Chapter Thirty Four
Bella
The sun was warming the Earth and there was mist all around us. I sat with my back to a rock warmed by the sun and pulled him down to sit beside me then I studied him. Gone was the neatly dressed confident man I remembered. In his place sat a rumpled, tired looking, lost soul and my heart bled for him. "Oh Jasper I'm so sorry. Look what I've done to you". I touched the grimy cheek closest to me and he leaned in until my hand was flat against his face.
"My poor Jasper". With my other hand I turned his face to mine. The eyes were so black they looked like the gates of hell and I was sure they reflected what he had seen over the last few days. I brushed away the tangled hair from his forehead and put my lips to it. "It's going to be OK Jasper. I'm not leaving you. I'll be here as long as you need me". His lips parted and the slightest whisper of sound emerged, "Don't promise that. You wont stay for ever, so please don't promise that". A single tear rolled down my cheek at his words. "I promise I'll never leave you, unless you ask me to". and I placed a kiss on his lips. It was like kissing an energy source, I felt a shock run through my body leaving it tingling excitedly.
Jasper
I saw her at last in the bright sunlight and I knew she was really here, and what's more she had told me she loves me and she would never leave me. As her lips brushed mine I felt the connection, the completeness and I knew she was the one. She was my soul mate. The feeling I got from her touch was unlike any I had ever felt before. When I took Alice's hand I felt hope but with Bella's touch I felt complete, as if my journey were finally over, I'd come home. "Bella, you came" I whispered. She looked at me and smiled, "Of course, I'll always be here, how could I leave you? It would be like leaving my heart if I left you". She kissed me again then pulled back to look at me.
"Jasper you need to hunt, shower and relax in that order. I'll wait right here, you go find something in the woods, feed and then come back to me". She saw my hesitation and took off her shoes throwing them into a narrow crack in the rocks, "See I'll be here when you get back. Where am I going without shoes?" She smiled and pushed me gently. I backed away unwilling to let her out of my sight, then took off running for the trees and blood. I was so thirsty I grabbed a few squirrels to take the edge off so I could think, to hunt properly. I found two deer drinking in a pool and broke both their necks before gorging on their warm blood. It wasn't enough but I couldn't stay away any longer.
I ran back even faster, and there she was sitting on the rock where I'd left her. When she saw me her smile was like a beacon. She held out her hand and I leaped across the rocks to take it. I turned her hand over and kissed the pulse beating just below the skin. She never flinched, didn't try to pull away and I knew she trusted me.
Bella
The smile on his face when he saw me waiting for him made it all worthwhile and I held my hand out to him, welcoming him back to me. As he kissed the point above my pulsing blood I smiled, it was a test to see if I trusted him. What he didn't know was that I would have offered him my wrist in the dark in that cave, that was how much I trusted him. "Jasper would you like to walk back to the house slowly Only when you are ready, but I think you'd feel better for a shower". He tensed and shook his head, "No not back" he managed through clenched teeth. "OK. Where would you like to go? He cocked his head to one side thinking. He looked so tired, something that upset me more than anything. He was emotionally exhausted. I pulled him down beside me. "Rest a while Jazz" I placed my arm around him and pulled his head back onto my shoulder. I knew he couldn't sleep but he sighed and I felt him relax even more. We sat in companionable silence for a long time as he unwound.
I felt his muscles tense then and he jumped up. Then he managed a small smile and turned his back to me, "Hop on Bella, I'll take you for a ride". I climbed on his back and he set off running, not fast just an easy lope, like a wolf or tiger. I closed my eyes, just enjoying the sensation of being so close to him. My legs wrapped around his thighs, my arms around his neck and my face buried in his hair. I was saturated with his scent and it made me feel heady. How could anyone smell this good? It just wasn't fair. Then I heard him groan, "Are you OK Jazz? I can walk". He shook his head, "No, I'm just enjoying your scent, its overwhelming". I laughed "What?" he asked puzzled. "I was just thinking the same thing" I explained.
When he finally stopped I opened my eyes and gasped. We were in a small clearing and at the centre was a clear pool. "Its beautiful" I exclaimed as he let me down gently. "You like it? I used to come here a lot. Its quiet and tranquil. Something I never got a lot of, until now." he added looking at me. "I'm going to take a dip to clean up. You can join me or if you like, you can sit on the tree trunk over there. It's quite comfortable". I nodded and walked over to sit down. The clearing suddenly felt full of static. He stood on the opposite side and without even thinking, stripped off and dived in. I'd never seen anything so beautiful or erotic and my body ached for him but it was too soon, he was still too fragile for me to take advantage of.
I watched as he swam under the clear water with slow strokes then stood up. He ran his fingers through his tangled hair and shook like a dog. The water droplets flew through the air splashing me and I giggled. He looked over a little self-consciously, "Sorry". I shook my head and bit my lip. "Don't worry cowboy, I'll get my own back one day". He closed his eyes then shrugged "Sorry Bella I didn't think. I hope I haven't embarrassed you, or frightened you". I slipped down the trunk and stood at the edge of the water holding out my hand, "Come on Jazz. Let me help you get dry". He looked at me with a half-smile "You sure?" I arched an eyebrow "You coming out or not?" He stepped out, water droplets falling down across his chest to his flat stomach and down.
I kept my eyes above waist level this time, too much input was driving me crazy. As I dried him off I noticed the scars. There were so many of them that they overlapped, so many bite marks glistening in the sun. I used his shirt to dry his hair while he pulled on his jeans. "Better?" I asked. He turned very serious. "I'm sorry about that Bella. I never thought", I held up a hand, "Hey, it's not every day a girl gets a private floor show like that. It will give me something to dream about". He took my hand, "'I'm hoping that in the future it will give you more than good dreams". I swallowed nervously. "I'll bear that in mind. You ready to go back now only I'm starving and I could really do with a hot shower". He looked at my blue fingers and I saw his fist clench. "I'm so sorry Bella. I should have considered you first". I put a finger over his kissable lips. "You needed time first. Now how about a ride back to the ranch". He smiled, kissed my cheek, and turned around. As he started to run the feel of his bare back against my cheek drove me almost mad. I wanted him to stop, throw me on the ground and crawl all over me. I felt hot and sweaty and my stomach was full of butterflies. I couldn't even think straight.
Jasper
I could still hardly believe she was here, that shed come back for me. She'd sat in that dark cave hearing my snarls and it hadn't frightened her sway. What was it about her that was so special? How was she not scared when even other vampires would have baulked. When we got to the pool I felt wonderful. She was so close, her body wrapped around mine, her smell drenching me. When she sat on the log I never thought. I felt so comfortable with her that I stripped off and dived in before realizing what I had done. I swam under water not wanting to see the look of horror that must be on her beautiful face now. Horror that I had stripped naked in front of her and that the sunlight meant she would have seen all my scars. Every mark of my savage past would stand out in the sunlight.
I knew I'd lost her but I couldn't stay under water for ever so steeling myself for the rejection I knew awaited me I stood up, shaking the water out of my hair. Her giggle was so out of place that I looked over ashamed to see her smiling. There was no look of revulsion, only affection, even love as she called me over. I tried to apologise but she laughed and taking my shirt used it to dry my hair. Had I really been so lucky? Had I found someone who didn't look at my scars with revulsion? When I saw how\ cold she was I felt a fool. Id forgotten all about her human needs in my own misery and she'd suffered in silence until I was well enough to take care of her. I would get her back and try to treat her with as much care as she had shown me.