Chapter Eight:
Pain.
That was the first thing I registered in the morning. I woke up with a pounding headache. My limbs felt as if they could fall off. I wished my head would fall off, so that it would ease the pain behind my eyes. My throat was sore, too. And my ears had a strange buzzing noise in them.
I propped myself up on one elbow, and a wave of dizziness nearly overwhelmed me. Head-rush. I moaned loudly as I collapsed face-down back onto my bed.
I heard some quiet giggles. "Good morning," I heard Lissy say.
Even Lissy quiet tones seemed like a punch into my eardrums.
"Holy crap," I groaned. Lissy giggled again. "What time is it?"
"Almost eight. You slept the whole day yesterday. Thought you were dead." I heard Lissy say, distractedly. I could hear her quill scribbling furiously against some parchment. She was somewhere out of my direct line of sight, so I couldn't see her - no way was I going to make the same mistake of trying to sit up again. "I have never been this hungover," I whispered into my pillow.
I felt the mattress at the end of the bed give slightly, telling me that Lissy had sat down at the foot of the bed. "Feeling ok?" she asked.
I answered this with some fairly colourful words that I deemed a fit response, but Lissy just laughed again. "That's a no, then," she said. I could tell by the shape of her voice that she was smiling.
I racked my brain, trying to think back to last night. All I could summon up was an image of hundreds of red and gold swirly things. I rolled onto my front, my red hair splayed out across the pillow. Even this small movement sent waves of nausea over my body. "Just be straight with me," I instructed Lissy. "How bad was I last night?"
"You had about five cups of every type of alcohol we brought," a new voice said. Aphelia. "And you snogged about...I think it was seven different guys, by the end. First Robert, then Jamethon and Jones, then Zach in Slytherin -"
"Zach?" I groaned. Ew. "Are you serious? I know I have bad taste when I'm drunk, but I would not sink that low."
"You did," Lissy giggled.
"Yeah, and Joshua, Drew and David," Aphelia added. My eyes flew open.
"David?" I shouted, whipping myself into a sitting position. I nearly collapsed from the head rush, but somehow managed to stay upright. "I snogged David? My friend, David? Oh, crap!"
Lissy grimaced sympathetically. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, at then saw Felicity emerge through the door.
"You telling her about last night? Did you tell her about the lap dance?" Felicity laughed. My mouth fell open.
"Lap dance?" I cried. I looked wildly from Felicity, to Aphelia, to Lissy. "Tell me I didn't give anyone a lap dance!"
They all laughed.
"Not you," Lissy said.
"Justin," Felicity smirked. I gaped.
"Justin Schiffer-Bones?"
"To Natasha in Slytheirn," Aphelia confirmed.
"Wow," I mouthed. All the noise had made my headache rebound fiercely. Suddenly Three pairs of hands were pulling me up.
"Woah, watch it!" I cried, stumbling around unsteadily on my feet. "Why are you making me get up, it's Saturday," I moaned.
"Quidditch practise," Aphelia said.
"Lia, I can't play in this state." I said, rolling my eyes. My body felt so feeble that it was taking all my strength not to collapse back onto my bed.
"Good thing it's not until noon, then," she said. Lissy smiled, and Felicity left to 'do some things and get some people.' I really hoped she wasn't planning anything illegal. There'd been enough trouble last time.
I let my friends guide me down to the Great Hall. I was too wobbly on me feet to complete the journey alone. As we were walking I demanded a fuller description of last night.
"Well..." Lissy mumbled, looking down at her feet after I posed the question of the last night. Aphelia was more direct abut answering me. She clapped her hands in a let's get started sort of way, sending little little spikes of pain radiating through my brain. She filled me in about certain parts of the night. Vague memories began forming in my head, like kissing Jones and Jamethon, seeing Robert kissing blonde girl - Aphelia told me her name was Mae-Rose, and she was the Keeper for Hufflepuff - and most notably, Aphelia knocking Sharon out. When we got down to them Great Hall I stopped her.
"Ok, just fill me in on what happened after the balloons. I can't think of anything that happened after the balloons," I said, sliding into a seat at the Gryffindor table. Lissy giggled.
"That's actually good," she told me. Aphelia, who was smirking, nodded.
"Yeah, you went a bit crazy after the balloons. Not in a sociopath kind of way," she said hurriedly, "but you were properly drunk by that point. I saw you dancing with practically every guy in the room. You only snogged three guys after the balloons though, so that's a plus. Drew was the first, I think you were with him for about five minutes. Then you seemed to get bored, and you found Joshua. You were dancing with him for about fifteen minutes, then you slapped him for some reason and went off. Lissy saw you chatting to David, and then five minutes later I saw you guys snogging. The you went up to the front of the room and started to attempt a pole dance...and that was when we decided to call it a night," Aphelia finished.
"I tried to pole dance?" I groaned. Lissy smiled.
"You weren't bad," she said, apparently trying to contain some giggles. I gave her a worthy response to that. Then I said, "What about David? How did I end it with him?"
Aphelia shrugged, and took a bite off some toast. "Who knows? I didn't see that part. Last I saw was you two walking off together after the party."
"He had his arm around you," Lissy added.
It took a moment for this to sink in. "You mean I didn't slap him or nothing? Does he think we're going out?"
"Probably," Lissy began, but then Aphelia elbowed her in the ribs. "No," Lissy then corrected herself with mock seriousness. "Definitely not." She shook her head, her curls bouncing.
I had just taken a bite of an apple - all I could handle considering my sorry state - before Felicity, with Brooke and Agnes in tow, swished over to me, pulled the three of us up and ordered us up to the common room. "Why?" Lissy asked.
"Lily didn't open her presents!" Agnes squealed, as if this solved everything. Then she looked over at Aphelia. "Lia, you're built for heavy-lifting so much more than I am, what with your strong jaw and thick body. Would you mind getting all the presents up to the common-room?"
Aphelia looked displeased, then stalked off - not with grumbling to me, "She does know that things can be lifted with magic, doesn't she?"
We went up to the common room. Lissy gave the password - Animagus - and then Felicity shooed out all the second-years, yelling, "Go away, midgets!" Polite as ever.
So we commandeered the soft red sofas, and Felicity, Agnes and Brooke chatted to each other for ten minutes about what colour they were going to do their nails next weekend. Lissy and I began work on our Herbology essay - how to categorise different plant families. Tedious, but I tried hard in Herbology because I liked Professor Longbottom. And it was better than trying to join in with Agnes, Brooke and Felicity's drivel. Sometimes I wondered if they would ever have a half decent conversation. Right now it seemed unlikely.
Finally an indignant Aphelia turned up, and when I saw what she was levitating in front of her I felt my mouth plummet to the floor. It was a huge sack of presents. Dad had once told me about this Muggle man named Father Christmas, and how he flew around the sky in a cart pulled by deer and had huge sacks of presents. The sack in front of Aphelia was at least as big as one of those sacks. Only all the stuff inside was mine.
"This is all for me?" I laughed at the sheer ridiculousness of it. Brooke shrugged.
"They all had to bring presents, it was a condition of the invite. So they all brought presents."
"Oh my Merlin, Lily, you have got to be the luckiest non-gorgeous girl in the entire school!" Agnes squealed. My stomach clenched with the force of not saying something back to her. But I'd already done enough damage to my reputation at the party.
So the sifting through the presents began. We made no attempt to try and record who'd given me what - it was to exhausting. Aphelia gave me a new top and jumper - and a thick, metal bat. For Sharon had been expertly engraved into the handle. Lissy gave me a whole batch of Smart-Answer Quills and a pair of cashmere gloves. Agnes, Felicity and Brooke had all chipped in to give me an expensive - what Brooke called, designer - dress. I'd never heard of the shop they said it was from. It was a Muggle and Muggle-born thing. Still, the short, detailed pink number they'd bought me crossed dress robes off my wish list, even if the colour would clash with my hair. When I thanked them, Agnes started babbling things like that it had been on sale, and that 'Daddy' got a seventy-five percent discount anyway, and it was their parents who had paid what was left anyway, believing the money was for a school trip, so it had really cost them nothing. I don't know if they've ever heard the term 'quit while you're ahead' or not.
I was surprised to find that my friends appeared to have intercepted my mail, as all the presents from my friends and family were there in the sack too. I was amazed to see the new Nimbus 2025 buried amid the pile of wrappings, with a note saying Love from Mum and Dad x. I'd been expecting a Cleansweep at best, but a Nimbus was terrific! Now maybe I'll have a chance at beating Ravenclaw in the next match, I thought as I admired the shine of the sleeked bristles. James sent me a new, tan leather book satchel, Rose sent a box of French chocolate, and I saw Hugo had given a knitted, woollen beret to me. My various Aunts and Uncles had sent things like new books and cakes - the one that stood out in my head was the strawberry lemon pie from Uncle Percy and Aunt Audrey. Albus' present surprised me. At first I just thought he'd sent a card, however when I opened the envelope two pieces of parchment fell out. The first was blank, and the second read;
Dear Lil' Sister,
Say it with me; I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.
This is a secret stolen by James, passed on to me, and now passed on to you.
You'll thank me later.
Al
P.S Remember, when you're finished, your mischief is managed.
I disregarded this as one of his attempts at humour while Lissy picked up Al's letter and red it through, probably trying to decipher his meaning. But I'd think about my brother later.
There were lots of other gifts to sort through, given the amount of people that had shown up at my party. I let Aphelia pulverise the present from Robert with the bat she'd given me before I'd even opened it. The one that was labelled as being from Mae-Rose was immediately set fire to as well. Then it was Aguamenti-ed as I hadn't paid attention to the surroundings - the carpet had caught fire along with it.
"Shame," Brooke said, picking up the dripping, charred mess that had once been Mae-Rose's present. Lissy and I were the only ones who looked at her in surprise. "This looks like it was a really cool top," she added, when she saw our faces. There's something called tact. Maybe you could apply it sometimes.
Most of the presents were not invigorating - after a while Felicity and rest began snatching a couple of them up if I announced I didn't want them. Because really, how many T-shirts and pairs of gloves does one person need? Even with the others taking a present here and there, the pile remained unbelievably huge. Finally though, we managed to reduce the mountain of presents to a heap of wrappings, the paper looking like shrapnel after a particularly colourful bomb.
"So, what now?" Brooke asked, pulling on a top that some guy named Edward had given me.
"I need to go practise my Quidditch," Aphelia said.
"Oh, why do you have to be such a buzz-kill, Aphie?" Agnes whined. I saw Aphelia's nostrils flare at Agnes' use of the despised nickname.
"Don't - call - me - Aphie." she hissed. " And I'm being a buzz-kill because I got a bit too buzzed last night, and today, yeah, a bit of it needs to be killed."
I smirked. "I need to go to that thing too," I remembered, dread coursing through me as the hangover headache rebounded with a bang.
"Your new broom," Lissy held up my Nimbus.
"Right, thanks," I sighed. Normally I'd have loved for a chance to ride the new broom, but today I had no idea if I'd be capable of sitting on it without plummeting to an early grave. I heard Felicity mumble something that I didn't quite catch to Brooke as Aphelia and I left the common room - and then Agnes' loud, squeaky giggle about it - then the Fat Lady swung shut behind us.
"You got up to a bit of mischief last night, didn't you?" she said, her painted lips smirking. I groaned.
"If you mock me, please do it when I have a killer hangover, it makes life so enjoyable," I said, before grabbing Aphelia's arm and pulling her off down the stairs, the Fat Lady calling after us "Nothing to be embarrassed about, Vi and I have had our fair share of wine..."
We carried on down to the hall in near silence - if we did speak, we kept our voices hushed so as not to rouse the pounding headaches. When we reached the pitch, a couple of people approached us and complimented us on 'the best party Hogwarts has seen for many years'. I felt a little warmth in my stomach that I thought might have been a glow of pride that yes, the best party Hogwarts has had in ages was my birthday party. Then I felt the horrid, foul bile rising in my throat, and realised it was a warmth of an entirely different variety. Aphelia stood guard as I ducked behind a bush to do what I needed to. How in the name of Merlin's pants can I play Quidditch like this?
Aphelia helped me over to the pitch, half-supporting, half-carrying me.
"Lia, I can't play like this," I moaned.
"Yes, you can, 'cause if you don't then Sharon will be better than you and will beat your arse so hard at the next match that you will cry like a baby," she said, in a matter-of-fact fashion. I inwardly cursed her good motivation. So, half an hour later, I found myself in the midst of a mid-air tussle for the Quaffle. Every sound, be it an owl flying over the stadium or Aaron blowing his whistle, was like somebody had grabbed a knife and was stabbing my eardrums with it.
We'd been up for about forty-five minutes - I was incredibly close to begging for death - when Aaron blew his whistle twice, signaling for a time-out. I gratefully flew down to the ground, wishing for nothing more than to crawl into bed and die. As my teammates landed around me, I noticed that Hippelby was standing next to Aaron on the pitch, his fat belly trembling.
Aaron coughed. "Er, Aphelia, Professor Hippelby wants a word with you. The rest of you can go back up," he said. A couple of people went back to casually passing the Quaffle back and forth, but the majority of us stayed on the ground. It was then that I realised Parkinson was standing behind Hippelby - his incredible fatness had shrouded her from view before. Hippelby made a squeaky, wheezy sound that might a been a cough.
"Right Miss Clarke, Miss Parkinson here tells me that you, ah..." Hippelby turned to look at Sharon.
"Punched me in the face, sir," Sharon simpered, her eyes too wide for genuine innocence.
"Ah, yes, that was it. Do you deny these allegations?" he wheezed. I glanced at Aphelia. She had gone pale, but her face was resolvedly firm.
"I don't know what she's talking about, sir," Aphelia lied. Hippelby looked surprised.
"Miss Parkinson here is quite certain it was you, Miss Clarke," Hippelby stammered. I couldn't help but think what a poor excuse for a professor this man was.
Aphelia shrugged. "Nope, I didn't punch anyone." It took all my inner strength not to go into hysterics at that one. I saw Aaron go a put an arm around Aphelia's shoulders.
"Actually sir, we'd all had quite a bit of Butterbeer last night -" butterbeer? Don't make me laugh! "- so perhaps Sharon didn't know, er, what she was seeing...?" Aaron trailed off. A couple of people looked slightly embarrassed as he'd just brought to attention the amount of alcohol - albeit butterbeer - consumed at my birthday party last night.
At this moment Sharon burst forwards. "No!" she shrieked. "I know what I saw! I wasn't drunk -"
"Liar," I muttered, smirking. Sharon shot me a look of contempt.
"- and I know that she," here so pointed a finger at Aphelia in a threatening way, "punched me! It's against school rules, isn't it Professor?"
Hippelby started. "I, um...yes, I believe it is, that is to say, it should be...Miss Clarke, much as I detest hearing about such displays of violence, you have been called to our attention about previous offences. This would not, ah, be...what's the phrase? Out of character," he said, wringing his hands. Sharon smirked triumphantly. "See? It happened, I swear! Ask her if you don't believe me, she was standing right there!"
I took me a second to realise that Sharon was now talking about me. I rolled my eyes.
"Parkinson, she didn't punch you, you were just drunk off your head. Was it really worth intruding on our practise just to carry on this petty dispute?" I said, in my most sickeningly sweet voice possible. Sharon had such a high pitch, girly, posh little voice it honestly made imitating her the best fun I'd had all day. Sharon's face seemed to darken to the shade of a glowing ember - and I knew that, like the ember, any second she would burst into flames.
"She did! I know she did! Please, sir, you've got o believe me! She's been bullying me all year! She's done all kinds of horrid things to me, you wouldn't believe me if I told you!" Parkinson screamed.
"That's probably right," Aphelia muttered beneath her breath. I stifled a laugh at that one.
"Enough!" Hippelby squeaked. "Miss Clarke, you will report to detention in my office at six o'clock sharp this evening."
"But, sir, she didn't do anything wrong!" Aaron called out. I looked over at him, surprised. I couldn't remember if he'd been there or not, but surely he'd have heard by now? No, he looks like he honestly believes us...Merlin, it's surprisingly fun to be in the wrong, flat-out lying to a teacher!
"Professor, that's not fair!" Aphelia protested, whilst Sharon smirked. Hippelby frowned.
"Detention at six, and ten house points," he squeaked. I shot a look at Aphelia, surveying her face. She looked so forlorn - she hadn't had detention in a long time. I was pretty used to it. I hadn't had one so far this year, as I was being sickeningly good, but last year I'd been pretty much occupied with it every night, for saying things to teachers I probably shouldn't have. Detention was like a second home to me. Maybe a third, actually - Hogwarts itself was a second home to me. And being rude to teachers was second nature.
"Oh, piss off, Hippelby! Aphelia didn't fucking do anything, and you sure as hell know it! You're just to much of a thick idiot to believe the shit that Sharon-fucking-Parkinson tells you!" I yelled, adrenaline running through my blood.
Watching everyone's reaction was very fun. Aaron looked as if he was about to laugh. Parkinson looked outraged. Aphelia looked stunned. Hippelby looked as if he were an angry mouse who had just been denied cheese.
"Detention for you too, Miss Potter. You'll be joining Miss Clarke in my office at six, for you language. Maybe we can -"
"Wash your mouth out with carbolic soap," I saw Aphelia mouth, precisely in time to Hippelby's words. Every time I'd been rude to him in the past, he always said the age-old, cliché expression. Nobody said anything as Hippelby stumbled away, Sharon almost dancing along behind him with the joy of getting her way. Then Scarlett said, "Did you say all that so that Lia wouldn't have to go to detention on her own?
"Was it so transparent?" I laughed, pleased with the outcome. Scarlett giggled too.
"Nice one," she said, holding up her hand. Bewildered I slapped it, hoping that was what she'd meant. She grinned. "Righteous," she said, before going back to her broom and taking off. Righteous? Then Aphelia hugged me. "Thank you for not letting me go to detention on my own," she said, releasing me.
"What, you thought I was going to let you take all the fun?" I grinned. Aphelia grinned back as she remounted her broom. I swung a leg over my new Nimbus, then flew off to rejoin the team, ignoring the sudden wave of nausea that had come on.
After practise ended, Lia and I grabbed some lunch, then decided to go and finish our Herbology essays. Mine was nearly done, so I said that Aphelia could copy mine. We had just walked into the Entrance Hall when Aphelia remembered she'd left all her books down at the Quidditch pitch after the team practise, so I headed up without her.
The common room was mainly deserted, only a handful of first years were sitting in the red armchairs by the fireplace, looking excitedly at the pile of stuff that I remembered I had yet to move. I went over to gather my things, when I realised on of them was holding the letter form Al. I snatched it off him.
"Hey, give me that, it's mine!" I cried - then I realised who it was. It was Lysander, and his friends Sophie and Charlie. Sophie was holding a piece of parchment in her hands.
"Hi, Lily! Are these all yours?" Sophie breathed in wonderment. I shrugged.
"I had a birthday party last night, and what can I say, I got a lot of stuff."
"Why wasn't I invited?" Lysander scowled.
"Because there were loads of Nargles and Wrackspurts there. You'd have hated it," I told him, watching him shudder with unease. We - as in the Potter and Weasley clan - were yet to tell him that his greatest fear was of ridiculous imaginary creatures. We couldn't bear too, as it made life so fun.
"Here you go, Lily, Sophie was just looking at your parchment," Charlie said, taking the parchment off Sophie. I took it back, but was surprised to see loads of strange, black lines on it.
"Hey, you drew on it!" I exclaimed.
"No! It was like that when we found it! It was just lying next to the pile on the floor!" Sophie stammered, trying to get words out in the right order to form a vaguely coherent sentence.
I shrugged. "Whatever, it's just parchment."
"The seventh-years were fiddling with it. The one with really curly hair!" Lysander added, looking relieved that I wasn't angry.
"Uh, Lily?" Charlie said, leaning forwards in his seat.
"What?" I asked, flicking a strand of hair over my shoulder as I gathered up my presents.
"We saw something weird on it. These things that moved," Sophie whispered dramatically.
"Yeah, but I saw..." Charlie was interrupted mid-sentence by Lysander saying, "It says something on the front, too!"
"Guys!" Charlie muttered, looking down. It didn't look like he was going to tell me what he'd seen. Probably not important, something like a fly had walked on it. He seemed like that kind of little boy.
"Look, I don't have time for this, guys, I need to work on an essay, then I have detention with Hippelby. Bye!" I rolled my eyes, picking up my satchel and flicking my wand to levitate the now re-filled sack of presents up in front of me so that I wouldn't have to carry it.
"Bye!" Sophie smiled.
"See you!" Lysander called after me, as Charlie said, "But Lily!"
Aphelia didn't turn up in time for us to work on our essays together - I supposed this was most likely because a certain Aaron had been down at the pitch when she'd arrived there, and she'd become slightly, ah...preoccupied. I just hoped they'd make sure she was in time for our detention. When my essay was done, I worked on the Sempiternus Candle - we were studying how best to join each of the element in the Candle. It was an unusual project, but surprisingly hard. I hadn't thought that building a candle could be so complicated.
At ten to six, I packed up my things and made my way down to Hippelby's office. I needed to get there in plenty of time so he wouldn't keep me late tonight. I was wondering about what Hippelby might make me do tonight, when I suddenly found my face buried in a mass of red hair. I quickly stepped back, as the only people with that shade of hair were the people I was related to. I realised I'd crashed headfirst into Hugo.
"Hey, Lil'Cousin," Hugo chuckled. I scowled at his use of the patronizing nickname James and so wittily invented for me when I was little. By mixing my name with the words 'little' and whatever relation I was to the family member in question, you got guaranteed fun for all the family!
"What's so wrong my real name?" I scowled.
"Hello to you to," Hugo smirked. "I haven't spoken to you in ages."
"Yeah, seems about right," I said, trying to move past him. He spread his arms apart, filling the narrow staircase so that I couldn't pass him.
"Why are you in such a hurry?" Hugo laughed. "Meeting...who is it this week, Robert?"
"Detention," I said as I ducked under his arms. "And Robert and I broke up."
"Oh, that's right," he smirked. "Because David came in last night after your party looking like he'd won the lottery."
I stopped a couple of steps down from Hugo. "Do we have to do this now?" I sighed.
"Yeah, we do," Hugo said, suddenly serious. "Lil, the guy likes you. I mean, really likes you. Don't be mean to him. He's a nice guy, remember?"
I rolled my eyes and turned to face him. "Yeah, I remember. That's why I was friends with him for years."
Hugo sighed. "You know what I mean, Lily. He's not like those other douches. He's my friend, and yours." I rolled my eyes and checked my watch.
"Hugo, I've got to go, or I'll be late for Hippelby," I sighed. Hugo raised his eyebrows.
"You're avoiding confrontation. Ok, I get that you don't want to talk about it right now," I started to walk away, but he grabbed my arm. "But I also get that you don't like him in the same way he likes you."
I groaned, pulling my arm away from him. "Hugo, I was drunk! You know I do crazy crap when I'm drunk!"
"Well, that's true..."
"Look, I'll talk to you later, all right?" I sighed with exasperation.
"Whatever, Lils," Hugo sighed, surrendering. He got about five steps up, before turning around and asking, "Hey, you didn't pass Aaron on your way down, did you?"
I frowned. "I thought he was at the pitch."
Hugo looked surprised. "Er, no. He told me like, ten minutes ago in the library that he was heading up here."
I was mildly surprised. "I thought he was with Lia this afternoon."
"Where'd you get that idea? He's been with me and Jones since your Quidditch practise. Anyway, just wondering. See you round, Lils," Hugo said, turning to walk up the stairs. I didn't bother calling after him - I needed to get to my detention with Hippelby, and what would I say anyway? Sorry I snogged your best friend and am now about to crush his heart. Whoops. Actually, I'd love to say that. But with a reputation to regain, better not.
I headed down to Hippelby's office, checking over my shoulder for any signs of Aphelia. I assumed she must already be there, punctual as she is. I knocked on Hippelby's door, pleased with myself for being right on time, to the minute. Hippelby opened the door, clutching in his fat hand a slice of Battenberg cake.
"Ah, Miss Potter,, right on time," he chirped. He craned his neck to look over my shoulder.
"Any sign of Miss Clarke, I presumed she would be coming with you?"
"Nope, no sign of her," I shrugged. "So what d'you want me to do?"
Hippelby ushered me into his office. I was surprised by how fancy it was - very pink and girly, too. All fluffy cushions and lace footrests.
"I would like you to be cutting these salamanders into square inches. I made a promise to Priya that I would get these ingredients to her by tomorrow, and I have no time whatsoever to do it myself! She's experimenting with entirely new ingredients for some potion or other..." I got the impression he was talking to himself by this point. After another five minutes he stopped talking about salamanders and 'Priya' - who I guessed was Professor Jollieminda - and gestured me to a seat in the corner of his spacious office, pointed at a bucket of dead salamanders, and said, "Righty-o, chip chop! Hop to it!" then ambled off back to his velvet armchair singing, "Hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to work we go..."
By this point I was honestly concerned for his health. He was bonkers.
I chopped salamanders for what seemed like an eternity, willing Aphelia to show up to ease the boredom. Really, I mean, I only swore at Hippelby so that she wouldn't have to come here alone! Now she doesn't even show up! Talk about ungrateful!
After an entire hour Hippelby was forced to let me go. As he showed me out of his office he was muttering things about Aphelia to himself, and asked me to tell her from him that she'd lost thirty points by not turning up to her detention. It wasn't late, but what with the strenuous day I'd had and the hangover I'd barely been concealing, I was exhausted, so instead of carrying out Hippelby's request, the moment I arrived back in my dormitory, I collapsed onto my bed and fell straight asleep.