Thank you Anon and gypsy rosalie for their kind reviews. I actually have a confession to make, I'm in a bit of a dilemma as to how to end this fic... I'll probably just keep writing until I figure it out, but if you're willing to make any suggestions please feel free to leave a review and let me know. It's just that depression is an ongoing thing, there's no natural end...well there is but that's not the direction I want to go with this fic... anyway I'll get on with the fic.

Chapter 24 (or "Alex Has a Mini Existential Crisis")

The curser blinked in the middle of the screen as Alex lay on her bed, staring at her blog. Blink, blink, blink. Alex blinked too, and then kept on staring. Her lips twisted into a frown and then she reached out a hand and pulled her laptop shut.

She was just not feeling her blog lately, she just hadn't been able to find the energy to research or write. She'd even stopped being able to listen to Hayley's gushing about blogging where once she had happily gushed along with her sister. Something had changed. She had changed. The world had changed...What was change?

What indeed, Alex mused. What was anything in this world? They were all spinning a hundred thousand kilometres an hour around the sun, with only gravity stopping them from going spinning off into space. It was enough to drive anyone to insanity. It was a wonder not everyone was hiding in bed, holding on for dear life.

We put a lot of faith in scientists, Alex decided. They could tell us that we are being held to the earth by our sheer will to live and we'd believe them if they had a colourful graph and complex looking math equations. Alex couldn't help but be thankful that will to live had nothing to do with it though, otherwise she would've gone flying off into space a long time ago.

'Hey!' Alex started as her door flew open and her sister came bounding in, a mass of brown curls.

'Hey, did you want to sit and work on our blogs together? I made some tea,' Hayley beamed at her sister. Alex sighed.

'About that...'

'What's going on?' Hayley hovered nervously in the doorway.

'I just don't think I want to blog anymore.'

'No, don't let a bad day get in the way of what you want to do,' Hayley crossed the room and patted her sister on the shoulder.

'But I don't want to do it,' Alex felt so free saying the words out loud.

'Then why did you do it?'

'Well I thought I did, and blogging made me happy for a little while...'

'But not anymore?'

'No, now it feels more like a chore,' Alex confessed. 'That's okay though, it was exactly what I needed at the time, and I really did enjoy it, but now it's time for me to find something else to bring me joy.'

'Oh, I'm going to miss sitting with you and writing posts,' Hayley looked rather crestfallen.

'Why did you enjoy that so much? It wasn't as if we talked while we were posting. We were only in the same room as each other, that was the extent of our contact.'

'Sometimes I don't know what to say to you,' Hayley frowned. 'You're going through this big thing, and I can see you struggling, and it just feels weird to talk about normal things when you're dealing with so much.'

'Oh,' Alex's hand hovered over her sister's shoulder, but she thought better of it and shoved her hands back into her pockets.

'It's not like I really knew what to talk to you about at the best of times,' Hayley gave a bitter smirk.

'You don't need to talk to me about anything special,' Alex explained. 'I just want to feel normal. To bicker over who gets the last pancake, to meddle in Luke's life, to roll our eyes at mum's freakouts.'

'She does freak out a lot,' Hayley giggled.

'Remember that time she found out you were stuffing your bras,' Alex laughed.

'Remember that time Dad brought the dog home?'

'Remember that family photo?'

'Remember that time she tried to run for council?' Tears were running down the two sisters' cheeks as they giggled at their mother and her hysterics, mimicking the high pitch and hoarseness that came with a whined "Phil, do something!" Alex giggled and looked at her sister, wiping the tears of laughter out of her eyes.

'See, this is what I want, my sister. Whether that's tormenting me, or beside me as we gang up on Luke, I love you because of the sister you are, not the one you're trying to be.'

'Awwww' Hayley simpered, pulling Alex into a hug that squashed her head against her breasts.

'Still stuffing I see,' Alex whipped a tissue out of her sister's top.

'Yeah, but there's a really cute guy in my photography class.'

'Of course there is,' Alex teased. 'Nothing's changed there.'

So please leave reviews to keep the inspiration fairies well-fed. Also in the meantime if you want to check out some more of my writing, I've put a link in my profile to both a blog with some original poetry and short stories, and a collab fanfic account I have with a friend of mine. Until next week, keep calm and review, follow, favourite :)