Title: In Your Eyes

Authors: Raven Shadowrose/BeethovenRIP

Rating: M

Pairing: ?/?

Summary: A joint FanFic by Raven Shadowrose and BeethovenRIP based on Dixie and Jeff's conversation at the end of Series 26 Episode 36. We have rated it M as future chapters will contain adult themes. Dixie wants to be a mother and Jeff is all too willing to oblige, but, does their conversation in the ED have an unexpected effect on their relationship?

Disclaimer: The authors do not know or own any characters or content from Casualty, any original characters and the story are ours and we do not give permission for anyone to use the story or reproduce it.

Author's Note: Thank you to chan. nelson4444 and olivia. c. king1 for your reviews, Tamzin is quite the hated woman right now it seems, enjoy :)

Chapter Nineteen.

Jeff woke up slowly the following morning as the light streamed through his curtains. He rubbed his eyes and stretched before turning over to snuggle up to Dixie, but, she wasn't there next to him. He stroked the empty space that was beside him and thought back over the previous day. It had worried him to come home to find out that Dixie had cried herself to sleep without him, why was she so upset? Dixie never cried, she always maintained her composure, what had got to her so much that she had let her guard down? Jeff wasn't convinced that him being late home would have done it, he had arrived home late many a time before and she hadn't even battered an eyelid about it. What had made last night so different? Deep down he knew he had to get to the bottom of it, he couldn't bear the thought of Dixie being upset or crying on her own without him there to hold her, but, he also knew her too well, she would fob him off with something. Dixie wasn't going to admit there was anything wrong easily, he would have to coax it out of her, but, he would get to the bottom of it sooner or later.

Dixie shut off the shower standing on the mat drying herself off, she looked at her ageing body one more time in the mirror, Jeff's words echoed through her ears loud and clear, he thought she was beautiful and loved her no matter what. Dixie continued to look at herself, did he really think that? Is there any truth in what Tamzin said about men who cheat? Would Jeff cheat on me? Dixie thought back over yesterday's shift especially seeing Tamzin flirting with Jeff, how much longer would she do it before he succumbed and jumped into her bed? Dixie could feel fresh tears forming in her eyes as she imagined Jeff with Tamzin instead of her, she would blame herself if he did that, it would be her fault entirely, her fault for being old, for being overweight, for waiting so long to acknowledge her feelings for him. No. Jeff would not do that, would he?

Dixie wrapped herself in the towel securing it tightly just in front of her left arm; she would go and see if Jeff was awake before she went to get dressed. 'Morning Dixie.' Jeff said as he saw her walk in from the bathroom, waiting for her to get a little closer, Jeff jumped out of his bed and went straight over to her, taking her into his arms holding her close. 'I am sorry I was late home last night Dix, I didn't mean to make you upset, please forgive me.'
'Its OK Jeff, honestly, you do not need to explain yourself to me.' Dixie said as convincingly as she could. 'Then why were you crying?' Jeff asked tenderly looking into her deep blue eyes for an answer. 'I don't know love, just came from nowhere. I think it was because I was tired and worrying about today that's all.'
'Why? What's going on today?' Jeff asked clueless.
'Performance Appraisals Jeffrey. Jason is coming over to help me out as we have to think about disciplinary for Dom don't we.' Dixie responded moving her head onto Jeff's shoulder as she held him tighter. 'Also, he will be doing your appraisal as I am not allowed to do it any more.'
'You have always done my appraisal Dix, why can't you now?'
'Because we are married Jeff and in a relationship, it all has to be done above board.'

Dixie went to move out of Jeff's embrace so she could get ready for the day, but, he wasn't letting go. 'Jeffrey, come on, we need to get ready for work.'
'Do you honestly think I am going to let you walk out of here when you are stood in front of me in nothing but a towel?' Dixie let out a small moan as Jeff started to place small kisses upon her neck before he spoke again, 'How about we do my performance appraisal now Mrs Collier. It seems such a shame to waste Jason's time.' Dixie giggled as Jeff returned to kissing her neck, she felt his hands wonder across her body as they settled once more on her waist pulling her in as he kissed her slowly.
'Jeffrey stop it, we don't have time.'
'Yes we do, come on, appraise my performance now.' Jeff said as he pushed Dixie back onto his bed releasing the towel exposing her naked body to him. 'Oh Mrs Collier, you are one hot lady.' Dixie found herself moaning again as Jeff caressed her breasts, 'you cannot resist me, and you know you want to give me a good appraisal Mrs Duty Manager, so, appraise this.' Jeff said as he slipped his hard length inside.

The couple arrived at the Ambulance Station ready for their day; they were sat in Dixie's office enjoying a cup of tea waiting for their shift to properly begin. Dixie was sorting out files ready for Jason and the appraisals while Jeff read through the rotas. 'Why her Dix? Of all the Paramedics here you had to pair me with Tamzin again.' Jeff complained.
'I thought you got on all right with her.'
'Yeah, but, it doesn't mean I have to work with her all the time does it?'
'You work with me all the time Jeffrey.'
'You are the exception Mrs Collier; I am in love with you.' Jeff smiled at Dixie who returned it, it made her feel loved, Jeff was doing a really good job so far of showing her how much she meant to him, Dixie had almost forgotten Tamzin's comment about cheating, Jeff had showed her that morning that he wasn't going to go anywhere. She hadn't even noticed Jeff had started talking again. 'What was that love?'
'I said, I would rather work with Norman.'
'You can't, he isn't on shift until tonight.'
'Well, you are going to have to give me an incentive to get through the day then aren't you.' Jeff said seductively as he got up walking over to Dixie who gave him a kiss before he headed off for his day. Dixie watched Jeff leave, had she just made a mistake?

Jeff's shift with Tamzin was going anything but quickly, whenever he was apart from Dixie time seemed to drag for him and he hated it. He wondered how the appraisals were going, it was always hard on Dixie having to go down competency routes with certain Paramedics who were not up to the job, she always took it personally and would question her own skills as the boss. She would ask Jeff is she had let them down in some way; he would always do her best to reassure her she was wrong. 'Holby control to 3008.'
'3008 go ahead.'
'RTC on Holby Interchange, car versus crash barrier, male driver trapped and a female passenger wondering across the carriage way. Reports of another vehicle involved.'
'3008 all received and mobile over.' Jeff clipped the radio back onto his belt as he started the engine waiting for Tamzin to close the doors and join him. He hadn't really spoken to her since their shift started, but, he was already getting fed up with her constant need to try and touch him. He was starting to wonder how much more he could take before he told her to stop. 'You take the one in the car Tamzin, I am going to check out the other vehicle.' Jeff instructed as he jumped out the ambulance grabbing his kit.

Tamzin watched Jeff race over to the other car, she admired his body, for a man in his early forties, he was extremely good looking, she wondered what he saw in Dixie and why he was so intent to ignore her. Now was the perfect time to put her plan into action, she would be alone treating a male patient, time to put Jeff's protective nature of women to the test.

Tamzin's scream was enough to stop Jeff dead in his tracks; he had collared the other casualty and had just placed an oxygen mask on his face as he raced up the bank to Tamzin. He could see her struggling with the other casualty, she was clearly distressed. 'Tamzin, hey, are you all right?' Jeff asked as he approached the pair, as soon as she saw him approaching, Tamzin dropped the collar and ran straight to Jeff wrapping her arms around him burying her head into his chest mock sobbing into it. She felt Jeff hug her back as she continued to pretend cry taking in his scent and comfort of his strong arms. This was all too short lived as he pulled away walking over to the male casualty to find out what was going on. 'He threatened me Jeff; he touched me and freaked me out. I was only trying to collar him and he just lashed out at me.' Tamzin spat out hurriedly as Jeff tried to calm the situation down. Jeff turned to face Tamzin,

'Go and sit in the ambulance Princess and take some deep breaths, we will sort this out, don't you worry.' Tamzin nodded turning on her heel walking away slowly maintaining the appearance of being distraught but smiling to herself, her plan was well and truly in motion, all she had to do was play vulnerable some more when they wrote their statements. Jeff would be in her bed by the end of the day, she was certain of it.

Jeff wasn't quite sure what had gone on back at the RTC, the male casualty claimed he never laid a finger on Tamzin while Jeff was treating him in the back of the ambulance, he claimed she was the one being rude and aggressive towards him, Jeff didn't know what to think, all he knew was he had to write his statement based on what he knew, what he saw.
'What you writing?' Tamzin asked as she walked into the Rec room.
'My pre-emptive statement.'
'What are you going to say on it?' Tamzin asked making sure her voice sounded shaky for added impact as she took the seat next to Jeff.
'I don't know Tamzin, something doesn't add up, are you sure you are remembering it all correctly?' Jeff asked. He didn't want her to think he didn't believe what she said, but he had to be sure. Dixie would go over the statements with a fine tooth comb and if it turned out he had written something down incorrectly, he would be for the high jump. 'Jeff, I am not lying to you, he was aggressive towards me, threatened to hurt me and touched me. He really scared me Jeff.' Tamzin was openly crying now, she wasn't holding back. All the time she maintained eye contact with Jeff seeing how he would react, it pleased her to see his concerned look, she was succeeding. 'OK, I believe you Tamzin.' Jeff said quietly as he picked up his pen once more. Tamzin moved off the chair to give Jeff a hug.
'Thank you Jeff, that means so much to me.' Now was her perfect opportunity.

Dixie had just written up the last of the appraisals, Jason had left some time ago telling her he would be back in the morning to complete the appraisals with her. She wondered what kind of day Jeff had had without her; she had been so busy that she hadn't seen or heard from him in nearly 12 hours. Deciding she needed a coffee, Dixie made her way to the Rec room. As she got to the archway, she stopped dead in her tracks, mouth hanging open at what she was seeing in front of her. She couldn't move, she was rooted to the spot, tears streaming down her face. She tried to talk but nothing came out. Dixie couldn't comprehend the scene in front of her; it was ripping her heart in two. Jeff was sat on the chair with his back to her, Tamzin had her arms around him, their lips were locked in a rather passionate kiss. Dixie started to feel sick, her Jeffrey, her precious Jeffrey was kissing Tamzin, her worst fears had become a reality. Tears streaming hard down her face, Dixie ran back to her office closing the door behind her sinking to the floor sobbing uncontrollably.

'What the bloody hell do you think you are doing?' Jeff shouted as he pushed Tamzin away from him causing her to stumble back into the corner of the breakfast bar.
'Come on Jeff, you know you want me, you know you enjoyed that.' Tamzin said rubbing her side and edging towards Jeff again. He had, by this time, jumped off his seat and was moving away from her. 'Why the hell would I want you?'
'I am younger, thinner and better looking than the woman you call your wife. I can pleasure you in ways she can't and go for longer.'
'How dare you speak like that about my wife. You may be younger but you are no looker Tamzin. Dixie is twice the person you are and I love her with all my heart and soul. How dare you think you have any chance with me?'
Tamzin stood there in utter shock, no man had ever rejected her advances, this was a first and she didn't like it. Jeff was standing there in a state of shock, had she really just kissed him? What was he going to do now? Worry and fear consumed him; he needed to get out of there and quickly. He felt the all too familiar pounding in his head as he started to lose the sight in his right eye, he had worked himself up so much, a migraine had started. 'You are an evil woman Tamzin, thinking you could play on my sensitive side to take advantage; I could do you for sexual harassment.'
'But you wouldn't, who would believe you Jeff? Let's face it, how would you explain that allegation to your wife? Would she believe you? You have cheated once before.' Jeff knew she was right, would Dixie believe him? What would she say if she knew? He couldn't tell her, Tamzin had him over a barrel, he knew it and so did she. He couldn't take it any more, he needed some pain relief, he needed to get out of there and that is what he did. Tamzin smiled to herself, although her plan to bed Jeff had not been a success, she had seen Dixie appear in the doorway, she knew she had seen them, which in itself was enough, she had succeeded in breaking them up. If she couldn't have Jeff, no one else would either.

Dixie spent the best part of the next hour composing herself before she joined Jeff in the car, he had text her to tell her he was waiting for her whenever she was ready. She honestly didn't know what she was going to say to him would she confront him about it? Dixie decided to play dumb and see how Jeff was with her, if he admitted to it himself, they had a chance of working through it, if he didn't say anything, there was something wrong. The couple spent the rest of the night as normal; no one would ever believe that there was something wrong. Jeff was a little quiet, but, that was due to the thumping headache that pounded his skull, Dixie, on the other hand, cuddled up to her husband in front of the TV before they both went up to bed. 'Shall we sleep in my room tonight Jeff?' Dixie asked as they got to the top of the stairs.
'Can do, I will be in in a minute.' Jeff replied as he went into his own room shutting the door behind him.
Dixie stood in the hallway for a couple of seconds before heading into her own room. She needed to know if Jeff was cheating on her, it was killing her inside. Every time she closed her eyes she could see Jeff kissing Tamzin and it scared her to think he was playing away. She changed into her pyjamas and got into her bed; she had just got herself comfortable when Jeff walked in, turning out the light and getting in beside her. As soon as he was lying down, Dixie moved over to him. She studied his features before leaning in to kiss him. Dixie licked at his lips as Jeff slowly opened his mouth allowing her to caress his tongue with hers. Dixie was getting lost in the moment of kissing her husband as her hand started to wander around his chest lightly stroking his nipple as she worked lower.

Jeff let out a small moan into her mouth as they continued to kiss, as much as he was enjoying this and on any other occasion he would have had her on her back by now, the migraine wasn't going away. He slowly pulled out of the kiss and placed his hand on top of hers looking into her eyes once more. 'Night Princess, sleep well.' With that Jeff gave Dixie a small kiss before turning on his side trying to focus on sleep rather than the sickening throb in his head.

Dixie looked on as her husband turned away from her. She felt rejected. Dixie's heart filled with sadness once more, Jeff was cheating on her if he didn't want to make love to her. Dixie could feel fresh tears forming in her own eyes as she lay on her side away from Jeff, she didn't feel like cuddling up to him if he was going to reject her. This morning had been so perfect; their love making had been intense and passionate, but so perfect. The mood had taken them totally by surprise that they didn't use any protection. Now, she was on her own, Jeff no longer wanted her, he wanted Tamzin. Those fated words echoed in Dixie's ears once more as she cried herself to sleep, 'if a man cheats once, he will do it again.'