A/N: Mickey missing Ian. Set post 5x12. I should probably hide in the corner now...
Mickey took a sip of what felt like the hundredth beer of the night.
His back was starting to go numb from being in the same position for hours.
His mind kept going over and over the things Ian had said to him.
It had been over a week since that horrible day.
Once he had managed to escape from that crazy bitch, Sammi, he had gone home and hadn't seen Ian since. As much as it hurt to admit, he missed the redhead like fucking hell.
He was so sure that if the old Mickey saw him now, he would laugh at his face and tell him to stop being such a little faggot. But what could he do? Mickey wasn't used to being happy and now that he had had the taste of it, it was so hard to move on and go on with his miserable life like before.
Before Ian, he didn't live. He survived.
Ian had been his anchor. Through all the bad times, he had been there for him. When everyone went away, Ian was all he had. When Ian was around, Mickey always forgot how much he loathed himself.
Sure, their relationship wasn't perfect. There was a lot of complicated stuff going on, but he still treasured it, all of it. Because a Milkovich can never be completely happy, so he had to hold on to every little inch of limited happiness he had. But man, had he been happy, like he never thought he could.
"Shit, Mickey, the fuck is wrong with you?" He whispered to himself, as he opened his pack of cigarettes, lit the last one and blew it, willing that smoke to take all his pain away.
Just then he heard the door open, Svetlana bursting with a crying Yevgeny on her arms.
"Mick, get your shit together. I need to work, you take care of baby."
He nodded. She sighed and kissed his cheek.
"Don't be like that, he'll come around eventually." She said, as she handed Yevgeny to him.
He nodded but said nothing. They both knew it wasn't true. With one last sad look, she left.
He tried calming down the baby but he kept sobbing.
"Hey, Yev, please, give me a fucking break. What do you want, huh?" He said, his tone tired, but not lacking affection.
"You've already been fed and I guess you've slept enough." The baby began bouncing his little arms, as if trying to pick something up from the shelf. Mickey's heart sunk as he saw what it was.
Ian's photo. His favorite one of him. But also one that brought back so many shitty memories.
He picked it up, caressed it, and as if realising what he was doing, he dropped it quickly to the bed.
"I know, buddy, I miss him too". Mickey whispered as he pressed a kiss to Yevgeny's forehead and quickly wiped away the single tear that threatened to run down from his eyes.