Warning: AU –Second World War
M-Rated!Contains coarse language, violent imaginary related to the context of war, and sex.
I do not own South Park. I do not own anything. I wish I was that f* genius!
"So…what do you think of my kingdom?"
Kenny asked with a wide smile at the end of his tour in the flat, while he spread his arms to emphasize his words. Kyle wrinkled his nose at the comment. The flat was far from being a kingdom. It was small and completely packed up, so it looked even smaller. Kenny's bedroom was miniscule. It had an old wooden bed, looking like it would collapse any day now. There was a small wardrobe at one of the corners and one chair. With only these three pieces of furniture, the room was already crowded. He had no wallpaper. He needed no wallpaper. The walls were completely filled up with magazine pictures of fully- and semi-nude women.
The vacant room, in the contrary, had ugly barren grey walls. It had no piece of furniture, only an old matrass on the floor and Kyle had the unpleasant feeling it had been found somewhere on the side of some street. The bathroom was absolutely gross. How in Earth the other could feel clean after a shower in such a dirty place, was beyond Kyle's understanding. So much for hygiene. The Jew walked back into the living room/kitchen, where they had drunken tea just moments ago. Besides the small table with two chairs and a worn-out couch, there were many boxes and papers lying around. The redhead's eyes fell on a writing machine at the division's corner.
"Are you a writer?" Kyle asked instead.
"I'm a journalist, or at least, I'm a trainee at the Daily Journal of New York." Kenny happily explained. "I hope they'll hire me soon, the internship will end up in two months."
"I hope you get it." Kyle sincerely said.
"So, are you thinking to stay, or what?" Kenny cheerfully asked, shaking his arms a couple times back and forth until his hands met in a nervous clap. The Jew could feel the anticipation grow by the other boy.
Kyle would have asked some time to think about it, but he could already feel the pressure Kenny was putting him under into deciding right now. The problem was, Kyle didn't like the looks of the place. It was too cramped and dirty. Worse of all, he would have sworn he saw mice running away and hiding inside the walls of Kenny's bedroom. Not that there was nothing to do about it. There were poisons and cats in the world for a reason. The redhead was sure the place would be more habitable if it would be tidied and well cleaned up. The flat had to be scrubbed and disinfected to its core. He did like its central location. It was close to the subway and a mere ten minutes' walk to Central Park. Most of all, as peculiar and unusual as Kenny was (after all, how many people die and resuscitate in a daily basis?), the Jew had found it easy to sympathize with him. He subconsciously smiled when he balanced his options and made his decision.
"Yes. I would love to stay." Kyle happily said and Kenny instantly jumped in the air while cheering a loud woohoo. "But…" The redhead said with a chuckle, amused by the blonde's enthusiastic reaction. Kenny stopped cheering and stared at him surprised, with a hint of fear in his eyes. "…with the condition this place gets properly cleaned up." Kenny let out a relieved hearty laughter and put one hand behind his head.
"Yeah….I guess it does needs to be cleaned." The blonde said, clearly feeling embarrassed. "When would you like to move in?"
"Actually, as soon as possible. I'm in a guesthouse and I only start working after this weekend. I kinda need to be careful with expenses."
"You can move tonight already! I'll ask Martha to lend us some linen." Kenny said excited. "I have no food in the kitchen right now, but I know this place and it's really cheap! Even I can afford it!"
"Really? I-I don't want to be a bother." Kyle said and suddenly wasn't very enthusiast to try out the old matrass and the filthy toilet just yet. "The guesthouse is on the other side of the city and I still have to…" Kyle lost his tracks when he saw the happy smile in Kenny's face fade away and be replaced by a saddened and disappointed look. He suddenly felt guilty and imagined the other boy was lonely. "What I mean is, it could be rather late before I arrive here. I don't know if you have to get up early tomorrow."
"Oh no, that won't be a problem! I always go late to bed anyway." Kenny dismissed, his cheerful smile back on his face.
"Okay. In that case… I'll be going now to get my stuff!"
"Cool! See you later, then!"
And so, Kyle exited the small flat smiling nervously. He liked Kenny. He just didn't like the prospect of sleeping in such a dirty place. So, in the way to the guesthouse, Kyle memo-ed to himself which cleaning products he would have to buy the next day. He had the feeling tomorrow he would spend his time scrubbing the house from top to bottom. And wondered to what point he had inherited this cleaning obsession from his mother. Once he packed up all his stuff, he went right away back to Kenny's flat. He was exhausted, and although he was starving, he preferred the idea of sleeping over food. But when Kenny asked him if he wanted to have a midnight snack, Kyle's stomach just couldn't refuse such an invitation. And so, the boys went to Kenny's favorite place, Café Desirée, which served snacks and warm meals till 3a.m.
"You have no idea how relieved I am that I'm having you as my new roommate." Kenny said while he took a sip from his soda can."
"Why is that?" Kyle asked curious, while he put a mouthful rice in his mouth.
"You have no idea the kind of freaks that are around here! I put that add, like, two weeks ago and, if guys were lucky to not see me die and run away afterwards, well, they were like the weirdest people you could ever meet. You know, like, real creeps!" Kenny said with such a genuine sincerity that his words sounded unintentionally funny. Kyle almost chocked in his food when a giggle arose. He cleaned his mouth with the napkin while still giggling.
"I know perfectly well what you mean." Kyle said while his memory joggled back to the different places he visited during the day. He retold his day's adventures and afterwards Kenny shared his doses of very disastrous meetings. Their stories originated a series of giggles and hearty laughter in the café. Despite the fun he was having, after an hour, Kyle barely could keep his eyes open, so the boys decided to go home and sleep. When Kenny showed him to his room, Kyle collapsed on the worn-out matrass. The Jew didn't care anymore how dirty or uncomfortable his bed could be. He was too tired to bother. He had, after all, lived in much worse conditions, even if his mind refused to acknowledge it sometimes. And so he feel asleep, his last thoughts losing themselves in the mist of time, watching mixed images of barren snowy lands, tall skyscrapers and the unclear image of a large Nazi smiling back at him.
…
It took Kyle three long days to get the apartment properly clean. He bought poison to kill the mice, scrubbed the walls, the floor, the little furniture there was, the kitchen. Basically everything. The Jew was seriously worried he was turning into his mom, because he was sure he was as paranoid as she was when it came down to germs. After all, he was only satisfied with the bathroom after he cleaned and disinfected it five times. Kenny was fortunately most of the time away due to his internship, so he missed Kyle's mad inner conflicts, when he cursed and swore to himself for being this obsessive. The redhead was aware of his unhealthy behavior and tried to convince himself the place was clean, but there seemed to be a higher force that prevented it from happening. But fortunately, mid-way the third day, something wonderful happened. Kyle stopped, looked around him and a marvelous sensation of relieve swept over his mind and body. The apartment was sparkling clean, smelled fresh and looked appealing, despite the lack of furniture and decoration. The Jew collapsed on the old couch giggling almost insanely. His compulsive obsessive behavior melted away, while a fantastic sense of pride and fulfillment invaded his mind. He finally allowed himself to relax.
Kenny returned in the evening and was surprised not to hear any sound of water dripping, scrubbing or muffed cursing. He silently walked in and breathed in the pleasant scent of flowers. It was already dark, but he still could see the improvement in the flat under the dim artificial light. Although he had though his roommate overreacted in what concerned the neatness of the apartment, he had to admit that it did look now much better, more appealing and inviting. The blonde was about to call out for his friend, when he heard a soft snoring coming from nearby. He smiled when he saw the redhead sleeping peacefully on the couch and was about to leave to the room when Kyle spoke in a hoarse voice.
"You're back."
"I didn't mean to wake you up." Kenny apologized. He figured out the Jew must have a really light sleep because he didn't make any sound.
"Ugh…I don't remember closing my eyes." Kyle said in a sleepy and complaining tone, while he sat up. He looked up and realized the sun had already set down. "What time is it?"
"It's half past seven." Kenny said, looking at his watch.
"Oh, I dozed off for hours! Wow, I've must have been really tired."
"Haha! No wonder! I though you never would stop with the scrubbing." Kenny said in a hearty laugh. "To be honest, I was starting to worry about you."
"Me too." Kyle confessed with an embarrassed smile. "But hey, the place is clean now."
"I'll keep it this way, I promise." Kenny said while he place his left hand on his heart and lifted his right in an oath sign. Kyle barked a laughter and got up. He headed to the refrigerator, feeling rather hungry after the long day work. Alas, there was nothing in it, only a half pack mild and some pickles.
"Oh great. We're out of food."
…
Kenny and Kyle ate dinner at Café Desirée again. Both boys were too tired and not with the mood to do grocery. Fortunately, thanks to Kenny's recurrent visits in the café, they made especial discounts for him and his friends. It was the first time they ate together since Kyle moved in, because Kenny worked till late the past days and when he would arrive home, his roommate would already be in a deep sleep. So it was a pleasant opportunity for the boys to get to learn each other better.
"So, journalist, heh?" Kyle asked, while they ate warm soup.
"Actually, my big dream is to become a writer. Journalism is my way to make a breakthrough. You know, meet new people in the branch, make connections, built up a reputation." Kenny explained. "Do you mind if I write a report about the camps during the war based in your information? It could help me to be acknowledged."
"Sure, whenever you want."
"Great!" Kenny cheerfully said and took a sip from his spoon. Kyle grimaced, feeling a bit unsure and uneasy about talking about his time in Dachau. He didn't quite know how he would camouflage his almost 2-year stay in Herr Cartman's condominium. But he decided not to worry about that for now. He would know in the moment itself how far he could trust Kenny.
"Don't you think they kinda abuse you? I mean, they put you working till late in the night, expect you to be there early in the morning and for what? A miserable loan? I mean, you're receiving 50% from what you should earn!" Kyle pointed out. Kenny gulped his soup and faced his friend.
"Hey, I'm already happy I get paid. There are enough internships where you don't earn a penny." Kenny replied while in pointed his spoon to Kyle.
"Uhm…I guess. I just…find it unfair. Working so hard for so little."
"Strange that you may speak of fairness. After all, the way the Nazi treated you was far from being fair." Kenny said absentminded. He only realized what he had said when he noticed the silence coming from opposite him. He lifted his head and was faced with a strange impassive face, but he could see the emotion in the green eyes. "Uh, I'm sorry. I guess that's something impossible to compare."
"Totally! It was not like I and the rest of the Jews had a choice?!"Kyle said revolted. "It was…It was survival. Yeah, at a certain point, that was the only thing that mattered." He said in a strange distant voice, like if he was forcing himself to remember an almost forgotten memory. "You have no idea the kind of strain they put us under. From one day to the other, you lose your freedom. All your rights and dreams are stripped away. And you land in this Hell of misery, death, disease, madness, despair, starvation…" Kyle stopped himself in the middle of his rant to take a deep breath. He noticed Kenny's blue eyes were resting on his right hand, on his spoon. Kyle followed his gaze and noticed that drops of soup feel from the spoon because of the way his hand was trembling. He gently put down the spoon and rubbed his hands together. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't talk about this…I'm getting myself all worked up."
"You're all worked up because you've been bottling this up for a long time." Kenny wisely pointed out. Kyle looked a bit caught and stared at the other boy. A chill ran down his spine when he saw the same old wise look in the blue eyes as in the day they first met. "When was the last time you talked about the war?"
"Actually…since it ended, since I got reunited with my family." Kyle confessed. He exhaled nervously, while his brushed his fingers in his curls. "My mother refused to talk about it. Ever. It became a taboo at home."
"How did you all survive that long?" Kenny suddenly asked in pure wonder. "You said you were in the camp in the winter of '43. How is it possible that you and all your family survived those two years, with all those atrocities going on? I mean, what are the odds?" Kyle felt the blood rush down his face. He stared wide-eyed at Kenny, guilt and shame imprinted in his face. And instantly knew the other never would believe any of his lies. Yet, he decided to give it a try.
"We were lucky." He softly said, while he picked up his spoon again, ignoring how badly his hand shook and took a few sips of his soup.
"It was more than luck. That is more than obvious! I'm not stupid, you know?" Kenny replied clearly offended. "You're clearly hiding something. But it's fine if you don't trust me into telling me the truth!" He bitterly added.
Kyle lifted his head in shock. Kenny's words had stung his heart. His stomach revolved at the feeling. He knew the blonde had spoken those words out of rage. Maybe it was a way of manipulating him into talking. But the redhead had the awful feeling Kenny truly felt shut out. He wondered to what point the blond was so lonely that he was in desperate need of comradeship. Because Kyle had already understood, during their first meeting, that Kenny's easy smile was nothing but a façade. A smile that hid his real suffering. Because, the boy's close connection to death had to have consequences. The Jew could just imagine how easy it was for people not to understand such a strange phenomenon and be frightened by it. He could just imagine how society would shut Kenny away. How painful it should be to for Kenny to continuously try and make friends, only to lose them again. To wish people would trust him but only receive wariness back, instead. Kyle stared guiltily at his bowl with soup and then back to his friend.
"I cannot talk about it here." Kyle whispered in confidentiality and Kenny, who seemed suddenly very eager in finishing his soup, lifted his head to meet earnest green eyes. His spoon remained trapped between his teeth during some seconds of surprise. "I don't want…I cannot risk others listening to it." The redhead explained.
Kenny nodded slowly. There was something that frightened him in those forest green eyes. He had expected to read fear in then when Kyle those words. Instead he saw a large amount of hurt. And wondered, how far he really wanted to hear the truth.