okay! Okay, I get it sheesh!"
Candace released him and he walked out the door.
"Freaking psychopath…"
P-borg.
Platyborg and Doof are eating breakfast when Jylamz appeared.
"Great…another insane reviewer…what do you want?" Doof said grumpily.
"Why're you so grumpy in the morning?" Platyborg asked as he poured his cereal.
"I am NOT grumpy Platyborg"
"Sure your not, grandpa"
"Are you calling me old?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact I am, what are you gonna do about it?" Platyborg challenged.
Doof thought about it for a moment before starting again to strangle the cyborg.
"I'll show you old you little-"
ENOUGH! –Jylamz
They immediately stopped.
Platyborg held his throat as he tried to catch his breath "What type of MONSTER are you?"
"One that will strangle you if you call me old again, you little blue bastard!"
Platyborg growled at him.
Uh guys? –Jylamz
"Bewegen sich nicht!" Platyborg yelled.
"Did you just yell at me in German?"
"Ja, ja, ich habe!"
"Don't you 'Yes, yes I did' in German, me Platyborg!"
Platyborg, do you wanna go to the movies? –Jylamz.
"Ja, ja, ich tue" Platyborg answered.
"Platyborg, no you aren't going to the movies, we were supposed to go somewhere today"
"Nein!"
"Yes Platyborg"
"Nein!"
"Yes"
"Nein!
"Platyborg!"
"Nein!"
"I cant believe this…"
"Nein!
"Please Platyborg?"
"Nein!"
"I cant believe I'm about to say this….please, P-borg?"
…
Platyborg smiled and hugged the former dictator.
"So will you come with me?"
"Nein" Platyborg shook his head and walked out the door with Jylamz.
Which just left Doof standing there.
...
"VERFLUCHT SEIST DU PERRY DAS PLATYBORG!"
Almond Brittle.
I'm really sorry for the behavior of the other reviewers –Out With a Whoosh and a Thunk.
"Its no problem, thanks for the Almond Brittle"
No prob –Out With a Whoosh and a Thunk
"You are by far my favorite reviewer"
Pokestab.
Platyborg was walking when he suddenly felt pain go through him, he screamed and fell to the ground, looking up at his attacker.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x
"CYBORG DOWN! CYBORG DOWN! I'VE BEEN STABBED!"
"Platyborg, I poked you!"
"HELP! I'M BEING MURDERED! HELP, HELP AHHHHHH!"
"Will you be quiet? The neighbors are gonna think I'm murdering you!"
Platyborg crawled weakly to the telephone and started dialing from the floor.
"Platyborg who the heck are you calling?"
"Hello 911, yeah I've just been stabbed, I need help"
"For gods sake Platyborg, I poked you!"
"Yeah my attackers still here, Doof they want to talk to you" Platyborg handed the phone out to Doof.
Doof glared at the cyborg.
"…Why're you looking at me like that? …Doof?"
Doof pinned the cyborg to the ground and started strangling him.
"HELP! HELP! I'M BEING STRANGLED!"
"SHUT UP!"
I don't know about you guys, but I feel really sorry for the people on the other end of that phone call…
Tournament.
WordNerb93 was hosting a tournament in a large coliseum and in the audience was all the reviewers, Platyborg and Doof, and me, cyborgs were fighting robots and the winner was always the Catborg Jack.
This is cool.
"This is epic" Platyborg grinned as he watched the tournament.
"He thinks its epic now, wait until he finds out I entered him into the contest…" Doof laughed as he counted his money.
Are you insane? He'll be killed!
"He wont, believe me, I'm not that lucky…"
I glare at him.
"What?"
The announcer announced the next event "Time for our next competitor to take on Jackborg, he's a very small blue semi aquatic egg laying cyborg…"
"I wonder who that could be" Platyborg wondered aloud.
"Hereeeeeees Platyborg!" The announcer finished.
"What?" Platyborg asked before immediately being pushed into the arena by Doof.
"Good Luck!" Doof called to him.
Well at least you believe in him enough to bet that he'd win.
"Pfft! Are you kidding me? Platyborg cant even beat me at chutes and ladders, he says the game is too 'complicated', of course I bet on him to loose!"
What?
"Shhh its starting!"
I cant watch…
Jackborg stepped closer to Platyborg who backed away.
"Uh, heyy dude"
Jackborg growled at him.
"Whats up?"
Jackborg grabbed Platyborgs tail and grinned evilly.
"Oh crap…AHHHH!" Platyborg screamed as Jackborg started throwing him around and slamming him into things by his tail, he was slammed into the wall, the floor, more walls and even a hotdog stand…
After 10 minutes of non-stop slamming into things, Jackborg slammed Platyborg to the ground, he had bruises and cuts from head to toe.
Platyborg stood up "Alright, now its MY turn" Platyborg narrowed his eyes at Catborg and out of the cybernetic platypuses body, over twenty compartments opened, each one spouting a large missile.
*In the audience*
Did you know he could do that?
"No, no I did not"
You really should start reading the manuals of the things you create.
"Yes, yes I should"
*Back in the center of the arena*
"Say goodbye Jerkborg" Platyborg fired his missiles which exploded on impact, Jackborg lay down, damaged beyond repair.
Platyborg went back into the audience after receiving a gold trophy and 3 medals.
"Hey Doof I won"
"You little bastard…you cost me…5 HUNDRED DOLLARS!" Doof started strangling the cyborg.
Babysitting.
"But I don't want to babysit!" Platyborg complained.
"Too bad, you should have thought of that before you cost me $500"
"How was I supposed to know you wanted me to lose? You just assumed that I would, and now that I think about it that's kind of harsh, I am hurt Doof, I am really hurt" Platyborg sniffed.
"Cut the crap, you are babysitting little Suzy Johnson and that's final"
Platyborg groaned.
"I have to go to a LOVEMUFFIN meeting and I have to deal with Rodney so its even" Doof put on his coat.
"But little kids are evil! You know that!"
"Platyborg stop it, you are babysitting tonight, and don't screw up, the family is paying me for the night" Doofenshmirtz headed to the door.
"Fine…" Platyborg sighed "Wait…paying you? I'm the one babysitting! Don't I get any money?"
Doof thought about this for a moment "No, no you don't"
"That, that's bull!"
"Platyborg-"
Just then the doorbell rang.
"Oh look shes here"
Platyborg groaned.
Doof glared at the cyborg "Platyborg if you screw this up I swear I will MURDER you, I will take you and strap you to a metal table, cut all your limbs off and play autopsy with whats left of you, put you in a blender and feed you to a whale"
Platyborg gulped.
Doof opened the door.
"Bubbles!"
"How cute" Doof cooed.
"Thank you for babysitting me on such short notice, I really appreciate it, I know we'll have a lot of fun together" Suzy giggled sweetly.
"See? She's completely harmless"
"Doof-"
"DON'T screw this up" And with that Doof left.
That just left Suzy and Platyborg.
"So Suzy, what do you wanna-"
"I wanna play a game" Suzy said, not so sweetly.
"Okay…whats it called?"
"Your DEATH" Suzy pulled out a chainsaw and started maniacally laughing.
"I knew little kids were evil!"
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Platyborg was running for his life all over DEI from a psychotic Suzy who was chasing him with a running chainsaw.
"Get back here!" Suzy demanded.
"NO!"
"I promise I wont hurt you"
"Wont hurt me? Your chasing me with a freaking chainsaw!"
"Whats your point?"
"My point is, YOU'RE A PSYCHOPATH!" Platyborg quickly hid inside a closet and locked it.
Platyborg tried to catch his breath and think, he had to get help, he couldn't hide from her forever, he quick got out his phone and called Doof.
Ring.
Ring.
Ring.
Ring.
Ring.
"Pick up, Pick up, pick up…"
"Hello?"
"Doof!"
"Hello to you too Platyborg, I've really gotta teach you manners…"
"I need your help!"
"What is it this time?"
"Suzy's trying to kill me!"
"Platyborg I doubt that sweet little girl is trying to kill you"
"She has a chainsaw!"
"Platyborg, I'm in the middle of a meeting, I'm sure you can handle it yourself"
"But Doof-"
"No buts! I have to go"
"But-"
"Platyborg I'm busy, handle it yourself!"
Dialtone.
Platyborg sighed.
Just then the door to the closet was ripped open.
"Oh there you are Platyborg" Suzy mused evilly.
Platyborg looked up at her in horror.
A blood-curdling scream could be heard from the building.
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
Doof walked through the door and put his coat on the hanger.
"Platyborg I'm back…Platyborg?"
"Hey Doof" Platyborg walked into the room and smiled at his friend.
"Wheres Suzy?"
"Over there" Platyborg pointed to the corner.
Doof's eyes widened as he saw that the little girl was duck taped to a chair with a piece of tape covering her mouth.
"Platyborg! You cant go around duck taping little girls to chairs" Doof went to untie the child.
"No Doof don't untie her!"
"Platyborg we cant leave her taped to a chair"
"Shes evil! She tried to kill me with a chainsaw!"
"Shes just a little girl, whats the worst that could happen?"
*3 minutes later*
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Doofenshmirtz and Platyborg were running for their lives all throughout DEI from Suzy who was wielding a running chainsaw.
"See? What did I tell you? She's evil!"
"Oh shut up!"
"I was right! Admit it!"
"I'm not admitting anything to you Platyborg!"
"Admit it!"
"No!"
"Do it or I'll trip you!"
"Fine! You were right and I was wrong, I was terribly, horrifyingly wrong! Happy?"
"Yes as a matter of fact I am" Platyborg smirked "So what now?"
"Run and scream!"
"Right…"
They both cleared their throat.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
A/N: Longest chapter of meh life!