Author's Note: Thank you to everyone for the great feedback so far. I'm like Rachel and Tinkerbell, but instead of needing applause to live, I need reviews. :) So review and let me know what you guys think.
The next day Jesse was standing around talking to some of his cast mates waiting for rehearsals to begin, when he saw Rachel walk in. He immediately brightened and one of his cast mates, Thomas, turned to look to see what had made Jesse so damn happy.
"You play with fire St. James, you're gonna get burned," Thomas said quietly so only Jesse could hear him as he leaned over towards Jesse.
"It's not like that man," Jesse lied. "She's just an old friend." At least that was somewhat true. Although his actions last night within the comfort of his own shower said otherwise.
"Uh huh, don't think I haven't seen the way you look at her. It's written all over your face," Thomas said as he glanced over at Rachel who just so happened to look their way at that moment. She looked away quickly. "It's written all over her face."
Jesse turned his head to see what his friend was talking about only to see Rachel talking with a small group of people. "We're just friends," Jesse said, trying to convince himself more than Thomas.
"Keep telling yourself that and eventually you might actually believe it," Thomas replied, grabbing his friend on the shoulder and squeezing it a bit.
Rachel could feel eyes on her so she turned her head to see Jesse looking at her as he talked to Thomas. This time, she didn't turn away like she had when Thomas had caught her looking at Jesse. She smiled at Jesse and gave him a small wave.
He returned her smile just before he said something to Thomas and started walking over to her. As he walked towards her, she blushed wildly as she remembered what she had done the night before and how she had fantasized about him. She hoped that he wouldn't notice how she could not stop blushing.
"Hi," she said, hoping that she didn't sound as nervous as she felt. She stepped away from the little group she had been chatting with so she could talk to him.
"Hi," he returned. "So I was thinking that maybe tonight you'd want to see one of my favorite places in New York." When Rachel hesitated he added, "I mean, that is if you don't have somewhere else to be later."
She thought the unsure expression on his face was absolutely adorable. So unlike the Jesse St. James that she had known. "Actually, my schedule is completely open tonight," she told him brightly. Donovan had told her before she'd left that morning that he was going out with some friends later that night and would be home late.
"Good. After rehearsals then," Jesse responded. Rachel nodded in agreement just as the director yelled for everyone to take their places as they were going to do a run-through of the opening number. Rachel smiled at Jesse before heading to her place on-stage. She could hardly wait to see where she and Jesse were going tonight.
Five hours later, after both Jesse and Rachel had showered and cleaned up, they met just outside the stage door. "So where are we going?" Rachel inquired as they walked side-by-side.
"Now where's the fun in that?" Jesse teased.
"Can I guess?" Rachel asked.
"You can try," he responded smugly.
"Can I eat there?" she asked. "Because I'm starving right now."
"In theory, one could eat there but it's not a restaurant," he answered vaguely.
"Can I get a drink there? Because I'd also like one of those."
"You could get one of those as well, but it's not a bar." He actually liked this little game of twenty questions they seemed to be playing.
Rachel huffed a bit in frustration. "Does it have trees?" she asked as Jesse attempted to hail a cab.
"No, it's not Central Park or anything in Central Park. Or a park at all, for that matter."
"Does it have a great view?" Rachel wondered if it could be something outside of Manhattan. Perhaps in Brooklyn.
"I like to think it does, but it's not a view of the city," he replied cryptically.
"Has anyone ever told you that you're infuriating?" Rachel pouted.
"Has anyone ever told you that you should learn patience?" Jesse smirked. Rachel took slight offense to that. "Also, you're kind of terrible at twenty questions. You didn't even make it to ten questions."
Just then a cab pulled over towards the sidewalk and stopped for them. Jesse held the cab door open for Rachel and let her get in. Rachel expected him to tell the cab driver the address but he simply handed him a slip of paper which frustrated Rachel to no end.
Now she couldn't even narrow it down by the address that he told the driver. Rachel huffed and sat back against the seat.
Jesse chuckled. "Oh my God, I feel like you're about to explode." The only he response he got was a death glare. "Do you really want to know that badly?"
Rachel sighed. "I guess not," she replied, smiling sheepishly.
Jesse loved how melodramatic she could still be at times. Once a drama queen, always a drama queen. He leaned over towards her and patted her leg, "I promise that you'll love it, if that helps."
"It does," she conceded, trying to ignore how her skin was tingling where he'd just touched her leg.
Jesse had been right about her loving where they were going when the cab stopped outside of Carnegie Hall. She noticed that according to the marquee, there wasn't an event going on for the next few days. "Jesse, there's nothing going on here," she turned and looked at him, a bit puzzled.
He looked up from the text he was currently typing out on his phone and grinned at her. He soon got a response and put his phone away. "Come on," he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her with him to the side of the building.
As they approached a door, it suddenly opened and an older man appeared. "Hey Jesse," the man said, as Jesse let go of Rachel's hand as they approached the door.
"Hey. Thanks for doing this for us," Jesse replied, as he shook the man's outstretched hand. "Peter, Rachel. Rachel, Peter," Jesse said introducing them.
"Nice to meet you, Peter," Rachel said, shaking the older man's hand.
"Peter pretty much runs this place," Jesse explained to Rachel as they walked inside.
"Jesse called me up this morning and asked me if I could do this for him. I was more than happy to help out," Peter explained, smiling at Rachel warmly. "Listen, it's all set up, you can just go on in," he said, turning to Jesse.
"Thanks, man. I owe you one," Jesse said, grinning from ear-to-ear.
"It was nice to meet you Rachel," Peter said, then he headed off in the other direction and was gone.
"What's set up?" Rachel asked, her interest piqued by Peter's cryptic words.
"You'll see," he said, grinning at her and grabbing her hand. He lead her through the darkened corridors, obviously knowing where he was going and then she saw bright lights shining up ahead. They walked through a large backstage area to emerge on the stage of the main auditorium at Carnegie Hall.
Rachel stopped walking and her hand slipped from Jesse's as she looked around the hall in amazement. All of the lights in the auditorium were off with the exception of the stage lights. "Oh my God," she breathed, almost reverently. "This is…" she started. She looked over at him to find him sitting at the grand piano at the center of the stage.
"Amazing," he finished for her. She nodded her head in agreement with his assessment. "Come sit with me," he said, motioning to the piano bench that he was currently sitting on.
Rachel sat down next to him and tinkered with the keys of the piano before looking at him.
"I was thinking it's been too long since we've sung together just for the hell of it," he explained.
Sure they had sung their duets in the show rehearsals, but Rachel understood perfectly what Jesse meant. "Over ten years," Rachel remarked. "What song did you have in mind?"
"Joni Mitchell's "Both Sides Now"," he replied.
"Ah, I love that song," Rachel sighed.
He began playing the opening chords of the song and nodded to her indicating for her to start the song. Bows and flows of angel hair/And ice cream castles in the air – she began the first verse. She looked at Jesse and smiled as he joined in – But now they only block the sun/They rain and snow on everyone – harmonizing with her in the second part of the first verse.
Their voices sounded perfect together. Someone listening to them would have thought that they had rehearsed this duet by the way they executed it flawlessly. Their voices meshing perfectly on the chorus.
Rachel watched Jesse's hands move across the keys as he played the chords of the song and began to sing the next verse – Moons and Junes and Ferris Wheels/The dizzy dancing way you feel. She loved watching him play. It was beautiful. As he continued to sing – As every fairy tale becomes real/I've looked at love that way – she closed her eyes and just listened to him play and sing.
Opening her eyes, Rachel turned her head and looked at Jesse – But now it's just another show/You leave them laughing when you go – as she joined him in singing the second verse. Rachel looked away from Jesse and out towards the auditorium as she sang the next lines – And if you care don't let them know/Don't give yourself away.
She imagined them singing this and other songs for a packed house as they sang the chorus once again. Not them as characters in a musical but Jesse and Rachel performing a concert for thousands of people.
As they began the last verse together – Tears and fears and feeling proud/To say 'I love you' right out loud – she smiled ruefully at him. The truth in the words of the song resonating through her.
It was like they were spellbound as they sang the final chorus together – I've looked at life from both sides now/Win and lose and still somehow/It's life's illusions, I recall/I really don't know life at all – belting out the first part of it only to finish the song with a soft, hushed tone.
They sat there for a moment afterwards, neither one of them saying a word, still looking in each other's eyes. "Are you hungry?" Jesse finally asked.
"Famished," Rachel admitted, cracking a smile.
"Good because there's pizza right over there," he pointed to the side edge of the stage. Rachel followed where he was pointing and could not believe that she had completely missed it when they had walked in.
"And beer," she added, grinning as she got up and ran over to the side of the stage to open the pizza box. There were even plates and napkins right next to the box.
Sitting on the edge of the stage, Rachel put a slice of pizza on both plates and handed one to Jesse along with a beer. "So how do you know Peter?" Rachel asked as she opened her beer.
"I met him one time when I came here for a concert during my NYU days. We started talking and struck up a friendship. He's a great guy and he lets me come here every once in awhile and do this," he explained, motioning towards the piano. "Although this is the first time that I've brought anyone else with me."
Rachel didn't know what to say to that. She was extremely flattered that she was the first and only person that Jesse had ever brought here. She couldn't believe he'd never brought Isla here. "Really?"
"Really," he replied, smiling at Rachel in a way that made her heart race. "You're the one person that I knew would love this as much I do."
She smiled at that before looking out at the darkened auditorium and asking, "Did you ever think that maybe Broadway would never happen for you?"
Jesse pondered her question before answering. "Yeah, I did," he told her honestly. Rachel was a little taken aback by his answer. That was not the answer that she had expected from the always confident Jesse St. James. He noticed her reaction, "Don't look so surprised."
"I just never imagined that…" she trailed off.
"What? That I'd doubt myself?" he asked.
"Well, yeah. Or doubt your talent," she replied.
"Rachel, as we both know, if talent was all it took to make it on Broadway then I would've been here a long time ago," he said. She nodded in agreement. "I auditioned a lot my second year here in New York. I had to take a break for awhile," he explained.
"You surprise me, Jesse St. James," she said, smiling warmly at him.
"Why?" he wondered. Slightly perplexed by her reaction to his admission that he'd had doubts about whether his future actually was on Broadway.
"The boy that I knew never would have admitted that," she told him.
"Believe me, I had similar thoughts when I was younger but I very rarely voiced them out loud. Besides, the boy you knew became a man." They sat there in comfortable silence for a few moments. Eating their pizza, drinking their beer and just enjoying each other's company.
"Can I tell you something?" Rachel finally asked as she finished eating. He nodded in response. "I was so jealous that you made it to Broadway before me."
"So now the truth comes out about why you ran away when I saw you at the stage door," he teased, remembering their conversation from the night before.
"That is not why," Rachel cried, incredulously, throwing her crumpled up napkin at Jesse causing him to laugh.
"I don't believe you," he said with an impish grin.
"Believe what you want," she scoffed as she jumped down from the stage to floor.
"Where are you going?" he asked as she began walking down the front row of seats.
"I want my own private concert," she told him as she walked over to the very center seat of the front row and sat down.
Jesse shook his head, smiling at her as he stood up and walked towards the piano. "Any special requests?" he asked.
"Your choice, since we don't have any sheet music," she replied.
So he sat down and thought about the various songs that he knew by heart for a moment. Finally deciding on one, his fingers hovered over the piano keys and he began playing. Rachel thought that she recognized the song. He looked at her as he began to sing and she immediately knew the song, "Baby Can I Hold You".
Seeing Jesse perform was still an amazing thing to behold. Sure, his voice was flawless, but it was the emotion that he put into the song as he sang it. It was almost like he was singing this song about himself and the relationship they once had. Rachel felt her heart ache at the thought.
When he began to sing the last verse – I love you/Is all that you can't say/Years gone by and still/The words don't come easily/Like I love you – his gaze was so intense that Rachel wanted to look away but couldn't. Finally he turned his head and looked straight ahead then shut his eyes tight as he sang the chorus one final time and finished the song. He didn't look at her but at the piano as they sat in silence for a moment. Then she began clapping.
"Jesse, that was beautiful," she said, standing up and walking towards the edge of the stage.
He looked over at her and smiled. "Thanks." As she hoisted herself back onto the stage, he asked, "Are you ready to get going?"
"Sure," she replied. They cleaned up their dinner and got their stuff together. Jesse text-messaged Peter to thank him and let him know they were leaving, then led the way out of the backstage area and to the side alley. Instead of getting a taxi right away, they decided to walk for a little while and talk.
More than once, Rachel found herself wanting to reach for Jesse's hand and link her fingers with his as they walked down the street side-by-side. Just friends, she thought to herself. She wanted to believe that, but the more time she was spending with Jesse the less she was starting to believe that they could ever be just friends.
Author's Note: If you're curious by chance, the versions of the two songs that I imagined Jesse and Rachel singing are not the original versions of either of those songs. Clannad's version of "Both Sides Now" is what I was listening to when I wrote Jesse and Rachel's duet and Ronan Keating's version of "Baby Can I Hold You" is exactly how I imagined Jesse singing the song only with Jesse's voice, of course. And I know you guys are probably wondering when in the hell Jesse and Rachel are finally going to get there and I promise you it is just around the corner, sort of. I will do my best to make it worth the wait.