35 Love Is On the Way
Puck gave Rachel's hand a squeeze, "You'll do great," He hoped she believed him. It was going to be a miserable week for both of them otherwise.
"Do you think it'll help that Mercedes and Kurt are auditioning too?" Rachel asked worriedly. "Mike is going for dance so that's a different set of judges. And Santana said she doesn't want to sing professionally. Which is too bad because she's so good, not that I need more excellent competition but-"
Puck cut her off with another squeeze of her hand, "Relax. Kurt and Mercedes being here...that just means you'll outshine them here the way you do in Glee. You work harder than anyone else baby."
"I wish you were going out for Julliard too," She admitted softly.
"Hey, I love music, you know I do. But I'm not good enough for a scholarship, not yet. I can get into NYU and take some classes at Tisch," Puck reminded her. "I know I'm good, but I haven't worked at it all my life the way you have. That makes a difference. 'Sides, I'm a lock for the basketball scholarship. Coach got the word this morning. Between that and the recompense from Jacob...I'll be okay for school."
"I'm sorry I'm so-" Rachel shook her head and Puck tugged on her hand. "All right, I'm just so nervous. This is the rest of my life."
"No," Puck stopped walking and stood in front of her, facing this girl he loved so much. "No, its one audition. There'll be others. I'll drive you to New York to audition in their own auditorium if you don't make the cut here. But you'll get in. Rachel, trust me. When you're...yourself. When you're everything that I see in you, all the kindness and criticism and babble and passion and the million other things that make you Rachel... you're unbeatable. The only thing stopping you is you."
He watched as she took a deep breath and looked up at him, "No one has ever believed in me quite the way you do Noah." She whispered. "You make me feel as if I can do anything."
"Now you understand how you make me feel," Puck smiled down at her. "You always believed in me Rachel. I never understood why, but I'm so glad you do."
"I just want you to see in yourself what I see in you," Rachel tucked her hand into his arm in that cute little way she had and began walking again. Puck grinned, she was feeling better. Rachel always walked like this, like something out of a movie when she was feeling confident. It was only when she was unsure that she clung to his hand.
"So how's this work anyway?" Puck wondered, "Do you gotta sit in the audience and watch everyone try out or do they keep you all separated?"
"I think we sit and watch, provided we can be quiet and not heckle," Rachel frowned thoughtfully. "I'm curious to see what Mercedes and Kurt have prepared."
"Something with lotsa high notes for the Chocolate Thunder," Puck shrugged. "And knowing Porcelain, something really over the top."
"I just hope mine isn't too simple, I mean its not a show tune..." Rachel worried.
"It's from your heart Rachel. That's what's in your music," Puck reminded her. "It's your heart that I love. It's why I love your voice so much baby. You got the biggest heart of anyone I know."
They were at the auditorium doors and it was time to be quiet. Puck settled into a chair beside Rachel and slung an arm around her shoulders. They waited through several kids they didn't know, one kid who looked vaguely familiar and Rachel whispered during a break that he was from Carmel, he'd been in Vocal Adrenaline.
Mercedes went next and sang the song from Dreamgirls that would have been her solo back in sophomore year. Puck listened as critically as he could, and looked at Rachel who was frowning thoughtfully. When it was over he leaned over and murmured as quietly as he could, "Her breathin' seemed shallow some times?"
Rachel nodded slowly, her voice a murmur, "She seemed a little pitchy in the middle notes. She's great on the high notes, less controlled on others."
Puck kissed her temple and watched as a couple more kids auditioned, one of them choking and forgetting the words. Then Kurt was up. Puck sank down in his seat as the gay kid practically flew into a flowery melodramatic rendition of 'Don't Cry For Me Argentina'. It was so over the top it was almost painful. Even Rachel was wincing, so he knew Kurt was over-emoting.
When it was over he looked at her and Rachel met his eyes shaking her head, "That was..."
"Worse than a gay pride parade with Judy Garland at its head," Puck muttered grimly. "Love your dads baby but man that was..."
"Your description, while insensitive, is remarkably apt," Rachel murmured back. She sighed and shook her head and he knew that while she wanted to get into Julliard more than any other school, she didn't want her friends to fail either.
Two more auditions and then they called her name. Puck caught Rachel's hand before she left, "Remember baby, I love you. Just be you. You can't lose."
She bent and kissed him gently, "I love you Noah. Thank you."
Puck watched as she hurried down to the stage and grinned as she curtsied properly to the judges. Rachel never could ignore an audience, he wasn't sure why he found that so fucking cute. All of him wanted her to make it, part of him for the purely selfish reasons that Prom was this weekend and he wanted it to be a good one for both of them.
He tilted his head, part of him was always amazed at how right she looked onstage. She just seemed to fill it up with her personality. Puck took a deep breath and let it out slowly, letting Rachel's voice wash over him. She started out soft, gentle almost, as if she was unsure, letting her voice get stronger until it was ringing out on the last line,
"Waking up alone
In a room that still reminds me
My heart has got to learn to forget
Starting on my own
With every breath I'm getting stronger
This is not the time for regret
Cause I don't need to hang on to heartbreak
When there's so much of life left to live,"
The chorus was a cry of defiance, of hope, belief that regardless of the past, she'd be happy again. Puck grinned as she sang, she'd told him she loved this song ever since she'd heard it, it reminded her when Finn dumped her that the world wasn't over, that the heart healed,
"Love is on the way
On wings of angels
I know its true, I feel it coming through
Love is on the way
Time is turning the pages
I don't know when
But love will find me again..."
The second verse wasn't hesitant, it was fervent and full of faith, and Puck was tempted to just close his eyes and let the glory of her voice wash over him she sounded so beautiful,
"I am not afraid
Of the mystery of tomorrow
I have found the faith deep within
There's a promise I have made
There's a dream I'm gonna follow
There's another chance to begin
And it's coming as sure as the heavens
I can feel it right here in my heart..."
Rachel's hands touched her heart and her eyes seemed to stare straight at him and Puck just couldn't look away, her voice was filled with the certainty of love found,
"Love is on the way
On wings of angels
I know its true, I feel it coming through
Love is on the way
Time is turning the pages
I don't know when
But love will find me again..."
She smiled and softly repeated the last lines, sweet with everything Puck knew she felt for him, he could feel his throat tighten, his own feelings trying to get the better of him.
"I don't know when
But love will find me again..."
Puck waited to stand up until the judges had thanked her and then one of them said something in a very low voice that made Rachel's face light up. She thanked them again and nearly ran off the stage and up the aisle to him. The look on her face...the last time she'd looked like that was when he'd told her he loved her, when he'd woken up from the accident, when he'd sung to her after their fight. He put a hand over her mouth when she opened it as if to speak, "Out in the hall baby." He cautioned her. "C'mon."
Puck grinned as the doors shut and Rachel threw herself into his arms, "The judge, the one in the middle..." She whispered into his ear. "After they thanked me...he said... 'Welcome to Julliard Miss Berry'."
"Oh my God! Rachel that's great," Puck hugged her tightly, swung her in a circle. "C'mon, lets go celebrate."
"Hmm...can we celebrate in bed?" Rachel asked and if her voice in his ear hadn't been enough to send blood straight to his dick then her teeth tugging on his ear lobe would have been.
"Fuck yes we can," Puck grinned.
Rachel sighed happily as she tugged the sheets up around her body. She wouldn't have ever believed it freshman year, but she was sharing a hotel room with Noah Puckerman and she wasn't tied up, drugged or drunk. She hadn't even wanted any of the spiked punch at Prom. Noah had done his best to make Prom perfect for her since the last one had been such a disaster. They'd doubled with Lauren and Santana, and Artie had asked Sugar to go with him, of all people. But Sugar could actually be fun when she wasn't trying to be something she wasn't. And Artie seemed to like her. Most of their friends had been there too, Mike and Tina, Sam and Brittney. Blaine had been there with Kurt. Dave had come stag and AZ hadn't bothered, not having a steady girl and not wanting to spend the money.
Puck was lying in his stomach beside her, half asleep and Rachel couldn't help smiling. Her obsessive nature had her thinking of what it would be like to live with him. The apartment her dads were arranging for her in New York was only a one bedroom and it still wasn't a done deal. They were seriously thinking she should live in student housing for the first year at least. They thought the time spent like a normal student would be good for her.
But part of her, the obsessive part, wanted to get that apartment and have Puck move in with her. She loved being in bed beside him, the night after her party when they'd slept in her bed was one of her more treasured memories. And now she had another one, a lovely evening with her boyfriend, followed by a wonderful night.
"What're you thinkin' baby," Puck's eyes opened lazily. "Hmm...you're way too far away," He tugged her closer, sliding her body against his.
"I was thinking of how much I love this, being in bed with you, spending the night," Rachel admitted. "I know its too soon to even think about..."
"Yeah probably," Puck was kissing her neck again, his mouth hot on her skin. "But I know what you mean. Love you so much, wanna spend every day with you. Keep you with me at night."
"I keep thinking about the apartment in New York," Rachel admitted. "How much I'd want you there with me," She sighed.
"That's so damn tempting," Puck agreed. "Maybe that's why it ain't a done deal yet? So we don't move in together too soon?"
"I've been wondering about that," She sighed. "They promised I'd have an apartment in New York, but they never said when."
Puck rolled her on her back and pressed a kiss to her mouth, "Much as we'd both love it...you really think we're ready to move in together Rache?"
"I'd like to say yes," Rachel groaned into his mouth. "But we're probably not."
"Someday baby," Puck was kissing her throat and down her collarbone to her breasts. "But for right now..."
"Hmm...right now I want you inside me," Rachel whispered. "I just want us to be together tonight." She wrapped her legs around his waist, "I love you Noah."
"God baby, I love you too," Puck's mouth was so warm, how could his mouth be so warm and still make her shiver. Rachel's hands slid over his head tugging at his mohawk as his lips surrounded her nipple and she gave herself up to everything he made her feel.
Rachel couldn't help giggling as Santana sat down next to her. They'd all agreed to have breakfast the morning after prom. But with the amount of time they'd spent dancing and then in their respective rooms afterwards, it was more like brunch.
"What's so funny B?" Santana tilted her head.
"Oh I was just thinking of how everything circles around," Rachel shook her head. Puck slid into the booth next to her and Lauren joined Santana. "This is only the third night I've spent with Noah, and the first one Lauren was in the same bed. Now we've double dated for prom."
"You slept with Lauren?" Santana's jaw dropped.
Rachel rolled her eyes, "No. Not like that."
Puck shook his head, "We were all covered San, its not like we had an orgy. It was Valentines Day, none of us wanted to be alone. We weren't drinking, though we did have a sugar high."
"We'd had a movie marathon," Rachel explained. "It was late, my dads weren't home because it was Valentines Day. I just...wanted the company. We didn't get naked or anything."
"So Rachel has kissed both of you, and been in bed with both of you," Santana looked at her girlfriend and her ex boyfriend. "That's it."
"What's it?" Lauren's hand was petting Santana's arm, "Babe, don't be mad, it was before we were even dating."
"I am going to find out what the big deal is," Santana frowned. "And neither of you," She pointed at Puck and Lauren, "Are going to get mad at me."
Rachel blinked, and looked at her boyfriend, "What is she talking-"
She didn't get to finish the sentence, Santana's hands cupped her face, turning her so she was meeting the pretty Latina's gaze. "This is what I'm talking about," Santana pressed her lips to Rachel's.
Rachel stiffened in shock and jerked away, "Santana, what are you doing?" She backed up against Puck.
"I wanna kiss," Santana frowned at her. "It's not fair that they've gotten to kiss you and I haven't. Blaine's kissed you. Finn's kissed you. Even that idiot Jesse has kissed you."
"Don't remind me," Rachel groaned. "I was drunk when I kissed Blaine, stupid when I kissed Jesse. I don't have any excuse for Finn."
"But I've never gotten to kiss you," Santana pouted. "You're my friend B, why don't you want to kiss me?"
"Santana have you been drinking?" Rachel asked with a frown.
"No," Santana was still pouting and Lauren shook her head to confirm when Rachel looked at her.
"Then why is this such a big deal to you?"
"Because... I don't know. It just feels like a big deal. I've seen you kiss Lauren and Puck. And you and me are tight..." Santana shook her head, "Maybe I just feel...left out or something."
"Hmm..." Rachel thought about it for a moment. "Noah, if I kissed Santana, would you mind?" She looked at her boyfriend.
"Nah," Puck shook his head, "Only reason I got pissed over the summer was you were trying to back up and Lauren wasn't stopping."
"Lauren, would you be angry?" Rachel looked at her first real girlfriend and the girl wrestler shook her head slowly. "All right then, but San, I'm kissing you. So when I stop, it stops, got it?"
"Yeah," Santana grinned and Rachel wondered why this made San so happy. Maybe San wasn't sure if someone really liked her unless they tried to hit on her? That would make a weird sort of sense.
"And we're not doing this again," Rachel clarified. "You're my friend and we're not going to mess that up with extraneous kissing. Right?"
"Right," Santana nodded with a little bounce in her seat.
"You really are happy about this," Rachel blinked in surprise. "Were you really feeling that bad that you and I hadn't kissed?"
"Brittney's the only other girl I was super tight with and she didn't... well she didn't want me for a girlfriend," Santana shrugged. "I love Lauren. I guess part of me feels rejected if you don't want to kiss me. If Puck wouldn't let you I'd understand because guys get territorial. But if you don't want to, it means you don't think I'm pretty...and since we're friends and we're supposed to see the best in each other..."
"Me not thinking you're attractive would mean we're not as good of friends as you think," Rachel rolled her eyes. "That's some circuitous logic you've got there San."
"Yeah I know, I'm fucked up," The Cheerio shrugged. "But I wants my Berry kisses now."
"Okay," Rachel giggled part of her unable to believe she was doing this. The things I do for my friends, she thought as she leaned in and pressed her mouth to Santana's. The Latina's lips were soft, tasted like bubblegum lip gloss, and Rachel nibbled at them until Santana's mouth fell open in a sigh. Soft, sweet and gentle, Rachel kissed the other girl for a little longer before drawing away. "All right?"
Santana blinked at her as she opened her eyes, "Wow B."
"What?" Rachel leaned back against Puck.
"You guys were right," Santana had definitely stopped pouting and was looking pretty pleased with herself. "Berry is a damn good kisser."
"We told you that," Lauren reminded her girlfriend.
"Yeah but Puck's in love with her, and you said she was the first girl you'd kissed so I wasn't sure you two were like impartial," Santana explained. "But she's really good."
"Should I take her surprise as an insult?" Rachel wondered aloud. "Considering this is technically cheating on my boyfriend?"
"It ain't cheating if I'm right here," Puck reassured her. "Santana just isn't used to anyone being on her level is all. She'll get past the shock in a minute or so." He took her hand and pressed it to his jeans, "If you want to do it again though, make it in a private room where I can get you to bed right away."
"I'll keep that in mind," She nodded and pressed a kiss to his cheek. Rachel watched as Puck took a couple of deep breaths and then picked up a menu.
"So are we eating or what?" He asked, "I'm starvin' and we still gotta get home."
"We are definitely eating," Rachel nodded. "You paid for dinner last night so this morning is my treat. Please?" Puck seemed about to object but nodded his agreement and Rachel grinned, "Thank you Noah." Lauren began a debate about the merits of fried versus scrambled eggs and it grew to encompass all breakfast food versus dinner or lunch. The resulting conversation lasted until they'd gotten into the limo and most of the car ride home.
Author's Note: So don't flip out people. This isn't about to become a PuckPezBerry story. It's just the sort of silliness that tends to happen in certain situations. I doubt Santana has ever had a relationship outside of her family that hasn't involved sex somehow and it doesn't seem that she'd know how to handle it. So being friends with Rachel, of course she tries to bring sex into it somehow. And Rachel being Rachel, wouldn't automatically tell her no because she likes San and doesn't want to hurt her feelings. After all, Rachel knows plenty about feeling left out. I've kissed girls/women for far less noble reasons. And someone...who shall remain nameless...has been waiting for Rachel and Santana to kiss sooo...why not since it fit in anyway.
We're getting close to the end of this... a few more things that I want to tie up and then... well, we'll see won't we. I think it'll only be a chapter or two. But I'm pretty pleased with how this is turning out. I hope all of you are too.