Chapter 4 Confrontation

It was only three days to Christmas and Bill was up to his neck in work. He had been sent on a last minute assignment to Peru. If he wanted to spend Christmas with his family he had to finish his examination of the temple and its objects soon.

He normally loved his job but now he could not get rid of this feeling of dread in his stomach because Hermione still hasn't answered him. He had suggested to meet in person, but she had just plainly refused to see him yet.

Extensive Christmas shopping was also out of the question this year. He had gotten some sculptures and jewellery made by indigenous artists as well as some culinary treats. Luckily he had relatively quickly found a store that sold tasteful things not the usual tourist stuff.

Currently he was trying to work his way through several layers of protective charms on what seemed to be a simple stone statue of some goddess or another. The question was why it was so heavily protected. Normally this would have peeked Bill's curiosity but at the moment he found it hard to concentrate on the task at hand. He had paid for his wandering mind several times over the past days, nothing severe but nevertheless quite painful at times.

He cursed when a sudden pain shot through his hand up his arm, drawing on all his willpower he pushed all thoughts on Hermione to the back of his mind and focused on the statue in front of him.

-O-O-O-

Ever since she had received Bill's letter Hermione had been on an emotional rollercoaster. She was usually a quite grounded person, patient and kind so quite a lot of people in her vicinity had been in for a nasty surprise lately.

She had lost her patience with some quivering house elves, snapped at her assistant and currently refused to speak with Harry and Ron at all.

Ginny had been sent to talk to her to find out what was going on, but she really didn't want to talk to Ginny about her brother.

Her only confidant was her cousin, and she had banned her from her apartment because she couldn't bring herself to listen to anymore of Hermione's rants. They would always go the same way. She would start out by reminiscing her short friendship with Bill, remembering all his good trades, but then she got upset, for him sleeping with her and leaving her, then going without a word for almost two years and then writing her and expecting her to be free and come running. She could go on for hours like that.

Catherine wasn't sure what to tell Hermione. She didn't know Bill and couldn't really advise Hermione one way or the other so she told her to just meet him and talk to him. Hermione would have none of that since she hadn't made up her mind yet. Catherine doubted that she ever would.

So one night one hour into Hermione's rant Catherine had interrupted her and said that she couldn't bare listening to her any longer. Hermione had left in an outrage and Catherine felt bad, but she knew it was necessary for her sanity.

It was only two days till Christmas and Hermione was currently sitting at her desk trying to come up with an excuse why not to go to the Weasley dinner the next evening. The Weasleys had started the tradition to invite almost everybody they knew for a big dinner on Christmas eve. The 25th she was going to spend with her family.

In the end Hermione decided to go and hope for the best. She knew she was a bad liar and she didn't want to disappoint Molly. Her only hope was that there would be so many people that she could avoid Bill.

-O-O-O-

Bill arrived late in the afternoon on the 24th in his childhood home. After an extensive welcome from his family he barely had time to shower and get changed. He was so nervous to meet Hermione he felt almost physically ill. He rushed back downstairs waiting close to the fireplace in hopes to intercept Hermione when she arrived to be able to talk to her before dinner.

It was against Hermione's nature to be late, so it took all of her willpower to not floo to the Bureau on time. The dinner always started later because it took forever until all the guests arrived. Hermione hoped to arrive just in time for the dinner.

Her plan seemed to work, when she arrived 15 minutes late, most were already seated at the table. Then out of nowhere Bill appeared. Before he could say anything she said surly: "Not now dinner is about to start." And walked into the dining room with lightning speed. For a moment Bill stood there completely stunned. Then he followed her slowly.

When he arrived in the dining room she had already squeezed herself in a seat between Ginny and Ron, so he sat down on the other side of the table. During dinner he tried to establish eye contact with her but she wouldn't look even anywhere near his way. Instead she talked animatedly to Ginny, it seemed a little forced though, her laughter a little too shrill.

After dinner she still avoided looking at him, as soon as he came near her she would disappear mysteriously. Bill was slowly getting fed up with her reaction, he preferred that she just told him to sod off instead of ignoring him completely.

When she went to the loo he followed her and waited outside. As soon as she left the bathroom he grabbed her and pulled her upstairs and into his old room. Hermione struggled and made her feelings on the matter quite clear.

Inside his room he turned to her and said: "Just shut up for a moment, will you?"

Hermione looked at him for a split second in surprise then her eyes turned to slits and Bill knew she would launch into another rant if he didn't stop her.

So he hastily continued: "Look can we just talk. I mean if you want me to leave you alone then that is fine I will respect your wishes. Just please tell me and stop ignoring me, I need to know where I stand."

"Well what do you expect? You write me a letter out of the blue after almost two years of not hearing from you and expect me to be free and come running back to you? I really cared for you, you jerk, but for you it was all a mistake. How could you play with my feelings like that, you must have known that I cared for you, I was not exactly subtle. And I was stupid enough to sleep with you, I was so naive, I should have known better. God I really thought that what we had was different, that I was not one of your tarts." Hermione slowly felt how that huge anger that she had carried around with her for over a year now, slowly started to leave her it felt relieving to tell him how much she had hurt from what had happened.

Bill hung his head in shame: "I know. I am truly sorry about what happened back then. I really enjoyed our friendship and you meant and still mean a lot to me Hermione, but back then I wasn't ready for more I was still hurting over Fleur."

"Fleur and you had broken up years before that, what took you so long to get over her?" Hermione felt jealousy slowly creeping up inside her. She knew she was not as stunning as Fleur, she was rather plain in the looks department, no guy would ever cry over her for years. And she knew she could never compare to the French half Veela.

"I idealised her and I was too scared to open up again and become vulnerable I didn't want to experience that kind of pain ever again." Bill answered honestly.

"And now you are over her and ready to open up again or what? Where does that come from? And maybe you are idealising me now, I mean we haven't had any contact in so long and then you suddenly write me some rubbish about seeing my face and me being the one you want to spend your life with. What if I am not the person you make me out to be? Will you make your excuses and leave again? How can I trust anything you tell me, I don't want to get hurt either you know?"

Standing in front of him, looking into his eyes and being absolutely open and honest about their feelings with each other for the first time, her tender feelings for him that she had buried deep within her started to come to the surface. She wanted to believe him, but she was scared. Scared to give him another chance and be hurt again and yet at the same time she wanted him to make her trust him.

So Bill started to tell her about how he met Fleur and how he realised she was not the woman he thought her to be and how he was finally able to move on. He told her about his affairs and about how that was not enough for him anymore. He also told her about the self-help book and about those questions and how he saw her when he thought about who he wanted by his side.

"Let's take things slow. I want to get this right this time. Let me take you on dates, so we can get reacquainted with each other. Please just give me this chance. If you still decide that you don't want me I will leave you alone, I promise." Bill looked at her pleadingly.

That didn't sound too bad. It sounded quite good actually in Hermione's opinion. That way she would be able to find out if he really had changed without getting in too deep, or so she hoped.

"I'd like that." Hermione said with a small smile.

Bill couldn't help the goofy grin that spread over his face.