A/N: So I didn't post Friday or Saturday. Sorry about that. I tried to make this chapter have more detail. Just for you guys. Thanks for reading!

Chapter 9 ( Sheldon's POV)

I've been getting harassed by Leonard ever since Amy "moved out" and I told him me and Amy didn't sleep together. I did it for Amy, yet I don't think we're fine. I don't think she's fine. My dark room scares me, enough to the fact that a have to have my blanket embrace me. I know I'm not one to think about other people but honestly no one thinks about me. They either want me to sleep with Amy or do something with them. Sure I take charge but still, some people need to take my feelings into consideration. So I don't want to sleep with Amy. So I still want Leonard to live with me. I don't know why but nothing seems to go my way. Everyone seems to yell at me when I say that. No one understands how I feel. The closest was Amy. I don't know what's going on with us. I left yesterday because I thought she wanted me to leave. I'm in my room alone, no one will hear me so I decide to get this pounding feeling off my chest. I know she won't hear me, I know no one will hear me. I just have to say it.

"I love you Amy Farrah Fowler, and I miss you."

I take a deep breath. I had to say it. Its the truth. You can only feel something for so long. Maybe next time I'll tell her this. I doubt it. It's Saturday, no work. Even if I had work, I wouldn't go. Still in the embrace of my blanket, I decide to finally get up. I have to be a little bit productive, I will not let my feeling about a girl ruin me. She's done enough. The way I try to forget all my problems is to drink tea, and that's exactly what I'm doing. Yet for once, it doesn't work. This problem won't be solved with any tea, or a good episode of Doctor Who. This has to be solved face to face. Usually this doesn't end well, but who knows. Sitting on my couch in my extremely empty apartment is not gonna help me with anything, its just gonna make it worse. I have to go, no matter what happens. No bus pants this time, I'm going to walk. This long on and off duel has to end. No matter what. I don't know how she will react, or how I will react. Usually I'm a very prepared person but around Amy I'm totally different. Her quirky personality attracts me, her bright pink lips tempt me. When ever I'm around her, my whole body freezes up. When ever I talk to her these days I always seem to say something wrong, or something good enough that she feels the need to kiss me, which of course I don't mind. It must be a side effect of love. Every day I love her more. I don't know how its even possible. But somehow she makes it happen. Her green eyes sparkle when she laughs. I haven't seen her laugh in a while. Too much has gone on. We used to be like two peas in a pod, always together with nary an argument. But not this year. So much tension between us. It has to end.

Walking to her apartment is long and hard, but finally I make it and knock on her door. Every time she answers the door she always seemed distressed. Always. Is that what I've done to her. She tells me to come in and I do so. I see cue cards on her coffee table.

"Is that your speech?" I ask. Great, bring up the Nobel prize. Very smart.

"Ya, it is." She replies.

"Have you memorized it?" I just can't stop bringing this up.

"No. I don't have an eidetic memory like you." She says.

"If you need help, I'm here." Well that's not going to help. I'm observing her every move. Little twitches, and eye rolls. She looks frustrated. I have to get this over with.

"Amy, can I ask you a question?" That's it I'm getting straight to the point.

"Sure." She rolls her eyes again. I wonder what I'm doing wrong.

"Where are we in this relationship? What is going on? Are you mad at me? Are we together? What's going on?"

"Honestly Sheldon I don't even know anymore. Do you want to be with me?" More questions. Great.

"Yes I want to be with you, why wouldn't I?"

"I don't know. Are you over your jealousy?" She asks more questions, at least we're getting some where.

"I believe I am. Can I ask one more question? Why did you storm out yesterday?" I ask. She shakes a little a looks away.

"You really want the truth?" She asks.

"Yes."

"Well, I stormed out because... I couldn't take it any more not only did you lie about something that's very important to me, you were also being extremely self centered. I know I'm supposed to be expecting that but still." Her words get to me and they hurt. Well at least we're having a conversation.

"What do you mean, your supposed to be expecting it? Have you ever thought about how hard my life is. Every one thinks I'm self centered, they use it against me. But aren't we all. We want what's best for our selves. With me its different. I have pressure coming from every where. Leonard, Penny, you. It's hard. Have you ever thought about that?" I've finally opened up, now I'm waiting for a reaction.

"No Sheldon, I haven't. I guess we're both at fault here." I want to argue with her, and say its not really mine but that would create more problems. So I just nod my head slightly.

"Sheldon. I'm sorry. I have never really taken you feelings into account. Thank you for showing me that. You're right. You can come to my ceremony if you'd like."

"I think I'll come, and I'm sorry too. Could I hear your speech?"

"Of course, the ceremony is in two days I do need to practice." She says. I'm glad every thing is settled now. No more drama, just old us. She smiles at me and her green eye sparkle as she gets ready to start.

"Amy?" I say.

"Yes?" She replies.

"I've missed you." I finally let go, we're back and its something she needed to hear.

"Aww, Sheldon. I've missed you too." A tiny smile forms in the corner of her mouth as she starts her speech. I can't focus though. I think about the things I love about her, just right there. Her hair, her eyes, her smile, her quirky personality, her intelligence. Now I finally notice, she really does deserve that Nobel prize. I watch her speak, her tempting lips. Her speech is now near its end. The words I've got seemed to be good. I've been to distracted. When she finishes she looks at me expecting a review.

"Ummm... It was great!" I say.

"Thanks." She replies. She twirls a little then blushes.

"Amy?"

"Yes?" She replies.

"I love you." These words I need her to hear. Its about how romantic I'll get, she deserves to experience it.

"I love you too." She says, then leans in and places her lips on mine. Instead of fighting off I melt into the kiss and enjoy it. This moment right now, is the best place I could be now. With the woman I love...