Alright my lovelies, here it is! This chapter will either make or break Juice being accepted back in the club. So do your thing at the end, R&R, I love to hear what you guys have to say! Also let me know what you guys think please, Am I updating too soon, every two days or so, or do you guys like my frequent updates?
Chapter Eight
Vacation time was over, the following day Juice and Nikki rode back to Charming. Juices veins filled with anxiety of having to face Jax, not to mention Rat and Phil. He knows he put the two of them through hell that day Miles died. It all fell apart so fast, Juice couldn't stop it. Jax had everything going his way, if one of them had pulled the trigger, Jax wouldn't have batted an eyelash, and he'd have seen it as pay back for the missing drugs. He could provide a body, and he could wash his hands with it. Juice couldn't do that, he couldn't watch Rat and Phil sit there and hold the gun to their own head and pull the trigger, he gave them an ultimatum instead. Fifteen minutes searching for the missing drugs, the same drugs he had taken to get a sample to Eli. He would put the drugs back while everyone was looking, and there wouldn't be any questions asked.
If only Miles didn't cut through, if he wasn't such a lazy shit sometimes. If he would have just taken the long way around, Juice could have got the drugs back to the warehouse, and no one would have been hurt. But Miles didn't want to listen, and Juice didn't think he'd pull the trigger, but he did. Then he came after Juice, and he had to make a choice, live or die? He chose to live, and Miles got in the way. There isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't think about him. He apologizes every day, talks to him.
It's only when Nikki tightens her grip around his waist from behind him that he is suddenly made aware that they have pulled up to Teller Morrow. He can tell Nikki is nervous, how couldn't she be? This life, in the club, it wasn't something she knew about. All she knew was green grass and white picket fences, beautiful brick houses, family BBQ's on the weekends, while all the neighborhood kids play in the pool.
Juice warned her though. He told her everything that he has done, everything the club has done. It took her some time, but in the end she told him that maybe the violence that erupted in her family was just a stepping stone to get her to her new life with him.
He didn't want her to feel like that. He wanted her to feel safe with him, and ironically, despite all the shit he had told her, she had never felt safer. She told him she wouldn't leave him. She was going to be there for him no matter what. She would back him up, as long as he did the same for her. The ring on the chain was a physical promise, something she can see and feel and hold onto, literally giving her his word, which she wore next to her heart.
Nikki was the first to get off the bike as soon as Juice parked. His bike lined up with the rest of them, all neat in a row just like always. She handed him her helmet, and he put it away.
For a minute Juice just stood there, looking up at what he used to call home, what is still his home, but just seems like a distant memory now. There was a good chance that he wouldn't be welcomed back to SAMCRO. He wasn't ready for that. The MC was the only life he knew, and they were his family. Now he had just one more responsibility, he had Nikki. And if protecting her, and caring for her meant leave SAMCRO, He would have to do it.
"You alright, babe?" Nikki asked rubbing her hand up and down his back for encouragement.
"I have to be." Juice replied with a weak smile.
Hand in hand, they both walked up to the doors of the
twitchy like he always gets, but he wasn't going to back down, not today. Today was a day of reckoning auto repair shop, where he was met by Chibs.
"Juicy Boy!" Chibs loud gruff voice screeched out. It's how he welcomes everyone back, with his arms wide open. Juice found it more welcoming that he should have, but he'd take it anyway. "It's good you came back Juicy. Don't worry about anything, alright, lad? I've talked to the boys, it'll be alright." It wasn't until then that Juice felt the pre storm surge in his stomach. His anxiety had suddenly stormed through the roof. He wanted to get back on that bike, take his girl, and get the fuck out of dodge. But he wasn't the type of person to run away, he faced it head on.
With a supporting arm thrown around his shoulder, and the tender loving hand of his girlfriend in his hand, he had enough strength to walk in that club house again, and face his demons head on.
Nikki stayed outside, breathing in the fresh air. She didn't want to go in, she didn't want to see what the club was about, mainly because she wasn't ready. She was simply there for support, and she doubted she could be supportive if she saw the rows and rows of jail house pictures that adorned the wall, Juan Carlos "Juice" Ortiz included in the mural of pictures. Not to mention the skanks around the bar, or hanging on some of the men. She wasn't one of them, not by a long shot. Nikki was from a different world, brought up in a different life, with a loving family. She didn't know pain, not until her family was taken. She wanted to stay just a little bit pure, until things were settled more.
Juice took his seat at the Reaper, nervous and, he'd look the reaper in the eye and spit if he had to. Do the same to Jax if that's what needed to be done. For a moment if felt like old times, quiet, everyone around the table. The eye of the storm was smack dab in the middle of that table, it was calm, but moving quickly, and knowing that, as it passed by with its ugly teeth showing, it would rip its way through that room and leave everyone with ugly scares and bleeding hearts thrown on that fucking table, pulled right out of their chest, right in front of them.
"Glad you could make it, Juice." Venom leaking from his fangs, Juice could see it dripping. Because what he didn't know was, if he didn't make it, Mayhem would be the next step. If Juice had failed to show, it would prove that he was a coward, prove that he was in the wrong, and Jax was in the right, Juice would have been dead by the end of the night, most likely with Nikki by his side.
Juice doesn't respond, instead, with a slight nod of his head, and a smirk on his face, he waits to hear what else Jax has to say.
Jax takes the hint, and continues, "Chibs informed me that you were willing to come back, and tell the club why you left, why you ran away. I agreed there would be no mayhem vote against you, however, the rest of the guys don't know what I know. I can't promise your safety from them. The table is yours, it's time to come clean Juice, we'll have a vote at the end, stay or go." With that Jax fell silent, giving the table over to Juice.
Juice's mouth went dry, his palms were sweaty, and his brain was screaming at him to get the fuck out of there. Despite his nerves running on high, he stayed firm in his seat, making sure to look every single club member in the eye before talking. It was his own personal way of showing everyone he would take whatever would be dished out at the end of all of this.
All eyes were on him: Jax, Bobby, Chibs, Happy, Tig, Phil and Rat, and Juice was the center piece for all of them, waiting to hear what he had to say, if he would own up to what had happened, or if he would put it off on someone elses hands like he did with Miles.
Miles… That's where he started. True to his word, he owned up to everything, filled the club in on what went down that day. How every day after that seemed to be a downward spiral, a constant roller coaster that he couldn't get off of.
The guys listened quietly, giving Juice his time to speak. It wasn't until Jax name came up when he was explaining what happened with Darvany, and her death. How Jax used Juice to do his dirty work to buy back into the club, but never letting it go like he promised. There was always another dirty job to be done to keep Jax's hands clean. Juice followed every single order Jax threw his way, He was a good lap dog that way, true to his owner, or in this case the MC's president, followed through with every dirty command, right or wrong, never asked questions, but truly believed that every time would be the last time, which never was.
When it came time to give Jax up to the club, he did so, hesitant, but willing. He was tired, oh so tired, of being Jax's puppet. He was always pulling the strings, but never cut them loose, even when the puppet started to break, piece by fragile piece, and the strings began to knot together, Jax still did whatever he could to keep pulling those strings. No those same strings were so knotted up and the puppet was so broken he no longer cared what happened to the guy pulling them. This was his personal way of cutting himself free of those knotted and mangled strings.
After Juice spoke the truth about Darvany's death and the role him and Jax played in it, and how it was Jax's way of allowing Juice back in the club with no mayhem for killing a brother. The entire room fell deafly silent.
Juices chest felt the weight of that silence sitting on top of him, looking down and laughing in his face. Bobby and especially Chibs, looking over to Jax, sitting at the Gavel, his jaw clenched together, eyebrows furrowed. He was clearly pissed off. Juice was never supposed to spill the dirty laundry, but he couldn't keep it inside anymore. He was literally buckling under the weight of it all.
The club was never supposed to be this difficult. Chibs had recruited Juice because he was a computer geek, and had a knack for photography. The little shit was talented. He kept the systems up to date, kept the "non-working" cameras in order, and if there was anything special needed in between, they needed photos or proof of something, Juice was their undercover cat. He had light work load, because that's all his tender frame could carry. He was never supposed to be involved with the kills, sure he knew how to work the gun, and didn't mind carrying one, that's what happens when you join the MC, you carry and your prepared to use it, but never murder, it was always self defense, and Jax happened to exploit that one tiny issue.
Juice had tried to make it right with Miles, was willing to take his own life, hand himself the mayhem he deserved, he was ready for it.
"We need to think about this. We need to talk about this." Bobby said.
Juice instantly stood up to leave, before Chibs spoke. "Jax, you too. Rat go with them, make sure nothing goes down." Rat did with a nod, following Juice out, Jax right behind him. Juice didn't look back, didn't acknowledge Jax, wouldn't give him the time of day. He's had enough, Jax has taken enough, and Juice was done with that.
Juice went outside, where Nikki was sitting at a table, her knee bouncing up and down. It had been something she always did when her nerves were on over drive. As soon as she saw Juice, she stood up, eyes filled with worry. "What happened, baby?" She asked, falling into his arms. He pulled her close, kissing her forehead. "Don't worry babe, everything will be fine. The worst they can do is strip my patch."
Just then Jax's face popped out of the door, before stepping outside, lighting up a cigarette. He stared Juice down. Nikki instantly felt uncomfortable, and automatically knew who the blond haired man was, "That's Jax isn't it?" She asked. Juice nodded and answered back with a faint, "Yeah." He kept her in his arms, and held her close to him.
"Can I speak to you for a moment?" Jax suddenly said. Juice tilted his head, looking concerned, but didn't say anything.
"No man, you have to wait for the guys…"
"Shut up Rat. Go back inside." Jax shouted.
"You know I can't do that, Chibs said…"
"I know what Chibs said, but Chibs isn't the president, is he? Remember your place, Prospect, now go inside."
"It's ok Rat." Juice said, nodding towards the door to the club house. Rat shot Juice a look of concern, one that clearly said If you were smart you wouldn't be doing this. And maybe that is just the way it is, maybe Juice isn't so smart after all.
Juice turned to Nikki, kissed her and said, "Stay here with Rat. I'll be right back." Before following Jax to the side of the building, Juices stomach lurched into his throat. He knew what was coming his way.
Jax stood up straight, legs shoulder width apart, "You betrayed me."
Juice stood in front of him, trying desperately to keep a straight face, but he was never good at that. His eyes filled with tears, because still, in some sick twisted way, he was still somebody's puppet, and he was betraying someone, he had ratted Jax out to the club. Now Juice would have to hold the weight of the clubs decision, whatever that decision would be, would stain Juices hands.
"I'm sorry Jax. You know I was never cut out for this. I never wanted to hurt the club. I never wanted to betray anyone. I never wanted to kill anyone, but I was ready. I never meant to kill Miles, and I was more than ready to deal with that problem. You gave me an out. You made me take another life. Kill a woman to prove my loyalty to the club." Juice looked away, with a crooked smirk on his face, "We never kill women or kids. We also never take mayhem into our own hands after a vote was passed denying mayhem." Juice paused, "You're not as innocent as you think you are Jax. Remember what you did to Clay? So don't stand there and try to make me out to be the bad guy, because I'm not. I'm here, and I own up to all the shit I've done, which is more than what you have done. You just hand off your dirty work to everyone around you." With that said, Jax nodded his head, his face distorted into disgust. His arm cocked back, and then lurched forward, connecting with Juices face. Juice stumbled, lost his balance, and fell to the floor. Shaking his head, Juice got back up, and stood toe to toe with Jax, who punched him again, this time busting his lip. Juice was on the ground, and this time Jax didn't wait for Juice to get up this time, instead, Jax stood over him, his fist repeatedly connecting with Juices face.
It wasn't until a rush of booted footsteps running towards them that the rest of the club saw what was happening. Bobby made the simplest verbal response to the scene in front of him, "Holy shit!"
It took Chibs and Happy to pull Jax off of Juice.
"What the hell is going on?" Bobby asked, pushing Jax up against the wall.
"Nothing man." Jax said.
Chibs helped Juice up off the ground, supporting most of his weight. Juices head rolled to the side, he was half conscious.
Sometime during the scuffle Nikki had ran to see what the commotion was. Nikki was screaming and crying. Watching the blood seep from her boyfriend's face only brought her back in time, and she began to question how Juice had even got involved in a gang with such violent out bursts.
Chibs took Juice into the club house, where he sat him down to clean up his face. Nikki followed right behind them, sniffling and crying as she did so.
"I'm sorry Chibs." Juice whispered.
"Hey…" Chibs said, firm but gentle, just like his hand placed at the nap of Juices neck, "It's alright boy. We'll figure all this out."
"I never wanted any of this to happen." Juice said, tears rolling down his face.
"I know Juicy boy, I know."