Burning Snowflakes

by poeticandvaguelysweet

"He was the kind of guy who left work on time and always made it in just a little late because he wanted to spend extra time with her. He was civil and tired on occasion, he was full of smiles and stories to make everyone laugh – he was a dad. And to Scully that transformation not only happened in front of her eyes but kept her captive from the very beginning."

9. Memento Mori

Thank you all for your alerts and reviews.

Now I wasn't going to leave an AN but I have to. I have edited this about seven times ... but only half of it. This chapter was a bitch to write. And I cannot be bothered editing the last half. I hate it and I want it to go away. It wouldn't bloody end 24 pages! My school work has taken a massive hit because of it as well ... but I don't really care for my school work.
So any mistakes are all mine. ALL mine. Unless someone wants to write this for three weeks and edit over it? :P Let's just say I'm grateful that it's finished.

I don't own it, everything belongs to their respectful owners.
Danica is mine though. So you know. Touch her and I'll come after you with a pitchfork. .. jokes.

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Part 8
Memento Mori

"Then share thy pain, allow that sad relief;

Ah, more than share it! give me all thy grief."
Alexander Pope - "Elosia to Abelard"

…

"I feel time like a heartbeat, the seconds pumping in my breast like a reckoning. The luminous mysteries that once seemed so distant and unreal, threatening clarity in the presence of a truth entertained not in youth, but only in its passage. I feel these words as if their meaning were weight being lifted from me, knowing that you will read them and share my burden, as I have come to trust no other. That you should know my heart, look into it, finding there the memory and experience that belong to you, that are you, is a comfort to me now as I feel the tethers loose and the prospects darken for the continuance of a journey that began not so long ago, and which began again with faith shakened and strengthened by your convictions, if not for which I might never have been so strong now. As I cross to face you and look at you incomplete, hoping that you will forgive me for not making the rest of the journey with you."

[…]

He had been panicking all morning. It wasn't usually like him to panic this much, but considering Scully had called asking for him to meet her at the hospital, he was freaking out. He'd know something was wrong for a while now, but the sound in her voice when she'd called him told him that everything was so much worse than what he'd initially imagined.

To make things that tiny bit worse, Danica's babysitter, Amy. Was away in New Jersey for the next five days trying to repair the broken relationship with her mother and Mulder's own mother had prior arrangements with friends to go away for a few nights. If things were really bad with Scully he was going to be scraping the bottom of the bowl to find a sitter, besides, he didn't trust anyone enough to have Danica for long periods at a time.

So Danni was stuck with him, and stuck with a visit to the hospital. He'd decided first, for the visit to be more pleasant for both Danni and Scully that a stop for flowers would cheer both girls up. He'd let Danica pick the flowers, her selection superb. He wasn't a flowers person and he had no idea what they were, but the reds and whites worked beautifully. Danica was certain that they were to give the flowers to Scully, she chatted happily in the car about the woman she'd only met once.

Danica hung onto his hand as they walked the halls of the hospital, he was looking desperately, almost frantically for the oncology ward and was succeeding in finding no success. A nurse had pointed them in the right direction with a sad smile towards Danica. Most in the oncology ward had bad news and this little girl was about to experience it.

He'd walked past the small x-ray room at first, not recognizing his partner in a hospital gown so soon. He'd hoped never to see her like that again. Stopping in his tacks, Danica barely keeping up with his fast movements. He stopped momentarily in the door way, she hadn't noticed him yet. He let out a heavy breath it felt like he'd been holding it since she called at uttered the word 'Oncology'. His world was standing still.

Perhaps that was his life in one image; Scully in front of him her life falling apart and she was yet to notice him there, almost as though she was ignoring his presence altogether. In his left hand was Danica standing on her own two feet, she clasped their connection tightly in her small hand, and in his right, a bouquet of flowers picked by the life he had saved for the life he was trying so desperately to rescue.

Perhaps this was his life and she was never to turn around and notice him, that she would always have her back to him and never admit that she knew he was there. But, perhaps the key to it all was the thing he held softly in his left hand, the tiny little hand belonging to a tiny little girl whose innocence was so sweet and profound.

In that quiet moment the girl wiggled with excitement, the tingle of electricity running up his arm. She was busting to make a noise, to say something to grab his partner's attention. It was far enough to say after one meeting the girl was smitten with Scully. He took a large step, his hand ready to knock on the door to alert Scully of their being there, but Danica beat him to it, she giggled softly, that noise was the only sound to infiltrate the quite room, other than the bustle of the hospital in the hallway.

Scully turned, a tiny smile on her face for the young girl who'd spoiled their position. She looked at Mulder, her eyes soft and sad, almost as though she was going to tell him of the coming end of the world. At the same time she was desperately asking him why the little girl was there by his side.

Breaking the silence and hoping, the tension. Mulder held up the flowers for her, "I uh, stole these from some guy with a broken leg down the hall. He uh, won't be able to catch me." He paused silently, unaware that it was a perfect chance for Danica to call his bluff. He had to lie about the flowers, he needed her to smile and laugh, he needed for her not to know how much he cared.

"Danni picked dem!" She jumped on the spot excited to have played an important role, she'd practiced those words so hard in the car on the way over there, she was proud to have them come out sounding right, at least to her anyway. Scully gave the girl a smile and crouched down to her level.

"They're beautiful, sweetheart. Thank you." Mulder watched them from his place, now a few steps away from Danica. He could tell that Scully was upset with him and with whatever it was that was wrong with her. It was there he realized she'd wanted to talk to him only a few days ago about something and he wouldn't let her, was this what it was all about?

Danica raised both her hands to Scully's cheeks, her eyes watching the older woman's face, checking over her intensely. "You 'kay?" Danni asked, her voice soft and her words unsure. Scully shook her head, she had told herself she'd be strong, but she wasn't prepared for Danica to be standing in front of her. At the little girls words tears had sprung to her eyes, even though she tried to push them away, they refused to listen. Danica leant in closer, their noses almost touching. "It be okay." Danica told her, like Mulder had so many times. Scully sucked in a breath, the tears threatening to fall. Danica moved her arms to wrap around Scully's neck as she hugged the woman softly, Scully wrapped her arms around the girl in turn and tried to stand with her, her legs starting to ache from crouching. Losing her balance slightly she found Mulder's hand on her, one at the small of her back, the other wrapped around her back completely to grab one side of Danica.

"You okay, Scully?" He asked, finding now the perfect time to interrupt their moment.

She nodded softly, one hand rubbing Danica's back. "I guess that's the question. Actually I feel fine." She paused to take in a breath, not knowing how she was going to tell him. Instead she asked him a question, "Why'd you bring her, Mulder?" He shrugged his shoulders as one hand reached out to stoke over the silent and still Danica and her sweet red hair. The stress was showing now and even Scully could see his minds panic.

"Because her sitters a sixteen-year-old girl who needs notice before babysitting, has school Monday through Friday and is currently in New Jersey trying to mend things with her mother. There was no one else that I trusted that could take her today. I'm sorry." He mumbled reaching out for the girl, but Scully wouldn't surrender. Instead he pulled Danni's back pack off her shoulders and looked around the small room, he tried to think of why she'd call him there. "So what exactly are we looking at?" He asked pointing to an x-ray suspended in front of a light box.

Even with Danica gripping tightly to her. Scully straightened her back her calm in-control exterior showing. "It's what's called a nasopharengeal mass. It's a small growth between the superior conchea and the sinodial sinus."

"A growth?" He didn't like the sound of that, she couldn't be saying what he thought she was saying. Could she? He kicked himself, this was what she wanted to talk about. He swore several times, in his head no being able to even function properly to say it out loud.

"A tumor." She let him suck in a breath, whilst she put Danica back down on the floor, the girl searching through her backpack for her coloring book. Schatz now tucked under her arm. "You're the only one I've called." She looked him in the eye, the melancholy already setting in. To be honest she didn't know why she hadn't called her mother or her brothers. They were as faithful to her as Mulder had ever been, but she owed it to him to know first and perhaps she just couldn't stomach the thought of admitting to her family that her time on this planet was only limited.

With a hand on his hip, he looked at his partner, then back down to Danica, he was helpless and he knew it. "Is it operable?"

She shook her head. "No."

"But it's treatable." He was so sure of himself. Nothing could beat her, nothing was allowed to beat her. She'd get treatment and everything would be better.

It was killing her, having to tell him this, "The truth is that the type and placement of the tumor make it difficult to the extreme." She let him down slowly, watching carefully as he tilted his head and fought the urge to bite his lip.

"I refuse to believe that. I…" She cut him off before he could say anymore. A small smile on her face, she was tempted to roll her eyes but felt this wasn't the time nor the appropriate place.

"For all times I have said that to you I am as certain of this as you have ever been. I have cancer. It is a mass on the wall between my sinus and cerebrum. If it pushes into my brain statistically there is about zero chance of survival."

"I don't accept that. Th, th, th, there" he stuttered, words refused to come, this was what it was like to be powerless, to watch someone as they laid down on the railway lines waiting a most certain demise. "must be some people who have received treatment for this, we ... can …" He was falling apart and letting some of it show. He was right though, there had to be people and there were and that was exactly what she told him.

He watched her in complete awe as she spoke, her strength and confidence was outstanding. She offered him a proposition; Scully wanted this investigated between themselves through the X-Files, not as a personal matter.

She believed that her cancer has something to do with a group of woment she'd met a year ago. They'd all shared a similar story to her own and although she wasn't saying this was due to her abduction, and although he knew she wouldn't admit that. The intention, the thought was still there in the back of her mind. Betsy Higopian was among the women she'd met, Scully had heard that she was currently undergoing treatment for a nasopharengeal tumor after having removed an implant from the base of her neck. Scully wanted to find her and Mulder was willing to help her in any way that he could.

[…]

ALLENTOWN, PA

Together they drove out to Pennsylvania, Danica following along for the ride, unaware of the emotional turmoil that was happening in the front seat of her father's car. She didn't seem to care either, as long as her father listened to her talk and Scully kept tossing her smiles over her shoulder Danica was happy. What they hadn't known, was the resemblance both adults showed towards Danica's own parents. Sure her parents were German and those features were distinct upon their faces, but they love they shared, that spoke volumes in the simplest of actions was exactly was Danica saw with her two traveling companions. Especially when her father reached over and clutched Scully's hand in her sleep, Danica knew he was scared and she herself at three-years-old was terrified. But they loved each other, and they said that within their actions as long as that kept happening she couldn't see a sorry life.

"Mulder, you couldn't have called a nanny when he checked into the hotel before coming over here." Scully moaned at him softly as they pulled up to Betsy Higopians' home. She had her back twisted so she could check on the softly sleeping Danica and observe the neighborhood too.

Through the front window of the other woman's home she could see someone scraping at the window.

"We haven't even spent the night there and you want me to hire out a nanny to look after my child?" He asked appalled that she even had to think he would trust another human being for ten seconds.

Scully sat straight and gave him her signature raised brow, "she's not even biologically yours Mulder. God forbid what you'd be like if she was." She gave him a soft smile as he caught her watching him. "I just don't feel right coming to speak to a woman about alien abductions and mysterious chips with a three-year-old." Mulder shrugged as he switched off the engine.

"She has to live with me and you're fine with that." She shrugged back as he unbuckled his seatbelt with a broad smile and got out of the car. "So that must be saying something." Scully watched him over the hood of the car as he continued to smile at her. "Trust me, Scully. She'll be fine. We'll be in there for an hour tops." She nodded as they both simultaneously reached for the door handle on his side of the car.

"I'll get her, Mulder." Scully told him, ignoring the weird look he gave her as she did so. Only a week ago she'd been reluctant to even speak to him about Danica let alone, offer to help him out. He knew it was no use insisting that he got the tiny girl, she'd only fight with him on it and end up waking the child.

To be honest, he liked this new relationship that was forming between Dana and Danni, he'd wanted it to be there and it was, for that he was grateful. Besides, his partner always managed to get Danica out of the car without waking her, always, he on the other hand had a different story.

With Danica clutching to her side in sleep and Mulder's hand leading them all carefully to the front door by the small of her back Scully noticed a small sign advertising a sale within the house. Finding it odd that a woman would suddenly sell off all of her things she adjusted Danica in her arms with intent to make note of it to Mulder. "I'm sorry, no early birds." A woman came out of the house as she took her first steps onto the porch, interrupting what she was about to tell Mulder, but answering it at the same time.

"We're not here for the garage sale." Scully announced, shifting Danica's sleep weight in her arms again, but she could see how the woman thought they were coming for the sale. "We're looking for Betsy Higopian. No one's returning out messages."

The realtor looked at them surprised and quickly apologized for the assumption, telling them that the little girl had made her jump to conclusions. It made a lot of people jump to conclusions Mulder mused. "Sorry, um, Betsy's passed away, just two and a half weeks ago." Mulder looked at his partner, her face had fallen, but only slightly. She would never let her guard down completely while they were on a case, but he'd known her long enough. His hand brushed over her back slightly, trying to offer her comfort without making it seem he was pitying her. "Are you a relation?"

Mulder shook his head at the realtors question as he pulled his badge out of this jacket pocket. "No, we're with the FBI." The realtor looked sacred as she asked if there was any trouble. "Betsy was part of a MUFON group?" He said, leaving the air open, noticing full well that the woman was scrapping off the Mutual UFO Network sticker. "Would you mind if we come inside and take a look?"

The woman nods and the same time commenting on Scully's brave move to bring her daughter to work with her, she went to correct the woman but Mulder'd tucked his finger in between her palm and Danica's back, pulling them into the house with them.

Scully was overwhelmed with the feeling of being back in that house, the living room the last time she had been there was full of women, all of them sharing the same story as her own. They'd showed her their chips, talked about a woman in the hospital dying because of what had been done to her. In essence they were all dying, Scully understood that now. Snapping out of her daydream she released a hand from Danica so she could stroke her fingers over the light scar on the back of her neck.

"Hey Scully listen to this," Mulder's voice pulled her back to planet earth completely. She blinked quickly then turned her attention on him and the headset he'd held up for her to listen to. Pressing her ear to the device she heard static. "There's two lines coming into this house. This one was lit."

"Someone's sending a fax or computer modem?" Mulder nodded while he reached to take the still sleeping Danica from his small and fatigued partner. He knew where his mind was going before he let her on, and knew she'd appreciate having only to carry her own weight. Shifting the little girl in his arms he had an impulse to kiss Scully's cheek to console the fears he knew she would never speak of, but he fought back the impulse and pressed on.

"Yeah, but who and for what?" He took off through the house, looking for signs of technology, a computer and/or a fax machine as Scully had suggested. Climbing down a set of stairs and finding a tucked away office was exactly what they had needed. "Someone must have remote access to the system." Mulder added as they looked over the computer, there wasn't a single sign of anyone being there but the computer was busy.

"And downloading data."

"Coping files. Let's get a trace on this before whoever it is hangs up." Scully did as she was told and reached for the landline phone.

[…]

"Apartment 234 is listed under Kurt Crawford." Scully announced as they rang the bell. They had waited all day to get out there again, Mulder had taken both Scully and Danica to the park before settling her in with the hotels service sitter just as night was falling.

Scully had been awfully quiet all day, lost in her own mind when they were out. It was killing Mulder to see her like that, but now, now that they were out again looking for a suspect she was fine, the normal Scully he was used to working with. "I'm going to check around back. Why don't you see if you can get the manager." Mulder left her on the front step, prepared to do the leg work on his own for this one, rounding a corner he walked the alleyway beside the building, without a flashlight he was in the dark, left to trust his own eye sight and the light filtered down from the apartments above. Jumping up onto the fire escape Mulder climbed the first flight of stairs. Checking the door that rested on the landing he found it not only closed but locked to the outside. He was going to find a way in eventually, even if it meant that he'd have to break a window. Stepping onto the second flight of stairs the same door he'd checked only a few feet behind him flew open, a man dashing out. Without second thought Mulder was trailing behind him at fast as he could.

They wouldn't have caught up with him in time, if he hadn't have tried to run the way Mulder had just came. The man barely got to turn the corner when Scully stepped out in front of him her gun aimed, finger on the trigger, ready for any move. "Stop! Federal Agent! Hold it! Put your hand where we can see them." She yelled, hoping for once they'd get a culprit who behaved. Slowly pushed him further down the alley way and closer to Mulder. "Are you Kurt Crawford?" Mulder knocked him down to the ground and was quickly on top of him so the man couldn't escape.

"Yes" he answered looking frantically between the two agents. The man's answer had gone to the wind as Mulder looked up at his partner, blood was trickling from her nose and she hadn't noticed yet.

"Scully …" He started his voice concerned.

"What?" She asked and instead of voicing a reply Mulder touched just under his nose. Bringing her fingers up to see what he was talking about Scully dabs the blood there letting the crimson red leak onto her finger. "I'm fine Mulder." She tried to dismiss him but his puppy dog hazel eyes kept looking up at her panicked and worried. "Quit staring at me, I'm fine!"

"You okay in there, Scully?" Mulder had asked. They were back at the hotel, in Mulder and Danica's room, they'd taken a moment to go over everything, to collect themselves, while they left Kurt Crawford to sit in the corner. Danica was with the hotel's babysitter, Mulder requested for them to go on a walk before returning Danica and paying the young woman for the night.

Scully had hidden in the bathroom, she didn't want to face Mulder about her nose bleeds, nor could she look at his worried and helpless face for another two seconds longer. "Yeah, I'm just washing up." She called out to him as she wiped at her nose with a wet cloth. Deciding herself presentable again, only after realizing that she'd have to face Mulder sooner or later, leaving the bathroom Scully stopped dead in her tracks, Crawford no longer had his cuffs on, she looked at Mulder mad at him for letting a suspect out of their cuffs.

"He says he's a member of the same Mutual UFO Network group that Betsy Higopian belonged to, that he was downloading files for safe keeping as Betsy had instructed him to." She cocked and eye brow, that was a plausible excuse, but something didn't make sense.

"Then why'd he run?" She asked, ignoring the fact that the man was in fact in the room.

"He thinks his life is in danger, he thinks there's a government conspiracy to suppress the information gathered in those files." She wanted to roll her eyes, of course he took his cuffs off, he spoke 'Mulder'.

"You think he's credible?" She was watching Crawford, not convinced of his innocent act. Mulder had kept his stance, one hand against the wall of the hallway the other on his hip, stretching the fabric of his dress shirt across his chest and making his suit jacket appear larger behind him than what it really was.

"Well he seems to know an awful lot about Betsy and the other women in the MUFON group you met in her house." Her expression was blank, sorrow was starting to seep through, but to someone who hadn't known her, nothing appeared to be wrong.

"Well, that would have to be cross-checked." She wasn't going to believe anything he said until she had the words in front of her, that was a habit she'd learnt around Mulder, it always sounded so cool and tempting to believe, but at the end of the day it was a recount of some scary story someone had read before bed and woke up believing it'd happened to them.

"We can't." He told her, his face defeated. She was better and hiding her emotions this time around, but he couldn't watch her continuously chasing down leads and believing she had a substantial chance and this, everything was quickly falling to a dead end.

She twirled to face him again, his response unexpected. "Why not?" She asked, before pausing a brow slightly raised. The silence filled the air between both of them, a conversation passing between their eyes. Biting the inside of her cheek she crossed her arms and walked, slowly, yet purposely toward Crawford. "How did they die?" She asked, her voice rough, emotion trying to break free.

"Brain cancer. All within the last year."

"All of them?" She was trying not to convey the shock that'd settled into her mind.

Crawford nodded. "From the group you met there's only Penny Northern, and she's in the hospital and it doesn't look good." She kept her cool, her face schooled, she wasn't going to even flinch, Mulder wasn't allowed to see her react he'd pull her away demand that she stop. But she couldn't stop, not now. They were getting somewhere, albeit slowly.

"What makes you think this is a conspiracy, that the governments involved?"

Crawford gave her a wicked smile. "What makes you think it isn't." He paused, letting his words sink in, making sure she'd double guess herself. "Eleven women are abducted, all with similar recollections of the experience, all developing identical brain tumors, and all refuse state or federal health care because of their insistence of the facts. And all dying within the space of a year." His words were like venom and he was the snake, striking at her, biting, infecting her and once the fangs pierced her skin she flinched.

Mulders hand grabbed her upper arm as he pulled her away from the blank man. He pulled her to the motel door and pushed it open, so they could stand outside yet keep an eye on Crawford. "I want you to listen to me." He demanded, trying to get into her shell, crack it just a little bit.

She looked him in the eye, her own hard steel. "About what?" She'd almost snapped but refrained, she wasn't going to let him pity her, she wasn't going to let him pull her out of an investigation that affected her life so completely.

"About what you won't admit to yourself, what you're denying." He was trying to coax it out of her, making her come to that conclusion and say it out loud.

"What am I denying?" She felt like she was the child and he was the parent, that she wasn't admitting to breaking her mother's vase again and was standing in front of her father pretending to be oblivious to the shattered china at her feet.

"Where your cancer came from." She flinched again, only slightly. She could see Danica coming back with her sitter, they were still a little far off in the distance but they were coming back and this conversation would have to end.

"Mulder it doesn't matter." She wanted him to drop the conversation anyway, he was right after all, but she didn't want to admit it.

"It does matter," He pushed he needed her to see where he was coming from. He didn't want to talk about it as much as she did. "if what you have is a result of your abduction and that abduction is something the government knows about then those are facts that should be brought to light." He was towering over her as they spoke, looking down upon her as though she were a fragile piece of porcelain. Their faces were close, not close enough to be perceived and intimate, but enough for them, their way of dealing. He wanted to be close to her, to hold her to him, to protect her and be that one shoulder to cry on. But he couldn't be.

She sucked in a breath and he knew she was going to be curt with him this time. "I don't know what happened to me." Her words were sharp almost like knives. "I have no clear recollection and I don't think these abductions are even abductions."

"But these women are dead." Danica was getting closer, her steps giddy now that she'd seen them both in the doorway. But Mulder wasn't dropping it, he wasn't being rough with her, his words still hurt, his pain showing through clearly, as well as his need for her to listen.

"No they are not." She shook her head, weakness, emotion cracking through only slightly. "One woman isn't. There's Penny Northern." She had proper confidence when she spoke this time, she had someone to turn to and if that made him drop it, it was fine with her.

"If you won't listen to me then I think you should go talk to her." He could hear Danica now, she could see his face soften at the sound of her calling out his name. Scully could see that he wanted to turn around and embrace the young girl, but he didn't. He wasn't done with her yet.

"About what?" She was angry with him but her voice was soft, but only for a little while. "What it feels like to be dying of cancer? What it's like to know it's like to know that there is absolutely nothing you can do about it?" Her face was hard her looks solid, she was pissed but most importantly she was upset and didn't want him to know. Sometimes he admired her steel attitude, the way she could hide every emotion and every thought from him. But right now he hated it, she needed to be real with him, he wanted to help her but he needed to know how she felt, whether they were emotions people or not.

"If that's too hard for you then I think you should call an investigator." His eyes were soft as she looked back up at him. The slightest of smiles were on his face, a mere tuck at the corner of his lips. "You have one remaining witness Agent Scully. I'd think you'd want to know what her story is." In one swift move he'd spun on his heel and crouched ready to catch Danica as she hurled herself into his arms. Their conversation was over. For now.

She knew it was wrong when she offered to take Danica with her to see Penny Northern, but at the same time she knew the little girl would be easily bored if she went with Mulder to go over Betsy Higopian's things, and she'd be anxious if she was left with yet another sitter so quickly after the last one had dispersed.

The little girl was tired and she had known that too, maybe bringing her along to the hospital wasn't the best idea she'd had. But none the less Danica clung to Scully's hand, walking happily, yet curiously down the halls belonging to the oncology ward of the Allentown Bethlehem Medical Center. Finding the correct room number Scully pushed the door open, leading the little Danica in before her, their hands still clasped.

The room was practically bear, the typical hotel style, white walls, white curtains as well as the usual white bed sheets. Only a few feet from the door lay Penny Northern, the burgundy of her robe attracting the eye in the blandness of the room. She looked like death, her face tired and pale. She was asleep when Scully had sat Danica on one of the chairs against the wall, but as she stood straight and turned to face the sleeping woman she found that she wasn't asleep at all.

A tired smile was pressed to Penny lips. "Dana," She managed to get out, her voice barely above a whisper. "hello." Scully was taken aback.

"I'm .. I'm" She blinked shaking her head softly. "sorry did someone tell you I was coming here to see you?" She took her hand from Danica's shoulder as she took a few steps towards the sick woman.

"No." she said with a smile.

"Then how did you know it was me?" She was compelled, confused and mostly intrigued.

"I recognized you." She told her with a fond and friendly smile. "I told you when we met last year, I held you and comforted you in the place, after the tests." She was patient with Scully her voice soft as she looked over the little girl sitting against the wall a teddy bear clutched to her chest fondly as she watched the adults converse. Scully dropped her head, suddenly finding her feet fascinating. She didn't remember and she didn't want to remember.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to be insensitive, but uh." She hadn't looked at Penny while she spoke a part of her ashamed for not known this woman, someone who had supposedly cared for her in a great time of need. "I don't share those memories." Penny just gave her a soft smile mumbling that it was all okay.

Pulling a chair away from the wall so it was beside Penny's bed Scully sat. She flinched slightly as Danica's little hand found her knee as the little girl pulled herself into the woman's lap, sensing her distress and discomfort. "You have a beautiful little girl." Penny smiled watching over Danica's inquisitive yet shy face. Scully couldn't find the heart to argue instead she just nodded thanking Penny as she agreed. "How old is she? I hadn't known that you had a daughter. Her father must have been most distressed with your abduction." Scully nodded. All care had gone to the wind and she was happy to play into a fantasy she kept locked away when she was nervous.

"He was. But I came back, and that's what matters." Scully smiled softly her hands watching Danica play with her slightly larger and now fully grown fingers in her tiny lap. With both arms on either side of the girl she hugged her tightly before dropping a soft kiss to the top of her head.

"And now you're sick." Penny pointed out already sensing the questions on the agent beside her. "Did you come here to ask about Dr. Scanlon?" Scully shook her head.

"No. Who's Dr. Scanlon?" Her face lifted only slightly, here was a lead she hadn't come looking for.

"He's treating the cancer." Penny smiled another soft gracious smile. "He' treated Betsy too. He thinks he might have isolated the cause, and if he'd caught it earlier he might have been able to do more for her, and for me." Her smile had faded only softly for moment to be replaced with melancholy. She'd accepted her fate, there was nothing else to be done for herself and yet Scully wondered how she still had the ability to smile.

Dropping her head Scully tugged Danica further into her body. She rested her head on top of the little girls', her hair falling to mingle with Danica's softer version of the orange. She pressed another kiss to the little girls head. A million things running through her mind. She had hope for a cure, but hadn't dared think about it. This, this could be her chance, the saving grace she needs.

"His name's Scanlon?" Scully asked; hope sparking behind her eyes only slightly. Maybe she had it at an earlier stage, he could fix it. Make her better. Penny nodded as she answered, that was it. Scully had made up her mind. Shifting the little girl on her lap she excused herself, bidding Penny a quick goodbye but a promise of a return visit. Danica waved over Scully's shoulder as she pulled her out of the room.

Sorting out the necessary requirements to book herself into the hospital didn't take as long as Scully had expected but had taken longer than Danica had liked, by the time Scully pulled her cell phone out of her pocket Danica was asleep in her arms. Calling the familiar number she waited for him to pick up, waited for the phone to answer so she could drop her bomb. He was going to find out sooner or later.

"Mulder." His customary answer with a slightly bored tone. She wouldn't believe him to be sitting in Betsy Higopian's home office shifting through files. Actually she could see it perfectly well, the woman's office could rival his own with alien sightings. Perhaps the X-Files should work out of Pennsylvania

"Mulder, it's me." Scully spoke softly, trying to make it sound as though nothing was going on. Mulder jumped on the spot, happy to hear her voice but worried that something was wrong. He shifted, ready to jump up at her beck and call.

"Where are you Scully?" He asked, checking around the room for his things while he lent on an open filing cabinet drawer.

"I'm at the hospital with Penny Northern. Where are you?" She kept her voice cool and collected.

"I'm at Bestsy Higopian's going through some of those hard files before stuff starts disappearing, and call me an early bird but I think I've found something. Now some of these women who have died, they're childless, and they've been treated for infertility at the clinic about thirty miles from here. Penny Northern and Betsy Higopian are among them." She sighed into the phone as she pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Mulder that's –" She couldn't finish before he kept going, like a kid chasing his puppy.

"I've made some phone calls and I've tried to get some information but nobody is talking to me, so…" He took a second to breathe giving Scully the chance to cut in. She didn't know when he was going to interrupt her again so with a deep breath and a shift of Danica in her arms she let it out.

"Mulder, I need you to come up here." Her voice was weakening, she wanted to crack, to fall to the floor and cry begging mercifully to her lord why was it that she was the one picked to have this happen to her. She wondered briefly if it was because she chose the FBI over medicine or if maybe God was in on the sinister government plot and He was the one to plan it from the beginning. But, maybe he was …

"Why, did you find something there?" He was still high from his lead.

Another deep breath had her finishing her needs. "I need you to bring the overnight back from the trunk of the car and I need you to call my mother and ask her to bring up some things to the hospital." She still couldn't face her mother, but now she needed to know. Mulder the ever faithful partner would call all she had to do was ask.

His face fell, and in that moment he was glad she wasn't saying it to his face he looked like a kicked puppy left on the street to fend for his own. "Is there something I should know?" His worry was evident. Yet there was no mention of Danica. He knew the little girl was fine, but Scully didn't want him to take her from him.

"Mulder, whatever you've found or whatever you might find I think that we both know that right now the truth is in me," He could hear the tears filling in her eyes, sorrow melting in his own. He knew he was going to see her but right now this sounded like a note, her final goodbye, her press for him to continue no matter where she ended up. They really were a sorrow filled sight, if only they were together. "and that's where I need to pursue it, as soon as possible."

"I will be right there." They both forced a smile for the other even though they were miles apart. She slipped down into a chair in Penny's room Danica asleep on her chest. Wrapping the girl in her arms tightly she vowed never to let go. This life was keeping her drawn to her own right now and she needed that balance.

Shoving the drawer he was leaning on closed forcefully Mulder got up and left Crawford without a word of explanation.

Arriving at the hospital, Mulder took Danica from Scully's care leaving the doctors to care for his partner, while they assigned her to a room and hooked her up to various machines he really couldn't bear seeing attached to her, not again.

Pacing the hall way Danica in one arm and his phone in his other hand, he had to call Maggie Scully but had no idea how to broach the subject. Danica whimpered on his shoulder softly, her thumb finding a place in between her teeth. Slipping his phone back into his pocket he shifted so he could look Danica in the eye. The girl fought his moves and whimpered even louder. Prying her from his shoulder he looked the little girl in the eye. "What's wrong pumpkin?" He asked rubbing her back with the hand that was holding her and using his free hand to wipe away at the tears on her cheeks.

"Not good." She muttered her bottom lip quivering.

"Everything's gonna be okay." He told her. "Cheer up little lady." He told her his finger tapping the quivering bottom lip. She shied away from his hand and found her place on his shoulder again. That was the end of her conversation and he knew it. Mulder continued to pace the floor; he made the call to Ms. Scully and checked in on his sleeping partner before deciding that he was better off leaving than staying.

When Scully woke that morning it was due to Dr. Scanlon checking over her charts and her minds sudden need to be awake and present whilst he was in the room. She caught sight of the girl and Mulder sitting in one of the hospital chairs against the wall as he read to her in hushed tones and she sat munching happily with a container of fruit in her hand.

"Dana? I'm Dr. Scanlon. We spoke last night on the phone." When Dr. Scanlon spoke Mulder looked up, seeing she was awake he gave her a soft smile and started to collect his and Danica's things in order to give her and her doctor some privacy.

She was speaking to the doctor when she noticed Mulder was leaving the room Danica in tow. Pulling away from the doctors conversation she called out to Mulder. "Can Danni stay?" She asked him softly. She needed that life again, she didn't know how she'd cope without it. Mulder nodded, he helped Danica climb up onto the bed with a soft reminder to be gentle and to behave. He dropped a kiss to the girls' forehead and a soft quick peck to Scully's hair before telling his partner that he'd be out in the hall.

With Mulder gone Dr. Scanlon jumped right back into their conversation. "Your MRI's and your charts aren't here yet but I have an idea of what to expect. You probably do too from your medical training." She gave a soft nod, she was a little clueless on this topic if she was going to be honest with herself.

"I know that the chemotherapy is going to make me sick." Danica curled herself into Scully's side, her hand wrapping around the woman but only making it to her stomach.

"And the radiation. They're both part of a high does approach to know your system down so we can attempt the gene therapy on P53." He paused, took in a slow breath and offered a small smile to the sky and somewhat terrified girl. He believe her immediately to be his patients child and knew that not only was thing going to be hell on Scully but on the little girl as well.

"You're going to feel like dying." Scully swallowed visibly; squeezing the little girl to her side she didn't have much time to think when the door pushed itself open.

Margaret Scully pushed the door open when she arrived causing Dana's attention to turn from the doctor and her arm to tighten even further around the small girl who had now found a place in her lap. Mulder was standing behind her mother. Even though he'd called the woman he'd looked just as shocked to see her so soon as Scully had.

He caught Danica's attention and called for the girl to join him so that Dana could be alone with her mother and her doctor. He knew for a fact Maggie didn't know about Danni and it was only going to make things awkward. As if sensing the awkward position that would arise Dr. Scanlon slipped out of the room with a mention of blood tests.

Maggie smiled as the gorgeous little girl walked past her, her hair shone a bright soft pumpkin orange in the bright sun light while her eyes like blue glass spun stories in their depths. Maggie was intrigued but didn't speak of it as she turned to her daughter she was still upset that she was only finding out about the cancer now. "I uh, I drove. I was going to take the shuttle but it's only an hour more by car. Can you imagine?" Maggie was nervous her hands twitched, her eyes wouldn't settle, the scared energy was running off her in waves. Danica walked past her but stopped before reaching Mulder. Turning back to Maggie and being bold for a little girl against a stranger she tugged ever so softly on Maggie's grey sweater sleeve. The older woman looked down at her with a soft smile, crouching to Danica's level she acknowledged the little girl.

"Papa," She took a breath trying to remember the right words. For a three-year-old it was hard enough learning to remember how to speak properly let alone remember the English world for the German. Maggie noticed the girls struggle and waited for her patiently. "Papa," Danica brought her hand up to her forehead in frustration. "Papa says, she will be okay." The look on her face when she finished her sentence was priceless. She was so proud of her accomplishments but she looked confused when she saw the tears in Maggie's eyes.

"Mom, I'm fine. I'm going to be fine. I'm just here for treatment." Scully spoke softly not wanting to break the fragile moment. Her mother didn't look up at her when she spoke, but Mulder had given her a small smile before turning back to watch Danica interact with Maggie.

"I hope your Papa's right, pumpkin." She tapped the little girls' cheek with a sad smile, she so hoped he was right.

"Papa!" Danica squealed happily pointing to Mulder in order to make sure that Maggie knew exactly who to have faith in. Shock crossed Maggie's face as to who the girl's father was. Danica looked at him as he extended a hand down for her to grasp, he praised her proudly for her pronunciation. Even though her German accent she'd done as well if not better than what he'd expected from her. Danica smiled at Maggie before turning to blow a kiss to Scully. Deciding that wasn't enough Danica ran for the woman's bed and pulled herself up. She hugged Scully as hard as a three-year-old could before sitting back on the back of her legs. Mulder let out a sigh, Danica was attached and he was never going to get her to leave Scully's side. "I'm going to my Oma's" She told both the Scully women as she looked over her shoulder at Maggie also gaging how close Mulder had gotten to her.

"Okay munchkin, we better get going then." He laughed, if it was up to Danni she'd talk about going to her Oma's all day but never actually leave Scully's hospital bed. Mulder picked her up and swung her into his arms, from there Danica waved both Scully women goodbye and blew them each a kiss, and action Mulder hadn't seen her do outside of today.

"Mulder," Scully called out as she put on a bright smile and returned the kiss to Danica simultaneously ignoring her mother's questioning look. "Don't forget Schatz this time." She teased softly. Mulder promised that he wouldn't as he waved goodbye and let Scully know that he was only a phone call away if she needed him and then he slipped out of the door Danica still waving over his shoulder. Turning her attention back to her mother she sighed softly, falling back into the place of sick little girl, who still felt fine. "Mom, I know what you're gonna say, but I don't have any experience being sick. I promise you, I feel fine, I feel …" She sighed, her words had run out. What really was there for her to say?

"I don't know why you didn't tell me." Her voice was forceful, angry. As a child growing up Melissa had always feared their father when she had misbehaved but Scully was always scared of the angry side of her mother. She may have been short and quiet and ultimately sweet, but she knew how to dish it out. How to make a kid feel really bad for not cleaning their room. Right now, this was one of those moments. But she knew her mother wouldn't be too harsh no matter how made she was. "I don't know why you didn't tell me immediately!" She snapped, throwing her coat onto the chair Danica and Mulder had left sparse and empty.

"I wanted to get all the answers first." She was sure of it no matter how much of a pathetic excuse it was. Her mother just watched her before she looked around the room, asking if Dana had found those things there, in Pennsylvania. "I have found some clarity, and maybe a way to fight back." Her eyes had sparked, that's what she wanted, a way to fight back.

"I don't want to be kept in her dark." Her mother voice was weak. "And I don't want you to have Fox calling me to come out here. You call me yourself; I thought it was worse than what it is." Maggie sat on the edge of her daughter's hospital bed. She took in a deep breath as she looked over her daughters face before engulfing her in a protective hug. "You have always been the strong one, but you are my only daughter now."

"I know mom." Dana herself was on the verge of tears, she could feel her mother tense against her fighting back tears of her own.

"Who is she?" She asked softly pulling back from the hug to meet Dana's confused expression. "The little girl with Fox?" Dana smiled, happy for a different subject, a subject that made her smile.

"His daughter." She told her mother simply an almost proud yet bemused smile on her face as she watched her mother's shock yet again.

"I wasn't aware …"

"Trust me," Scully cut her mother off with a soft snort. "I was as surprised as you are. But she is this great little thing so tender and loving not to mention she brings out the honesty in Mulder."

"You like her." Maggie smiled as she watched her daughter's face light up.

"I feel so drawn to her, mom." She sighed. "She's so addictive. I find that I'm trying so hard to make her smile or learn something new. Just to hear a giggle or a full blown laugh. I want to make sure she's safe all the time and to protect her myself. It's crazy. I haven't even known her all that long." Maggie couldn't help but notice that even in her daughters new found sickly state she was glowing with really, what mothers glowed of.

"She looks like you …" Maggie hinted.

"Mom…" She rolled her eyes.

"What?" Maggie defended. "Stranger things have happened and you kids always like to think that you can keep everything from me." Scully rolled her eyes again. Yes, sometimes both her siblings and even Dana herself had tried to hide important things from their mother before but she had always found them out. Dana couldn't help the laugh that her mother believed she'd hidden a pregnancy and a child from her for four years.

"Mom, you would have known if she was mine. You would have been there, four years ago!" She accented the time frame, maybe she could keep things from her mother if Maggie believed something as silly as that. Hell, then she could keep things from the entire bureau if she was in a relationship with Mulder and had a daughter and not even Skinner suspected. But it wasn't true, yet she believed Skinner probably suspected anyway, Mulder had introduced him to Danni once before. Besides, if they had managed four years at keeping this secret, why let it out now?

Maggie shrugged. "She's very beautiful." Dana nodded agreeing with her mother completely. "You're smitten, but are you sure that's a good idea. I mean, Dana you're sick. Do you want to expose a young child to that suffering?" She fought back the shake of her head that wanted to slip out. She hadn't intended to bring the young girl into this, but she was. She wanted that young life so close to her so she knew there was hope for the future, for Mulder without her.

She didn't want to introduce the young girl to illness and death. She had remembered what Mulder had told her the first night she'd met Danni. This girl had already experienced death, but that didn't mean that she needed to experience it again.

What the hell was she thinking? Why was she letting this young life get so close to her? She was only going to make things worse for this little girl, big psychological trauma for when she got older. No, it had to stop. But could she let it stop? This girl, as she had said to her mother was addictive, how could she let go of something that was making her want to be alive.

[…]

"In med school I learned that cancer arrives in the body unannounced, a dark stranger who takes up residence, turning its new home against itself. This is the evil of cancer, that it starts as an invader, but soon becomes one with the invaded, forcing you to destroy it, but only at the risk of destroying yourself. It is science's daemon possession. My treatment, science's attempt at exorcism. Mulder, I hope that in these terms you might know it and know me, and accept this stranger that so many recognize but cannot ever completely cast out. And if the darkness should have swallowed me as you read this, you must never think there was the possibility of some secret intervention, something you might have done. And although we've traveled far together, this last distance must necessarily be traveled alone."

[…]

Nightmares coursed through her that night; there was no Danica by her bedside, no Mulder offering her a small smile. Her mother had chosen to stay in a hotel for a few nights before heading home but that night, she was alone.

Her dreams were not merely dreams; she was starting to remember what happened to her and that frightened her most of all. Machinery whizzed in front of her face as rapidly approaching her as she herself was rendered motionless. Penny's voice reached out to her in her sleep, soothing her from the nightmare and softly pulling her from it.

She awoke to a bare room, white walls and bed sheets. A hand was holding her on to hers and she squeezed it tightly. Opening her eyes slightly she found Penny by her bedside holding her hand tightly. "Where am I?" She asked quietly her voice laced with sleep.

"You're in your own bed now Dana, you're safe." Penny smoothed as she stroked Scully's hand.

Her head span, her vision wobbled. "I feel nauseous." She announced looking at Penny as though the woman was her last sting. She was glad in that moment that her mother wasn't there, that Danica was with Teena Mulder and that Mulder himself was, well where ever the hell Mulder was. She couldn't have them see her like this, falling apart and ill.

"It's the chemo." Penny told her with a soft sigh and a smile to match. This wasn't a moment where smiles were needed but it made Scully feel a little better. "The chemo's always the worst."

"I had a bad dream. Some … someone was doing something bad to me. You were there. I heard your voice." She knew that if she thought about it, if her mind wasn't so foggy that she could easily place hearing Penny's voice because the woman sat beside her, but even though she didn't want to admit it Dana knew that wasn't true.

"They let me come to you during the procedures. I don't know why, human compassion is not something that they have." Exhaling a sigh Scully squeezed her eyes closed

"I'm sorry Penny. I ca … can't hear this right now."

Although the woman understood she wanted Scully to understand something herself. "You've got to try to make sense of it Dana. It will help you through the pain to understand why this is … this is happening to you." Scully nodded as the woman rose from her chair and let go of Scully's hand. Making sure Penny was gone and not coming back in the night she shifted, lying on her side. With her hands tucked under her head she let the tears fall, there was no one there to clear them and reassure her that everything was fine. In reality she needed the silence, it loomed so heavily behind everyone's awkward words that she just wished they wouldn't speak at all.

She had only wished even through the pain that she had the bright smile of the soft redheaded girl. She didn't want to put Danica thought this and yet she needed that living link. She wanted to scream until she ran out of words. Why was life so harsh upon her? She was a good person, why did she have to let go of that little girl? Why couldn't she let Mulder close? Where the hell was Mulder anyway?

Mulder was in fact back in D.C. his mother had come up to care for Danica in his apartment, this was a stressful time and she knew her son was out of sorts which would eventually cause distress on the little girl. The home she lived in would provide a greater comfort than her home on the vineyard or some other unfamiliar place. His mother had disapproved of the small quarters but Mulder had disregarded her completely, just as she'd suspected. He'd had larger things on his mind, more life pressing situations then that of the size of his apartment.

Right now, now he was looking for the man he believed behind it all. A certain cigarette smoking sonofabitch who seemed to ruin his life at every turn. His plight to see Skinner had ended in vain, the Assistant Director wouldn't arrange the meeting Mulder desperately wanted. Even with the disc of evidence containing Scully's name, a directory file for a fertility clinic, even though he was damn sure his partner had never undergone treatment for infertility.

But Skinner wouldn't budge, no matter the evidence Mulder had his superior wouldn't arrange the meeting, wouldn't let him fall to the cigarette smoking man's ways. Skinner had known his agent was upset, fuming, practically falling apart but that wasn't changing anything Skinner wasn't giving in, he wasn't giving away one of his agents to lies in a desperate plight to save the life of his partner.

"When do we get to meet her, Mulder?" Frohike's voice broke through Mulder's silence. He hummed as he looked up at the man. "Your little girl, Mulder. When do we get to meet her?" Frohike smiled as his friend joined them again on the planet of the living.

"Soon enough, Frohike, but to be honest. I think you'll frighten her." Mulder teased with a soft smile. "When this is all done, when everything's settled and laid to rest with Scully I'll introduce her to you guys." Byers and Langly nodded, both men just as excited as Frohike to meet the little girl Mulder had only just mentioned. "What did you find out about the Lumbard system?" He asked, sensing his friends had more questions about Danica but he had no desire to answer them.

"For all the work it took to get in. What we got on Agent Scully's file … I don't know how much help it's going to be." Langly spoke up swiveling in his chair to face the computer. Scully's file flashing across the screen. Mulder looked between his three friends a silent question in his eyes.

"It's a gene code we've seen before," Byers stepped in. His voice calmer, softer, gentle for Mulder at this point in time. "detected in Scully's blood after her abduction. Normal DNA is inactive in its utical form. When it's unwound or branched like this one that's when it's active, when it can mutate."

"It's probably what made her sick." Langly shared softly, yet in his usual smart ass way.

"Scientists get funky about having their research poached. That's probably why they kept it a secret." Byers had sensed the question on Mulder's lips before he had asked it.

"Someone might be trying to find a cause." Langly offered.

"Or a cure." If there was one to find, Mulder wanted to find it.

"Theoretically."

"You guys ever been to the Lumbard Research Facility?" Mulder paused his eyes lighting with a spark. "Well pick out something black and sexy and prepare to do some funky poaching."

Mulder didn't even have the chance to make it to the Lumard Research Facility before Scully had called.

She didn't want to be alone and he accommodated to that want. He might not have done it in the right way though but he had massive fish to fry. He'd left Danica sleeping in a chair beside her bed, she promised to keep an eye on the little girl, she had wanted Mulder to stay as well. Scared of what might happen to her in her sleep with no one there to comfort the child. But he said something about needing to be someone, she didn't know where he rushed off to, she was curious but not completely concerned.

Mulder had promised to be back in a moment while he ran back down to the car to collect Danica's bag as he'd forgotten to bring it up with him. Pulling herself out of her hospital bed she picked up the sleeping child without a struggle and carried her to the bed. She couldn't sleep if Danica was in that chair. The girl snuggled into Scully's being as close as she could before sighing contently and returning to the world of deep, peaceful sleep. Mulder had told Scully of Danica's nightmares, of having to restrain this tiny being while she kicked and screamed in her sleep unaware that nothing had happened to her while she dreamt, but Scully had shared the night with the girl for the third time now and had never experienced anything but faint sighs from the child.

"I can't be her mother." Scully's voice was a bear whisper as Mulder re-entered the room and put Danica's bag on the chair he would usually occupy. Mulder froze for a second before he looked up at her questions in his hazel eyes. "You can't honestly expect me to do that. To continue like this, living as though I'm the replacement mother,"

"Scully I…" Mulder tried to step in but she cut him off.

"I can't do that to her, I can't do it to myself." She whispered her bottom lip quivering ever so slightly. Danica was asleep in Dana's lap her hands were running through the little girls' hair finding comfort in the action.

"I wasn't treating it like that Scully, I promise." Mulder pleaded as he sat on the edge of the bed and fought to get Scully's eyes in a lock. "She really likes you and right now I thought you needed something like her. To remind you of the sweet things in life while you're currently going through one of the hardest things anyone should have to face." He cleared his throat softly, careful not to wake the dozing girl. "If you ever wanted to be her mother Scully that would be your decision. Not mine. And at the top of the list, it's all up to Danica. She completely adores you." Mulder smiled brightly, well aware his partner was trying not to watch him out the corner of her eye. "It's all up to you and her." Mulder leant in and kissed her forehead in a customary action.

"I can't be." She told him softly as she bit her lip in a way to fight back the emotion that was pressing through her voice. She had made a decision, due to her mother's influence and had wanted to stick by it.

Mulder sighed softly as he squeezed her free hand. "I can take her if you want." She shook her head and chose to stay silent as he left.

Scully wrapped an arm around her securing the little girl to her body. She wanted her close, in all honesty Dana Scully was preparing herself to die and she wanted to make sure this girl was properly loved. That she herself had had someone, something to love before she passed no matter how selfish it was.

"Papi," Danica called out in her sleep but Dana saw no one there, he'd already left. Her own thoughts had drifted to Mulder, to this little girl and the life he was trying to provide for her but it was only a matter of time before someone found out. Before she was taken away. Scully had just hoped if she passed Danica wasn't taken too soon after, she'd hate for Mulder to have two great losses in his life in such a short amount of time.

The little girl was dreaming as she called out for her father again, sometimes Scully wondered which father she was calling for. The man who raised her or the man who was now trying too. Either way her partner hadn't returned.

Letting out a soft sigh Scully relaxed, embracing the young life whose heart beat pounded heavily against her own. Reassurance that there was another day, another time, something else to fight for. With that thought, that reassurance her mind succumbed to sleep.

[…]

He was asked to meet the smoking man down in Agents Mulder and Scully's office before he left that night. Skinner hadn't cared why, he wanted to help Scully as much as Mulder did. He just couldn't let Mulder do it himself.

In the darkened office of the agents in question, the smell of smoke was strong. Mulder's chair swiveled revealing the smoking man, a wicked grin marking his face. "It's funny," He spoke, "I always thought of you as Fox Mulder's patron. You'd think under your eyes that he wouldn't be consigned to a corner of the basement." The man smiled the same way he always did. Sinister and wicked, Skinner imagined that the smoking man smiled the same way Lucifer would have before he fell from heaven.

"At least he doesn't take an elevator up to get to work." Skinner fought back, he may have had no real power towards this older man but he could still fight with his words, still jab and prick and at least try to make the man bleed.

That same smile was still on his face and he took a drag from the cigarette that was always in place in his hand. "You think I'm the devil Mr. Skinner." It wasn't a question, merely a statement. The smoking man, on a good day would also agree to Skinner's statement.

"I'm not her to talk about what I think about you."

"Then why are you here? Is Mulder's partner under illness?" He paused, his face still the smile nicking at the corner of his mouth. "Is it terminal, the cancer?" There was almost a cue for an evil laugh at the end of his statement, Skinner half expected one.

"You tell me."

"Modern medicine today, I hear they can perform miracles." He wasn't letting in, wasn't taking ownership even though Skinner was pointing the finger and asking for confirmation.

"I need a miracle." He couldn't stand there and let one of his agents die, not when he had the chance to save her.

"Well, you think a lot more of me than you let on Mr. Skinner." The smile was back, thicker than ever as he took another drag.

Skinner has to curse himself only slightly in his mind before he gave in. "What would it take?"

"For Agent Scully's life? What would you offer?"

"What'll it take?" His voice was sharp, he didn't want to play this man's game. He wanted an answer.

Getting up to leave the room, the smoking man stopped. "Maybe, Agent Mulder's daughter has something to do with it." He took in another drag and let the smoke fall from his lips. "Danica was it?"

Skinner froze, he'd met the little girl. He'd understood where she came from. "She's a little girl. What could she have to do with this?" He wanted to snap, to lose control. But he couldn't. That would only make things worse. But what was this man implying? Danica was a child who was still learning the alphabet.

"Agent Mulder, has made colleagues of mine very angry because of what he's done."

"What do you mean, what he's done? He rescued his daughter from his horrible ex-wife."

"Well, I'll have to get back to you on that." He headed for the door this time. Intent on leaving. "Oh Mr. Skinner, which way is the elevator?" With one last sinister smile, he was gone.

[…]

Together, with Byers in tow and Langly and Frohike working down in a storm drain, Mulder broke into the Lumbard Research Facility. The halls were empty and eerily quiet, something he knew to expect.

They scanned the hallways as they walked, buying enough time for Langly and Frohike to bite into the system and shut down whatever will get in their way.

"You guys couldn't spring for two of these?" Mulder pulled the head piece from Byers' ear and attached it to his own instead, he didn't like being left out of the loop and being stuck at a security door was putting him on the edge. "Langly what the hell is going on?" He snapped into the phone as he checked over the hallway.

"Mulder." Langly breathed calmly. "This is going to take a moment." Stalking the hall Mulder came across a staff room, peering through the window he found a list of doctors on staff. Scully's Dr. Scanlon among them.

"Boys we have a problem." His voice was rough. "The doctor that's treating Scully's cancer is on staff here." Byers watched his friend as he spoke, this wasn't a good thing, but finding it could certainly save a life.

The security door clicked open and Mulder grabbed Byers' sleeve before he had the chance to walk through. He searched Mulder's face for a silent answer but found nothing but worry. "Look I need someone to get to Scully to tell her to stop treatment. Right now you're the only one who can do that." Byers took in a deep breath and pushed out his chest. He nodded softly agreeing to play Scully's knight in shining armor for this game. He'd get to her and she'd listen he was sure of it.

[…]

Both Dana and Danica had woken up at some point during the night. Scully pulled them both out of bed and wandered the hallway with Danica clasping to her tightly, no matter what she did the little girl wouldn't let go and put up a fight when Scully tried to pry her fingers off from around her neck. Giving in on their walk after ten minutes Scully settled back into her hospital bed, Danica sitting by her side, happy to let go, whilst her hip was against Scully's.

The little girl had found her cross necklace and held it at her fingertips with intrigue. Her eyes avoided Scully's while she whispered a soft prayer in German that Scully hadn't understood. She watched the girl softly as she spoke; taking in her innocent face and wondered how many times she'd said the prayer to remember it.

"Ich bin so müde, ich möchte weinen.
Lieber Jesus Nähe kommen
und meine Hand halten, bis der Schlaf
und Ihre liebe wachen über mir zu halten. Amen."

The cross was still held between her fingers when she finished. She gave Scully a soft smile before letting the pendant free. Her little fingers raised themselves to Scully's cheek and she touched her there ever so softly. Danica's eyes had developed a dark ring around her blue/grey glass color, it made her stare intense. "Not good." She muttered her tiny bottom lip pouting as she ran her fingers over the side of Scully's nose and across her cheek.

"It's okay baby." She told the little girl adjusting slightly so she could sit on Scully's raised legs. Danica shook her head. Repeating her words as tears bubbled in her eyes and her fingers started to shake. Scully held Danica's hand to her cheek, her own tears threatening to make themselves known. "Danni, it's okay. I'll be okay, you just have to be strong little lady. Don't cry." Danica shook her head again repeating her words.

"Get better," Danica whispered as her head found Scully's shoulder and her little fingers found the cross. "Please." Her little voice pleaded before she fell to silence. The sound of her sorrow only being revealed to Scully through Danica's little hiccups.

"I have not written to you in the last twenty-four hours because the treatment has weakened by spirit as well as my body. Mulder, it's difficult to describe to you the fear of facing an enemy which I can neither conquer nor escape. Penny Northern has taken a downturn. I now look at her with a respect that can only come from one who is about to walk the same dark path. Seeing her I can't help but see myself in a mother or a year. I pray that I have her courage to face this journey. Mulder, I feel you close though I know you are now pursuing your own path. For that I am grateful, more than I could ever express. I need to know you're out there if I am ever to see through this."

[…]

"You're hybrids." Mulder spoke as a door was pulled open in front of him revealing several beings identical to Kurt Crawford.

They ushered Mulder inside desperate for no one to find them. Mulder stepped into a laboratory with several large tanks; each containing what looked like human beings. "You've been using me." He hissed.

"Not at all." A hybrid spoke, his statement not convincing Mulder at all. "Your arrival was only coincidental with the execution of our objective."

"What objective?" He didn't know which man to look at, which one to focus his gaze on.

"Subvert the project. The project that created us."

Walking in between two of the large tanks Mulder rubbed the condensation off one in order to peer into it. "I've seen this boy before." He muttered pointing towards the boy in the green liquid, his eyes closed his face relaxed. "These boys were you."

"We're among the end results."

"And you want to destroy them?" For some reason, no matter how wrong it was Mulder couldn't understand why they would want to destroy that of a scientific breakthrough, cloning could help the world, albeit destroy it too.

Leading Mulder into a cylindrical metal vault, lined with rows of metal compartments another hybrid picked up the conversation. "No. What we want is the same thing that you want."

"What are these?" Mulder asked as he walked the line of compartments scanning the names on each of them.

"Human ova." The hybrid paused.

"Taken from whom?" Mulder stopped his eyes catching a compartment with Scully's name on it. Question answered. "What?" He whispered as he pulled the drawer open a row of vials sat neatly in their frozen storage each marked with his partner's name, a date, and a serial number.

"During her abduction, high application radiation procedure which caused superovulation." The hybrid answered Mulder's question before he even had a chance to really ask it. His face flinched as he realized what had happened to his partner whilst she was missing.

"Why?" Mulder asked, visibly swallowing. They couldn't have done this to his partner purely to make hybrids. Not to his Scully.

"For fertilization. They constitute one half of the necessary raw materials."

"For genetic hybridization, or reproduction? These women, these women are your birth mothers."

"Barren now, from the same procedure that caused their cancer." Scully was going to kill him when he told her this. She'd never voiced to him any opinion about having children, but he knew it would kill her to know that she no longer could. It killed him just knowing that she'd never be able to have a child of her own. That was harsh on anyone. "And now they're left to die, their conditions hastened by the men running this project."

"You're trying to save them." Mulder was puzzled, that was a first in this governmental twist.

"They're out mothers." Mulder stuck his hand into Scully's drawer and grabbed a vial. He couldn't leave and not.

"My daughter." Mulder called out to the hybrid causing the man to stop in the doorway. "Well, she's not. But I took her from a site in Russia. Is she, is she one of you? A hybrid?" The Crawford looked at him, thinking for a moment before shrugging his shoulders.

"The men who run this project have ties in Russia but, I do not think they would be producing children out there. They have no use for children, Agent Mulder." Mulder let out a breath he wasn't aware he'd been holding.

"So she's fine. She's normal." The hybrid shrugged his shoulders again.

"I don't know anything about the matter, I really can't comment." He nodded understanding completely. Mulder left the Crawford laboratory in hast after that. He had more evidence then what he'd suspected he'd get going in there.

[…]

Running down the hallway of the oncology ward, Mulder practically tripped as he reached Scully's bare room. Her bed was empty, Danica's backpack scattered on the floor next to an open coloring book and pack of crayons. Schatz sat on the unmade bed in between ruffled sheets. His partner wasn't in the room, nor was his kid. A small journal lie open on the bedside table all he had to read was "Mulder I feel you close" before the feeling of nausea rose in his throat.

Panic then stirred in his stomach, bubbling to the point where his vision was blurred with nausea. He pushed the feeling aside, he had to find Scully and Danica.

He grabbed Schatz before running out of the room. He ran for a nurse at the end of the corridor. "Nurse, nurse! Dana Scully is supposed to be in her room, where is she?" The nurse looked at him blankly.

"She's not there?" She asked confused as to where the woman could have gotten off to. It had only been an hour ago that the nurse herself had returned the little girl to the room after taking her down to the children's ward for the activities that were being put on down there. She returned the little girl with face paint and an uplifted spirit, even if she had struggled when the nurses offered to take her from the room.

"No what happened to her?" The nurses face was still blank.

"I don't know." She shrugged her shoulders as a fire ignited in the man's eyes. Perhaps that wasn't the best answer.

"Well who the hell does know? She had a little girl with her, how hard is it for them to disappear?!" He wanted to lash out to take it out on the nurse but Mulder thought better of it. Leaving the nurse in his wake Mulder dashed back down the hall.

"Mulder." Byers caught his attention in the middle of the hall Danica crying on his hip as she fought the strange man's hold. The face paint still on her face, the little mouse whiskers starting to run with her tears. She pushed all her weight against Byers' strong grasp as she screamed for Mulder.

"What happened to Scully?" He asked getting closer to the man and the screaming child. Holding his arms out he took Danica from Byers where the girl whimpered in his arms before taking her bear from his free hand and quieting. Danica's state wasn't convincing him that Scully was fine.

"I got her." Byers confirmed leading the man a little further down the hall. Expecting Mulder's question of proof. Byers pushed open the door to Penny Northern's room, revealing Scully seated by her side large, tiresome bags under her eyes. Scully looked at him for a moment, long enough to catch the answers before turning back to Penny.

Hours had passed, more than he could count on one hand and yet he was still sitting on a bench in the middle of the hall, Danica on his lap and Schatz on hers. The little girl was content and happy to chat to her bear in the funny little way she spoke to all her toys. She was tired and he could tell by the way she didn't even bother with sitting upright properly. Instead she slouched against his chest her words slightly paused every now and then.

When Scully reappeared in the hall her face had fallen, all look of a fight gone. "Is she gone?" Mulder asked softly as he stood and moved Danica to sit on the seat alone. Scully nodded softly, her shoulders slack.

He took a step towards her, itching to wrap her in his arms. "I'm sorry. I know what she meant to you." He paused trying to find the right words. "When I came to find you, you weren't in your room. I got scared that something had happened … and I read some of what you wrote." Scully sighed heavily as she took a step closer to her partner.

"I didn't want you to read that. I had decided to throw it out. I decided tonight that um … that I'm not going to let this thing beat me. I came into this hospital able to work, and that's how I'm leaving." Mulder nodded, a soft smile on his lips. He really couldn't expect anything less from his partner, and to be honest with himself he'd gotten scared when he'd noticed that she was playing submissive to this disease, letting the cancer completely dominate her life.

"Byers tell you about Dr. Scanlon?" Mulder asked as he tried to rid the look of pity off his face.

Scully nodded. "Yes."

"He may very well have killed those women." Mulder added, he needed her to have reassurance on so little information.

But, as usual his Scully fought back with him. "That will have to be proven, if we find him." Mulder smiled softly.

"When we find him." He corrected. "Scully, something was done to you, something that you're just beginning to remember. You can't quite figure it out but it can be explained and it will be explained. And no matter what you think as a scientist or a doctor, there is a way, and you will find it, to save yourself." His finger was under her chin, not allowing her to look away.

"Mulder, I can't kid myself. People live with cancer. They carry on, and so will I. You know I've got things to finish, to prove to myself, to my family, but for my own reasons as well." He smiled at her brightly her own face copying the action as he finally wrapped his arms around her tightly.

"Come on back." He paused for emphasis with a soft smile. "The truth will save you Scully. I think it'll save both of us." He leant in slowly and kissed her on the forehead for what seemed like minutes. He wanted so badly to kiss her lips, to take that small step closer. But he couldn't, she was ill and that would be taking advantage of her. Not to mention the both of them would lose their jobs. He let her go, their hands the last things to part as she walked back down the hall towards her own room.

Mulder watched her go, as Danica grabbed his left hand, sensing their time to leave, whilst his right hand held the vial of her ova in his pocket, his mind spinning as to what to do. He couldn't tell her, not while she was sick. That would be unfair game, he'd wait. Until she could handle the news herself. Right now, she needed to get better; he needed to find her a cure. Until then she had Danica and himself backing her up all the way. Ready to catch her if she fell.

---

Dare I ask for a reviews ...? Or do I run away and be a good little school girl and put my studies before my writing? Please don't make me put my studies before my writing.

Next chapter might take a while but I really hope I can get it up by my usual Friday mark. I have seemed to have fallen behind greatly in school and in order to not hear the "What about your dreams?" speech again, I must really catch up. So that'll kee me behind schedule or it'll be the fact that my idea's are all living in the shit house and don't want to play fair. Nothing out of the ordinary though.

-Lyssa.