Chapter 7
For some reason she did not know, Louise woke up the following morning with renewed energy. The world presented itself before her eyes with a different light, and she even felt confident she could conquer everything today.
After donning her male clothes, she had a look at herself in the mirror, and smiled satisfied. Then she put her hat on her head, which completed her new image, and then dashed downstairs. When she was descending the last flight of steps, her mouth broke into a big smile when she discovered the person sitting at the table with Rachel.
"Emma!" she exclaimed happily and ran to hug the woman.
"It's so good to see you, Lullabelle!" Emma enthused, and as she pulled away, she eyed Louise up and down with open curiosity. "Let me have a better look," she said, and dared to take Lou's hat off much in the same way as she had done years ago when she had revealed she knew that Lou was actually Louise. This time Emma also knew the younger woman's secret, because Rachel had already updated her about everything that had been going on. "Oh, Lou, what have you done to your beautiful hair?"
Louise turned around from her, and automatically her eyes directed to the small mirror on the wall that reflected her image while her fingers ran through her short hair over and over again. "It'll grow again. I like it like this. I remember I was happy when I used to wear my hair short, and everything went from bad to worse when I let it grow long."
"Like Samson, but the opposite case."
At Rachel's comment Lou swirled around and asked, "What?"
"Samson was a very strong man back in the old days of the Bible," Emma explained. "His strength was invincible, and came from his long hair. When bad Delilah learned his secret, she cut it all off."
"He lost his extraordinary force," Rachel continued, "and his enemies made him their prisoner. Then years later when his hair grew again, God renewed his strength, and he destroyed the temple and the people who did him wrong."
Louise narrowed her eyes, looking at both women warily. "Are you mocking me?"
"Course not, honey!" Emma said, closing the distance between them. She took Lou by the hand, and steered her to the table. "How could you think something like that?" Emma added as she sat next to Louise. "We're just worried about you."
"Worried? Why?" Lou asked with a frown.
"Louise can fight her own battles; she doesn't need to hide behind Lou," Rachel remarked as she started serving breakfast.
"I ain't hiding," Louise defended herself. "This… this is just for those stupid games." Emma and Rachel shared a skeptical look, and Lou insisted, "It's true. I swear."
"And we believe you," Emma added. "Even with your short hair, you look pretty, doesn't she, Rachel?"
"Totally, and younger. I wish I had your face, Louise."
Lou gave her a small thankful smile, and eager to change the direction of the conversation, she asked, "So, Emma, tell me. How are the twins?"
"Jamie was unwell all last week, but thankfully he got better, and is already looking for trouble. And Annie is as restless as always. I don't know how we didn't wake you up with the ruckus they created just now."
"I slept like a log," Lou replied, smiling. "And where is your offspring now?"
"Sam took them to see Buck's boys."
"This Express family has really grown over the years," Rachel remarked casually as she rocked her baby in her arms.
"Yes," Lou whispered, trying to smile, but a sudden pressure squeezed her chest, and her face cringed when her stomach lurched painfully. After her comment, watching Rachel and her daughter brought back the black clouds. This was not supposed to happen; she should be feeling as happy and confident as she was when she woke up. Knowing she could not pretend before her friends, she looked down and focused on her coffee. The two other women kept talking, and again Lou cursed herself for her lacking.
There were bunches of people gathered in Rock Creek that day. Apparently, curiosity had brought many from other towns and villages. Over the years the Pony Express had come to be a symbol of the young nation, and its riders were considered legendary heroes. It was no wonder people had travelled all the way from their hometowns to lay eyes on those that were their idols, especially Wild Bill Hickok and Buffalo bill.
With this celebration Tompkins was ensuring his re-election as the mayor of Rock Creek. Money was fattening the local businessmen's wallets, and everybody was happy. The two hotels were fully booked, the stables working at full steam, and the restaurants and other shops were filling their money boxes more than ever.
The competition between the riders and the locals took place in the main street. A huge corral had been put up, and dozens of onlookers stood around it to watch. Cody proved that his words from the night before ran true. His performance with the rifle was unparalleled, and amazed everybody. His skill with the lasso had also improved greatly from his Express days, and surpassed the other former riders easily. Yet, he was unable to do as well as Tommy Johnson, one of the locals, who did a spectacular show with the rope.
Then the men had to prove their excellence in horse breaking and revolver shooting. Even though Louise was enjoying the different competitions more than she had thought, she decided to simply stay aside during this one, and instead she watched the men being tossed by the wild stallions chosen for the occasion. She would not stay on top of the horse for too long, and would not look forward to being all sore and stiff tonight after one of those animals threw her onto the ground floor mercilessly. Most men did not stay long enough to even touch the saddle, like Jimmy, who bit the dust a few seconds after he got on the horse. Cody and Buck did much better, but it was Kid who finally managed to remain on top of the stallion the longest. He had learned a lot from Noah's breaking skills in the old days, and he had obviously put them into good practice.
"Congratulations, Kid! Well done!" Jimmy exclaimed when the Southerner left the horse and came up to his friends.
Everybody effusively congratulated Kid, but Lou simply snorted, and muttered under her breath, but loud enough for the comment to reach his ears. "That is hardly fair competition for the rest. What would be expected from someone who works with horses every day?"
Kid cast a dead serious look in her direction, but kept quiet, and after a few seconds he just walked away. Later something similar took place. This time Lou also joined the men to test her proficiency with a gun. It had been too long since she had last had practice, but when she knocked down most of the cans on a fence in the test, she realized that despite everything, she was still quite good. Naturally, like years ago Jimmy and Kid were the best shots, and it was Hickok who got the upper hand, but with the minimum difference. Once again Lou could not control herself and dropped a devious comment about Kid, but now he did not even bother to spare a look in her direction.
That was the last competition for the day. The horse race would be tomorrow, and would be followed by a dance in the evening. So when the trophies were presented to today's winners, the crowd dispersed.
The owner of one of the new fancy restaurants in town approached the ex-riders and offered them a free meal in his elegant establishment. At first, since the invitation did not include the men's families, Rachel, Emma, or Teaspoon, they intended to refuse. Yet, the marshal convinced them it would be a good occasion for the friends to be together and reminisce old times.
Even though Buck, Cody, and Jimmy knew that in the tense situation Lou and Kid were in, dinner would be anything but relaxing and pleasant. However, none of them dared to voice their reservations before the troubled couple. Besides, they suspected that Teaspoon was behind this scheme, and that generous meal Mr. Henderson had kindly offered them would come from Teaspoon's pocket. With all certainty the marshal intended to force Kid and Lou to get closer. So far the couple had been surrounded by too many people, and that encounter had not really happened. Maybe Teaspoon was right, and these two needed a push so that they could at least talk, but the other three former riders foresaw it was not going to be easy.
After freshening up and getting changed into clean clothes, the four men and Lou met at the restaurant. Lou had donned a blue dress and a bonnet that hid her now short hair. The waiter led them to their table, and as it was expected Kid and Lou sat at opposite extremes from each other, separated by their friends.
Contrary to their dreaded expectations, the meal was better than they had imagined. They actually enjoyed a good laugh, retelling their past adventures and mishaps. True to his character, Cody hogged the conversation for the most part, exaggerating his accounts like usual, only pausing to fill his mouth with the food from his plate. Next to him, Lou was strangely in a very talkative mood, which contrasted with Kid's silent mood. Louise kept remembering and bringing out story after story, which incidentally had happened when Kid wasn't around, or she simply left him out of the moment without a single mention to him.
As dessert was being served, Kid decided the night was over for him. Putting up with Lou was proving to be too much. Her comments punctured his heart painfully, and tonight's dinner had not been much easier. Even though she had not flaunted her caustic tongue, her cold looks in his direction and her purposeful blanking him out made him feel like an outsider. It was sad for Kid to realize that it was as if he had not existed in her life, as if he did not even exist, and he could not hold on any longer. Wiping his mouth, he started to rise to his feet. "I'm going now."
"You're leaving? So early?" Cody asked.
Kid simply nodded, and muttered a soft 'good night'.
No sooner had the Southerner taken a couple of steps than Lou's voice resounded behind him. "Let him go. That's the only thing he's really good at."
Kid stopped, slowly turned around, and directed his irritated eyes to her. "It's enough, don't you think, Louise?" he said and with slow steps he came closer so that his body rose above her imposingly. "What on earth do you want from me?"
Lou held her head high proudly. "I don't want anything from you, nothing at all."
"What the hell do you want?" he repeated in a louder tone, which attracted the looks from the people in the restaurant. "Do you want me to beg? That's what you want? Do you want me to beg for your royal forgiveness on my knees? I already did. Remember I did that five years ago, and you turned me down like a mangy dog."
"Kid, let it go," Jimmy tried, but Kid ignored him completely.
"Or maybe what you really want is for me to disappear from this damned world? Is that my sin, Lou? Is that the terrible sin I committed? That I didn't die as you thought? That's why you're so angry because I ain't dead?"
His words felt like a slap across her face. A twinge in her stomach reminding her of other times hit her, and she brought her hand to rub her middle as tears blurred her eyes. His angry comment brought back the most horrible moment in her life, and her body reacted strongly to the recollection. "No!" she cried. "I… that's… that's too cruel."
Noticing her troubled countenance, Kid regretted his rebuke, and softened. "Yes, you're right. It was too cruel of me. I'm still a fool, and as you can see, I haven't changed." Lou opened her mouth to talk, but she felt unable to form a single coherent thought, and all she could do was stammer. As she stuttered the syllable three times in a row, Kid cut her off and added, "I don't know why I thought it would be a good idea to be here these days. I shouldn't have come. Good night." This time without waiting for a reply to his words, he rushed out of the restaurant as if he were coming out of hell itself.
Louise could not hold back any longer, and pressing her fingers against her eyelids, she let the unshed tears run into her hands. She stayed with her face buried in her palms as the silence of her friends engulfed her. "Are you all right?" Buck asked in a serious voice.
Without lifting her face from her hands, Lou shook her head. The three men shared a concerned look, and Jimmy said, "Don't mind him, Lou. He's just a moron."
The comment finally made Lou react, and she lifted her head. "No, he's not!" she exclaimed. "I deserved it!"
"If you allow me, there's something you should do in this situation with our friend Kid. Lock yourself up in a room with him, and that'll sort out all your problems."
"Cody!" Buck scolded, swatting his blonde friend on the arm.
Cody definitely hadn't changed, and Lou forced herself to smile shyly. Her hand lowered to her stomach, and rubbed it against it in circle motions as she still felt a dull ache in the area. "I hate to say that," Jimmy piped up, "but Cody is right to a certain degree."
"Am I?" the former rider exclaimed surprised, and Lou frowned. She knew she had to take Cody's comments with a pinch of salt, but Jimmy's words were a different story, and she was not sure whether to feel insulted or angry.
Jimmy ignored the expression of her face, and started, "When I was eight, a new girl came to the school. I instantly liked her, and I tried what I thought was my best to call her attention. So every chance I got, I acted like a jackass, pulling her piggy tails, messing around in her games with the other girls, and even tripping her up a couple of times. Needless to say, I managed the opposite of what I intended. Gwen didn't understand I liked her, and she ended up hating my guts." He paused, and rising his eyes to Louise, he added, "Lou, Kid ain't gonna understand either."
Louise looked away. "I don't know what that silly story has to do with me."
"Lou…" Jimmy insisted, pointedly raising an eyebrow that showed his skepticism. "You've gone out of your way to put him down at every single opportunity. You ain't like this, Lou, but it's no wonder Kid thinks the worst."
Louise blushed, and then unexpectedly, the dull ache in her stomach tuned into a sharp pain, which had her double in pain. "Lou! What's wrong?" the men's alarmed voices exclaimed, overlapping one another.
Breathlessly, Lou raised her eyes, and weakly said, "Don't worry. It's fine, and…" Yet, her stomach contorted in pain again, and she finally muttered, "Please could you walk me to the doctor?"