Chapter Thirty
Bella
When we got back Charlie was pleased to see me but for once he really noticed. "What's up Bells? Didn't you have a good time?" I forced a smile, "Sure Dad I'm just tired". He nodded, "Yeah well late nights will do that to you. Better get some rest or you'll be shattered for school". I was happy to escape to the sanctuary of my room, throwing my clothes in the hamper and grabbing a quick shower before sinking into bed. I watched the moon moving in the sky but I couldn't sleep. I kept seeing Jasper's eyes, the haunted look, and I knew I had to find him. I couldn't wait until the end of year but I didn't know how to get away without compromising the Cullens.
Each day I spent my lunchtimes with Rose and Emmett, always looking for that terrible news they thought was coming. I was struggling to concentrate in classes and my grades began to slip a little but with Rose's help I managed to keep up. She remembered all her work over the years and tutored me enough to graduate. I wanted to leave every day. Every night I spent thinking about him. It was as if he'd crawled under my skin and taken residence in my very soul. This was unlike any other craving. I felt if I didn't see him soon I would lose my mind and I didn't understand why. I'd liked him, a lot but how had he become the center of my world?
I asked Rose in the end because I was going mad. She put her arm around me and took me into a quiet corner of the school library. "Bella I shouldn't be telling you this. It's not something we talk about even among ourselves really, but you have a right to know. I don't know how it works with humans. Its been a long time since I became what I am. In our world there is one person, its like you are half of a person until you meet your mate, the other half. When I first saw Emmett it was as if I felt complete. I was at peace, my world was whole at last. I think you are feeling that need, that pull to your missing half. That's why it's an unwritten law that you never hurt a persons mate. Because it hurts them too. Jasper twice thought he'd found that person and both times he was wrong.
"Both Alice and Maria used Jasper, they were fond of him at one time, Alice may even have felt she'd found her mate although I doubt it. I think she always knew he wasn't the one but he would do until that one came along. She led Jasper to believe she was his mate. Then she saw you coming and she knew he'd get away from her so she made it as difficult as she could. Alice can be very manipulative and she made him feel guilty about you, as if he were betraying her. When he saw you he knew there was something special although he fought against it as long as he could. Just hang on Bella"
Emmett came to find us then, "I've been in touch with Peter who has someone down south watching out for him and Jazz hasn't appeared there yet. Peter's out looking but he's found nothing, he thinks Jazz is holed up somewhere trying to decided what to do. We graduate in a weeks time then we'll go look. I promise you. Carlisle's going to contact your Dad and suggest you come with us on an extended camping trip. He'll put a good spin on it and I'm sure Charlie wont be difficult. Then we go". I hated this but I couldn't see a way round it. I'd waited this long, I just hoped Jasper waited another week or so before making a decision.
In bed at night I prayed and I thought about him, trying to send him reassurance. Hoping he might feel my love across the miles. I knew he was still with us because the pain in my chest although nagging hadn't changed and I was certain it would if he were to decide to go to Mexico. I tried to look enthusiastic for my graduation although I flatly refused to go to the Graduation Ball even with Rose and Emmett. Alice had reappeared after a prolonged absence looking cheerful so she obviously knew about Jasper. She kept giving me appraising looks, almost as if she wanted to speak to me but wasn't sure quite how to. Rose watched her watching me, with concern. At the end of class one day just before the end of the summer term she held me back.
"Bella I need to talk to you". I glared, "I don't think we have anything to say to each other" and I shrugged her arm off mine. "I'm trying to help" she snapped crossly. I looked at her skeptically, "Really Alice? Now why do I find that so hard to believe?" She sighed heavily, "OK I've been a bit of a monster... "I started to laugh "No Alice you've been a prize bitch but don't apologize you're talking to the wrong person". I thought she would go then, she looked so affronted, but she pursed her lips before continuing. "I guess I asked for that, but I really do want to help. I can tell you where to find Jazz". She smiled and I itched to slap the look off her face. "Why Alice?" I find it a bit difficult to see you helping me."
I could see her patience running low but I wasn't going to make things easy for her, and I didn't trust her one bit. "Well" she said huffily, "Believe me or don't. Your choice, but he'll be deciding at the weekend and on Monday or Tuesday next week he'll head for Mexico. He's just not strong enough without someone to back him up. If you want to find him try the caverns at the edge of the Whitlock property. Or stay here and leave him to his fate. Your choice". I watched her closely, "Why are you telling me this?" I asked her. She shrugged again, "I don't want him any more. I've found someone new. My true mate. That's why I've been gone so long. As you seem interested I thought I'd help. He's not that bad after all, and it would be a waste to let him just walk into an execution, because that's what will happen if he reaches Maria. She will want to trust him but she's too manipulative herself to be able to. So he'll die. I've told you, the rest is down to you. Do you feel enough for him to tie yourself to a vampire, especially one as unpredictable as Jasper Whitlock. Believe me, it's not easy to keep him under control. I should know, I did it for long enough. We'll see you at graduation" and she skipped out, a beaming smile on her Oh so innocent face.