Prompt: Bodies (#506)
"I can't give it up
To someone else's touch
Because I care too much."
(The xx, Infinity)
Tracey didn't know what she was doing. As she lay, staring up at the ceiling breathing harshly with tears built in her eyes... she wondered if this was what drowning felt like.
Turning to her right, she stared at the body beside her and grimaced.
That's all they ever were to her. Bodies. Nothing more than that. No soul, not heart, no passion. Just empty shells that she thought could help her forget.
But no one ever made her feel the way Theodore had. Nothing even close to that wonderful, heavenly sensation that could both make her elated, or crush her; depending on the whims of the day.
Getting up and getting dressed to once more slither into the night, she knew that she'd been a fool. She'd become afraid of what she felt for the tall, slender boy who'd always been her best friend and who turned out to be more. And the moment she realized that things had gotten too serious, that she felt much more than was safe or wise... she'd run.
She'd broken Theodore's heart. And she'd thought she could live with it and not regret...
But then... three years had passed and she still felt nothing but... emptiness. No one stirred even a single flutter in her heart.
Perhaps... it was simply that her heart was absent. Perhaps she'd left it behind with Theodore, and never gotten it back.
Was it too late?
Would the boy that promised her forever... be waiting for her? Would he even be able to forgive her?
As she stepped into the dark, it began to rain and Tracey stood for a moment in the deluge, wondering if she had the audacity to turn up at his doorstep at two in the morning. If she had the courage to face the boy, she'd thought she'd left behind. The one she desperately wanted to forget.
It was the knowledge that she couldn't go on like this anymore, that prompted her. The fact that, she couldn't live en eternity like this... longing for something she'd never be able to find in anyone that was not Theodore.
She just hoped, somewhere between the pit of her stomach and the center of her chest... that Theodore's heart proved more true and forgiving than her own.
~END~