Beyond the Veil V2

by Nicogen

Naruto thought nothing was worse that going back to school. That was until he found himself engaged to an alien princess. Now he has to deal with the Akatsuki who some how have a foot hold in this world. But peolple from outer space! At least he has the Pervy Sage. "Stop writing about me you pervert!" "I can't help it kid you're life is gold!" "Lala why are you naked...Again!"

13. Chapter 13

Alright sorry for the wait guys. Honestly I have no excuse other than life, but you can only say that so many times. ….50 of you just rolled your eyes didn't you? }:(

Oh well here the next chapter before shit hits the fan.

…

Harem list…..

Lala Satalin Deviluke

Yui Kotegawa

Yami aka Golden Darkness

Risa Momioka

Saki Tenjouin

Oc Rouge Female Urban Veil ninja -Isabella Bea-sexy Latina ninja, with a Day of the Dead theme.

Oc Female Jashinist Heretic-Maigo Tamashi (Means- Lost child, Soul)

Mikan Yuuki

Oshizu Murasame

Momo Veila Deviluke

Nana Aster Deviluke

Ryouko Mikado

Run Elsie Jewelria-nothing sexual until her and Ren split into two beings. But Run will flirt a lot.

No Hinata

No Sakura

If you want to read a fic with those pairings just go to the non-crossover section.

…..

I don't own Naruto or To Love ru…God damnit! :(

….

Chapter 13 – Ghosts of the past.

…..

The next day.

In Yami's mind.

Yami slowly open her eyes as she awoke, only to narrow them in confusion as she found herself in a forest leaning against the largest tree she had ever seen. The thing was so large that she look both left and right and could only she the tree as it spanned for miles. She looked up and again saw that the tree height went for miles but she did see a large flower of some kind up top. Once she was done examining the tree she looked around her and saw that she was in a forest made of nothing but saplings made from purple leaf trees.

"I must in some nature reserve?" Yami thought as look at the trees and noted that they looked like they had been freshly planted. This strengthen her thought it was a nature reserve, one that was probably made by some nature activists.

"But how did I get here?" thought the golden hair assassin. Did she sleepwalk? She done it before when she was little and Tearju Lunatique had to find her as she got lost. If she did she must be hundreds of miles away from the house her target had invited her to sleep at. She would have seen the great tree in the distance. She looked up again and thought of something. This tree and the surrounding forest didn't match the plant life associated with Earth.

"I'm not on Earth." Yami said to herself.

VRRRRRRRRR! VOOO! BOOOOOOM!

All of a sudden the enormous tree groaned and a ring of energy pulsed from the top of the tree all the way to the forest floor.

Yami widen her eyes as every tree grew to maturity become three stories tall. What would have taken a decade to happen just took place in seconds! What the heck was happening?

BOOOOOOM!

Yami snapped her in direction of the noise as she recognized the sound of a ship coming out of FTL.

"Clear the area for royal party!" shouted an armored soldier as he and a squad of six men as they came out of the wood work. They looked your average soldiers in combat armor, the only thing unique about them was the two horns on top of their heads.

"Sir Yes sir!" shouted the soldiers looking around for any hostile life forms. "The area is clear sir!" shouted one of the soldiers.

"Good" nodded their captain "This way your highness!" Shouted the captain. From behind them step a being that made Yami gasp in shock. "They look just like Naruto Uzumaki when he transformed!" she thought before she remember a history lesson Tearju Lunatique taught her.

"It can't be?!" she said as looked at the horned being in a set regal of robes, its horns wrapped in gold. In his arms he carried a small figure covered by cloth. "They're Oni," Yami finally realized what was happening. She hadn't been transport to an unknown world she was in fact still sleeping. "I'm reliving IT's memories"

She remember she had experienced something like this before. She remember that she had seen events of Tearju Lunatique's life before, where she couldn't move and could only watch. After a few times she had asked Tearju how this was possible. Tearju had told her that it was a side effect of the cloning process and that they were just residual energy in her genetic code. She said that they would fade in time unless Yami became unusually stressed about something. Or if the two of them exchanged energy like a static shock. These memories were from the other half of her genetic code.

"Please Great Tree hear my plea!" cried the Golden horned Oni on its knees "My daughter is dying and nothing our greatest healers do can save her! So please Great Tree, please gift her with your healing fruit so that she may live!"

Yami felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand stiff as she felt a powerful pulse of energy.

"NO!" Roared the tree in the minds of all present.

"Please I'll give up my throne I don't care about ruling, just save my daughter!" the Oni Emperor yelled with tears rolling down his face.

"I can taste your lies in the air mortal, all you mortals do is lie! No I will not give you my fruit as like all mortals your daughter will abuse the power it will bestow upon her!"groaned the tree.

"No she will not! My daughter is a kind soul she only use your power for good I know it!" shouted the Oni.

"I HAVE LIVED FOR BILLIONS OF YEARS DON'T YOU DARE THINK YOUR WISDOM IS GREATER THAN MINE! SHE WILL USE MY POWER TO FULFILL HER SELFISH DESIRES JUST AS ALL THOSE WITH POWER DO! IF SHE IS MEANT TO DIE! THEN! SHE! SHALL! DIE!" the Great Tree roared.

"Then you leave me no choice Great Tree." The Oni Emperor said as hundreds of Oni drop ships entered the atmosphere and deployed thousands of soldiers who immediately descend on the tree.

"You would sacrifice thousands of lives just to save the life of one sickly child?!" said the tree as numerous flowers appeared on its trunk and set fire upon the army of Oni.

"FOR MY DAUGHTER I DO ANYTHING!" roared the Emperor as his army searched and died for the fruit that would save his daughter.

"And just like all those before you, using your power to fulfill your desires giving no care for those that suffer because of it." Said the tree with a hint of sadness as a large root ripped its self out of the ground and crashed against the ships firing upon it.

"Your highness I believe I found it!" said a solider as he held some strange black fruit in his hands, immediately after he handed the fruit to his lord another root pop out of ground and rushed for the Princess.

Squish!

The soldier threw himself in front of the girl making the root stab him in the gut and whipped him up into the air giving the Emperor time to scoop up his daughter and run for the nearest ship.

"Here Kaguya my dear eat this, it should cure you!" the Emperor said handing the black fruit to his daughter as soon as he broad the vessel.

The little girl in a sicken daze obeyed her father ate the fruit, and when she swallowed the last bite her body started to convulse violently as she started to scream.

"Kaguya!" cried her father.

"AHHHHHHH!" cried Kaguya as her eyes turned white making her look blind.

"Oh no! My baby girl I'm so sorry!" the Emperor said as he thought he caused his little girl to go blind.

"AHHHHHH!" Screamed the little girl again as blood sprayed from her forehead and a single red eye open in the center of her forehead. She convulsed one last time and then stiff as a bored.

"Kaguya! Kaguya please answer me!" Her father said shaking her.

"Father? Is that you?" Kaguya said as the veins on her face swelled

"Yes my dear it's me!" the man said as he grabbed her hand.

"Why are you glowing?" asked the girl since she was seeing the inner energy of her father.

"I don't know maybe you haven't open your eyes in so long" he said gently rubbing her cheek. "All that matters is that you are okay now."

"Such arrogance! You mortals have proved time and time again that you do not deserve life! I have had enough!" Roared the Great Tree in anger. "I'm done bringing life to underserving worlds!" It raged as the shape of the tree started to change into something else. "I'm going to show you that not only am I a god of life. BUT THAT I'M ALSO A DESTROYER! I WILL RIP THE UNIVERSE ASUNDER AND BEGIN ANEW!" the now giant beast roared as it sent one last tentacle at the royal drop ship ripping a hole in the side, pulled out a figure and brought it towards its face revealing the figure to be none other than the Oni Emperor. "I WILL FIRST START WITH YOU AND THEN WIPE AWAY EVERY TRACE OF YOUR WRENCTHED RACE!" It roared as it crushed the man in a spray of gore.

In the real world….

"AHHHHH!" Yelled Yami as she awoke in a cold sweat. She looked around and sighed in relief as she saw that she was in the room that was given to her by Naruto. "Why did I see that?" she thought as she put her hands to her face. "Was the fight with Naruto so intense that it brought forth the memories of the DESTROYER?" she asked herself as she stood up and headed to the bathroom to take a bath to clear her head.

As she stripped naked and drew her bath she thought "Ever since I came to this planet more and more questions keep popping up." She sat in the warm water looked up at the ceiling in thought "And it's all because of Naruto." She thought to herself as she closed her eyes and relaxed.

With Naruto…

"Ah man not again!" whine Naruto as he found himself in his mind.

"Oh stop your whining!" shouted the voice of the Kyuubi. "I swear every time you come in here you are bitching!" shouted the Fox.

"Well I don't like being pulled in here unannounced damnit!" Naruto snapped at the demon who just glared at him.

"I'm not one for making requests kit." Said the Fox. "And at least I had the decency to wait for to fall asleep before I pulled you in here."

"Yeah but it's basically the same as waking me up," Said the ninja "Hence why I'm an irritable asshole right now." He said crossing his arms.

"Alright fine I tell you before I pull you in here, you damn ungrateful brat." Said the Fox sighing.

"So what did you want to talk to me about?" Naruto said sitting down since he basically floated over the water.

"That blonde assassin girl you should be wary of that her, she's dangerous." Warned the fox.

"Honestly with all the shit that happens in my life Sweetheart only ranks a five/ten on my danger meter." He said dryly. His meter went from 1-being stupid civilians to 10-Tsunade catching him doing something perverted. On a side note the cat named Tora back in the nations ranked as an 8 in his book.

"Still you should be wary there something about her that puts me on edge." Kyuubi said before becoming serious. "But that isn't really what I brought you in here for, the Seven tails…his host has been captured."

"How do you know that?!" asked Naruto standing up. "Do know where they are?!" he shouted.

"We bijuu were once a part of the same being, and no matter how much we deny it we will always be connected. And it is too late to save the Seven tails and his host, somehow the connection has been severed. But the Seven tails in it's finally moments before being sealed sent the others and me a warning." Kyuubi said before its face went grave. "What NO IT CAN'T BE!?" shouted the fox.

"What did he say Kyuubi?!" demanded the blonde.

"The Akatsuki, they found it. They found the body of the Juubi" The fox leaned down and looked at her host in the eye. "You need you get stronger kit."

"You're saying I'm not strong enough?!" Snarled Naruto.

"No you're not kit, you are nowhere near strong enough to face the trials ahead of you. You need to become stronger, stronger than you are now or we are all done for!" The Fox said staring at the boy. "You need to improve yourself in both body and mind, else you will fall and take all that you hold dear with you!" the fox said seriously.

"And how am I supposed to do that?" Naruto asked.

"Ask the Toad Sage, 'how does one become one with nature?' Once you accomplish that then we shall move unto the next step." The fox said turning around and walking deeper into the cage.

"And what would that be?!" yelled Naruto as the corners of his mindscape grew dark.

"How to turn your inner beast into your inner strength! Then you might be strong enough to face the coming darkness." said the fox as Naruto left his mindscape.

Outside the seal…

"Damn fox, always speaking in riddles at the end of our conversations." Naruto said to himself. He sat up, stretched and yawn loudly he looked at the clock and sighed. "Come on Lala-chan get up, else we're going to be late to school." Naruto said shaking the alien girl in his bed.

"Hmm five more minutes Naruto-kun." Lala said turning over and clamping onto Peke.

"Fine I'm going to take a shower, Peke wake her up in about 10 minutes." Naruto said heading for the door.

"No problem Naruto-dono." Peke said as Naruto opened the door and walked across the hall to the bathroom.

"Yawn!" Said Naruto as he opened the door to the bathroom. He looked in the room and then all of the sudden his eyes widen at the sight in front of him.

There standing completely naked before him was Yami drying her hair giving Naruto a full view of the girl's naked body.

"OH…MY…..GOD!" Naruto thought never taking his eyes off the girl he as he had a massive nose bleed. Like the day before the girl was affecting him strangely. His heart started to beat rapidly, his eyes dilated and he got a weird feeling in his gut. He went red in the face as he stared at the girl who just stared back in shock.

And then the inevitable happened. With multiple factors conceding it was impossible to avoid. Given that he was a teenage boy, the weird connection going on between the two, and the fact it was morning….. That's right ladies and gentlemen. He got morning wood.

Naruto looked down, looked back up, saw Yami's eyes widen in surprise, and then he paled when her face contorted in rage.

Meanwhile…

Jiraiya and Tsunade at the same time shot up out of their beds and said "I feel a disturbance."

Back with Naruto and Yami…..

"Now Sweetheart this isn't what it looks …LIKE!" Naruto began to say before Yami sent some hair spears at him.

"YOU HENTAI!" she roared as her hair whipped around violently.

"OH FUCK!" Naruto shouted as he just said fuck it and jumped out the nearest window and ran for his life.

"YOU ARE NOT GETTING AWAY THAT EASILY!" Yami said grabbing her clothes.

Outside in the backyard.

Crash!

"Heh?" Asked a downsized Gamakichi sitting in a pond in the backyard.

"GAMAKICHI DO ME A HUGE FAVOR AND TELL LALA-CHAN TO GO TO YUI-CHAN'S WITHOUT ME!" screamed Naruto as he landed in front of the toad before jumping over the fence.

"What the hell was that about?" the toad said scathing his head before another person jump outside.

"I'M GOING TO CUT IT OFF THIS TIME!" Yelled Yami morphing her arms to blades and running after Naruto.

"Whoa!" said the toad. "I wonder if pops seen anything like this happen between Jiraiya and Tsunade?" he said before making his way inside to tell Lala, Naruto's message.

Now you're probably wondering 'Why is Gamakichi in the backyard and not on Mount Myoboku?' Well…

Flashback yesterday…..

"HAHHAHHAAHHHHAA!" laughed Gamakichi as Naruto told him what had been happening in his life. "And then what happen?" he asked.

"Well after getting my ass kicked by the Kung fu water fountain I got pissed off and fired a lighting jutsu at the son of a bitch and fried the nanobots in it." Naruto said proudly.

"Hehehehe, you got your ass kicked by a water fountain!" Giggled the orange toad.

"SHUT UP!" Roared Naruto in embarrassment.

"Hehehehe, sorry but it's too funny." Laughed Gamakichi. "Hehehe, well it been fun catching up, but it's getting late and I don't want to get bitch out by mom." He said putting his hands together. "But summon me sometime this weekend and we'll hangout alright." he said before a cloud of smoke appeared.

"It was nice catching up with him." Naruto said walking towards the house.

"What?!" he heard Gamakichi say.

"Huh?!" Naruto said turning around. To his surprise he saw the toad just staring at him in shock.

"Did I mess up a handseal?" the toad said putting his hands together again.

POOF! "I had it that time for sure!" he yelled.

"I'm afraid unless you want to die you won't be going home for a while Gamakichi" Said Jiraiya walking outside.

"What do you mean I can't go home?!" shouted the young toad.

"I mean Blondie here fucked up" the sage said pointing at his student.

"Me? What the hell I do?" Naruto asked before getting smacked upside the head.

"Baka! What was one of the first things I told you when we arrived here!?" Shouted the white haired man.

"I can't really remember sensei because right after you told me that shit, I immediately ended up face to crotch with Yui-chan for the first time." Naruto said shrugging making his master face palm.

"Me and my urge to corrupt him!" inwardly sighed the sage. "Fine I'll remind you, ya nimrod! I told you not to summon any toads unless it was a messenger toad." He said pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Why was that again?" Naruto said cocking his head to the side.

"Because messenger toads are the only ones that have the chakra control required to safely travel long distances. Combat toads such as Gamakichi here are just built for power." Jiraiya said pointing his thumb at the shocked toad.

"So you're saying until you guys go back to the nations I pretty much stuck here?" Gamakichi said cocking an eyebrow.

"Unfortunately yes" sighed the sage.

"Hehehe sorry about that BUDDDYYY!" apologized Naruto before Gamakichi grabbed him by the legs with his tongue.

"OH YOU'RE GOING TO BE SORRY ALRIGHT!" said the toad before he started swinging him around and then slamming him against the ground twenty times. "I DEMAND 15 KEGS OF ALCOHOL AND 3 DUFFLE BAGS OF YOUR WEED YOU SON OF A BITCH!" yelled the toad.

"Three bags that bullshit!" yelled Naruto before Gamakichi slammed him against the ground twenty more times.

"NOW ITS 20 KEGS AND 4 DUFFLE BAGS!" Roared the toad. "YOU WANT TO KEEP THIS SHIT UP?" Gamakichi asked shaking the blonde.

"Sigh, he's definitely Gamabunta's son alright." Said Jiraiya on the sideline as Gamakichi and Naruto reached an agreement and the toad threw the ninja high into the air. "Boy has got his anger." He said as Naruto came crashing down.

"Ow!" groaned Naruto as he laid on the ground.

"Why didn't you just sprout wings?" the sage asked poking him with a stick.

"Because if I didn't hit the ground Gamakichi might get pissed off again." He said as he slowly slipped into unconsciousness

End flashback…With Naruto.

"OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHIT! OH SHIT!" Naruto said sprinting down the street all the while dodging attacks from the furious blonde girl.

"COME BACK HERE AND TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT LIKE A MAN!" she yelled at the boy.

"I RATHER RUN AWAY LIKE A LITTLE GIRL!" Naruto said quickly jumping as Yami swung a spiked ball and chain at him.

"YARGH!" screamed the alien girl as she threw a manhole cover at him.

Clang! Smack! Crash! Thud! The manhole cover collided with Naruto's head sending him flipping down the street and crashing into a lingerie store and destroying the changing rooms.

"Ow!" moaned Naruto as he sat up only to find himself shaking in fear as he saw about ten women covering themselves. He got up and slowly backed up.

"Get him!" screamed a random woman.

"Ah!" cried Naruto trying to run away until he was tripped by Yami's hair. "Sweetheart why?!" he asked the girl.

"Because you're a hentai!" Yami shouted as the women descended on him and beat the shit out of him.

Later in the alley behind the store…

"And stay out you pervert!" yelled a woman as she and the other women threw him into a dumpster.

Naruto groaned as he pulled himself out of the dumpster. He took a few steps until he collapsed on the ground. He laid there motionless until a shadow loomed over him.

"Hey pervert you alive?" said Yami as she poked him with a strand of her hair.

"Leave me the hell alone woman!" cried Naruto as he laid face first in the dirt. "Oof!" he grunted when Yami kicked him in the gut.

"Oh good you're alive I thought they might have killed you" the girl said flipping him over. "I'm the one who going to kill you Naruto Uzumaki so you better stay alive." She said to the boy and then punching him in the gut when his eyes wonder to her panties.

"Why don't you just kill me now?!" Yelled Naruto as the girl walking to an area so he wouldn't see her underwear.

"Because it's funny to see you run away like a little girl." Yami said stifling a laugh making the boy gain a tick mark on his head.

"Oh yeah let's see you keep your cool when you have someone like you chasing you, you she-devil!" Naruto said shooting up quickly and then losing his balance and falling on top of the girl.

"Oh no!" thought Naruto as his hands were on Yami's breast and ass. "Let's look at my options here" Naruto thought as time seemed to slow when the adrenaline went through his system. "I know that no matter what I do Sweetheart is going to beat the shit out of me,…..Fuck it I'll take a page out of Ero-Sennin's book" he thought as he felt the girl up. She was going to beat the shit out of him regardless, he might as well live a little before he dies.

"YOU ECCHI BASTARD!" yelled the girl as she threw her fists and hair at the boy making him cry out agony as she destroyed him. She walked away blushing and covering herself, leaving Naruto in a twisted and crumpled mess. Once the girl left a new shadow appear over the boy.

"Hahahaha!" Bellowed Jiraiya as he appeared over the boy with his book bag "So tell me brat how does it feel to walk in my shoes?" he asked as he untangled his student's limbs.

"Honestly while the whole ordeal was painful as all hell…her breasts were really soft, so it was worth the pain." Naruto said making his master grin proudly, as he shot up like nothing happen. "And you're right laying on the ground like your half death makes them stop their assault a lot sooner" he said popping a few joint to get the stiffness out.

"Yes the 'Half Dead' technique has lessen many beat downs I received during my lifetime," Jiraiya said sagely "But I warn you not to use it on women that beat you a lot, Tsunade has learn of it and that's why I run from her" he said crossing his arms.

"That's because you're too stupid to stop peeping" stated Naruto glaring at his sensei.

"You are one to talk boy!" shouted the man as grabbed the boy by the shirt. "How many times have you been in perverted situations in the last month alone?" the man asked.

"Those were accident that happen randomly or you stage you bastard!" Naruto yelled. "I never actively peep on women like you do!" he said making the sage let go of him.

"Hmph, whatever you little prude, just hurry up and get to school" said the sage turning around and walking away.

"Fine" said Naruto switching his clothes and grabbing his bag. Then something came to his mind. "Hey sensei?" he asked.

"What is it brat?!" the man said.

"How does one become one with nature?" his student asked.

"You become a Sage, why do you ask?" Jiraiya said curiously.

"Kyuubi said I need to become way stronger because the Akatsuki found the body of the Juubi and the way fuzzbutt was acting it can't be good." Naruto said making the Toad Sage pale.

"So that is their plan" Jiraiya said seriously. "Brat it seems I going to have to accelerate your training by a few years. Let me get in contact with a few people then we'll start training you in the arts of being a sage." He stated. "Now hurry up and get to school before your fiancé blows it up."

"Aw shit you right I better hurry!" Naruto said taking off in a blur.

"Hmm I think I should start training him in sealing so he can also start trying to solve that also" Jiraiya said pulling out a three prong Kunai and examine the writing on it.

….. Later in the day at Seinan High school.

"Man I hate this day" Bang! Naruto groaned as he slammed his head against his desk. Frist the frightening experience with Yami happened. Then as soon as he got to school he got yelled at Yui for not only being late but leaving her alone with Lala who decided to use an updated version of Pyon-pyon Warp-kun to transport the two of them to school…..Naked….In front of the Principal…enough said.

Then he and Rito had to go around the school chasing some super hyper and perverted rats as Lala had spray them with an aerosol version of Berserker DX causing them to crazy and become blurs as they bit guys and went up girls skits, he and Rito still had bite marks across their skin. And while he was chasing the rodents he ended up in the library and crashing into Yami as she looking for books to read, this time he just got on his hands and knees and let her beat the shit out of him. So yeah his day was just perfect!

"Hey did you hear?" Mio started as she and Risa walked into the classroom.

"Sounds like there a new rumor in the school" thought Naruto and the rest of the class.

"There's a new ghost story rumor going around!" finished Risa.

Bang! "Oh fuck me!" the blonde Ninja screamed in his as he slammed his head on the desk again. Yui just patted her boyfriend's back as she got up to go the bathroom.

"What?!" Haruna said going pale.

"Did you say ghost?! Like monster stuff?!" Lala said getting excited.

"Yeah they say there's been a recent sighting at the old school building." Explain Mio.

"Isn't that just a rumor? There's no such thing as ghosts anyways" Rito said speaking with logic.

Naruto just whimpered as with his life he knew better.

"But it's really true! Haven't you heard strange noises from there?" Risa said a little miffed.

"There are even people who have heard a ghastly voice saying GET OUT!" said Mio making a creepy voice.

"Then let's go see for ourselves!" cheered Lala.

"Yeah let's go Lala-chi" agreed Risa.

At this point Naruto was quietly making his way out of the room, no way in hell was he getting involved with anything to do with ghosts. He was almost out of the room when Risa got a mischievous look on her face and whispered something in Lala's ear.

"Wait Naruto-kun you're coming with us too!" Lala shouted.

"OH HELL NO!" Naruto shouted making a run for it.

"Oh no you don't! Go Spinning Spunning rope-kun 2!" Lala said pulling out her D-Dial and calling out the repaired and improved invention.

Snap!

"AH FUCK!" Screamed the Ninja as the alien device entangled him "Let me go damnit!" he yelled in frustration. "Rrrraah!" he roar trying to get out only to find he couldn't break free.

"No can do Naruto-kun you're coming with us." Lala said throwing the bound boy of her shoulder. "And stop your struggling I've upgraded Spinning Spunning rope-kun's design, even Daddy would have trouble getting out of it now." She said proudly.

"Oh come on this bullshit, this kidnapping! Why the hell is no one doing anything!?" Naruto yelled as he flopped like a fish on Lala's shoulder. "I demand a lawy-mmmpth!" he was about to into another rant when out of nowhere Risa strapped a ball gag to his face. "HMMMPH?!"

"Risa?" Rito said looking at the dirty blonde hair girl sweatdropping.

"What? He was going to keep going on and on, I had to shut him up somehow." Explained Risa.

"I think what Rito-kun meant, why were you carrying around a ball gag?" Haruna asked the girl.

"Oh I had planned to use it later in the week" her friend said putting her hands behind her head. "Hey Lala-chi can I borrow this?" Risa said poking and the alien rope.

"NO/MMMPTH!" shouted everyone but Lala as they left the room.

A few minutes later inside the old school building on the second floor…

"Hellooooo mister ghost are you there?" Lala shouted hoping to draw out some sprits.

"MMMMMMM!/Stop shouting you'll wake them up!" cried the still bound Naruto on her shoulder.

"Lala-chan you don't have to call out to them." Haruna said cowering behind Risa, she would've been behind Rito but currently the boy was guarding the rear thus she had to settle for her friend.

Thump!

"AHHHHHHH!" Screamed Haruna at the top of her lungs making everyone jump and for Naruto to double his effort to get free.

Creak! Creak! Creak! Footsteps sounded behind the door making everyone go stiff.

"Wait is someone actual behind the door?!" Risa said backing up and dragging Haruna with her.

As the door slowly opened Rito in an act of bravery threw himself at the figure in the doorway. "Everyone run away now before it's too late!" he yelled holding onto the being tightly. He closed his eyes waiting to be tore apart by the spirit, like they did in every horror movie out there. A few seconds later he opened his eyes and found his friends stare at in owlishly, although Naruto for some reason looked at him in horror and was that pity!?

"Yami-chan!" Lala said cheerfully as she greeted the person in his arms.

Rito looked down and blushed up a storm as his right hand was firmly grasping the left breast of a blonde fourteen year old girl. "Huh?!"

"I hate, ECCHI PEOPLE!" Huffed Yami as a golden fist of hair plowed into Rito's face.

"OW…I-I didn't mean to." Groaned Rito on the ground.

"Yami-chan what are you doing in a place like this?" Lala asked the girl.

"Princess I just came here because there are a lot of old books here and I wanted to read them, plus when I was in the school library a certain someone rushed in and tackled me." Yami said glaring at a certain bound ninja who was sweatdropping. "Are you here to dispose of Uzumaki? If so I can take care of that for you." She questioned as her hair formed a sharp blade.

"MMMMMPTH!" squeal Naruto trying once again to break free, but now for a totally different reason.

"Hey isn't that the girl who was hanging around the school all day?" asked Mio.

"Yeah didn't she beat the crap out of the principal?" said Risa.

"This is Yami-chan or Sweetheart as Naruto calls her isn't she cute?" Lala asked.

"Yeah she sure is Lala-chi" Risa said as she and Mio glopped the confused blonde.

"Kyaa her skin's so soft!" squealed Mio.

"Hey Yami-Yami, how were you able to do that punch earlier with your hair? Are you a ninja like Naruto-kun or an alien like Lala-chi?" Risa said running her hand through Yami's golden hair.

At Naruto could only sweatdrop "They're treating an interstellar assassin like a teddy bear." He chuckled to himself as he saw Yami's twitching eyebrow as Risa and Mio started to get a little grabbing. All of a sudden a presence appear putting both Naruto and Yami on edge as Yami got out of the perverted girls' grasps in a burst of speed and reappeared in front of everyone.

"What's wrong Yami-chan?" Lala said curiously.

"Something's here." The assassin said staring down the hallway. Whatever was down there was not in a good mood.

"THERE YOU ARE!" Shouted a very miffed voice of a girl.

"Wait I know that pissed off sounding voice" Risa said, she heard it many of times.

"Not only are you breaking the law but you're all endangering yourselves! There a reason this building is listed as condemned!" shouted the person coming into the light reveling herself to be one Yui Kotegawa.

"Aww it just Yui-neechan" Lala said putting her hands behind her head but forgetting she was holding Naruto thus dropping him on his head.

Thud! "OW!"

"Don't talk to me in such calmed tone you're in trouble!" shouted Yui in frustration. "Trespassing, breaking and entering…Kidnapping." She said listing the laws they had broken and adding the last one as she looked at the bound ninja.

"Kidnapping?" questioned Lala.

"Does it look like Naruto-kun is here of his own will?" the discipline committee member said pointing at the boy who had found an old piece of metal and was sawing at the alien rope.

Crack!

"Waaaaaaa!" Whimpered Naruto as the lesser earth broke against the Deviluke grade material.

"Oh poor Naru-kun here let me take off that shameless thing" Yui said reaching down to a starry eyed Naruto, never noticing Risa and Mio cover their ears.

"NOW GET ME OUT OF THESE FUCKING ROPES, FOR GOD'S FUCKING SAKE! AND WHY FOR IN THE NAMES OF THE SEVEN HELLS ARE WE IN THIS FUCKING HAUNTED BUILDING!" shouted Naruto at the top of his lungs.

"Got it out of your system?" Yui asked plainly.

"I think so." Huffed Naruto.

"Good" the black hair girl said nodding before she slapped the shit out of him. "You yell like that again I'll throw Judgment-kun at your balls you hear me you caveman!"

"Yes dear." The boy said bowing his head in submission no way did he want the dictionary of fucking pain throw at his family jewels.

"He has the power to level entire city block yet the threat of being hit by a book makes him as meek as a five year old." Mio mused.

"Yui-chan has him whipped" laughed Risa.

"GET OUT! …GET OUT... GET OUT!" said a menacing voice.

"Lala-chan turn off your machine and stop pranking everyone!" Shouted Yui.

"It's not me..." Lala said innocently.

"W-wait if it isn't you then." Yui snapped head to look at Naruto, he just look at her with the gravest face she had ever seen him wear. "I-its real!" she stuttered as the reality of the situation hit her.

Creak! Crack!

"AAAAHHHHHHHH! /SON OF A BITCH!" yelled everyone except Naruto who just cursed as the floor below them collapse making them fall to the first floor.

"OWWWW!" Groaned Naruto as he laid on the ground, he tried his best to sit up only to find that he couldn't as something most pleasant was sitting on him. "When did you get pink panties Yui-chan?" he said staring at his girlfriend's ass that was five inches from his face.

"Naruto you pervert!" Yui squeaked as she jumped up pulling the blonde to his feet and punching him in the face. It didn't hurt but it got the point across. "Honestly whenever I met this Tsunade person I'm reporting to her all the perverted things you done!" she huffed making the blonde boy pale.

"Please don't do that Yui-chan she'll kill me!" Naruto begged doing the best he could to bow.

"Well I'm glad to see everyone is alright!" Lala said cheerfully seeing that all her friends were fine.

"Good I was afraid someone would have gotten hurt from the fall" Naruto said as amazingly got to his feet. "So now that we got this all settled…..Get me out of these binds Lala-chan!" he growled.

"Umm I forgot how to disengage them." Lala said sheepishly.

"Instructions manuals Lala, goddamn instruction manuals!" the blonde shouted before sighing. "Sweetheart could you be a dear?" he ask his fellow blonde.

"Fine" Yami sigh forming a blade from her hand.

Slash! Thud!

"Oh god that feels so much better!" Naruto said stretching and getting a satisfying pop from somewhere. "Thank you Sweetheart I owe you one."

"Buy me some taiyaki" Yami stated immediately. Apparently she likes all debt settled as soon as possible.

"Why do I have a feeling taiyaki is to you what ramen is to me?" the ninja said sweatdropping. He also had a feeling that the two of them might come to blows over which food was better.

Puroan!

"AHHHH!" Screamed Haruna as a piano done the hall started playing.

"Haruna-chan what wrong!?" asked Rito as the girl grabbed him for comfort.

"J-just now I heard a piano being played!" cried the girl burying her face in the now blushing boy's chest.

"Hello who in here?" Lala said opening the door to the music room with no hesitation.

Puroan! Puroan! The piano in the room started to play rapidly so much in fact that it start to move.

"Lala-chan run!" Shouted Naruto grabbing the alien girl's hand as the piano all of a sudden went flying towards the door.

"AHHHHHHHHH!" screamed the teens as the musical instrument chased after them

Snap! Snap! Snap! Went the keyboard cover of the piano as it gain speed on them.

"Screw this!" Yelled Naruto charging up a Rasengan.

BOOOOM!

"Ha take that Casper!" Cheered Naruto as he pulled his hand out of the wreckage!

"Is that the best you got!?" Growled a voice behind them.

Crash!

"AHHHH!" screamed Lala as a tentacle burst out the room and grabbed her and squeezed her tail rendering her powerless.

"Princess!" Yami shouted going to save her only to go limp as the slimly tentacle grabbed her.

"GUHEHEHE!" laughed a one eye squid monster.

"I can't take it anymore" Haruna said passing out.

"We can't either!" Risa and Mio said passing out also.

"Crap this is bad, come on Naruto!" Rito said looking back at Naruto only to pale as Naruto was in a cationic state and was frothing at the mouth. "Naruto come on man snap out of it!" he said slapping his friend only to sweatdrop as the blonde went limp.

"It no use" Yui yelled.

"What?!" Rito asked.

"Naruto is deathly afraid of ghost." Explained Yui as reached over and pulled Naruto into her arms. "I guess it was too much and he passed out."

"Fine then I'll try to free Lala-chan and Yami you try to wake him up!" Rito said as he grabbed an old chair. "Raaghhh!" he yelled rushing for the monster.

Wham! Thud!

"OW!" Groaned Rito as he flew across the room and crashed into the next room.

"Rito-kun are you okay?!" Yui shouted in concern.

"Yeah" Spit "I'm okay" Rito said standing up.

"HOW ARE YOU STILL AWAKE!? ANYONE ELSE WOUND'VE BEEN KNOCKED OUT!" asked the one eyed monster surprised.

"Hehe I suffer blows worse than that whenever I trip, that was nothing!" Rito said running across the room, jump up and smashed the chair on top of the creature's head.

"Gahhh!" roared the creature as the human smacked him in the eye. He whipped a tentacle in blind fury managing to smack Rito again only this time the boy somehow landed on his feet.

"Huh?" he said looking down. "How did I not end up on my back?" He thought as he look at Yui who was blinking at him in shock. "Well I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth."He said to himself as he rushed the creature again.

Wham! Crack!

This he smack the creature in the mouth actually breaking a tooth but unfortunately also the chair.

"GRAGGGH!"Yelled the squid smacking Rito again and sending him flying to the wall behind Haruna although this time he was finally knocked out.

"Rito-kun!" yelled Lala and Yui. Yami contorted her face in rage as she hated seeing someone getting her for her sake, and she was helpless to do anything.

"What's going on in here?!" Yelled a werewolf creature as he and a gaggle of creatures stepped into the room.

"Typical when all the work is done you guys finally show up!" yelled the squid creature.

"Sorry we all just woke up from a bad hangover." Explained a Cyclops creature rubbing the back of his neck.

"I don't care hurry up and knock out that girl so we can get them out of here!" Growled the one eyed creature pointing at Yui.

"Alright fine" said the werewolf stepping forward. "Okay human just stand still and we'll make this easy."

Woosh! Pow!

"You'll have to get pass me first!" said a now awake Naruto jumping up and popping the werewolf in the jaw.

"Naruto-kun!" Shouted Lala and Yui in joy.

"But how are you?" Yui said confused.

"Because I couldn't let something like fear to allow me just to sit and do nothing as my friends to get hurt." Naruto said looking at himself in a mirror shard in disgust. He vowed right then and there he would never himself to become lower than trash ever again!

"About time you woke up you idiot" Rito said standing up shakily.

"I'm sorry Rito should have never froze like that" Naruto said hanging his head in shame.

"It's okay Naruto," Rito said putting his hand on his friend's shoulder and smiling showing the blonde he forgave him. "You got remember I'm the guy who practical afraid of girls, besides I got to feel like a badass for once." He said smirking.

"If that's the case you want to finish this up?" Naruto asked cheekily.

"Hell no I'm tagging you in!" Rito said slapping Naruto's hand and letting his legs collapse below him.

"Good I want to beat on these guys for making them think they're ghost anyways" Naruto said cracking his knuckles.

"Wait they're not ghost?" Asked Yui confused.

"Have you ever heard of ghost getting hangovers?" Naruto said quirking an eyebrow making everyone sweatdrop.

"What does it matter if were ghost or not we still outnumber you ten to one!" shouted the Cyclops.

The ninja just smirked as he put his hand into a 't' "Shadow clone justu!"

POOF!

"Alright boys sic'em!"

POW! BANG! CRASH! CRUSH! "AAAAAAAHHHHH!" BOOOM!

"Oh!" groaned the monsters as laid on the ground in pain.

"Aw I was kind of hopping they were ghost" Lala pouted.

"Sorry Princess but it seems as though these are all visitors from outer space." Explained Yami.

"But I don't recognize any of them?" Lala said confused as she has seen millions of different species.

"That is because all our home systems were destroyed by the DESTORYER over two thousand years ago as it was hunting down the last of the Oni." The werewolf looking alien said sadly and then spitting on the ground as soon as the word 'Oni' left his mouth making the three awake humans wonder how he knew about human mythology. "It's been so long since the Dark Times that I'm not surprised that one of the ruling race would know about the plight of those who live in the Refugee systems." He stated.

Once Yami heard this she hung her head as a shadow cast over face.

"We had to leave due to overcrowding in order to find a new place to live and work." Said the Cyclops.

"Yes I did hear Daddy saying that he planned on sending scout ships to look for either Garden world or planets suitable for terraforming." Lala said remembering back to the week before she left home.

"Wait your Daddy? The only person to be reported of sending scout ships is…you can't be!" shouted the werewolf.

"So now you know who you were messing with." Said a woman stepping into the room making Yami's eyes widen in recognition.

"Yo how is it going Mikado-sensei." Naruto greeted none other than the bombshell School Nurse Ryouko Mikado as she examined Rito and the awakened others for any injuries.

"Mikado as in the famous Doctor Mikado" the squid alien said remembering the rumors of the saintly doctor who charge very little for those of the Refugee systems.

"You poor guys you were all preoccupied with protecting your new home that you didn't realize who you messing with." Mikado said smirking.

"What?!" said all the alien except the werewolf who already knew who Lala was.

"The pink hair one is none other than Princess Lala Satalin Deviluke the heir to the throne, the girl in black is Golden Darkness, the assassin. And I believe you're already acquainted with Naruto Uzumaki-kun who is quite possible the next King of the universe given that King Gid Deviluke approves of him." Mikado said chuckling at the aliens expressions.

"PLEASE DON'T KILL US!?" begged the aliens.

"What? I would never do something like that!" Lala said cheerfully.

"Meh you guys were just trying to protect your home." Naruto said waving them off.

"So you're not mad at us for hurting your friend?" asked the squid.

Naruto leaned in "Look at him he's in heaven." He whispered as Rito was being fawned over by Haruna and chuckled as the boy's head exploded in steam as Haruna kissed him on the cheek.

The alien blushed blue "Well I'm glad I could be of assistance."

"Well now that we're all friends I'm afraid you lot can't stay here. I mean living here is pretty unfavorable don't you think?" Mikado said.

"Eh? But where else are we supposed to live there not many places that we can live!?" shouted the Cyclops.

"Kukukuku don't you worry I know of a certain alien managing a theme park here on Earth. You guys are perfect for the haunted house that they are redesigning, and you're also lucky for the fact that he is also from the Refugee system so he'll treat you fairly." The alien Doctor smiled seeing the joyous face of the aliens.

"YATTA! Well what are we waiting for let's go!" cheer the werewolf as Mikado lead them out of the room.

"See you Oshizu-chan sorry for being such a bother!" Called the Cyclops cheerfully.

"Heh who are they calling to?" Risa said in confusion until a bluish glow appeared behind her.

"Goodbye everyone I enjoyed your company and I wish you good luck!" said a voice of a young girl behind her.

"AHHHHHHHH/NEVER FUCKING DOUBT ME AGAIN!" shouted/cursed everyone and Naruto.

"Ah hello" Greeted a ghost who look to be a girl of sixteen. "Sorry for surprising you like that, I'm Oshizu Murasame and I died here four hundred years ago."

"Ah a ghost a real freaking ghost!" Naruto shouted drawing the ghost girl's attention.

"Why hello again Ashura-sama I apologies as I didn't recognize you in your current form" Oshizu said bowing in front of Naruto.

Thud! Thud!

Once again both Haruna and Naruto passed out causing everyone to sweatdrop.

"Hehehe just like all of Ashura-sama's previous reincarnations he could never handle dealing with the supernatural the first go around." Laughed Oshizu at the blond boy who was frothing at the mouth, making everyone wonder what was going to happen next.

Elemental Nations, on the edge of the borders of the Land of Wind…..

"I was expecting Sasori-sama himself not…whatever you are" Said a Sand Jonin Captain named Yuura as he stared at the robot that had a Red Scorpion painted of each shoulder.

[You be amazed how far Sasori-sama's genius has advanced by being away from these wretched lands.] Said the first of Sasori's Veil creations Saisho.

"Wretched lands?" Yuura said slightly offended.

[Sorry my kind are used to being surround by towers of metal and road of concrete, not to mention the lack of internet access save for the stray satellite signal. And that for some of us it is very stressful.] Saisho said oildropping at the sight of one of his brothers smacking his head against a rock.

Smack!

[I lost the fucking signal! I'm cut off from the trend loop!] Cried a robot unit with two large antennas attached to his back.

[Yeah so if you would kindly point out the key location of the village] Saisho said point at a map that Yuura had brought with him.

"The key shelters are here, here, here, here and here." Yuura said point at the map. "The main housing area is here, the academy is here and the hospital is here."

[Beside the shelters everything has pretty much stayed the same, this continent is indeed stagnant] Saisho said shaking his head [In about two decades not a damn thing has change according to Sasori-sama]

"People are always stuck in their ways here what can I say?" the human said shrugging.

Slash! Thud!

[Nothing would be preferable] saidSaisho as he cut off Yuura's head and threw it behind him where it was caught by another robot.

Crack!

The robot proceeded to crack open Yuura's skull take out his brain and put it inside a compartment in the twenty-five foot tall robot behind him.

[GRAAOOOOAAA!] Roared the massive machine as it came online.

[How many CHIMERAS does that make for the invasion Doc?] Saisho asked the bloodied robot.

[Well we grab those three bandits, then that missing-nin and now with this meatbag's donation that makes five.] Doc said listing off all the people whose skulls he cracked open.

[It will have to do, our deadline is tomorrow.] Saisho stated.He turned around and walked into a clearing in the forest where he saw one hundred pairs of red eyes staring back. . [Soon we will see who is better man or machine!] He shouted.

Everyone in the Sand village felt a chill run up their spines as they heard in the distance [IT IS MACHINE!]

…..

Next chapter Man Vs Machine- Invasion of the Sand Village!

Fuck now I got to write a full invasion sequence…..SHIT! Well wish me luck!

Please fav and review!